Chapter 3
Chapter three
Ra’odah
Since we’d come to the space station, I’d started spending most of my time there, because it was where I was comfortable.
I had an easier time with my microscope and my computer than I did with handsome former patients.
Or rather, I had a difficult time with other people, not with one specific man who haunted my thoughts and dreams.
I wasn’t on the schedule nearly as often as I was in the medical bay, but it was for science.
Science was fun. I certainly wasn’t there just in case Logan Tsung came in with a health problem, because that would be ridiculous.
And insane. I was a medical professional, one of the top Aunga’ri doctors in my field, and I was most definitely not insane.
It was just that it had been a few days since Logan had bothered to stop by, and I worried about him like I worried about all of my patients.
“Doctor, why don’t you head to your rooms for the day?
Taking some downtime has been proven important for productivity.
Would you like to see the most recent study?
” Crap, my supervisor had noticed my weird behavior.
I glanced up at the director of the medical staff, who was giving me a kindly smile, and shook my head.
“Just wrapping up this research and I’ll be out of your hair,” I said, trying to laugh it off, even though no one ever thought I was funny.
Logan’s file was open on my screen, just because I was checking his numbers for the thousandth time to make sure nothing was deteriorating about the gene therapy.
My supervisor nodded and started to move away, then turned back.
“Doctor An’Ra’odah,” he said, addressing me far too informally, like a human would. “I hear that we’re now being encouraged to pursue… romantic liaisons to assimilate into human culture.”
He could not be asking what I thought he was asking, could he?
The prospect of a liaison, whatever that meant, with my boss, made my stomach turn.
It wasn’t that he wasn’t handsome. But there was something about him I didn’t quite like.
He didn’t smile enough, and he never laughed.
I started to stammer my way through an excuse when a bell rang and the door to the medical offices hissed open.
I glanced up at the man walking in. Saved from a humiliating blunder by a patient. No, saved by Logan Tsung.
Logan smiled when he saw me and waved, and the director moved away, looking a little flustered, while Logan looked cheerful and laid back.
I was sure he wasn’t aware that he made me nervous, but it was impossible to ignore his beauty.
My eyes dropped to the bulge in his tight black pants.
He’d switched to a more Aunga’ri fashion, perhaps more out of necessity than choice, and the clothing accented every muscle of his body, including the parts of him I most wanted to taste.
No, must not think about putting my mouth on the patient’s cock. That was insane. I forced my eyes up, and he made eye contact and smiled.
“Hi, Ra’odah.” He was even more inappropriately informal than my boss, but I liked my informal name on his lips.
And I loved the wide smiles he always had for me.
I’d been intensely attracted to him even in his human form, but now he was taller and broader, and in my dark bedroom, when no one was around, I would imagine what it was like to be touched by his big hands.
But this was a line that should not be crossed between a doctor and her patient.
We had spent months together, and I was struggling to say neutral, but my ethical code was most important.
I had saved his life, and feelings became muddied in that instance.
He’d probably wake up in a few weeks and decide he didn’t even like me.
“Hey Doc,” he said, settling down on the examination table.
“You aren’t feeling ill, are you?” I asked.
I didn’t know what to do with my hands, so I shoved them into the pockets of my lab coat.
Logan laughed. He hadn’t lost that easy laughter that a lot of humans seemed to have, even as some other parts of his anatomy and mind had changed to be more Aunga’ri.
Perhaps his sense of humor was so ingrained in him that it could never be lost. Or perhaps his sense of humor was more cultural than biological.
He tilted his head. “I thought you might want to check my vitals, or whatever. For your records. As we do.”
“Oh. Well, you’ve been stable for weeks now.
I think you should be fine. You don’t need to come see me unless you feel something might be wrong.
” And why did saying that make me feel like I was going to vomit?
We were at a space station. We’d run into each other in the dining hall or something.
Except that I took all of my meals in the med bay or my room.
I preferred to avoid the noisy chaos of the public spaces.
Would it be worth it to see him?
He shifted, glancing down at the floor for a moment.
“Right,” he said, blowing out a quick breath.
“Admittedly, I was kind of hoping you enjoyed my company.” He winked, his brown eyes sparkling.
His eyes remained uniquely human. They were warm and expressive, and if I could stare into them without him noticing, I would do so all day.
I didn’t know what to say, as usual. That was my default mode, not knowing what to say. “I enjoy your company, like I do all my patients. But with every patient, there comes a time when I must admit they’re fully healed.”
“Ah,” he said, his gaze tracing over my face, as if memorizing it. His voice lowered a little. “How about lunch, then? Just as friends. Are we allowed to remain friends?”
Right. Like I could spend a whole meal sitting across the table from him, trying to make small talk. “I don’t think that would be a very good idea,” I squeaked. Crap, why did my voice come out all weird like that?
“All right. Message received. Well, I’ll see you around, doc,” he paused one more time as if he expected me to stop him.
I wanted to stop him, but I didn’t. So he turned and backed out of the room with a little salute.
I wanted to call him back, but I didn’t know how.
I wanted to climb into his lap and ask him to wrap his arms around me, the way Prince An’Tukka did with Logan’s sister.
He always had her snuggled so close. What would it be like to be hugged by someone like that?
The humans were so open with their affection, but that was not normal in my culture, so why was I craving it?
Because it was him, a voice inside my head whispered. Only Logan had ever made me feel like this. It was probably for the best that I’d sent him away.
Axel Mason, a human soldier, appeared in the same door Logan had exited out of, and I tried to summon a smile for him. “Can I help you, Lieutenant Mason?
He stared at me for a moment, his eyebrows pushing together. “You okay, Doc?”
“Yes. Why wouldn’t I be okay?” Behind Axel was his husband, Cix, a Vul soldier who I knew loved Axel with his entire being.
When he stopped, his tail lashed around Axel’s upper thigh, holding on tight.
They had a strange relationship, their family group, but my research told me that Aunga’ri used to bond in similar family groups, raising children together and supporting each other, as well as giving each other physical affection.
What would it be like to have two or three people who I could go to whenever I needed a hug?
Cix said nothing, just studied me, his golden eyes a little wild as always. Axel didn’t push the tail away, and I was pretty sure he loved Cix as much as the Vul loved him. As much as they both loved Mia and their prince.
“Was there something you needed?” I asked.
“You asked for the data about our bond,” Axel said, grinning, and I remembered calling him in to talk to me.
“Oh yes. Let me take samples. I believe that there may be a pheromone connection that is aiding your psychic bond. But I can’t understand how it travels such a large distance. It’s fascinating, really.”
“Like magic,” Axel said.
Cix huffed. “Magic doesn’t exist, only science you don’t yet understand.”
I laughed, finally loosening up. “Oh, I like him,” I said.
Axel glanced at Cix, his eyes warm. “Me too.”