5
Anthony
Ohio is for Lovers – Hawthorne Heights
O nce my song starts to play over the speakers, the crowd goes wild. I consider this one of my favorite songs to ride to for my dirt jumps. Once I get on deck, I can feel the crowd’s energy, along with something else. I feel it in the middle of my chest, a feeling only a certain someone can bring out of me.
I drop in and go through my first run. Once I am back on deck, I look around the crowd and still don’t see her. Why am I hoping she will be here? It’s probably for the best that she is not. As the announcers state my scores, I drop in for my second run. Again, I have another flawless ride. Once done, I lean on my bike and look over the crowd, and that’s it. I see her, and she is staring right at me. I give her a quick nod and smile over to her. She is with Nick and Neha, and I am not surprised they are all together. Though, after the announcement of my standing for the second run, she quickly turns and runs down the stairs–once again, out of sight.
As soon as the dirt event wraps up, I take my bike and quickly go in search for her. I have no clue where to start. However, a part of me thinks maybe she went back to the whiskey tent for another drink. She loved that shit in high school. I make my way over to the tent, and, sure enough, she is waiting in line talking with Neha. I start to make my way over.
Nick jumps in front of me, grabbing onto my bars, asking, “What are you doing?”
Sending him an annoyed look, I tell him, “What does it look like I am doing? I am going to say hi to her. Don’t stop me, everything is fine.”
He does not look convinced with this. Nick tells me, “I told her about Mika, so she knows you have a girlfriend and you’re welcome for that.”
This hits a nerve, “Why the hell did you tell her that? In case you haven’t noticed, Mika isn’t even here. She conveniently went on a girls’ trip while I was touring.” She is choosing other things over me. I look at him and tell him, “I just need to say hi to her and see how she has been. That’s it.” My heart is beating faster than at any event I have ridden.
Walking up behind her, I can tell the moment her body can feel me around. We have an invisible pull to one another, and it clearly hasn’t gone away. Coming up behind her, but not too close, I lean in and say something I know will get a reaction out of her. “Ashlynn, baby, let me see you.”
I can hear her breath catch and ever so slowly, she fully turns around and looks up at me through her dark lashes and gives me a big smile. My breath is taken away.
I try to find my words, but she beats me to it telling me, “I saw your second run for dirt; you were amazing–always have been.”
I give her a shy smile; don’t ask how, but she can still make me blush. Looking at her, I thank her for coming and watching me.
She looks away for a quick second and says, “I honestly wasn’t planning on watching you, but I was assured by two certain people that you wouldn’t see me because the dirt event has one of the bigger audiences. However, once I heard your song playing and getting up the stairs, I was stuck in my spot watching you. I couldn’t take my eyes from you.”
Thinking to myself, I realize it’s nice to hear that someone enjoys watching me do what I love.
As we continue catching up, a familiar song comes on at the tents: Ohio is for lovers by Hawthorne Heights starts to play. We both look at each other, smiling, remembering that the last time I was around her was at this concert. That was a good night, even though I knew it didn’t mean we would be back together. I left the next day for Greenville.
Ashlynn lets out a small laugh and I look at her with a smile, asking her, “What are you laughing at?”
Shaking her head she says, “Just remembering that the last time we saw each other was at this concert.” I nod my head in agreement, letting her know I remember. I remember everything. Staying in line a bit longer, I keep stealing glances at her. She is still the same, but has changed in certain ways. One thing that hasn’t changed is the scent coming off her: peppermint and vanilla, same as in high school and one of my favorite combinations. As much as I don’t want to do this, I do have to get going to my company’s tent for autographs.
I tell Ashlynn, “I have to go; I have autographs to do. It was good seeing you again, really. I am happy you came. Thank you again for watching my dirt ride.” She almost looks disappointed that I have to go and starts to talk, but is quickly interrupted when someone jumps on me from out of nowhere.
I regain my balance before I realize it is fucking Mika, who just jumped on me while I was having a moment with Ashlynn. This girl can really ruin a good thing.
Backing up out of her hold, I ask her, “What are you doing here? Weren’t you on a girls’ trip in Mexico?”
