Chapter Ten
“H urry up, Addison.” Wyatt was in the hallway of the barracks. They’d landed on US soil thirty minutes ago and were about to go home and crash. Archer gritted his teeth. If Wyatt thought Addy was going home with him, he was going to have one more thing to bitch and moan about. Sully, along with the women and children, had been immediately sent to the hospital to be checked over. The entire plane ride, Wyatt and the ambassador’s daughter continued to whine. It grated on his nerves, but they weren’t the first people to be obnoxious on a mission. Addy, on the other hand, was so fucking incredible.
He couldn’t be prouder of how she’d handled herself—not that he’d had any doubt. The empathy she had for others was boundless, starting with the way she took off her protective long-sleeved shirt for the woman who’d rescued herself, leaving Addy in nothing but a tank top. The bug spray she carried was strong, but the insects along the Itaquaí River didn’t seem to care. Some of the bites she had were the size of a quarter.
“She doesn’t need to hurry anywhere, and you don’t need to wait around.” He walked up to Wyatt, stopping a few feet in front of him.
“You might be able to go home, but Addison and I need to discuss the mission with our superior.” Wyatt wasn’t meeting his eyes, just looking over his shoulder at Addison.
Archer had given her one of his shirts. The material touched her thighs and hung over her fingertips. Fuck, he liked the look of her wearing his clothing. She had her backpack slung over one shoulder, and her blonde hair was sitting on top of her head in a messy bun. Over twenty-four hours in the Amazon and she still looked so beautiful, he wondered how in the hell he’d gotten so lucky. It wasn’t just her physical appearance that he was in awe of, though. It was every damn thing about her.
“I’m not discussing anything tonight.” She covered her mouth as she yawned. “I’m riding home with Archer.”
“Well, plan on me stopping over in the morning.” Wyatt checked his cell phone, scrolling through something on the screen. “I’ll bring coffee and croissants,” he added, looking up from the device.
“I’m not going to be home this weekend.” She stopped next to Archer, so they were hip to hip.
Christ, he hoped that meant she was going to crash at his place. What they’d seen on this mission wasn’t the worst he’d experienced during his career, but he couldn’t stop picturing Addy or his teammates’ women held against their will, and it made his stomach roll. He just wanted to hold her close. Feel the rise and fall of her breaths as they slept to reassure himself she was okay.
Wyatt looked from him to Addy and back again, like he was trying to determine the answer to the same question. Addy being in his home, a place where he’d never brought another woman, was something he’d only previously fantasized about. This woman was driving him over the edge in every way possible, and despite his earlier hesitations, he was desperate to make her his. First, though, he had to see to her other needs. A shower, food, and sleep. Then they could see where the rest of the weekend took them. If she’d changed her mind and wanted to hold off on their physical relationship, that was fine with him, too. Addy was calling the shots, and he wasn’t going to fuck this up. She stepped closer to him and slid her palm against his. Tingles shot up his arm as Wyatt’s scowl deepened.
“So, you’re with him. I thought that’s where you and I were headed, but it appears I was mistaken.”
Tension thickened the air as Addy stared at Wyatt in disbelief. Even though he was fairly sure she wanted nothing to do with her coworker, his stomach instantly hardened, and his throat felt coarse and raw.
She took one step toward Wyatt. “We’re colleagues. And I’m already seeing Archer. I’m sorry.”
Wyatt stared at her for a long moment. So long that he took a step in front of her. Finally, Wyatt turned with a shake of his head and walked stiffly out the front doors.
“I had no idea he felt that way.”
How Addy didn’t understand the depth of her appeal, he had no clue. “Does it change your mind about you and me?”
“God, no, Archer. Even if there was nothing between us, I could never picture myself with someone like Wyatt.” She lifted her hand tentatively and cupped his cheek. “I’ve never had too much interest in relationships or dating, but then I met you and I knew you were going to be important. I’ve never felt so off-kilter if I’m being honest. You make me want so many different things. Things I never even thought about.”
He dropped his chin to his chest, giving himself a moment to get a handle on his emotions. This woman. Her honesty and willingness to put her heart at his mercy was so incredibly brave and refreshing. She didn’t play games. Another thing he appreciated about her.
“I’ve been on the verge of obsession since I met you.” He lifted his hand and lightly stroked the inside of her wrist. Her palm was warm against his cheek. “I didn’t sleep at all the night your flight left for Paraguay, and many others after that.” He leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. “Are you ready to go home, sweetheart?”
