Chapter Six
ELLA
I slept horribly last night. Just knowing that Liam is in the same building as I am, possibly with a fiancée who could be my daughter’s stepmother, makes my skin crawl.
After I finish draining my cup of coffee and place it in the sink, I grab my purse and keys, ready to head out for the day. First stop, my parents’ house to give my girl a hug and kiss, and next stop, work. My scrubs are purple with little cats running around on them, and my hair is in two Dutch braids. Macie had a field day picking out all my scrubs with me when I first got this job.
I know I told Brynn I would tell Liam about Macie, but I’ve gone back and forth on that decision all night, and I’m still not completely sure. I mean, I don’t even know what apartment he lives in. It would be just my luck if he ended up in the only empty unit on my floor. If it came down to it, I could always ask the super about it. She went to high school with Nolan and Jayce and thinks Macie is just the cutest thing ever.
Shaking my head, I lock my door behind me and start down the hall. Maybe our schedules will be so different that we’ll never cross paths and I can’t be blamed for not talking to him. I know that’s wishful thinking, but a girl can hope, right? I feel like a coward, but this is so much more than just me talking to an ex, mostly because he’s not even an ex. This conversation could uproot our entire lives and change everything as Macie and I know it.
And because yes, that is just my luck, I’m only a couple of doors down when Liam comes up the stairs, dressed in running gear and sweating profusely. He briefly glances in my direction as he approaches his door, then does a double take, smiling brightly at me.
“Hey, Ella! Are you on this floor?”
“Oh, yeah, I’m just a couple of doors down,” I tell him, looking away quickly when I feel my cheeks heat up at his stare. How can his gaze still affect me like this after so long? There’s no way for him to know, but I feel like I’m wearing a giant sign that reads “I masturbated to memories of you in my shower last night.”
“I’m just coming back from a run. It’s so cool you grew up here. This is a neat little town.”
I look back at him, and there’s nothing but genuine sincerity in his expression. He’s always given off major “city-boy” vibes, especially considering he was working in Boston a few weeks ago. I’m surprised that he doesn’t think the town is too small or crowded.
“You’ll change your mind once you have everyone in your business,” I try to joke.
“I’m pretty used to that,” he says with a wry grin, then shakes his head. I wonder what he means by that. Maybe his fiancée is a busybody.
Instead of asking him what I really want to, I decide to bite the bullet. My parents couldn’t keep Macie for another night, so maybe he can do breakfast. “Liam, do you… Would you want to grab breakfast with me? I worked some serious overtime yesterday, and they said I could come in late…”
Regret passes over his features. “Dammit, I can’t today. I have my first shift at UVM that I have to get ready for, but I really wanted to see you and I was going to ask if you could do dinner.”
So he is at UVM.
I grimace. “I can’t do dinner tonight.” It’s not like I can tell him why I can’t do dinner, and the look of disappointment that takes over his face is enough to have me quickly saying, “But, if you can swing lunch, I can come to you.”
Linda told me to work my day however I needed to if I didn’t care about keeping the overtime.
His face lights up and he bounces on his heels. “Does one work? I’ve seen this little Mexican place across the street from UVM that we could do. Are you sure it’s not too far for you to drive?”
“One is perfect. And it’s okay, I have overtime to play with and I’m sure it’s hard to go out to lunch when you work at a hospital.” I give him a little smile before heading down the stairs.
By the time I’ve stopped by to see Macie and then get to work, my head is spinning. What if he doesn’t show up? No, of course, he will. But what will I even say? Do I just come right out and tell him he has a kid? Or do I try to get a gauge for his life now and see what the best way to bring it up is? What about his fiancée? He didn’t mention anything about her this morning. Maybe she didn’t come with him?
The fact that he’s agreeing to have lunch with me while he’s engaged just confirms one thing for me. He doesn’t see me in that way anymore.
I can’t quite decide if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.
* * *
Liam’s smile is infectious as he gets up from his seat at the table to give me a quick hug. It’s a small two-person table that already has two waters and a bowl of tortilla chips. “Ella! I’m so damn happy we worked something out.” He looks great in his short-sleeved blue scrubs, his sandy blond hair ruffled oh-so intentionally.
