Chapter 15 #2
His eyes widened, his mouth opening and closing. I turned and headed downstairs, grabbing a glass of water. I handed it over the moment I walked back into the bedroom. Tex was dressed in sweats hanging low on his hips. “I’ll sleep on the couch,” Tex suggested.
“And cover it with your body oils?” My face scrunched up with disgust.
“My what?” Tex’s mouth tilted up in a smile. “But you sit on it.”
“It’s for lounging, not sleeping.” I waved my hand, unwilling to start the same old argument I had with Giancarlo whenever he stayed over. “You will sleep here next to me.”
“That’s….” Tex looked away from me. “Dangerous.”
I hummed as I pulled the comforter back. “And that turns you on?”
Tex’s head whipped around to stare at me. “It doesn—”
“Don’t lie, Tex.” I fixed him with a stare dragging my gaze down his body. A visible shiver wrecked his muscular frame. I smirked at him. “Don’t you have better self-control?”
“No,” Tex answered right away.
I knew the answer, but I hadn’t expected Tex to say it aloud. His eyes dimmed as he looked down.
“Never have,” he added.
I’d been looking into Tex. There were a few incidents when he was a teen hanging out with the wrong crowd, but he’d never gotten in trouble. Expelled three times but nothing past that. I’d wanted to know everything about him but that ran the risk of my obsession growing.
Not that it isn’t already running rampant.
“Get in bed, Tex,” I ordered.
He licked his lips, looking at me and then at the other side of the bed. His eyes were bloodshot, and no doubt he was exhausted. The sun was already breaking the horizon, but thanks to the blackout shades, the room stayed lit by artificial light only.
“What happened to Brycen Grennan?”
All the air in the room was sucked up, and I was left breathless as I stared at Tex. His lips were moving, but not a word reached my ears.
I was dragged back into the past.
“I’m sorry,” Brycen cried.
“Bullshit,” Benito shouted.
His eyes met mine, and I drew back my fists once more. His gray eyes pleaded for me to give him mercy. My heart was firmly lodged in my throat, and my stomach was at the bottom of my feet.
“I messed up.” Brycen’s eyes bore into mine.
What could I say? He hadn’t just messed up. He’d attempted to take my family away.
“Messed up is being called into the police and telling them a few things. Reporting it to Enzo right away would have worked in your favor. But that’s not what you did, was it?” Benito paced, his fists hung at his side.
My brother was always careful what he showed people outside our family, but his pain was visible.
Tears slid down Brycen’s cheek, clearing a few spots of blood.
I couldn’t find it in me to enjoy this. Inflicting pain on others was a moment of peace for me, and Brycen was robbing me of it along with my heart.
“Hey!” A sharp slap to the side of my face dragged me out of my memory. I blinked and met blue eyes as the gray ones faded to the farthest part of my memory.
“Shit, there you are,” Tex said, letting out a breath. His thumb stroked along my cheek and over my beard.
It was a comfort that not many would give me. My brothers were the only ones to ever do so. Even Brycen had been weary at times. Whenever I checked out, he stayed far away.
Tex, on the other hand, always moved closer. I reached out for him and pulled him down to the bed. He grunted as I rolled on top of him and smashed him against the mattress with my body.
“Hey, what the hell, Enzo?” He slapped his hand down against my side, but I didn't move.
I pushed my face against his neck and breathed him in. It was calming in the way it quieted the noises around me and grounded me to the spot. Tex wiggled under me.
“Stay like this,” I said.
“Only if you talk.”
Was that a fair trade? Before my mind could make up the answer, my mouth was moving. “Brycen was someone important to me.”
Tex stiffened under me, but I kept going. He asked for the story; I’d give it. There was no phone or recording device on him. It was just the two of us in bed, alone.
“We met at a charity event; his date had left him behind. But that entire night, we kept finding ourselves talking. He was wild, cheerful, and—” Everything I am not.
I could feel Tex’s heartbeat. I closed my eyes, basking in it for a second before I continued.
“One thing led to another, and I took him back to the hotel.”
“The same one you took me to?” Tex asked.
“Yes.”
Tex stiffened under me. I got the sense I might have said something wrong. I tilted my head back, but he refused to look at me.
“Okay, you guys fucked, and then what?” His words were blunt and sharp at the same time.
“He stayed around. Taking up residence in the hotel suite. It soon turned into more. Brycen was what I wanted, and he was happy to hand himself over to me.”
Maybe that should have been a sign.
“We were together for a few months before I realized something was different about him. He always needed money and what I gave him was never enough. Things would go missing at the hotel, and when I asked him about it, he said his sister needed help.”
I took in a breath. “She did. She was in the hospital at the time, so I gave him enough money to pay the bills so he wouldn’t be stressed out anymore.”
