CHAPTER ELEVEN
Nidev stood at the tall window of his quarters, peering into the swamp’s darkness. He focused on the weight of the world that pressed on his squared shoulders. For many, that burden was crushing, but for him it was an anchor that grounded him, a compass that centered him. But the context of that weight was another matter. One whose vexations came without stop, day after day, bearing weapons for which his mind had no defense. Like the shadows flickering behind him from the flame of his desk lamp, they bore the reflection of hard data but moved to the fire’s unpredictable rhythm.
That flame. Love and passion...
That fucking bite.
The Bishop’s Belle Eveque had been right. Trying to produce outcomes in their prodigy program while lacking the essence needed to do that was destined to failure. No, not lack. He’d foolishly dismissed them as distractions. Regarding strategy, using passion was a coward’s weapon in war. Men fought men. Men fought wars. Women should be nowhere near those things and to throw one in the mix for gaining advantage was no different than throwing a baby at a soldier during battle. It was a dirty, weak move, and history was littered with those.
Passion belonged in bedrooms not on battlefields or sprawled out on the tables of strategy. And yet, it was his obsession with strategy and war that became his downfall in the prodigy program. He treated the success of these unions between the gifted as a war to be conquered. And in doing so, removed the essence that would have led them to victory.
Love and passion.
Now it was his turn. Those words, those weapons were being handed to him. His problem with it had nothing to do with committing, he possessed godlike powers with such things. It was that he had zero knowledge about such love and passion. But seeing that it existed and thrived between the Marsh Kings and their women verified it was real. They were not using love and passion as a weapon or tool but becoming one with them. He might have thought it was restricted to their culture, but he watched with his own eyes as Rukem dared to challenge this missing key and ended up falling madly in love. A bullet and a chamber. Wood and flint. Paper and pen. Lock and key. Once joined, the power of the two unleashed a new power, directed by whatever the wielder wished. And that was the real phenomena. The power that tore down entire empires was also able to build them.
And he needed this power. Now, not later. Which brought him to the set of weights burning through his muscle and straining his bones. Finding the perfect match while navigating the flames of that fucking bite.
His cock twitched at the mere mention of it, attempting to scatter his thoughts to the ends of the earth. He could surely not be defeated by this power while remaining strictly aware of the countless great warriors taken out by it. But, everything was a potential weapon. This was no different. He’d hone it, find every advantage it offered. So far, the bite had given his gifts a razor’s edge, tripling his cognitive strengths. Could this serve as an optional catalyst for those who preferred celibacy? He surely intended to learn that very thing. The state of the world was not open armed to vulnerable connections. Those things a man would die to protect were prime leverage for his enemies.
He’d barely subdued the monster in his cock enough he could function around females without scents or sounds throwing him into the flames of instant obsession. The idea to cancel his monthly mentorship meeting with Lyric had hardened his resolve. That was precisely what he couldn’t allow to happen. His cock interfering with his duties and responsibilities to the students at the academy. Especially as the leader. Lyric was a great first test since she faithfully kept things very professional.
He slowly crossed his arms over his chest, and closed his eyes, meticulously regathering all his data and firmly anchoring it by category onto his strategy board.
The students.
The Quantum Kings.
The Marsh Kings.
The nuns.
The burning world.
The coming war.
That damned prophecy.
His brothers.
The necessity of marriage.
Finding the perfect match.
The expected knock on his door flung all his pieces into a mental wall as he made his way to the entrance, pausing at the door and gathering himself until his mind was a rigid, impenetrable fortress.
He opened the door, bracing for the onslaught of temptations.
“Mr. Nidev!”
Lyric’s joy bomb obliterated the usual lust storm as she flew past him into his apartment. As he shut the door, he paused when his lust countered the attack and captured her scent.
In that second, he knew. He’d made a big mistake.
As he glanced back at her, it was instantly confirmed. He’d forgotten just how beautiful she was. Her attire was always respectful but that definition took a very nasty turn. Fitted blue jeans hugged her voluptuous shape and that tucked in black satin blouse was just loose enough to showcase more voluptuous perfection. The black heeled boots topped it off, making this more than just a mistake, it was a fatal error. And there was no turning back, even if he wanted to and he surely didn’t.
He turned the lock on the door and shoved the thoughts into the mental cage he’d built for public warfare. All the lusty offspring his monster produced were put there with the promise of dealing with them later. He wasn’t sure yet if this appeasement was also feeding them—that remained to be learned.
“Long time no see! You look great as usual, but don’t you always?”
“It’s good to see you too,” he chuckled, as she launched into her usual updates while his lust filter dissected and translated at a frenzied pace. Nidev realized that by allowing this odd filter to operate, he could use it as an informant. Not for the females but for his enemy. By allowing it to have its way on a leash, he gained insight into said ways. As she went on in great exuberance, the filter broke off into layers. Her smell. The silky sounds in her voice. The taste of her words. The meaning of her body language. And a final filter for her gift .
