Chapter 25
Chapter Twenty-Five
Samantha
The wedding morning dawned sunny, clear, and gorgeous. Only the bridesmaids all seemed to be exhausted wrecks when we showed up for makeup at a little cottage near the entrance to the venue at eight a.m. Beyond the cottage, men were setting up rows of white chairs on a grassy lawn, and florists were working their magic.
I’d missed four calls from Caleb, but I’d been with Ani until four a.m. She’d talked to Tyler again and they seemed to have settled things, and then we’d all tried to get a few hours of sleep.
Talk in the morning, okay? I read Caleb’s last text, which I read over and over again, clinging onto those words as a tiny shred of hope.
I was shocked to see that even Lilly’s eyes were puffy and her skin blotchy. Part of me wanted to grab her and force her to tell me what had happened between Caleb and her, but to be honest, I already knew exactly just by looking. But a huge flood of relief didn’t bowl me over. I didn’t know if Caleb would forgive me for publicly denying him. And for having so little faith in us that I’d allowed Lilly to enact whatever drama she’d managed to with him.
I would’ve tried to talk with her, but I felt certain that would make me want to kill her, and there was enough going on. Right now things were about Ani. I needed to push aside all my own sorrows and focus on helping her.
Ironically, this morning, only Ani seemed strangely calm. Also, both Ani’s and Tyler’s moms had joined us in the small cottage not far from where the final touches were being put on the straight rows of white chairs, a magnificent floral arbor, and the gorgeous arrangements of salmon and white flowers that lined the aisles. Around us, curling irons were plugged in and giant professional kits of makeup unfolded as we got to work getting ready.
Mia and I secretly wondered if this was a hostage situation—if whatever Ani’s mom had told her after we’d left had caused her to squash down all her doubts. And so we kept trying to find an opportunity to get her alone, but it was impossible with all the commotion.
“Ani, how are you?” Mia and I finally cornered her near the brunch buffet the moms had delivered and set up on the kitchen island. A makeup artist was working on Tyler’s mom in the corner, and a stylist was curling Lilly’s hair at a table. The scent of hairspray was thick in the air, which didn’t exactly mesh with the food—or the stomachs of the rest of us.
“How did the talk with Tyler go, honey?” Mia whispered.
“Now, girls,” Ani’s mom, who was petite like Ani and elegantly dressed in a beige silk dress, said. “Nerves are to be expected before such a big decision like marriage. But everything’s fine.” Then she gave Mia and me a studied look just short of a glare. A clear warning not to upset the bride.
Ani’s mom got called over to consult on Tyler’s mom’s hair. Ani stood in her cute white satin pj top and shorts, her hair in an elegant updo, holding a paper bowl in front of a large fruit salad. I moved closer and started to say something, but she cut me off with a tight smile. “I love you both, and I’m okay,” she said firmly. But the only thing she put on her plate was a piece of watermelon, and I don’t even think she even ate it.
Ani set down her plate. “Tyler told me he loves me,” she said in a quiet voice. “We talked out our future again. He said once the kids come, I can work part-time if I want. We could have a nanny or even one for day and a separate one for night. He’ll come home in the evenings and we can have drinks while our personal chef prepares our dinner and the nanny plays with our kids. We can see them once they’re all clean and in their jammies right before bed. Isn’t that a tidy plan?”
I swallowed. I thought for some reason about Beth, who had this uncanny way of not telling anyone what to do but somehow letting them figure it out for themselves. How did she do that? Because the inside of me was screaming, “Put on the brakes!”
“Ani, did you take a Valium?” Mia asked, still whispering.
“My mom gave me one, but I flushed it.”
“Oh, thank God,” I said.
“I really wanted a man with a tidy plan. Maybe because I felt like a mess. I depended on him to organize me.”
A glance over my shoulder showed that her mom was on the way back.
“Ani, what are you saying?” I asked. “You know, you don’t have to?—”
“All morning long, I’ve been trying to figure out what the problem is,” she said in that deadly calm voice. “I had a messy divorce. I left my nursing job at a time when all my friends were making good money and buying things and settling down, and I had to start all over again from scratch. At that time, I needed someone to make my life—me—feel more in control. Tyler did that for me. He’s organized and he always has a plan. There’s only one problem.”
