52. Chapter Fifty-Two - Desiree
It’s easier said than done to slip back into the Nest undetected, but I do.
I’ve been gone a handful of days, and no one notices or talks to me.
I am nothing but a memory, but that’s about to change.
With purposeful strides, I head for Vyvyan’s chambers.
If my instincts about her attacker are correct, I could leverage my way back into living here.
As I round the corner to Little Death, two vampires clad in leather hover near the entrance.
I turn my face to hide behind my hair.
“Vyvyan’s in a mood,” one of them remarks, and I slow to listen.
“She’s been in a mood,” another responds with a hint of exasperation in their voice.
The first vampire leans in, lowering their voice, “Yeah, but I heard her tell her guards to give her space. She never asks for space.”
With a shrug, the other vampire explains, “Vane’s missing. Again.”
A shiver racks my body, a cold dread settling in my bones.
Has he truly abandoned the Nest?
Is that why he said I would never see him again?
A sharp pang of longing pierces me, a painful reminder of what I’ve lost.
I tell myself it’s for the best.
Now, bound to him by blood, carrying a piece of him within me, his presence would be a constant torment.
I felt the truth in his words when he said he loved me, a fleeting warmth in the glacial wasteland of my heart.
But I force myself to dismiss it.
If his love were real, he wouldn’t have left.
I repeat, I’m better off without him, even though his departure leaves a gaping void.
“Figures,” one of the vampires continues.
“Those two have the strangest relationship.”
“I’ll say. She’s brooding over him in the throne room.”
Their laughter dances through the halls as they disappear into the club.
I circle back to the throne room.
I find Vyvyan alone, perched upon her throne of skulls with her cheek resting in her palm.
The towering flames in the large black clay fire basins behind her crackle and pop, casting monstrous images upon the walls.
When she looks up, my steps falter.
Her eyes are red again.
Vane must have turned her back into a vampire, which means the effects of consuming my blood can be reversed.
Maybe this means she’ll hate me a little less.
“It’s good to see you looking like your usual self,” I say.
“You’ve got some nerve coming back here,” she replies through gritted teeth.
“We need to talk.”
Vyvyan raises an eyebrow.
“I have nothing to say to you.”
As I approach her throne, I avoid the trapdoor to the Eurynomos’s lair.
Just a few months ago, my brother stood on that door before falling into the pit to face the daemon for Zev.
“You will want to hear what I have to say,” I tell her.
Vyvyan glances behind me.
“Where’s Vane?”
I shrug, ignoring the ache in my chest.
“You’re his sire, so you tell me.”
Wait, is she?
Technically, he’s her sire now.
Vyvyan clicks her tongue.
“Watch your sass, Desiree. My guards will have you detained and dismissed with a single word from me.”
Despite my eternal loyalty and belief in her refuge for misfits, she has inexplicably despised me.
But if I’m right about the Balam, I can prove my loyalty to her.
“I know who summoned Balam,” I say.
Vyvyan’s eyes narrow.
“Trying to worm your way back into my good graces?”
I swallow my laughter.
Good graces?
She had me scrubbing urinals.
“I have no reason to lie,” I say.
“I just want to come home.”
“I’m listening.”
“It was you. You raised the Balam the night of the blackout, and you staged the attack inside your bedroom.”
Veins stand out in Vyvyan’s neck, and my adrenaline spikes.
I must be right.
Everything clicked last night.
During our confrontation, the Balam referred to its summoner as a “she.” Vane’s sudden appearance to rescue me and insistence that I do not return to the Nest made it clear he was protecting someone.
Who else would he shield if not Vyvyan?
“I don’t care why you did it,” I add quickly.
“I’m sure you had your reasons. I won’t tell anyone. I want to come home.”
There’s a beat of tense silence, then Vyvyan says, “You’re right. And do you want to know why I did it?”
I gasp, and Vyvyan sits straighter.
Her beautiful face lights up with a cruel smile.
“For the vampires, but especially for Vane.”
I don’t dare say a word.
“You see, we’ve survived over a century without the help of witches,” Vyvyan continues, her voice dripping with condescension.
“The witches forced us underground, then later began killing us to harvest our tears.”
I swallow hard, my mouth too dry.
“Together, Vane and I persevered,” she continues.
“We turned these tunnels into a city. But there had to be rules. No one went up to the surface without permission, and Vane did not, under any circumstances, sire any progeny.”
A knot forms in my stomach as Vyvyan’s words punctuate my eardrums.
“We were strongest, just the two of us. . . until you came along.” Vyvyan’s eyes narrow with hatred.
“Vane’s sensitive. He has been struggling with the idea of eternity for some time now. Nothing I did made him happy anymore. Then you stumbled into our club, and suddenly, Vane acted like his usual self, but it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with you.”
The pieces fall into place.
She staged the attack to drive a wedge between Vane and the surface world.
She wanted to blame the witches and give Vane a reason to retreat underground with her again.
The wolf tracks weren’t part of her plan – they were an unexpected complication.
“He defied my orders, broke all the rules,” Vyvyan continues.
“When he Turned you, he came to me in hysterics—not because he betrayed me, but because he feared for your safety. You’d become a target as part of our family, third in line for the vampire throne.”
My knees buckle.
Vane went to her for help, fearing the consequences I would face.
If true, it counters the monstrous image I’ve built of him.