Tex’s dark eyebrows scrunched together. “She’s swimming in medical debt.”
Should I be surprised that he’d done his homework? Tex was wildUnlike Brycen, there was intelligence in his blue eyes. There were similarities but so many differences. Maybe that's why…..
“He wasn’t giving her any of the money. But I overlooked it all.” My stomach twisted as shame reared its ugly head.
Tex reached up and touched my shoulder. I normally hated being touched so much, especially when I was forced to go through my own emotions but Tex’s hand was like a warm blanket.
“After a few months of being together, he started disappearing at random times. I didn’t think much of it.
I only visited the hotel once or twice a week.
” Looking back on it, there were a lot of signs I should have noticed.
“However, I slowed down on how much I was giving him. He was going to overdose if he kept it up. Brycen had sworn to me he was going to get help and slow down. But that never happened. Instead, he started meeting up with the cops.”
Tex stiffened under me one more. This time, I attempted to comfort him in the same way he’d done me. I had no idea if I was doing it right.
“He sold intel on my family, but with me keeping him at the hotel, he didn’t have nearly enough info to keep up with his drug habits.
We nearly had New York locked down. All of sudden cops were busting businesses down, storming in on shipments.
Things were going bad and fast.” I pressed my face against his neck and took in another deep breath.
“We were in constant shootouts with the NYPD and other families.” We’d lost so much and couldn’t find out where it was coming from.
History is trying to repeat itself, but it isn’t Tex. I knew down to my soul that he wasn’t the reason for any of the shit happening. He wasn’t Brycen.
“I wasn’t the only Vitale he was seeing.”
“The fuck?” Tex shouted.
I cocked a brow at his visible anger. Is he mad at me?
“So not only was he a rat, he was a cheating piece of shit too?”
Laughter tumbled free, and I hid my face as I tried to gather myself. When was the last time I laughed with someone besides my brothers?
“Yes, but to be fair, we’d never said that we were together. I’d assumed him staying meant he was fine with being mine.”
“How did you find out it was him?” Tex asked.
Anger rolled through me, remembering all the blood and the pain. “He shot my brother.”
“What?” Tex attempted to sit up, but I forced him back down.
I never wanted to see Benito drained of color or sweating in pain another day in my life.
“Is he… is he alive?” Tex asked.
“You saw the picture.” I didn‘t have to ask him. It was written all over his face. “My brother gave it to me to remind me what happens when I no longer put family first.” It hadn’t been a reminder just for me but the both of us.
“That’s fucked up, but also...” Tex shrugged. “I don’t want to say nice, but it’s clear you guys have each other’s back.”
I nodded.
Tex fidgeted, and I could tell he had a pressing question. I waited for him to finally voice it.
“Did you love him?”
I pulled back and looked Tex in the eyes. My brows dipped as I thought about the question.
“Never mind.” He shook his head and avoided my gaze.
I placed all my weight on one hand, used the other to grip his chin, and turned his head so that he was facing me. “I can’t say that I did. Brycen met many of my needs. He was someone I wanted and even cherished at times.”
Tex stiffened under me again.
“But I could never tell him I loved him.”
Tex searched my face. He must have been found whatever he was looking for because he relaxed under me.
“You didn’t want to do it,” Tex asked.
“Kill Brycen?”
Tex’s face blanched as he stared up at me. His head jerked up and down.
“There is a lot in life we don’t want to do, but we have to.”
Tex bit down his bottom lip, abusing the flesh. I pulled it free and swiped my thumb over it, wanting nothing more than to give in and taste him.
I moved a little, staring into his eyes. “My turn.”
“Your turn?”
“What are you going to do?” I asked. “Now that you know.”
Tex squeezed his eyes shut, and I knew it was too much to ask of him right now. I moved forward and brushed our lips against one another before rolling off him. “Get some sleep. You have today off, so sleep as much as you can.”
“How...” Tex groaned. “Never mind.” He moved and got under the cover next to me.
I grabbed the remote and turned the lights off before hitting another button that closed the curtains. The room was blanketed in darkness. A few seconds ticked by as I stared up at the ceiling. I knew Tex wasn’t asleep yet. His breathing hadn’t evened out.
My stomach clenched. If he leaves this time, will I stop him?
Tex surprised me, moving closer until we were nearly touching.
His heat called to me. It was like a moth to a flame.
I knew this was bad, yet I didn’t want to pull away.
He laid his head on my chest, and I instinctively wrapped my arms around him.
He stiffened for a second before relaxing.
Silence built between us, neither one of us falling asleep or moving.
Tex’s soothing voice broke the quiet. “Will I end up like Brycen?”
My arms tightened around him. I hope not.