“What’s that, honey?” Mia stroked her arm.
She gave a sad shrug. “Tyler’s version of our life isn’t messy enough.”
“Excuse me?” This from Mia, who looked like she was struggling to follow.
“His view of our life. It’s so… tidy and neat. Life isn’t neat. It’s messy.”
“You can say that again,” I said. “Really messy.” Didn’t I know it.
“I mean, I want chaos,” Ani continued. “I want kids and puppies and all the happy commotion that comes with having a family. I don’t want to be removed from chaos. I want to be in the thick of it.”
I nodded. “Those are all good things.” I thought I understood. She didn’t want to be an observer in her own life. She didn’t want to be removed from the good stuff. That appeared to be exactly what I’d done to myself, sheltering myself from relationships, protecting Wynn from my messes.
“Honey, it’s almost time to put on your dress,” her mom called. “Are you ready?”
Ani had a vise grip on my hand. “What would you like to do?” I asked. Honestly, all she had to do was say the word and I was ready to call this game. I can be loud too.
“Ready, sweetie?” her mom asked. “The photographer just went into the bedroom to take photos of us helping you into your dress.”
Ani looked at her mom. “I need to speak with Tyler,” she said slowly and calmly.
Oh, thank God. I didn’t have to do the Armageddon call. Ani had done it all by herself.
“Well, we can’t do that now,” her mom said, reminding me of a parent talking to a school-aged child. “Come get dressed, and maybe then…”
“No, Mom,” Ani said.
A hush came over the room. The curling irons paused. The hair spray stopped spraying.
“Now,” Ani said, very much in charge. “I need to speak to Tyler right now.” She got up, ready to hunt him down herself in her little satin pj’s and fuzzy white slippers.
I held her back. “I’ll get him.” Then I lifted my skirt and ran out the door and into the entrance to the grassy knoll, where the perfect rows of chairs were now beginning to fill with people. The groomsmen were lined up before an arbor covered with fragrant roses. Caleb saw me running from the cottage and immediately ran to meet me.
Seeing him dressed in a gray tux, looking so handsome, stole my breath and nearly broke my heart. “What is it?” he asked urgently. “Are you okay?”
Are you okay? Oh, my heart. He was concerned about me . “Yes, I… Things aren’t good. Ani needs to speak with Tyler.” I had so much I wanted to say . I got your calls. I want to talk. I’m so, so sorry.
But in medicine you triage, and Ani was my only concern now.
“Have Ani walk out by that hedge.” He pointed right behind the cottage, out of view of the guests. It would be the perfect place for privacy. “I’ll go get Tyler.”
He gave a nod and ran off. I did everything I could to not dissolve into tears. Miraculously, he turned around. “We’ll talk soon,” he said. “Okay?”
I nodded, but I couldn’t read him. His tone offered no reassurances. Maybe I didn’t deserve any. I swallowed and straightened out and walked back into the cottage, but Ani had already come out, still in her pj’s.
“Ani, do you want us to stay nearby?” I asked.
“I want you and Mia here,” she said, her voice a little deadpan. But to her credit, she was holding it all together. “Not far away.”
Tyler came jogging out to meet her, dressed in a dark suit. “That animal is running rampant through the flowers,” he said, flustered. “It’s pulled some out of the aisle arrangements and dragged some of the garland down. Honestly, that woman Marin has no control over her son or her dog.” I got the feeling that he saw the writing on the wall. Maybe by complaining, he was simply trying to distract himself from the truth.
Ani met him halfway, grasping his hands. “Tyler, I can’t marry you,” she said, her voice soft but steady. “I’m sorry.”
To his credit, he looked devastated. And completely unsurprised.
Ani stayed firm. “I don’t want to work part-time. Because I bled to get to where I am, and I want to be the one to decide how much I work. I know we can balance childcare, except you seem to want me to negotiate dinner and dropping off the dry cleaning and chauffeuring the kids while you play tennis and go to the club. And the live-in nanny will absolve you even further of not doing anything with our kids. I can’t live like that. I want a hands-on life. I love you, but not enough to marry you.”