“And that’s about it.” She clasped her perfectly manicured hands before her, capping her month-long dissertation with one of her signature smiles. The one she poured all her heart and soul into. He’d always liked it but now he was officially fighting a hostile obsession with it. “And what have you been up to? Working on your moon tanning? I can see you’re still working out.”
Nidev rose from the couch, needing to put distance between them when the filters compiled and gave him a final read out on his star student. Her lust levels were maxed out. All filters read her at one hundred percent aroused and turned on. “Would you care for something to drink?” he asked at the fridge, certain that read out was wrong.
“Sure, I’ll take a water.”
He grabbed two and made his way back, handing her one. As far as he could remember, Lyric was just being Lyric. But then… how would he know if he’d deliberately kept all such signs tuned out so as not to be distracted. And if she’d always behaved this way, what did that mean? She’d been lusting for him for over four years? Nonsense. Or was this her natural exuberance, her passion for life? Joy? Was the filter counting all forms of lust? Including lust for living?
He’d have to somehow test that.
“So, seriously, how are you?” she demanded again, digging through her leather satchel, and whipping out a paper. “There’s a lot of rumors going round,” she sang, eyeing him with a smile that got labeled as seductive. No, he countered. Sweet. She crossed the distance and handed it to him. “Guess who drew that?”
His gaze quickly gulped down the tanned silk peeking through the top of her black satin blouse before he looked at the penciled drawing. “Uhhh a resurrected Picasso?”
“Right? Julian did it. He wanted you to have it. I may brag about you,” she whispered, the scent of her perfume coupled with her whisper feeding every demon inside him.
She laughed as she returned to the chair too far away and not far enough. She’d mentioned rumors. Exactly what he wanted to know. But first he wanted to address what she hid in her soft mocha eyes. His gifts were all over that. “Maybe tell me about the shadows you’re hiding behind that blinding light in your eyes.”
She went suddenly serious and then covered her face and flopped back onto the couch. The little sound of defeat in her throat brought a celebration to his cock as if it counted it as a point. If this lust got off to victories, he’d be in a real fix since conquering all challenges was his prime passion.
“It’s about Julian.”
A spark of concern entered the playing field. “Is he okay? ”
“I’m just worried about him.” She looked down at her hands as the terrors of their reality bled through her words. “They closed all the schools and Bob lost his job.”
He sensed she had a question. “Ask me what you need from me. You know I will always help you if it’s in my power to.”
She slowly leaned forward, face cast down as she offered him a tiny smile. “Thank you, Mr. Nidev, for always caring about me. Not one single nice thing you’ve done for me has ever gone unnoticed and unappreciated. And I would be so thrilled to take on extra work during these crazy times—”
“Ask me, Lyric.”
She paused and released a breath. “What are the odds that we could bring my brother here to live with me? I have savings—”
“Yes. We can and will get your brother. Are your parents okay with this?”
She nodded, making her shiny black curls bounce while more shadows loomed. “I told them that I would send them money and like I said I have savings I’ll use, and you know I’m a hard worker, I’m happy to take extra—”
Her words froze when he silenced her with a hand. “You are still a student at this academy and my responsibility. ”
Her face softened as she pled, “With all due respect Mr. Nidev, I’m twenty-five years old. I can be an asset to the academy.”
“Age is irrelevant, you know this. And you already are a great asset to this institution.”
She stared at him, her eyes softening more with a small smile. “Alright, Mr. Nidev. You’re the boss. Whatever you decide I will happily respect.”
“We will ensure your parents are taken care of as long as it’s within our power to do that. Anything else you fear bringing to me?”
Again, she covered her face, but this time with a laugh before lowering them. “What I would give to have your gifts.”
“You do have a great deal of my gifts with your voice.”
She gave a small shrug of her shoulder. “Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have no voice at all.” Her wide-eyed confession caught him off guard.
“Why?” It was the standard mentor thing to ask but he genuinely wanted to hear her speak the answer.
She watched herself lace and unlace her fingers. “It gets tiring.”
The new, vulnerable emotion interested him. “How so?”
“Maybe…” She looked off to the right. “I don’t like always causing things in people.” She br ought a sweet smile back to him. “Maybe I wonder if I would just… stop existing in people’s minds if I didn’t have that stupid power.”
He highly doubted that. “Then learn how not to use it.”
She stilled in utter surprise before the hint of a smile threatened. “Mr. Lore would have your head on a platter if he heard you say that.”
He allowed a grin. “That’s why I’m your mentor and not your teacher. I’m here to help you solve real world problems.”
She gave a snort and eye roll. “It’s not exactly real -world problems.”
“They are your problems, and they are real, and you are in the world, and you are important. Real important world problems.”
She sobered and lowered her gaze when tears filled them. “Sorry, I…” She wiped them quickly and the sight of her in weakness became an instant turn on. “I never cry!” Her tears continued and he watched in aroused fascination as she attempted to gather herself and fail. “My God what is wrong with me, I’m so sorry,” she gasped, a sob escaping.