This really is a cute little place, each of the interior walls is painted a different bright color. Red, teal, and yellow greet me, and there are papel picado -style decorations lining the walls.
I find myself smiling at his enthusiasm. “Me, too. Have you been here long?”
“Not at all, I just sat down. You look great, by the way.” He even comes around to my side of the table and pulls out my seat for me. My face heats slightly at the gentlemanly gesture, not sure what to make of the attention.
I raise my brows, glancing down at my scrubs. “Oh yeah?”
“Anything you wear looks good on you,” he mumbles, using one hand to grip the back of his neck. I stop myself from asking him what his fiancée would think of a comment like that, instead opting for a quiet, blushing “thank you.” Unfortunately, this leaves plenty of room for tension to fill the air, like neither of us knows quite what to say. I can’t help but miss the easy way we talked during our night together and wish things could be like that again. Too much has changed, though.
Thankfully, we’re saved from the quiet by the waitress coming by and taking our drink and food orders.
She leaves and I don’t know if I can take the awkward silence anymore, so I say the first thing that comes to my mind. “So, um, how’s wedding planning going?”
Liam nearly chokes on his water at my question, and I wince a little as he clears his throat. “Yeah, about that. I’m not engaged… or seeing anyone, really. That’s what I was trying to tell you a couple of weeks ago.”
Not… getting married? But that nurse said…
I shake my head. “That nurse said something about a fiancée, though.”
“Yeah… my mom, she’s a little… overzealous. She really wants me to settle down and get married. That was just her massively overstepping.”
“Wow… that’s…” I don’t even know what to say. What kind of mom is so insistent on her grown son getting married? Then, his words sink in, and a wave of relief washes over me. He’s not engaged. He’s single. There’s no mystery stepmom in my daughter’s future if I decide to tell Liam about her. I don’t want to acknowledge the swooping in my stomach that has nothing to do with his role as Macie’s dad.
Liam scratches the back of his neck. “What, um… What about you? Um. Any wedding planning… or anything??”
What? Wedding? I nearly snort in my laughter. “Absolutely not. Never engaged, married, or anything like that. In fact, there hasn’t been anyone of note in my life in about four years…” I trail off, hoping he gets the hint.
His eyes widen slightly, and I swear I can see him doing the math in his head. “Wow, um,” he clears his throat, “that’s a long time. I… I would know.”
My mouth goes dry. Is he saying what I think he’s saying? I can’t imagine why that would be the case for him. He’s insanely hot, funny, sweet, and he’s a damn doctor, for crying out loud. I would have thought he’d have to beat the women off with a stick.
Just then, our food comes, and I’ve never been so relieved to get carne asada tacos in my life. We eat in silence for a moment, but something keeps bothering me. I can’t stop thinking about the accident so many years ago. I’ve turned it around in my head so many times throughout the years. I would have bet my life that he’s the one who pulled me from that car after my accident, the night after our one-night stand.
But if he was, why didn’t he stick around after? I want so badly to ask him, but he beats me to it.
“I meant to ask, how did your recovery go? After the car accident a few years ago?”
Oh my god. Everyone thought I was crazy or that I had been imagining things when I hit my head, but it really was Liam who saved me.
Memories of the accident flash through my mind. Unbearable pain, but between all of it, snippets of Liam’s voice made its way through.
“Ell, wake up, sweetheart. We have to get you to the hospital.”
Then, the one that even I was sure I had imagined. Cold numbness, beeping in the background, and a promise so quiet it almost gets lost.
“Dammit, Ella, don’t give up. I promise I’ll always protect you if you just make it through this.”
Blinking away the tears that started gathering, I try to sound unaffected. “It was you. I… I know you were just doing your job, but regardless… Thank you. For saving me.”
“I hope you know, Ella…” he trails off before clearing his throat and looking at me. “Even if it wasn’t my job, I still would have done it. I’m just grateful I was there.”
His words practically make the air whoosh from my lungs, so I glaze past his confession and choke out the little synopsis of all my injuries I’ve perfected over the years.
