Chapter 29 Mattaniah
Mattaniah
The apartment door is barely open when a spike hits.
Dominic is still turning the key and Amos is behind me carrying the duffel bag when my body folds in half in the doorway.
The cramp rips through my abdomen so hard my knees buckle.
The only reason I don't hit the floor is Dominic's arm catching me around the waist.
"Inside." Dominic hauls me through the door and Amos follows, kicking it shut behind us. The apartment is dark and smells like cleaning products, nothing like the nest, and the absence of their scent makes the spike dig deeper.
"Bedroom's down the hall," Amos says, already moving past us.
"He's not going to make it to the bedroom." Dominic lowers me to the kitchen floor, the tile cold against my back through the sweatpants but I don't care because another wave is cresting and my hips are lifting off the ground chasing contact that isn't there.
Amos drops the duffel bag and crouches beside us. His hand finds my forehead and his thumb pulls my eyelid up, checking my pupils.
"His temperature is spiking." Amos' voice is steady. "This one is worse than any of the others. We need to break it before it compounds."
Dominic doesn't wait for the rest of the assessment.
He strips my sweatpants off with one pull, the saturated panties coming with them, and the cold air on my overheated skin makes me gasp.
His mouth finds my neck as his teeth scrape the spot below my ear.
His hand pushes my thighs apart, fingers sliding through the slick that has pooled on the tile beneath me.
"Dominic, please." My hands grab the front of his shirt because his fingers are inside me but they're not enough and the cramp is building toward something that feels like it might actually kill me. "Please, I need more, I can't..."
He unzips his pants and pushes inside me on the kitchen floor of an apartment I've never been in before, and the stretch of him filling me pulls a cry from my throat that bounces off unfamiliar walls.
The tile is hard and cold beneath my shoulder blades and his belt buckle scrapes my inner thigh where his pants are shoved down just far enough.
It's exactly what my body needs.
Amos positions himself behind my head and lifts it into his lap. His hands cradle my skull so the tile doesn't crack against my scalp with each of Dominic's thrusts. His fingers card through my hair and his thumbs trace my temples while Dominic drives into me.
"Harder." My legs wrap around Dominic's waist and pull him deeper. "Please, harder, I need it to stop hurting."
His hips snap forward with enough force that my body slides on the tile and Amos' hands on my head are the only thing keeping me from hitting the cabinets.
The cramp starts to dissolve under the pressure of him inside me, each thrust replacing the pain with a pleasure so sharp it makes my vision swim.
My hands find Dominic's forearms and grip hard enough to leave marks. His face is above mine, his teeth bared, his eyes tracking every shift in my expression. He's not just fucking me. His gaze moves across my face, checking for something.
The pleasure builds in layers, Dominic's cock hitting the spot that makes my back arch off the tile while Amos' fingers stay steady in my hair.
The combined scent of both of them is starting to fill this strange apartment.
The spike's frantic edge dissolves as the pressure in my gut tightens.
The sounds coming out of my mouth get softer and less coherent.
Then the softness starts pulling me somewhere else.
The edges of the kitchen blur. Amos' fingers in my hair feel very far away and Dominic's face above me goes slightly out of focus.
My body is still clenching around Dominic, still arching into each thrust, but the conscious part of me is sinking.
The warmth pulls me down into that quiet place where nothing hurts.
Dominic sees it. His rhythm changes between one thrust and the next, the pace dropping into something slower and deeper. His hands release my hips and slide up to cup my face.
"Stay with me, firefly." His voice reaches me through the warm haze, lower than before, the command softened into a request. "I can see you going. Stay right here."
"I'm trying." My words feel like someone else is speaking them. "It feels... Dominic, it feels so..."
"I know." He drops his forehead against mine and his hips roll in slow, grinding circles that keep the pleasure building without the sharp intensity that pushed me under last time. "I've got you. Keep your eyes on me."
My eyes find his through the haze. He's right there, his face filling my vision, his breath warm against my mouth. Behind me Amos leans down and presses his lips against my temple, then the curve of my ear. Dominic's slow thrusts keep me floating just above the drop.
"That's it." Dominic's thumb traces my cheekbone while his hips maintain their grinding rhythm. "Right there. Stay right there."
He keeps me hovering right at the edge, his cock moving inside me with a control that must be costing him everything, his gaze locked on mine. Amos' mouth moves against my ear, murmuring words I can only half hear.
"I'm close. Dominic, I'm right there."
"Then come." He rolls his hips forward and holds himself deep, the head of his cock pressing against the spot that unravels me. "Come for me, firefly. I've got you."
The orgasm rolls through me from somewhere deep, a slow wave that builds and crests without the explosive violence of the spike-driven ones.
My body tightens around Dominic in rhythmic pulses and he follows, his knot swelling just enough to stretch my rim while his release fills me in warm bursts.
The sensation of the knot and the warmth pulls the subspace closer, but Dominic's eyes hold me at the surface.
Amos' mouth stays pressed against my temple.
I float right at the edge, the pleasure so complete my eyes water.
"There you are." Dominic says it against my mouth, his breath shaking. "You stayed."
"I stayed." My voice comes out thick and wondering. "I could feel it pulling me down. But it didn't feel scary this time. It felt..."
"You felt safe." Amos' mouth curves against my temple.
