Chapter TwentyNine
The rest of the Christmas holiday went without incident.
Penny woke the entire house at the crack of dawn on Christmas morning, screaming with excitement when Frederic revealed the bundle of presents Santa left under the tree. Her excitement and sheer innocent joy was palpable.
Everyone was in high spirits.
Even Frederic cracked a couple of smiles. Though they were solely reserved for his daughter, it was still nice to see him in a different light.
Who would have thought the ice-man himself was capable of showing any warmth?
The entire Dade family went out of their way to make the day as special as possible for Penny. Presents, never-ending helpings of food and drink, games, and plenty of stories about her grandsons that Florence was bursting at the seams to share with me.
When she pulled out the photo albums, pointing out the little dark-haired boy with stormy whiskey eyes who smiled less and less as the years went by, my heart broke.
It was too easy to pinpoint when they all lost their mother.
Getting the chance to see the side of Jaxon that doted on his niece, the side that against his best efforts laughed at his younger brother’s awful jokes, and the side that went out of his way to involve me at all times—it was easy to imagine spending every Christmas with him and his family.
Jaxon by the end of our trip was a completely different man to the one who touched down in Monaco.
He scowled a hell of a lot less for a start, which, for Jaxon, was revolutionary.
It was two months after the Christmas holidays and honestly things between us were as close to perfect as they could be.
I couldn’t say the same about my own family. Flynn remained in his I’m not speaking to you phase, and my father showed no signs of improvement.
It was my saving grace that Jaxon and I were finally starting to work harmoniously together. When we arrived back in New York, he moved his work things into my office at Reynolds Regality Jewels our first day back to work.
A silent blessing. There was no coincidence that the day we started sharing one office was the same day Kerry Zhang stopped sauntering into my office and reminding me how shit everything was now that I was in charge.
Thank the heavens.
We spent our workdays playing damage control to the PR messes. Jaxon mainly dealt with the CFO and COO to try and stop share prices from plummeting further, while I did my best to ease clients’ and investors’ minds. Half the time, I didn’t know what the hell I was doing. If it weren’t for Jaxon, the company would have died months ago.
I didn’t want to jinx it, but we were a pretty damn good team.
And it wasn’t just the office. At home, it was even better.
We ate dinner together every night, no matter how late it was, but most of the time in bed after hours of mind-bending orgasms.
After a week back home, I moved my things into his bedroom. If he needed to leave for his own business, he kept me up to date with regular messages throughout the days he was gone.
It was as if we were a real married couple.
In his absences, I missed him more than I dared to admit to his face. The whole house felt empty without him, with both me and Bell counting down the seconds until he was home again.
Though my mind tried to slow down my deepening feelings, it was impossible to miss the difference in how he looked at me. He went out of his way to touch me whenever he got a chance, placing gentle kisses on the top of my head and on my lips in public, and completely ravaging every part of me when we were alone at night.
Against my own advice, I knew I was falling deeper in love with each passing day.
I knew I was in serious trouble the morning he announced he needed to go to Dubai for a week.
“A whole week?” I pouted. “Can’t Frederic go?”
Jaxon stood shirtless at the end of the bed. Adonis tattooed body that was impossible to get sick of looking at. Thick veiny arms. The trail of hair running from his bellybutton to his boxers that all I wanted to do was run my tongue down. Broad chest and shoulders that were able to handle my nails digging into them as he brought me to orgasm over and over.
And it wasn’t just his body that I found myself obsessing over. It was his dimples. His laughter. His dry sense of humor. His attentiveness to detail. His dislike for anyone touching him but me. His ability to make me feel like I was the only woman for him.
Damnit, he was the whole package and then some.
He shook his head. “He has meetings with his lawyers that he can’t risk avoiding, not when Penny’s mother is looking for any chance to get full custody.”
I didn’t know Penny’s mother personally. She never showed during Christmas, despite Florence’s open invitation. How Jaxon and his family spoke about her—it was easy to draw conclusions that her best interests lay in Frederic’s wallets and not with her daughter.
My judgment was possibly blinded by only hearing one side of the story. But even Olivier, the man who didn’t have a bad word to say about anyone, was unable to hide his dislike for the woman.
“There’s nothing you need me to stay for, is there?” he asked.
There were plenty of things I wanted him to stay for.
Being around him was like coming up for fresh air while drowning.
I love my temporary husband.
I’m in love with my one-year-fake-husband.
I was totally and utterly fucked.
“Everything at work is finally back on track,” I said. “I’m sure that I can handle everything while you’re gone, or who knows? I might fuck it all up, and you’ll come back to the place in ruins.”
“I have faith in you. It’s only for a week.” Jaxon dipped down and placed a whisper of a kiss on the curve of my mouth. “Try not to miss me too much, ma douceur.”
“Like a hole in the head,” I teased, turning to catch his lips with mine. A rumble emitted from the depths of his chest as my tongue swept along his bottom lip. “I have plenty of things to keep me occupied while you’re gone.”
His eyes darkened. “Like what?”
Butterflies burst to life. “I am pretty sure my vibrator is around here somewhere.”
“Ah.” He adjusted his boxers, the swell of his hardening cock stealing all the moisture from my mouth. “If you insist on using such a thing in my absence, I have one condition.”
“What’s that?”