All she does is roll her eyes at me. Then, she says, “Why can’t you just be happy I came to surprise you here and watch your event?”
Now, I am the one annoyed and she knows it. I tell her as nicely as I can, “Well, you are a bit late to watch me, since I have already completed all my events for today.”
She throws her head back dramatically and sighs. “Sorry I missed it, but I have seen you ride these same events every time you do a tour, and it’s all the same.” Livid is the word that comes to mind at this comment and Nick is watching this all play out and realizing why I no longer talk much about Mika.
Looking at her, I tell her, “You probably should have just stayed in Mexico, knowing you wouldn’t make it in time to see my event.”
Nick comes over to us, quickly says hi to Mika, and turns to me and mouths, “WHAT THE FUCK.”
Jumping on my bike, I get the hell out of there. I have fans to meet. This is the shit I am talking about with Mika–something is missing. Her saying that all my events are the same at every tour, just further proves that we no longer should be with each other. Nick somehow beats me to the Overbear tent.
I look at him and let him know, “I don’t want to hear it, man.”
Nick doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut, though. “I didn’t know it was that bad with her. Why haven’t you filled me in on that? What the hell, man?”
I look over at him and let him know. “There really isn’t anything to say. She is who she is. It just isn’t working for me anymore. She only cares about the money now and you heard her; she thinks every tour is the same.”
All he says is, “Yeah, I fucking heard. She’s not even my girlfriend, and that shit pissed me off.”
After the line is finally at the end and all fans have been met with signed autographs, I am beat from the day, but I know what is waiting for me at the hotel. Nick asks if I want to go to a bar with the other riders and grab some drinks and celebrate the Denver stop. I tell him yeah, that I will have to take an Uber, because I have to go take care of something. Nick knows what I am talking about without me having to tell him. Once he drops me at the hotel, I have an instant dread feeling in every part of me. Yes, Mika has been with me from the start and helped pull me out of my black hole that Ashlynn caused, but she has changed after so long together. It’s over and has been for a long time, I just haven’t wanted to bring it up.
Opening the door to the room, she is sitting by the window looking out at the mountains. Turning around, I can tell she has been crying and I feel like shit for being rude to her at the venue.
She looks at me and says, “That was her, wasn’t it?”
The color drains from my face, but I answer her. “Yes, that was Ashlynn. How did you know? I’ve never shown you any pictures of her.”
Rolling her eyes at me, again, she tells me that she has been snooping in some boxes in the attic at my house and found a box. When she opened it, she saw all my pictures of Ashlynn and me from high school, along with notes, movie tickets, and other sentimental things you keep from relationships.
“You went looking through my things?” It’s all that I can get out at this point.
She is even making me feel guilty for talking to Ashlynn, even though everything about it was innocent. Her only excuse for going through the attic was she was bored.
I move closer to her and lay it out. “Look Mika, we haven’t felt right in a long time, and I think we need to go our separate ways. I don’t think we are with each other for the right reasons anymore. You are more concerned about going out with your friends and asking me about the amount of money I will get for events.” I continue to tell her more reasons why I think this is for the best and assure her that seeing Ashlynn at the tour was just a coincidence. She was there with another friend from school who works for Sports World magazine.
Shaking her head, she says, “I agree and understand. Sorry that your riding doesn’t interest me anymore. I’ve been wanting something more for so long, but never knew how to tell you. I am glad we are talking about this though.”
Shocked that this was easier than expected and curious, I ask her what more does she want? She looks at me, saying one word. “Marriage.”
I tell her right away, “I’m sorry Mika, but I’ve never seen us that far into the future. I am not ready for that.” At least not with her, I say to myself. After Mika leaves, I catch an Uber to the bar where everyone is celebrating, spotting Nick and Neha–shocker–sitting at the bar with several beers in front of them. Heading over, Nick instantly hands me my favorite Colorado beer, Beehive, and asks if everything is good. I smile and give a small nod.
Everything is going to be good and will only get better from here. We make a toast to the Denver stop and all in unison say, “Salt Lake City lookout, here comes the Extreme Tour!”