She smiled, her full lips curving, lifting the apples of her cheeks. “Yes, please.” She linked her arm with his and rested her head on his shoulder for a beat as they walked into the parking lot. The night was cool for summer and so invigorating after the muggy heat of the Amazon. His skin was stiff with sweat and salt, and he couldn’t wait to wash it away. He slipped Addy’s backpack off of her shoulders as they neared his truck and put it in the back seat to give her more space. She climbed in on the passenger’s side and fastened her seat belt. Silver rounded the car, got behind the wheel, and started the engine. He stole a glance at Addy, but she was already looking at him. The force of her gaze knocked him back. Admiration. Affection. Hunger.
It was the last emotion that had all the blood rushing between his hips. His skin tingled to be touched. His pulse pounded as he looked her over. She was leaned back against the headrest, chin tilted in his direction, a small smile on her face. Her eyes were so fucking beautiful with long lashes framing the wide hazel-green depths. The colors reminded him of earth. Of the way she made him feel grounded and exhilarated at the same time, like waking in a quiet, moss-padded forest before kayaking along daring river rapids. Her gaze moved to his, and the small smile lighting her face, the excitement snapping in her gaze made him wish his house was closer to base.
“Gotta take care of those bites first thing when we get home.” His voice was strained as he spoke. The words were more a reminder to himself of where his priorities needed to be. Addison needed medical care, too. Anything else would have to wait. He cleared his throat and turned his focus to the road. It was his job to get Addy home safe, and he was doing a piss-poor job of it driving with his eyes locked on hers. He drummed his fingers impatiently against the wheel as they slowed at the security checkpoint, then pulled out on the main road.
“You said home,” she said after a moment.
“Feels right. Not once has a woman stepped foot in my house. It’s my private space. You though…” His gaze flicked to hers and he wet his lips. “Fuck, I’ve been imagining you there for so long. I already know it’s going to feel more like a home when you’re there than it ever has before.” He eased on the brake as the traffic lights changed to red and he let out a growl of frustration. Addy chuckled. He reached his hand over the console and rested it on her thigh. He didn’t dare look over, though, afraid of getting lost in her gaze again.
“Archer?”
Something about the way she said his name made his stomach quiver. “Yeah?”
“Maybe the bug bites could wait until after our shower?”
His lungs seared. He wasn’t going to be presumptuous and assume she was implying they’d shower together, but the mental image of cupping her sudsy breasts, of running his hands over her body, had him stiffening to the point of pain. “I was going to suggest you shower before I treat the bites. Then I can load you up with ointment.” His voice, low and thick, was a dead giveaway to where his mind had gone.
“I’d like to take care of you, too. Wash you clean of the dirt and grime from the Amazon, but more the stain of traffickers. Of what they did to those women and children.”
“Doesn’t go away.” Warmth covered the top of his hand and he smiled despite the seriousness of their conversation. His gaze flicked to her thigh, where her much smaller hand was stacked on his. “Sometimes it seems like the moment we put one group down another pops up, even more depraved than the first.” The light changed and they started moving forward.
She gave his hand a quick squeeze. “But there are men and women like you who won’t give up. Who hold on to that darkness so others can live without knowing the depth of pain and suffering. What it sounds like, looks like, smells like, feels like. Thank you for that.”
He didn’t like being thanked for what he did, essentially taking lives for the greater good, but coming from Addy it was different. She accepted the career he’d chosen. He’d enlisted the day he turned eighteen. His only hesitation had been leaving his mother and father behind, but they’d encouraged him to make his own choices, especially after Quinn’s death. God, they were going to love her. “You study every part of human existence. You’ve seen the bad, too, and still you believe people are inherently good. That people from all around could live in peace. The world needs more Addison Desmonds.”
“It wasn’t about that for me. Not at first.” Addy puffed her cheeks before releasing a breath. “I wanted answers. I had—have—so many questions. Ones I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to make sense of. When our mother left, all I wanted to know was why. Where there specific traits in offspring that made a mother reject them? What was the outcome for abandoned children? And the role of communities that either shun those children or support them.”
His heart clenched at her words. Addy was so self-sufficient and confident in her abilities that it was easy to forget she’d lived with the same trauma as Joker. “I don’t have those answers, but I do know your mother walked away from two precious children who have both thrived and moved on to do good in the world. It wasn’t some trait in you that made her leave, it was one in her. She was so self-absorbed she cared about her own immediate needs more than the two people she was supposed to protect. That’s on her, Addison. Her shame to live with, not yours. Not Joker’s.” He flipped his palm, intertwining their fingers.