Nidev struggled between the right thing to say and studying the affects her odd behavior had on this lust disease. “Crying is healthy,” he defaulted. “And a sign of inner strength.”
“Oh really,” she doubted. “You cry? ”
“No,” he said, smiling at the laugh she belted out.
“That’s what I thought.”
“For a woman it’s…” Hmmm. Normal was no longer accurate. More like… “Beautiful.”
Again, she froze, her glittery shocked eyes aimed at him before she filled the air with another laugh. “If that came from any other mouth, it wouldn’t be so dang funny,” she said, those earlier lingering shadows returning.
“You still have things to say to me.”
She shot off the couch at that and paced before it. He felt like he was watching porn as his gaze followed every curve, stamping each angle with a bold Perfection.
“It’s Zack,” she finally said.
His eyes rose at hearing the problem weighing. “What about Zack?”
She stopped pacing and faced him with both hands up, fingers spread wide as she seemed to hold her breath. “He has a crush on me,” she gushed. “I see it and I think he thinks I don’t see it and… I don’t know how to handle it and need your help.” She quickly sat now, holding his gaze.
Zack having a crush on her was not a shock. What was more interesting was why that was hard for her to tell him. “Are you sure it’s a crush?”
She nodded a lot. “I have experience with them. I know what they look like. ”
Interesting. How did she have experience? “Why was that so hard for you to tell me?” he decided to ask first.
“Because I think he needs another mentor, and I don’t want you to think I’m just quitting something.”
He threw out the necessary, “And why do you think this?”
“Because it’s only going to get worse. The more kind I am to him, the more he’ll fall in love and the harder it’ll be for him. I just don’t want to hurt him, he was one of my first friends when I got here and I found out he was hurt he wasn’t picked for my prodigy pairing,” she added with a wide-eyed nod.
He was stuck on her knowing so well how those things worked. “What sort of experience do you have with this?”
Her brows furrowed with a weird smile as she wagged him off. “Just… normal schoolgirl crush stuff.”
Had she liked Lore? “This school?” he asked, realizing it could have been prior.
She smacked her hands in her lap, chastising him with her gaze. “It’s irrelevant. Besides, every girl in this school has crushes on all of the Kings.”
Which King? And why was this information life and death to him suddenly? “I’m entirely unfamiliar with this concept. ”
“You’re unfamiliar with the concept of a crush ,” she clearly highly doubted.
“Not the term, just the experience.”
She nodded. “That makes sense. You have that hard-ass shield blocking such nonsense from the earliest of ages.”
“Really,” he said, mildly surprised. “And how do you know this?”
The sly smile she gave wrapped itself around his cock. “Because I did a report on you. We had to pick a King and since you were my Mentor, I picked you. Two birds with one stone.”
A report on him. “How did you come by your information?” he asked, ready to have a discussion with whoever gave it.
“Several of the Kings were happy to help.”
“I’m sure,” he said, already guessing exactly which ones.
“But it was just basic information. Backstory type stuff. Place of birth, family, major life events, standard stuff. I know you trained your ass off and earned every single thing you’ve accomplished. Hence, you’re my hero.”
Cute. But what was this strained nonchalance about her trying to tell him? Why did she really pick him? Now he also wanted to know why she’d picked him for her Mentor. They weren’t permitted to ask but he was permitted to obtain information in other ways. “So, you picked the boring King for a quick assignment.”
This time when she laughed, it brought a new label. Lust with a heat signature. And what did that mean? He couldn’t find out fast enough. “There is nothing boring about you Mr. Nidev. And I never pick easy assignments. I found you to be the most interesting.”
“And that alone is interesting.”
Another heat signature laugh. “You’re the quietest. And mysterious. I guess call me nosy.”
She was withholding so much it was nearly lying. “Sorry to disappoint,” he murmured, opening his water, and taking a swig.
“ That you did not do. You didn’t know I did a report?” she asked, surprised. Fishing.
“I did not,” he said, closing his water.
“You want to know what I loved most about my findings?”
Loved. He very much did but he took a moment to consider. “Seems I actually do.”
Another seductively hot laugh. “The way you lost your hair and why you got that tattoo. I think it’s the most badass thing I’ve ever heard. And I know you’re not allowed to ask about why students pick Mentors but, I picked you because you represented everything I wanted to be. Strong. Fearless. Sharp. Merciless in perfection. I needed that. And you did not disappoint. ”
He angled his head, trying to decipher the thing she kept leaving out. He did disappoint her, but not about that. Did it have to do with the prodigy academy? “What about with the prodigy academy? How’d I do there?”
The wreck of emotions on her lovely face was captivating.
“Really,” he said in mild surprise at the display, getting more of it with a vigorous nod.
“You sucked. George was the worst person. For me,” she corrected. “Whatever algorithm or fancy formula you all used for that glitched on us.”
He recalled her reasons for asking to cancel the contract. “I believe you said he was too weak for father material on the dissolution form.”
“Among other things,” she barely said.
