Chapter 4 #6
Genevieve found it almost impossible to trust anyone.
Theo remembered how cheerful and lively she was as a child.
Yet it had taken her a long time to trust the men in the family, including him and his other cousins.
And she had avoided any true physical contact with her new family for years before her guard fell.
But it was evident she was conflicted when it came to believing he wouldn’t betray any trust she placed in him, and that was his doing.
From the moment he’d entered the croft, he’d done nothing to make her believe she was safe with him.
Instead of reasoning with her, as Peter would have, he’d autocratically informed her she would not enter the East End without him as a partner.
Then he’d overstepped so many boundaries when he’d demanded to see her stab wound.
Worst of all, he’d lost all reason and made love to her, only to act like a tyrant when she’d refused to marry him.
Not to mention how fearless and strong she’d been to admit she’d taken pleasure in their lovemaking.
And Christ Jesus, he’d been thunderstruck when she’d been so pragmatic in her offer to be his mistress.
In fact, her practical attitude had been nothing short of remarkable.
It had taken extraordinary courage to risk proposing such an arrangement, no matter how inappropriate.
Yet her efforts to protect herself hadn’t prevented Genevieve from paying a high price for the risk she’d taken.
In declining her offer, Theo had humiliated her.
He was certain she’d viewed his response as being scorned by him.
It didn’t matter how gentle his refusal had been.
His rejection had only reinforced what her past had led her to believe.
Genevieve believed she was worthy of only being his mistress, not his wife.
And despite Theo’s efforts to convince her she was wrong, he’d failed.
It would take time and persistence to convince her that her past didn’t make her unworthy.
In fact, her ability to survive a terrifying childhood only accentuated how strong, courageous, and resilient she was.
Few women could have survived what Genevieve had endured.
Yet she was fearless in her determination to live life the way she wanted.
With the darkness of her past, it was understandable she wouldn’t want to be under any man’s thumb ever again.
While the laws were beginning to change, they still offered women little say in their lives once they were married.
Given Genevieve’s vicious rejection of his marriage proposal, it was obvious she didn’t trust him to follow through on his promise to make her independent.
That’s what he’d missed all afternoon. She didn’t trust him.
Not only that, he’d given Genevieve leverage to use against him in the future by admitting she was right.
Theo did want her. He wanted her desperately.
He could have spent the next week here in the croft making love to her.
Hell, even that wouldn’t be enough. But he wanted her as his wife, not as his mistress.
Convincing Genevieve to be Lady Selbourne was a problem he had no solution to at the moment.
It was a problem that pitted him against an almost insurmountable goal, and what the hell was he going to do if she became with child?
She’d said she would deal with the matter herself, but he wasn’t about to let that happen.
Before Theo had known Genevieve was working for the Crown, he’d known protecting her would be difficult.
Now, knowing that she worked for the Foreign Section, only meant Theo’s work had become all the challenging.
With his reckless behavior and questionable judgement today, Theo had managed to make a situation already fraught with danger even more hazardous.
God help him if he made the mistake of developing feelings for Genevieve.
The thought came out of nowhere, and it sent his heart slamming into his breastbone so hard, he sucked in a breath of discomfort.
What the hell was he thinking? Nothing like that was going to happen. He couldn’t—wouldn’t let that happen.
Behind him, the croft door opened with a loud squeak, and Theo turned to watch Genevieve step out into the light. The vulnerability of earlier was gone, her mask of serenity restored. For not the first time, he acknowledged just how special Genevieve was.
His best friend had recognized the fact long ago. Peter had understood the woman who’d grown up overnight in the East End better than anyone, until now. Today he’d realized what Peter had known all along.
Genevieve needed a man who was strong enough to know when to hold her and persuade her to a different mindset, yet wise enough to know when to let her stand on her own. As she closed the small distance between them, Theo murmured his reiteration of the promise he’d made to his friend.
“I swear by the sword and blood of Angus Stewart I’ll give my life to protect her, Peter. And I swear I’ll strive to be the man she needs me to be.”