Chapter 37 #2
I shrug. “I think one guy tried once, but he lost interest pretty quickly and the others were more casual relationships. After that, I just stopped expecting it.”
Rhys side-eyes me.
I huff and roll my eyes. “I was young, dumb and desperate for attention and affection. Plus, my taste in men was seriously concerning.”
I almost cringe at how bad my romantic life was during college and university.
Not so much the number of partners I had, but more that I had zero self-worth and allowed them to walk all over me and treat me like shit.
I think out of the several men I was with, only one treated me with some respect, and even then it was a very fleeting relationship.
And then Gale happened.
I hate that it took him rejecting me on my wedding day for me to see the truth, but at least I did. And thank fuck for that, because I would have gone insane if I’d had to deal with that man during the apocalypse.
“Was?” Rhys says sceptically.
My eyes narrow. “Yes, was. Don’t you try that self-deprecating bullshit with me. While the relationship between me and you guys hasn’t been smooth sailing, you’ve never once made me feel less than. You’re good men… even if you’re a grumpy bastard.”
He chuckles lightly and holds his hands up in surrender. “Alright, I believe you.”
We settle back into easy silence.
I focus back on washing him, making sure to be gentle around the heaviest bruising on his face.
Once I’m sure I’ve got all the dirt and blood from his face and neck, I put the bucket aside and grab the blanket.
It’s thankfully big enough to wrap around both of us.
The fabric is thin and scratchy against my skin, but I don’t care.
What matters is that it chases away some of the chill and makes me feel less vulnerable and exposed.
“You know,” Rhys says quietly as I adjust the blanket around us. “You’re the first person I’ve done anything sexual with since my divorce.”
I’m shocked to stillness and stare at the back of his head with a gaping mouth. “You’re joking.”
He looks over his shoulder at me, a wry smile on his lips. “Would I really joke about having a non-existent sex life before a few days ago?”
There are a million things I want to say. Things that will soothe his ego and show my incredulous shock over how a gorgeous man like him isn’t fighting off potential partners with a stick.
Unfortunately, the words that come out are none of those things.
“I don’t know if finger fucking me at a shooting range can be considered a sex life.”
He snorts and shakes his head. “Well, you’re just fantastic for my ego, aren’t you?” He sighs and turns back around to stare at the garage door, the moon peeking through the broken windows. “You’re the first person who’s really taken an interest.”
I find that hard to believe. “Or I’m the first person brave, but stupid enough to dig my way past that grumpy scowl you constantly wear.” I want to poke him but keep my fingers to myself, mostly because his ribs have been abused enough.
“That’s a very apt description of you,” he says with a nod.
I glare at the back of his head, the urge to poke him rising again. Maybe I can find a less bruised spot on his side…
“But I’d say your most attractive quality is your unwavering loyalty,” he continues.
“There have been so many times I've told you to get yourself to safety, only for you to turn around and do the complete opposite to save others. No matter how much danger it puts you in, you still do anything in your power to save as many people as you can. It’s honestly as infuriating as it is arousing.” I can hear the amused frustration in his voice.
My plotting stutters to a stop as his words sink in. “Huh… and here I thought you hated it.”
“Oh, I do. I hate every second of you being in danger and being unable to do anything but help as best I can. I mean—fuck—the night the horde got through the gate, my heart was in my throat the entire fight. I hated watching you fight for your life alongside Andy, and the fact you saved all of our asses… you’re incredible,” he says, awe in his voice.
“And I wanted nothing more than to spank your ass red and then tie you to my bed so there’d be no chance of you doing that again. ”
“Don’t threaten me with a good time.” The words spill from my mouth before I can snap it shut.
He whips his head around and arches an eyebrow at me. “Is that something you’re interested in, princess?” His voice drops an octave, turning into a low growl that, if we were anywhere else, would have me jumping on his dick.
After being spanked, of course.
However, the sexual tension dissipates when he shifts and hisses, his expression contorting with pain. The gravity of our situation crashes over us like a bucket of cold water.
He sighs, the sound heavy and filled with regret, and turns back to the garage door. “I’ll get you out of here. Whatever it takes, I’ll make sure you survive.”
I remain silent.
I hate that he doesn’t say us, like he’s not expecting to survive this. But I’ll be damned if I let him sacrifice himself for me. Whatever happens, I’m going to make sure we both get out of this alive. No matter what.