“I don’t recall more.”
“Because I didn’t put it,” she confessed with a mix of frustration and guilt. “Look… George was nice enough,” she said. “A real go-getter. He tried very hard to make that arrangement work and so did I, but in the end it wasn’t enough. And honestly, I didn’t realize why at the time.”
That brought a dozen need to know answers. “George ticked off all the boxes that made him a thousand percent husband and father material.”
“And I’m not saying he isn’t going to make a great father and husband, just not to me. And I’m willing to say that I was the wrong pick for him. ”
He was only puzzled more. “What did you mean when you said he was too weak for father material?”
More guilt came as her gaze meandered. “Mr. Nidev, I didn’t even know at the time how to put it into words. Writing isn’t my strong suit and I sure as hell wasn’t going to voice it.”
His cock was officially fascinated. “Everything that’s said here, stays here. Legally,” he reminded, ready for every detail.
The worry on her face wavered a little. “You can’t ever tell him I said this.”
He acknowledged with a single nod, and she took a deep breath.
“I realize now that poor George was doomed from the start with the way the whole class was set up to disregard women’s feelings and needs. The ones that go beyond being a prodigy factory.”
The crude yet accurate description of timeless hours and planning for that promising empire stung.
“I literally was not allowed to want more than what I was told I should so that’s one reason you never heard a word about it. For the first two years, I strived to be what the curriculum outlined a wife was to be. And when needs arose that didn’t line up with the curriculum, I mostly kept it to myself.”
“Mostly? ”
“I made the mistake of telling George and of course he saw me as flawed but also wanted to help me because he’s really a sweet man.”
“So, he helped meet this… mysterious need?”
Head shake. “If he had, I might still be with him. He tried to help me get rid of the need since it was deemed by the curriculum to be secondary which amounted to unnecessary.”
What the hell was she referring to? “Exactly what is this need?” he gently asked.
She was suddenly at the edge of some cliff, and he’d just asked her to jump.
“You don’t have to answer,” he reminded.
“Pleasure,” she forced out. “I wanted pleasure in prodigy production.”
He was truly confused and aroused out of his fucking mind that they were speaking such words. “Coitus is pleasurable for male and female.”
Shame flashed over her face before she lowered it. “Which meant something was wrong with me and I didn’t want that getting out either. So, I just… pretended I enjoyed it for as long as I could, until I couldn’t.”
“There’s nothing wrong with you,” he assured, despising his stupidity more than ever. “The program was faulty. If anybody was flawed it was the Kings. We know this now.”
She aimed sympathetic dark eyes at him. “We can all claim ignorance in that regard. I for one had no idea that every woman has different needs and different ways of getting them met. I especially didn’t know that if these needs aren’t met in a woman, she dies inside and yet goes on living.” The look of pure shock and dread on her face matched his own while he wondered who told her that?
“Have you spoken to the Belle Eveque?”
She gave a slow nod. “I did. She helped me understand so much . And you’re right, there’s nothing at all wrong with me, I’m completely normal and it’s okay to want pleasure and there are so many other ways of getting it besides coitus.”
This news came with a fresh round of brand-new chemicals. All of them obsession worthy. What sort of ways was she referring to? Masturbation? Deliciously prolonged borderline sadistic foreplay?
“I know that the Kings all meant well with the prodigy program Mr. Nidev, please don’t beat yourself up about it.”
“You do know me well,” he said, oddly not bothered.
“And I’m so happy you’re all letting Belle Eveque help with it. How could you possibly know something you have no experience in?” she reminded, her coddling only arousing him more. And why was he aroused? He’d forgotten to keep track of his little demons.
“Soooo, what about you?” she suddenly said, officially disarming him .
“Me?”
She nodded with a wince. “ Everybody’s talking about the bat bite.”
Holy fuck. “And what did you hear?”
This wince came with a layer of embarrassment. “Just that it uh… had a… private effect on all the celibate Kings.”
Holier fuck. “It’s been quite the interesting project,” he said casually.
Her brows rose with her constant little nods. “I bet. How are you holding up? Was thinking you might cancel our meeting. Not that you’d be tempted by me but because you wouldn’t want me to worry. Which I wouldn’t,” she assured, making her curls dance with the shake of her head. The onslaught of delectable cues she gave off put a steady hum in his cock.
“Glad to know that.”
“Which part?” she wondered, chewing on her lower lip, and waving her hand. “Never mind.”
“That you trust me,” he said, not wanting her to think he couldn’t lust after her. He surely could and surely was.
“I just heard you seemed to be steering clear of people. I’m glad you don’t feel the need to do that with me.”
“I feel the need to fight through whatever problems I encounter and do my job,” he said .
“Right?” she agreed, appearing half worried, but about what he wasn’t sure. “So is it like… something you can’t control or… we’re all curious about what actually is happening. Unless you can’t say,” she hurried with both hands up.
By the time he finished explaining how the bite works, her eyes were huge. “So, all your gifts are… tripled?”