“My distaste for you began when I understood Vane’s love had shifted. Sharing his affections, particularly with someone as pathetic as you, wounded my pride and heart.”
My mind reels.
How can it be true that Vane loves me when he treated me so horribly?
“I had him devise a plan to bring you into the Nest, but to lie about your sire,” Vyvyan reveals.
“To ensure you wouldn’t come near him, I told him he had to break you. Otherwise, you’d never give him up.”
A sob catches in my throat.
She manipulated Vane during his most vulnerable moments.
“When he began disappearing again—likely to escape the pain of seeing you, knowing you hated him—I devised a plan to bring him back, but this time for good. I summoned the Balam, intending to blame the witches and force us back underground, safe from their influence, where we could be happy. But your poisonous blood interfered, ruining everything.”
I understand it all now – her fear of change, her desperation to control Vane, her desire to recapture what she fears she’s lost.
Vyvyan flashes her fangs as she rises from her throne.
“Which is why kicking you out of the Nest wasn’t the answer. You must disappear. For good.”
I stumble back.
“What, you are going to kill me?”
I shake my head.
Vane left.
He looked me in the eye and walked away.
If he’s the obstacle between Vyvyan and me, his absence should clear the path.
“After everything—after all my loyalty—this is how you repay me? With a death sentence?” I ask.
Vyvyan shrugs.
“It is for the good of the coven. Your blood is deadly.”
Vyvyan may look human, but the humanity inside her is long gone.
“I trusted you. I believed in your promise of a home for outcasts. But now I see the truth. You’re no better than the monsters you claim to protect us from.”
The witches feared the vampires because we were different.
Now, Vyvyan’s doing the same to me.
“Your blood could lead to mutiny, Desiree.”
Vyvyan snaps her fingers—a sound like the crack of a whip.
Her guards burst into the room and surround me.
The remnants of my heart plummet with the knowledge that I’m going to die here, in this very room.
Part of me wants to beg for mercy.
But a spark of defiance ignites within me.
I won’t go down without a fight.
If I do, I might as well roll over and plunge a stake into my own chest.
I sprint toward Vyvyan.
She hisses and plants her feet, but I have no intention of engaging her in combat.
I launch myself at the lever that controls the trapdoor to the Eurynomos’s pit.
I pull with all my might, and the stone floor splits open, revealing a yawning abyss.
With a silent prayer on my lips, I leap into the inky darkness and the slim chance of survival it offers.
I hit the ground hard on my right hip.
The jarring impact sends shockwaves through my body.
The pit is a grim tapestry of stone, sand, and the remnants of those who came before me, their bones splintered and scattered.
Above, Vyvyan peers over the edge of the pit.
“Give it up, Desiree,” she calls out.
“I’ll make your death quick.”
Trembling from head to toe, I raise my hand, and flip her off.
Then, I set my sights on the depths of the pit where Eurynomos resides.
There must be another way out.
Failure is not an option.
I will claw out of this hellhole if necessary.
Engulfed in darkness, I limp forward, to search for an exit.
Every rustle sets my nerves on edge, the fear of the Eurynomos constantly lurking in my mind.
Time crawls until, after what feels like an eternity, I find a trapdoor—a glimmer of hope.
I knock, praying that someone is on the other side.
“Let me out!” I shout, pounding my fists against the barrier.
The Eurynomos might hear, spurring me to bang even harder, desperate to escape before it arrives.
Maybe it’s been watching me all along, waiting for this moment of vulnerability, this breaking point, before it attacks.
“Desiree?” a familiar voice asks.
“Zev?” I gasp.
He’s Misty’s sire, and Misty is not my biggest fan right now.
“What are you doing here?”
“I was going to ask you the same thing,” he replies.
“I need you to let me out,” I plead.
A long pause follows, and my breaths turn ragged.
“How’d you get in there?”
“I jumped.”
“What happened?” Zev asks, almost sounding concerned.
“Please, Zev, let me out before the Eurynomos come,” I plead.
I whimper from a distant sound.
“It is resting,” he reassures me.
“How do you know that?” His stare doesn’t waver.
I gasp.
“Are you its handler?”
“Yes. Vyvyan’s poetic justice after disobeying her.”
Tears prick my eyes again.
Zev betrayed Vyvyan by aiding my brother’s Blade investigations and communicating with his wife through Wilder.
Vyvyan, in her insatiable need for control, punished him for it.
Her rules are meant to keep us safe, but they also bind us, ensuring our obedience.
“Please, let me?—”
The door opens, and Zev appears, bathed in faint light that accentuates his inky hair and kohl-lined eyes.
I squint, adjusting to the brightness, revealing a part of the Nest I’ve never seen.
“Thank you,” I gasp out.
Zev nods.
“You’re lucky I was down here.”
“Which way to the surface?” Vyvan’s guards are likely searching for me.
Zev points left.
“That way, but Vyvyan has the entire coven hunting for you.”
Something inside me deflates.
I’m a fugitive in my home.
“But I know another way.” Zev takes my hand, his soft touch jarring.
“Come with me.”
I hesitate.
Can I trust Zev?
Do I have a choice?
Noticing my reluctance, Zev meets my gaze.
“Your brother saved my life. I owe him. I’m your friend.”
Friends are scarce these days.
I nod, putting my life in Zev’s hands, and pray I haven’t just made a fatal mistake.