"Yeah." I blink and the kitchen comes back into focus, the tile cold against my bare legs, Dominic still locked inside me, Amos' lap warm under my head.
"Is that what subspace is supposed to feel like?
Because last time it felt like drowning and this time it felt like.
.. I don't know, being held underwater but knowing I could breathe. "
"That's what it feels like when the Alpha handles it right." Amos' fingers keep their rhythm in my hair. "Last time Dominic didn't see the signs. This time he did."
"I slowed down." Dominic says it against my mouth. "I saw your eyes start to go and I slowed down instead of pushing harder."
"You slowed down." I reach up and touch his face, my fingers tracing his jaw. "You learned that from last time."
He turns his head and presses his lips against my palm. The gesture is so careful that my chest aches with it.
Dominic's knot deflates after ten minutes on the kitchen tile, which is not comfortable.
He pulls out and helps me sit up while Amos retrieves the duffel bag from where he dropped it by the door.
My legs are shaking and the tile is wet.
I'm sitting naked from the waist down in an apartment I've never seen before.
Somehow the whole situation feels less terrifying than it did in the car.
"We need to get you to the bedroom." Amos slings the duffel over his shoulder and offers me his hand. "The next spike could be six hours from now or it could be one. We should set up while we can."
The apartment is smaller than I expected.
Two bedrooms, a bathroom, a kitchen that now smells like sex and slick, and a living room with a couch that has clearly been slept on more than the bed.
Dominic's taste is in the furniture and Amos' taste is in the bookshelves lining the far wall.
They've been sharing this space for years.
The bedroom has a king bed with clean white sheets and nothing else. No nest, no throw blankets, no stolen clothing. The blankness of it hits me harder than the spike did. My body wants the nest and this room smells like laundry detergent.
Amos sets the duffel bag on the bed and unzips it. The scent hits me before I see the contents, the concentrated combination of everything I've been collecting, and my throat tightens.
"You packed my nest."
"You're going to need it." Amos starts pulling items from the bag and laying them on the bed. "Tell me where things go."
My hands are shaking but they know what to do.
I pick up the cardigan and spread it at the head of the bed as the base layer.
Amos' scarf winds through the pillows. The sweater goes on the right side because that's where I sleep.
The socks tuck under the pillow. Dominic watches from the doorway with his arms crossed while Amos hands me items one at a time.
"The throw blanket goes over everything." I smooth it across the top of the arrangement and step back. The nest isn't as elaborate as the one in the closet because half the items are still back at the house, but the scent is right.
Dominic crosses the room and tosses the shirt he's wearing onto the bed beside the nest. It's warm from his body and carries fresh scent.
"Get in," he says.
I get in. The nest closes around me and the scent hits my nervous system and my muscles release all at once, the tension draining out of me so fast that tears prick my eyes.
Amos climbs in on my left. Dominic climbs in on my right. The bed is big enough for all three of us but I press into the center until my body touches both of theirs, my back against Dominic's chest and my face against Amos' collarbone.
"I'm scared." The words come out muffled against Amos' shirt.
"The heat. I've never had a real one with people I actually.
.. with Alphas who..." My throat closes and I swallow hard.
"What if I'm different during heat? What if my body does things that disgust you? What if I beg for things that you..."
"Whatever you need during heat, you get." Dominic's voice is blunt against the back of my neck. "Whatever you ask for, whatever your body demands. No judgment."
"You don't know what I might ask for or what the heat is going to do to me.
" My fingers twist in Amos' shirt. "I've heard stories about Omegas in heat who lose themselves completely.
What if you don't want me after? What if you see the heat version of me and it's too much and you realize I'm not worth the. .."
"Niah." Amos pulls back enough to look at my face. "We watched you burst into a boardroom full of executives this morning with slick on your pants because you needed us badly enough to throw away every shred of dignity you had. You think heat is going to show us something we can't handle?"
"The boardroom was different. I was still me. During my heat I might not be."
"You'll still be you." Amos' thumb traces my cheekbone. "You'll be a version of you that needs more, asks louder, and holds on tighter. That's not a different person. That's you without the filter your mother spent years installing."
"You'll stay with me? Both of you? The whole time? Even if it's five days? Even if I'm... a lot?"
"The whole time, firefly." Dominic's arm tightens around my waist from behind, pulling me back against his chest. "You're going to be a lot. You're already a lot. That's not a problem."
"That's kind of an insult."
"It's a compliment from someone who doesn't know how to give them." Amos grins against my hair.
My body is exhausted. The drive over and then the spike on the kitchen floor have wrung me out completely. The nest smells right. Both of their bodies are pressed against mine.
"During the heat, if it happens again, I want to go deeper." My fingers tighten on Amos' shirt. "I want to know what it feels like when I actually let go."
"We'll get you there." Dominic's mouth rests against the nape of my neck. "When you're ready and not a second before."
"I'm going to be so much work during this heat."
"You're already so much work." Dominic's thumb traces a circle on my hip. "The heat is just going to be more of the same."
"Still an insult."
"Still a compliment." Amos' laugh vibrates through my chest.
Every fear my mother ever planted about losing control is sitting in the back of my skull waiting for its moment but for the first time, I feel powerful enough to keep it there. She can’t get to me here.