He chuckled, eyeing her as he took another swig of water. “Why would this worry you? Unless you’re hiding things from me.”
Adamant head shake as she stared at him wide-eyed. Fuck, she was beautiful. He wanted his fists in those thick, silky curls,
“Are you sure about that?” he gently pressed, wishing she’d confess whatever she was still hiding.
Her hands flew up and covered her face. “It was you I had a crush on! I’m sorry, I was young, and I got over it, but I don’t want you to see it in my head somehow and think I still have it.” Her hands fell away, and her wide eyes were back on him. “I don’t have it still. I mean I care about you, and I like you as a person but that’s it,” she swiped the air sharply. “You taught me how to overcome and master my emotions and I did. And I must’ve done well, or you would’ve known all this,” she realized.
He put an arm on the back of the couch and his ankle on his knee, eyeing her. “I’m not bothered by a student’s crush, Lyric. It’s not that I couldn’t see them, I chose not to see them. That’s what my job requires.”
Had she always been this sexy and adorable? Those expressive eyes were busy connecting dots before she lowered them to her clasped hands in her lap. “Okay,” she said, the word breathless. “Good.”
“And I’m still not bothered by crushes from my students. If anything, I have more ability to ignore them.” Apparently, he could lie three times as good as well.
She flashed him the fakest smile. “Glad I’m easy to deal with. That’s what I’ve been working on being.”
He lowered his eyes when her truthful lies boiled his blood and brought his lust to a new abominable low. Or was it a high? Whichever one meant dangerous. He felt everything shifting inside him and waited eagerly to see where it ended up. There was no place it could settle he wouldn’t want. Right now, he wanted to talk more about this crush. “But I am honored to have been crushed on by you.”
“Ah,” she said, nodding, still breathless and wanting to hide. “It can be a compliment.”
“How is your boyfriend situation?”
Brief confusion then, “Oh. Non-existent still.”
“So, Patrick didn’t work out?”
“Pffft, God no. He was way too slow for me.”
“And what do you want him hurrying with? ”
“Anything! He’s sweet as can be but I knew when he was content to spend two whole hours creating shapes out of the clouds that it wasn’t going to work.”
Nidev had to chuckle. “That’s surely a five-minute task.”
“Is it even a task?” she laughed. “It was torture. And he stayed like five feet from me. I don’t think he even knows what bases are with girls.”
“So, you have a game plan for that?”
She regarded him. “For what?”
“Bases. What’s the perfect play a guy can make? Holding hands, base one. Kissing base two? What’s a homerun for you? A foul ball?”
She eyed him suspiciously. “Are you mocking me? I can’t tell.”
“No, I’m genuinely curious and ignorant on these matters as you now know.”
Her exuberant laugh cleared the way. “Holding hands, yes, first base. Second base, a kiss. Third base…” she squinted up. “A confession.”
“A confession?”
Slow, steady nod. “Declaring his intention.”
“And then?”
“And then…” She threw up her hands. “No clue! Haven’t made it to that. Obviously I’m not a virgin but I’ve never done the whole date scene.”
His demons exploded out of their cage and gnawed on the head of his dick at that announcement. Thankfully, the propped position of his leg hid his massive hard on. “Well, don’t brag, I haven’t been to any bases,” he said, bringing her beautiful laugh.
“Awww, you’re so innocent,” she teased. “Probably why I felt safe to have a crush on you. That whole celibacy thing made me brave I think.”
“I’m surprised the rumor about the Kings marrying hasn’t circulated yet.”
He watched her shock like a pervert watching sick porn. “You’re getting married?”
Getting singled out felt like his favorite candy. “That’s the plan.”
Her mouth remained in that oval as he mentally licked and sucked every inch of it. “The Kings agreed to this?”
“Rukem has already taken a wife. Vex is currently taking one. Lore is a day away from taking one.”
“King Lore?” she gasped. “ My teacher?”
“Yes. Did you have a crush on him too?”
The snap of her brows together brought his grin that he held back. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Imply I’m a slut,” she snipped. “You’re the only King I had a crush on. I learned my lesson with you very well.”
“Did you,” he mildly said, putting both arms on the back of the couch. Her gaze lowered to his chest, and he suddenly wished it was bare to receive such a look.
“And what about you? When are you marrying?”
“When I find a wife. My perfect match.”
She gave a rude snort. “I highly doubt she exists.”
He chuckled, pinching the bridge of his nose as he watched her. “Ouch, I guess.”
She leaned back and crossed her legs, and his mind got busy mapping out the shape of her ass where it met the leather. He was suddenly in a memory at the pool, with her storming off after he’d reprimanded her for something. He’d intentionally removed his eyes from her furious exit, but that one-piece swimsuit buried between her ass cheeks was clear as day in that second. As he allowed himself to stare at it in the memory, he realized. She had the most voluptuous ass.
“It really kind of irks me,” she decided, crossing her arms over her chest, oblivious to the jut she forced on the satin mounds. “How are you supposed to marry a woman with your level of dick-tation to your job? No woman will put up with that.”