“What about your parents?” Addy asked, changing the subject. One brief conversation wasn’t enough for him to help her come to terms with the maternal rejection she’d faced. God knew Joker had never gotten over it and still had insecurities. Sam always seemed to know how to soothe him, though. He was determined to do the same for Addy. To show her she had nothing to do with the reasons her mother left.
“They had every right to pull into themselves after Quinn’s death. God knows I tried, but they wouldn’t let me withdraw. They worked twice as hard to support the one kid they had left, and not in a smothering way, but they gave me their time and love while still providing me space to breathe. I know they wanted to talk about Quinn often with me, to share memories together, but I couldn’t, and they respected that. They still live in the Chesapeake Bay area of Maryland where I grew up, but we moved to a different house. It was too painful for all of us to continue on in the place she’d suffered so profoundly. They bought a nice big house right on the bay. They’re going to adore you, Addy.”
“You want me to meet your parents?”
“Sweetheart.” He turned into the driveway and hit the garage door opener. All the motion-sensor lights had lit up around the house. He parked the car and killed the engine as the door closed behind them. He unbuckled his seat belt and angled his body to face her. “The things I feel for you…” How did he tell her he was all in without scaring the shit out of her? The age gap between them still lingered, but it didn’t seem to bother her. If she didn’t care that he was fifteen years older, he wouldn’t either.
“Hey.” Her hand had moved up his arm, now clutching his biceps. He dipped his chin, meeting her eyes. God, that look. That fucking heat sharpening her gaze had tension coiling his muscles. One glance was all it took and his heart contracted like the squeeze of a trigger, bounded forward with incredible force, and broke free of the barrel. His emotions struck with stunning weight. He reached for her, hand curling around the back of her neck, drawing her closer. She leaned into him, eyes still searching his face, before their lips met in frenzied, uncoordinated kisses. Her fingers curled into his shirt while his other hand went to the small of her back, bringing her as close as he could manage. Blood was roaring in his ears, his body wanting to take control, but he wouldn’t. Not until he was sure she was okay. One last stroke of his tongue against hers and he pulled back. She groaned in protest.
“Let me take care of you first.” Her eyes were nearly black with lust, and it was torture not to pull her onto his lap. Her eyes fluttered closed and when she reopened them, they weren’t quite as dazed.
“Fine, but to save time we shower together.”
Despite the intensity coursing through his veins, he smiled and chuffed out a small laugh. “Okay.” He kissed her nose and they both exited the vehicle. He opened the dead bolt, and a loud meow came from inside. He couldn’t help but smile at his feline companion. Pretzel was standing in the doorway and he scooped the cat up. “Hey, girl. Sorry to leave you so long.” The cat’s body vibrated in purrs.
“That’s not the little ball of fur I left with Julian six months ago.” Addy laughed.
“She’s living up to her namesake.” He’d told Addy when he first discovered the cat that he was naming it after his sister’s cat.
Addy smoothed her hand over the bright orange fur pillowed between the cat’s ears. He placed her back on the floor, where she wove in and out of their legs as they stepped into the foyer. His stomach suddenly stirred with nerves. “Branch, Hannah, and Collin live in this development now, too. They’re only about a half-mile walk from here.” And Addy had lived in all types of settings. Maybe she’d think it was wasteful for a man living alone to buy a larger home. The houses in the development were new, and although the structures were different, he couldn’t help but wonder if she was thinking it was too cookie-cutter for her tastes. He wanted her approval in the worst way because this was Addy. The one woman who had caught his eye.
They removed their shoes, and she straightened, her gaze moving over the kitchen with its slate-blue cabinets and clean marble counters. He didn’t design a thing, but he loved the coastal feel of the interior. “That’s amazing! I had no idea you were neighbors. Your home is beautiful. It has a good, peaceful feel to it.” She leaned down and picked up the large cat, holding it to her chest, just like Quinn had done so many times. There was pain in the memory, but mostly affection. Addy had given him that. Given him the ability to remember his sister.
“That’s what I thought when I bought it. Branch came with me to check it out and ended up submitting an offer on the open lot down the street. Come on, I’ll show you where the bathroom is. You can have a head start. Toss your clothes outside the door and I’ll get our stuff into the wash.” He was serious about seeing to her bites before engaging in anything physical. She kissed the cat and put her down.
He winced as guilt rose up fast and hard. He still hadn’t cleared the air with Joker and all he could think of was Addison stripping bare in the bathroom feet away. Still, this relationship was his and Addy’s. Joker had to know that he’d never hurt her, and he’d give everything he had to make her happy. Protect and cherish her for as long as she’d let him.