“My recovery was fine. I had a few broken ribs, a broken arm, and a concussion, but I had my family to help me through it. Oh, yeah, and I have a giant scar on my thigh from where a piece of metal went through it, which obviously you know about. Not the scar. The injury.” I let out an awkward laugh. “But yeah, it was fine.”
I know it absolutely sounds like it was anything but fine, but I’ve been asked about it so many times over since the accident that I’m used to brushing it off. The scar isn’t something I’ve even had the opportunity to be self-conscious about, given the fact I haven’t slept with anyone since I got it.
“Oh, Ella….” He looks at me like he finally realizes just how much that night still affects me. “Ella that… that doesn’t sound okay. I know how hard recovery from trauma like that can be.”
“It was…” I admit. But it all fell to the wayside when I realized I wasn’t going to be able to contact the father of my unborn child .
Yeah, not saying that.
“I had my parents and Brynn to help me through it, though.”
“You know, I always regretted not convincing you to give me your number. Or sneaking you mine somehow.”
His words have my heart pounding in my chest. He’s not engaged. He’s not even dating anyone, and he’s sitting here telling me he’s been thinking about me. This is where I tell him about Macie. This is where I say that I had wished I had given him my number too, and not just because I missed him.
But something is holding me back. It’s like… I’m suddenly terrified he’ll think I’m trying to baby trap him. Or that he’ll only want to be with me out of obligation, or that he’ll end up resenting me for forcing him into a role he didn’t want to play.
“I’ve always regretted that I didn’t put it on the note I left you,” I say quietly, pushing my rice around with my fork.
“Well, maybe… maybe now that I’m here, we can… get to know each other? The right way?” His voice is hopeful and his eyes shine with sincerity as he looks at me.
I can’t stop the smile on my face. “I would like that.”
Maybe… maybe this could work. We could talk, get to know each other like normal people, maybe go on a date or two… and then I’ll tell him about his secret baby. Like a normal person.
Right.
“You know, you could give me your number now.” He grins sheepishly. “Better late than never, right? I won’t hold the tardiness against you.”
Heat flashes through my body at his words, the memory of what he said to me at the bar on our first night together filling my mind.
“So tell me, Ella. If I say that you’re my weakness, will you hold it against me?”
He smirks, as if reading my thoughts. I nod wordlessly, taking his phone from him and typing in my number. I hit call so I have his number too.
Just then, Liam’s phone goes off, and I quickly hand it back to him. His eyes scan the screen and he curses. “Shit. There’s an emergency, and they need me back at the ER.”
“That’s okay, I have to go back to work too.” I nod, pulling out my wallet to take out my debit card.
Liam shakes his head as he stands up. “Don’t worry about it, Ell. I got it.” He pulls a hundred-dollar bill from his wallet and puts it on the table. My eyes widen at the little slip of paper. Who carries around hundreds? Not to mention, I highly doubt our lunch was anywhere near that amount. That server is about to get a hefty tip. If it wasn’t rude to ask about wages, I’d question how much he makes over at the hospital to be able to afford to throw money around so nonchalantly. I’ve always been raised to be very fiscally responsible, and even my brothers, who have hit it big with their SasS2 company, don’t drop money like this.
“Thanks for lunch,” I tell him as we walk to the front of the restaurant. “I’d love to come here again sometime.”
He pushes the front door open for me to walk through. “Any time. Though, I’m pretty annoyed that our lunch got cut short, and you had to drive thirty minutes just to get here. When can I see you again?”
“Why don’t you text me and find out?” It feels good to be a little flirty with him.
“Hmm. You might regret saying that. I’ve been known to blow up phones with memes and bad jokes.”
“Do your worst,” I challenge him, raising a brow. “I doubt you can come up with anything I haven’t heard before.”
“Challenge accepted.” He grins as he looks down at me before pressing a kiss to my cheek. “I’ll see you later.”
With that, he jogs to the nearby crosswalk that leads to UVM, leaving me pressing my fingers to my cheek like some kind of lovestruck idiot.
Though I wonder if I actually am exactly that.