“Dictation?”
“Dick slash tation. Your commitment to being Captain Hard ass about everything you put your mind to. ”
“You think I can’t be dedicated to my job and obsessed over my wife at the same time?”
Mmm, he loved knocking her on her knees. She finally rolled her eyes, throwing an arm at him. “I guess you could, anal as you are. Which is one of the strengths I borrowed from you to get over that silly crush and squash all the emotions wanting to define my every step. And once I was free of that, I was able to become. Do you have prospects for a wife? Or are you using your standard tried and truly dumb methods. Orrrrrr, did you and the Kings build some kind of something to locate her.”
“One of the Marsh Kings is working with King Thakx on a program that would allow us to find a perfect match,” he said, grinning at how much her feisty side aroused him.
She gave him a ‘ These dumb ass fools’ head shake. “Y’all just don’t learn.”
“I’m trying to marry last,” he said, giving her a little more rope to play with.
“You don’t want to marry?” She seemed to forget he was reading her every expression three dimensionally, thankfully. Right now, she’d just told him exactly what he wanted to know. She wanted time. Hopefully, time to seduce him.
“Not at all,” he said.
“Then why are you?” she demanded incredulous.
“Because I agreed and I’m the leader. ”
She leaned her body to the right now with more head shaking, like her brain didn’t know how to unpack this level of stupidity. “Well, I can tell you that love doesn’t like to be strategized,” she informed with a quick finger point. “It doesn’t want to be penned into the calendar or entered into an equation.” Two more finger points. “And nobody wants a man that needs reminders, they want a man that can’t forget.” She pointed all her fingers at him with that one.
He didn’t hold back his smile. “Duly noted, Miss Lyric.”
“Duly noted,” she muttered. “Have you ever even been on a single date?”
“Maybe I have other plans in mind.”
She quirked her brow, managing to be both curious and accusing. “Like?”
“Well, these marriages are supposed to be unlocking my gifts. But this bat bite has already done that. What exactly will this marriage be for besides adding more casualties for the war coming?”
“But you agreed to marry you said.”
“Not everybody defines marriage the same.”
She stared at him, confused. “Wait… exactly what part of this bat bite helped you unlock your gifts?”
That was the question of the hour, wasn’t it? “I’m not really sure,” he half lied .
“Well, if there’s a way to be sure, I would find it,” she advised.
“I’m not aware of one,” he admitted, opening the field for advice.
“So, what will you do?” she wondered, leaning forward with her forearms on her legs, back to his concerned helper.
“About what?”
“About getting out of marrying? Figuring out which is unlocking your gifts, the bite or the… lust from it? And will this condition always be with you? What if it’s not and then you lose those upgrades, and the carriage turns back into a pumpkin?”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “That’s a very strange expression.”
“Cinderella!” she cried. “The… never mind. What if you lose it, then what?”
He considered that, then looked at her. “I’m hungry, would you care to stay for dinner?”
The question threw her, and she looked at her watch. “You’re eating late.”
He stood and went to the kitchen. “It’s been a crazy couple of weeks.”
“Sure, if you want me to.”
“I do,” he said, opening the fridge. “I need your help.”
“With what?” she asked, entering the kitchen and sitting at the small island.
“With this dilemma, of course. How about a fried egg sandwich?”
“Oh. Yum. Sure.”
“You mind if I take a five-minute shower first?”
“Not at all. In fact, I can make the sandwiches while you do that. You got me hungry.”
“Perfect,” he said, setting everything on the counter for her. “You know where everything is.”
“Yes, go. My kitchen is nearly identical to yours.”
“Thank you. See you in five.”
Nidev hurried to the shower and turned it on to steaming hot as he ripped off his clothes. He entered and set the water flow to hammer and unhooked the shower head, sitting with it. He moved to the edge of the seat and opened his legs, aiming the thumping water at the head of his cock and balls while stroking himself and finally unleashing some of the fantasies burning him alive. “Oh fuck,” he gushed, rolling his hips nice and slow just like he’d done in his mind while fucking her mouth. His heightened gifts allowed him to nearly feel her throat pushing on the head of his cock. So. Fucking. Good. And so. Fucking. Bad.
He’d never allowed himself this far into the flames. But he needed to know what waited down at the bottom of it. He needed its very worst. Craved the hottest part. There was no denying that or finding a way to have it. As long as it was this. Him in his shower fantasizing things he had no business fantasizing. With her. Yes, her . That fucking glorious bite . It turned him inside out. He didn’t know this person he was. What if she was right? What if it would pass? He didn’t care about losing the gifts, he cared about losing the lust. They needed to fix this. Living as this psychotic human was impossible. He just needed to survive the ride. Because he was surely going to ride it. Every day, every night, just like this. He’d come in that shower and relive every sadistic wrong fantasy he’d had about her.