The wedding party gathered nearby collectively gasped. By now, everyone had come out of the cottage, including Ani’s mother. Her dad had walked up beside her mom, and the groomsmen stood awkwardly at Tyler’s side. My gaze strayed over to Caleb, who happened to be staring at me. “I’m sorry,” I mouthed, but I had no clue if he understood.
“Well, that’s a slap in the face.” Tyler rubbed his neck. “You’re making a scene.”
She frowned. “Tyler, this is our life. I should have made a scene a long time ago.” She paused and took a breath. “I have a few more things to say. One, how can you yell at that little sweetheart of a dog?” She turned to Tyler’s parents. “Look, your mother is petting her.” Sure enough, the puppy was now quietly hanging out at his mom’s feet. “And lastly, if you really loved me, you would’ve remembered your damn allergy medications.”
Ani turned away from Tyler walked over to Mia and me. I’d like to have said that Lilly was with us but I honestly had no idea where she’d gone. Ani stood in front of us and faced her parents too. “Mom and Dad, I’m sorry. Really sorry that I didn’t figure this out a long time ago. But I’m not getting married today. If you truly want my happiness, you’ll understand that this isn’t the right thing for me.”
To their credit, they didn’t say anything, but they nodded. And then they walked up and stood beside her. Ani’s mom wrapped her arm around her shoulders. Thank goodness .
Ani bit back a sob. “I’m not sure where I’m going tonight.”
“We got you,” Mia immediately said.
Ani’s mom stepped forward. “You should take your honeymoon.”
“No, Mom,” she said. “There will be a lot of things to do, a lot of phone calls and presents to return?—”
“Mom’s right,” her dad said. “Catch the plane and get away for a while.”
“By myself?”
“Why not?” Her mom’s tone was full of concern. “By the time you get back, things will have calmed down.”
“I’m so sorry,” Ani said.
“No,” her mom said firmly, “we’re sorry. If you were that miserable but held it in because of us, that’s a problem.” She stepped forward and hugged her daughter, and Ani started to cry. “But for now, let’s get you dressed.”
While Mia and I walked back with them to the cottage, Caleb went to talk to the minister and make the announcement that the wedding was not taking place.
* * *
Samantha
A half hour later, after we helped Ani gather her things and saw her off as her dad drove her away—maybe to the airport, maybe not—I ran out to the lovely grassy hillside full of empty, perfectly placed chairs and sat down in the last row. I’m here , I texted. Please come.
But no one came. Only a handful of guys who began stacking chairs on dollies, starting at the front. The wedding that wasn’t was now being disassembled.
The exhaustion and stress made my eyes close, listening to the soft clatter of the chairs being folded and loaded, and I nearly fell asleep.
“Hey,” someone said, my eyes flying open. Caleb? No. I blinked awake to see Quinn standing in front of me, shuffling his feet. “Mind if I sit a minute?”
He took a seat next to me. Cleared his throat. Tapped his fingers together. Then he spoke. “I owe you an apology.”
I almost said Oh, no, forget it, don’t worry about it, whatever . But instead, I just listened.
“My breakup has made me insane.”
“I get that.” Totally. “Breakups can do that.”
“And this wedding has compounded my PTSD.” He laughed a little before he leaned over and tented his fingers together nervously. “I wanted to throw myself into dating again, sort of force myself to get over my ex, but I realized things don’t work like that. I’m sorry for not getting the hint. I think you’re a really cool person. And I wish you all the best.”
“You’re a nice person too,” I said. “Thanks for saying that. Hang in there.”
After he left and I was checking my phone again, I heard a bark and some dog tags jingling. The notorious little Labrador wedding crasher came bounding down the aisle. With, of all things, a rose in her mouth.
The dog bounded right up to my chair, sat, and looked up at me adoringly.
“You’re precious,” I said, bending down to take the rose. I looked around, but no one was in sight. So I petted the dog—without hesitation this time. She nuzzled my fingers and jumped up on my dress, licking my face. Okay, so she didn’t have the best manners. Yet.