“Ring me. I don’t care what time of the day it is, or if I am in a meeting. I want to hear it,” he smirked. “I want to hear how desperately needy you are. How you couldn’t be a good girl and wait one week without me. Ring me and let me hear you make yourself come. Let me hear how badly you miss me.”
I swallowed hard.
Jesus Christ. No matter how often he said such toe-curling things to me, my mind still short-circuited.
Like I said before, the man was the whole damn package.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” I tried to keep my voice level.
“Good,” he smirked. “My flight leaves this afternoon. If you need me for anything, and I mean anything, Evelyn, I am only a phone call away.”
“I’ll be fine. Everything is under control again. I do actually have something exciting happening this week.”
“Oh?”
“There’s a seminar I’ve been invited to through a friend I used to work with at Lilypad Press. It’s all about starting up your own business in the world of publishing, and I managed to get a ticket for it.” The tickets were gold dust. “Opening up my own publishing house has always been my dream. To be the person who opens the door for authors, who takes a chance on amazing manuscripts and gives them a voice—it’s all I want.”
Dimples punched his cheeks.
“I’m nervous but mostly excited,” I chirped. “It seems like a lifetime since I wrote anything. I miss it.”
“You’re a good writer. The articles I’ve read prove that you are more than capable of standing on your own two feet.”
“I thought you only read one of my articles?”
“There may have been a few others I glanced over. After your infamous article about me, I was intrigued to see what else you were ballsy enough to write.”
“You’re never going to let me forget that article, are you?”
“Not a chance.”
“I’d say I am sorry, but that article landed me my job.”
Pride swelled in his eyes. “You earned it.”
I grinned like a damn fool. “The thing is, we are getting closer to Flynn taking over. I’ll finally be able to walk away from it all. So, I need to start making the right steps to taking back control of my life once this is all over and done with.”
He reared back as if I slapped him. “You’re only months away from being free again.”
I reached out to take his hand. “We’ll both be free and then we can stop...”
He stepped back. “I have a suitcase to pack.”
“What’s wrong?”
Distinct familiar walls closed around him. “I’ll see you in a week.”
Watching him leave the room, my heart deflated like a balloon. It seemed like no matter how many leaps we took forward together, we were always destined to fall all the way back to the start.
“Make-up sex always works a treat.” Lola cuddled Bell in her arms. “Whatever is wrong with him won’t be a problem when you’re on top of him naked.”
“Don’t think sex is always the answer.”
Lola smirked playfully. “Always worked for me. In all my years, I haven’t come across a single problem that couldn’t be fixed by a blow job.”
“That’s the problem. I don’t know what is wrong with him.”
It was several hours after Jaxon left for the airport. I’d been torturing myself, replaying our last conversation on loop trying to figure out what went wrong, until I needed someone else to talk to. Lola arrived with a bottle of wine in hand and ready to listen.
We were denned up in the front living room, curled up on the sofa and sipping on our second bottle of red wine on empty stomachs after I told Poppy to take the night off.
“It’s like a switch with him. One second, we’re great and happy, and then the next, he shuts me out and acts like the same man I married six months ago.”
“I’d suggest trying to talk to him, but he strikes me as the suffer-in-silence type.”
I huffed a laugh. “You have no idea.”
Trying to talk to Jaxon about his feelings was like trying to talk to a brick wall.
“If he just opened up for once,” I said. “Maybe I’d be able to fix whatever is wrong. Instead, he bottles it all up and leaves me in the dark. He’s so emotionally stunted. It’s infuriating.”
Lola hummed. “Maybe it’s because he cares. I mean, if he didn’t give a shit about you, he wouldn’t have taken you to meet his family.”
“His brother and grandmother invited me.”
“He didn’t have to bring you, though,” she countered. “All I am saying is that maybe he is like this because he’s never had to express his emotions before with a woman.”
“I’m not asking for much, just a little communication like normal married couples.”
“You’re not an ordinary married couple, though. You said it yourself. Your marriage is a business transaction.”
Ouch.
I wasn’t sure if it stung because it was the truth or because I no longer looked at us that way.
“Unless something has changed?”
For me? Everything had changed. The same I wasn’t sure could be said for Jaxon.
“I thought as much,” Lola said after a few minutes of silence. “Look, we both know I am not the best for relationship advice. We’ve all seen my love life. It’s a complete fiery car wreck.” A hint of sadness crept into her laugh. “But, I guess what you need to decide is whether or not this thing between you is worth fighting for.”
“And if it isn’t?”
She scratched under Bell’s chin. “Then, in six months, you get to walk away, no strings attached. Kick his stubborn ass to the curb and file for divorce.”
I swallowed hard. Could I truly just walk away in six months and never look back? Move on with my life and pretend that the last year never happened?
“However,” Lola continued. “If it is worth fighting for, then you grab that beautiful French bastard and you tell him how you feel. You make him listen and lay it all out for him.”
“What if he doesn’t feel the same way?”
“Then fuck him. It’s his loss big time,” she said. “You can walk away without always wondering what if. So, the real question is what do you want from this?”
“I…”
The chime of the front doorbell cut me off.
I drained my wine glass and padded barefoot down to the door. Opening it, I expected to find the pizza delivery guy with dinner, instead, I found myself staring at a waking nightmare.
Laurence Larkin.