He braced a foot on the tiled wall, opening his legs more as he strangled the shower head like he did the fist of hair in his fantasy. Fuck it was like silk. And she loved it like he did. He was going insane. Nobody could fucking know what was going through his head. Especially her. And yet already strategic obsession coursed through his veins. He knew it too well not to recognize it. This lust was now a battlefield. And she would serve as his opponent. It wanted to stalk her. Hunt her. Prey on her. She’d had a crush on him. She had pleasure needs. And as soon as he was done, he’d go out there in only his flannels and find that out. To help George of course. While creating more wicked fantasies right in front of her pretty face. His orgasm surged just at the idea and detonated like a dirty bomb, splintering his mind in a million burning pieces .
Fuck yes, he would surely do it.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Lyric was literally trembling as she went through the motions of feeling normal. Just cooking egg sandwiches in Mr. Nidev’s kitchen at ten o’clock at night. Nothing to see here. What was going on? With him? And her? And them? There was something happening, but she wasn’t about to read into anything after that horrifically embarrassing crush confession.
Did you?
She dropped the spatula on the floor. “Shit,” she gasped, snatching it up and hurrying to the sink while listening to the shower going. God, him in the shower. She was melting. Not once had she been interested in him in the last four years and in the span of thirty minutes she was ready to jump him. Damn his cryptic ways. He was so good at reading everybody and hiding himself. He needed help with his dilemma. How, exactly? If he asked her to help him learn how to date or some dumb crap, she’d die. Again.
She scooped the perfect eggs out of the pan and gingerly set each one on the prepared bread slices. The shower shut off and blasted her panic through her blood. Just be normal. It’s a normal meeting, just like all the ones before. She’d even eaten there before which meant she was likely overreading everything.
“I think they came out great,” she called, looking for glasses in the cabinet and grabbing two. “I hope you like the yoke runny,” she added, ripping two paper towels from the role.
“I love my yoke runny.”
She spun around then spun right back to the counter with wide eyes. “Well good then.” He had no shirt on. Oh dear God. She turned with his plate and handed it to him. “Would you like a drink?” She turned to the fridge and opened it. His skin was still wet. His muscles were godlike. And he smelled like a forest raped by a violent thunderstorm. She’d only seen him without a shirt once at the pool by accident. That one accident had accompanied many of her orgasms.
“Looking for something specific?”
Her cheeks went up in flames as she snatched the juice. “Right in my face,” she said, shutting it.
“Mmm, this is perfect,” he said as she forced herself not to hurry and look as nervous as she was.
“So about your dilemma,” she said, needing to jump right into a topic she could zero in on. She sat at the only other chair across from his at the small island, focusing on her plate and purpose.
“Yes. I need a savior,” he said, his voice a low rumble through her body. “Mmmm, you’re good at this.”
She couldn’t take hearing him make those noises. And if she were being normal, she’d have no problem looking at him. “Glad you like it,” she said, forcing her head up. “I have a lot of practice with eggs. It’s all we ate growing up.” She hurried back to staring at her plate, wondering how she was supposed to eat and not get sick. And how was he so calm? Because he wasn’t interested. As usual. Focus on the problem. Which was another problem! It involved the lust. He’d been vague about that part. Maybe it was just like… temptations of some kind. How would she advise without knowing these particulars? How would she ask? Treat it like he is. Like it’s nothing.
“So, I realized,” she said casually while covering her mouth with a hand, working on her bite. “I might need specifics about that issue you have if I’m going to actually help you figure something out.”
“Which issue?”
Yep. Oblivious. This was nothing to him. “The uh, bite issue. The part that doesn’t triple your gifts.”
“The lust.”
Lust. “That’s a… pretty specific word.” And damn dirty .
“But extremely accurate,” he said, sliding his plate to the side.
Oh crap he was done? She wasn’t going to eat while he watched. “You know what, I’m not good at talking and eating,” she confessed, sliding her plate over as well then crossing her hands on the counter. “So, this lust,” she hurried, forcing her gaze to his because that’s what an unbothered helpful student did. “Can you describe it? Break it down to me clean. Second grade level.” Hold his stare, hold it, do not break eye contact.
She nearly gasped in relief when he crossed his arms on the counter and angled his head off to the right. “It starts as a spark. Deep inside.” He brought his gaze to hers and dear God she was trapped in it. “It’s sharp and electric, but quickly spreads through my veins like liquid fire. The moment I’m around a woman, that spark surges, transforming into a blaze. Every glance, every breath she takes, fuels the fire until it becomes a relentless inferno. My senses sharpen—the smell of her skin, the sound of her voice, the way she moves—everything intensifies, pushing the heat higher and higher. And this firestorm in my body doesn’t just burn, it demands release, building with every second until it feels like it’ll tear me apart from the inside. It forces me into a dark hole where I have to release it. But the reprieve is fleeting. Just long enough to catch my breath before the smoldering begins again, waiting to ignite once more.”