I confess that at that moment, I really needed every bit of the love and affection that she lavished upon me.
“You need a name,” I said. “You need a person. I think you’re really special. Not every dog can help stop a wedding that never should’ve happened in the first place.”
“I think you’re really special too.”
I jerked up my head to find Caleb standing there, looking unbelievably handsome in his suit, his cast mostly hidden by some seamstress magic.
I tripped on my dress as I tried to stand up. Which got the hem grassy, but it didn’t really matter, did it? As I straightened out, I was close enough to see that his hair was a little out of place, and that he had gray circles under his eyes. We could all use a few more hours of sleep. “You don’t love Lilly,” I blurted.
“I do not.”
Tears rose to my eyes. I felt relief, but really—I’d known that all along. “Did you take a job in Oak Bluff?”
“I’m still waiting to hear back. Why?”
“Lilly told me you did.”
“I think we both realize now that the truth for Lilly is what she wants it to be.” He moved his crutches to sit, and I sat down beside him. “Why did you give her a free pass to tell me she loved me?”
“At first, I thought I did it because I wanted you to have the free will to choose. But now I think I did it because part of me didn’t believe you could really love me—my problem.”
“Samantha, what’s not to love about you?” He took my hands. Held them so tightly that I teared up with relief. “You’re the whole package. Everything that I ever could want in a partner. Beside you, Lilly is just… Lilly was my temps.”
“Your…what?”
He shot me a handsome grin. “My permit. Now I have my driver’s license.”
That was so cornball. But they were words I didn’t know I’d been waiting my whole life to hear. And I couldn’t stop smiling.
“I’m sorry that I was so quick to believe that you’d run away,” he said. “My problem. I kept thinking something wasn’t right, but I had no idea Lilly would do something like that. I’m sorry she put you in that position.”
“I didn’t know what to do. But I was afraid to make the choice for you.”
“My mom helped me see that Lilly put you in an impossible position—and that you were giving me a full, free choice.” He looked deeply into my eyes. “But Sam, I already had it figured out long before that. I love you.”
“I love you too.” And just like that, the awful weight on my heart lifted. Caleb looked at me with love in his eyes and gently cradled my face, stroking my cheek with his thumb. “It’s been you ever since you stomped up to me with your pink clogs that day in the OR and called me a handsome meathead ortho guy. Handsome being the key, of course. That made me fall in love with you right then and there.”
I looked into those beautiful, familiar pale green eyes and smiled. “I think I fell in love with you when you offered me a ride to the farm even though you couldn’t stand me.”
He gave a little shrug. “There’s a fine line between love and hate.”
I was crying, and the dog was too, so I picked her up and put her in my lap. “She’s special. And I’ve got the perfect name for her.”
“Uh-oh,” Caleb said, rubbing her head. “You know what that means. If you name her, she’s yours.”
“What do you think of Dora?”
He lifted a brow in inquisition. “Like the Explorer?”
“No. Like Adorable .” I scratched behind her ears. “Which she is. In spades.”
“I do believe you’ve fallen in love, Dr. Gas.”
I nodded. “A double fall. Except I’m not so sure about the guy—he fed me some line about looking at stars or something, and turns out he had a blow-up mattress in his truck bed.”
Caleb chuckled. “It worked though, didn’t it? That plus my get-lucky sweatshirt. You might be a magical matchmaker, but I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeve too.”
“No more magic. No more tricks. No more matchmaking,” I said.
“No more denying we’re a couple.” He wiggled his toes. “With a giant heart on my foot, guess I definitely can’t do that.”
I giggled. “I love you, Caleb.”
“Samantha, I love you.”
Then he kissed me, long and sweet and wonderful. The first of a lifetime of kisses. That lifetime starting right now.
And wouldn’t you know, the pup wedged herself between us, her propeller of a tail rotating a mile a minute.
I petted her, and she nudged my hand with her wet little nose.
“I thought you didn’t like dogs,” Caleb said, scratching her behind the ears.
“Well, I didn’t like you much either at first, and look what happened.”
“Magic happens,” he said. And then we kissed again.