She snapped her mouth shut realizing he was done. Her eyelids fluttered with the effort to pull herself out of the flames he’d dragged her through. “Wow,” she gasped, reaching for her juice, staring at the cup for several disturbed seconds. She realized it wasn’t just arousal flooding her body but… jealousy. He said all that about what he experienced around women so easily. Like he experienced none of that with her at all. “For one, you surely can’t be doing this sort of thing with every woman.”
“Doing? Did you not hear anything I just said?”
She needed air and a reason to get away from his sudden direct, hot stare. She downed her juice and brought her glass to the sink. Her hands shook as she turned on the water and rinsed her dish, needing some of that on her face. And body. She suddenly froze. Had he… released in the shower?
Visions of him jacking off caused her to drop the glass. “Shit.”
“Tell me, Lyric. Which woman should I be doing these things with?”
She shut the water off. “Obviously I don’t know that.” She ripped a paper towel from the roll and dried her hands. Still shaking. She glanced back at him on the stool, stealing a look at his magnificent body in those black flannel pants. His back was also covered in tattoos. “Is there a woman at the school you have any interest in at all that you would consider for…”
“Using her to appease my lust demon? Because that’s all I want to do. I don’t want to marry. I just want to feed this until I can get rid of it, even while knowing I’ll die trying to keep it.”
The weight of his dilemma gave her enough courage to return to her seat. “You just need to find somebody who understands what’s happening. But I’m afraid you won’t be able to use any woman in such a way. It’s not right.”
“I know that,” he admitted too easily. “And still, I want it.”
She got caught in his intense gaze, realizing what his nonchalance meant. It meant he might be experiencing those lust symptoms with her. Was he burning, wanting… things with her? “Are you… okay?”
Dumb question. He was clearly not okay. But he confirmed it with a slow shake of his head. It should’ve terrified her, but she felt more electrified at what was happening than scared. What she hoped was happening.
She took a couple of steadying breaths. “Do you… need me to leave?”
He stared so hard at her she couldn’t breathe. His gaze finally slid down to the counter. “No,” he finally said .
She’d never seen him in such a condition. The leader, trapped with nobody to turn to. “I want to help you, but… I don’t know how,” she confessed, breathless.
Another agonizing span of silence passed. “I just… have one question for you.”
Oh dear God. What question? “Okay.”
He slowly raised his gaze, and she fought to remain perfectly still. “What kind of pleasure did you need so much, that you ended your arrangement when you didn’t get it?”
Oh Jesus. Mouth bobbings began. “I can’t… I can’t say it.”
“Is it something a man would do to you?”
She swallowed and barely managed a nod.
“He does it with part of his body?”
Oh double Jesus he was going to narrow it down!
Just answer him. It was a sex class, practically. Academics.
Another nod.
“With his hand?”
She closed her eyes, panting on shallow breaths as she shook her head, the silence dragging her through an awkward shame.
“His cock?”
Her gasp flew out at the hot way he said that word. Again, she shook her head, unable to open her eyes now, ready to get to the end of whatever was happening.
“His lips and tongue,” he stated in a soft hunger. “On your pussy.”
Oh my God. She was dizzy. Was she falling? The room was falling.
“Is that it?”
She forced a nod as her heart hammered against her chest bone.
“Thank you,” he barely said.
The sound of the fridge startled her, and she opened her eyes to him grabbing a water. She quietly inhaled and exhaled three measured breaths, eyeing his massive body while she sat locked up and frozen on that stool. He turned and drank the water, his throat muscles contracting as he sucked on the bottle ‘til it was all gone. Then he looked at her.
“Seems like talking about it to you has somehow helped it.” He walked to the trash and tossed the water bottle into the recycle bin. “Do you think you might be willing to provide more of that?”
Holy crap.
“H-here?” she asked, not meaning to gasp it so loudly.
“We can try it on the phone. I’m willing to pay you any sum of money.” He returned to the island, his direct, intense gaze crippling her mind. “Please don’t take that the wrong way. I’m just… desperate. ”
Oh mercy, that was some kind of admission for him. She remembered who she was talking to. The man who would do anything to help her and always had. “Of course I will,” she said, clearing the crack from her voice. “I’m sorry you’re going through this,” she thought to say. “It sounds… truly horrific.”
He angled his head at her. “I wish it was horrific. I gave you the dark side of this lust. You should hear the other side of it.” She was riveted again as he took a seat and locked his gaze on her. She wasn’t going to survive this. “That spark I mentioned?” he began, ready or not. “That surge of energy that lights up every part of me, filling my veins with fire? It’s fucking exhilarating.” Holy shit, he cussed. He never cussed. “It’s sharp as a razor, vibrant with insanity. It’s so painfully good I want to be devoured and obliterated by it . And when I finally let it come, this monster of fire tears through me, shreds every nerve in my body with a savage ecstasy. And I… revel in the obliteration,” he whispered. “I crave the aftermath of this twisted, fucked up massacre of my humanity. I know you can’t truly understand it and part of me is so very sorry for you while another part of me, a part growing smaller every day, is so very relieved that you have no. Real. Clue.”