Chapter 14
14
T he square of her small town was nothing like she’d seen on TV.
It wasn’t Stars Hollow or Mystic Falls.
It was a literal square—a small patch of green, with sidewalks circling it and right through the center, to the fountain situated with a statue of their founder on it. This time of year was her favorite time to be in the square. It was decorated with lights and garland, a 15-foot Christmas tree off in the corner with a handful of small presents underneath.
It was cold, and not just for Alabama. At a crisp 28 degrees, Hanna had a puffy black winter coat on and a white beanie tugged over her head. The lone bar off the square was open, and merry-makers were drunkenly counting down to the ball dropping. She’d left Bella and Madi there a few moments ago, where they were likely gazing at each other starry eyed before their big, New Year’s Eve kiss.
As she gripped the coin in her hand for her annual New Year’s wish, she thought back to the conversations she’d had with her best friend and her sister over the past few days. About their impending move. Their excitement for New York City. Their anticipation for what’s next.
And about her—her need to take risks, be brave.
She didn’t want to be brave. Not in the slightest.
She wanted to move home. She wanted Bella and Madi to stay there, and the three of them to be there forever together.
But that wasn’t going to happen. And it was time to release all the things keeping her from living her fullest life—the overthinking, the shame, the fear.
She realized now how much fear of rejection—fear of being too much—paralyzed her from letting people in. And she couldn’t do anything about the ways she’d cut herself off to other people before, but she could try to do better. Her heart clenched as she thought of her missed chance with Tucker, but she’d promised herself that she’d reach out to him when she got back to Orange Beach. She doubted he’d want anything to do with her after she’d ignored him for the past month, but she at least wanted to apologize. Maybe they could try to be friends.
She imagined Tucker at Flora-Bama with Shawn and her heart hurt.
Pushing that thought out of her mind, she tipped her head back and closed her eyes, grounding herself in the cold air and sound of the trickling fountain.
“5…4…3…” She heard gleeful shouts around the corner, and grinned to herself when she could clearly hear Madi shouting louder than everyone else.
It was time to be bold. Adventurous. Open.
It was time to let herself love and be loved.
It was time to release fear and embrace change.
Those were the words she clung to as she flicked her coin in the fountain.
“What’d you wish for?”
She gasped, turning around to the voice she’d been imagining in her head for weeks now.
He wore his favorite pair of jeans—she didn't even know how she knew those were his favorite jeans, but she knew it and that probably said more than anything else. A fleece-lined corduroy jacket with tan boots and a dark gray beanie kept him warm as he stood before her, breath puffing out in the cold air. His hands were fidgeting in his pockets and he stood ten paces away from her, his brows furrowed, but eyes alight with happiness.
Happiness—to see her?
“What…” She took a deep breath. “What are you doing here?”
“Getting the girl.” His breath was visible in the air as he spoke, moving slowly toward her.
Her breath caught. “But Shawn?—”
“Told me to come get the girl.”
He took a few more steps in her direction.
She bit her lip. “But I?—”
“Ghosted me because you were scared?”
He was face-to-face with her now, a smirk tugging at his lips.
“Well, yeah.” She whispered, heart fluttering at the way his gaze lingered on her mouth. “I’m sorry about that. I, well… Fuck. I’m not ready for this conversation. I was supposed to practice what I was going to say with Bella and Madi, like, a dozen times before I talked to you again.”
He laughed. “Try anyway.”
Try anyway.
That was the whole goddamn point, wasn’t it?
She took a deep breath. “When I met you, I’d pretty much decided I was done in Orange Beach,” she said, breaking a beat of silence. Her hands fidgeted in her pockets, but she locked eyes with him in spite of her nerves. She wouldn’t glance away—not for this. “My whole life, I’ve been… awkward. Living in the shadow of my perfect older sister and my extremely extroverted best friend. Well, maybe not so much in their shadow as just, used to being able to rely on them. And probably comparing myself to them a little bit. Everything just seemed to come easier to them. So… I went to Orange Beach to try something new. Find myself, as it were. The only thing I found was loneliness. And I’m just now realizing a lot of that was my own fault.”
His eyes narrowed, focusing on her and she took a step closer to him. “I didn’t put myself out there, except for a few horrible first dates. And when I did put myself out there, I overthought everything I did. To the point where it just felt like more than it was worth to even try. ” She laughed humorlessly. “ Try anyway. That’s what you said just now. That’s what I should’ve done back then. Tried anyway. Because my loneliness was my own doing—a lack of putting myself out there.”
Tucker frowned, but she kept going, talking so rapidly that it looked like one steady stream of air flowed from her mouth in the cold. “But then you came along. And no matter how much I tried to withdraw or push you away, you kept trying. And suddenly, I wasn’t so lonely anymore. You were always there—always trying. Making me feel like all my awkwardness was actually not as bad as I thought. Making me feel like, maybe, in spite of all my nerves and self-consciousness and fear of friendships outside the ones I’ve known my whole life, I could do it. I could make a life of my own out there. And it scared the shit out of me.”
Hanna tugged a hand out of her pocket and fiddled with her beanie, eager to twiddle in some way, to get the nerves still coursing through her out of her system. “And at the first sign of trouble, I bailed. The first time I felt like that awkward, nervous girl again, I bolted. Because… because of so many reasons. Because I thought it’d be easier to just quit trying and move home. Because I didn’t think I deserved you. Because I was terrified—of you, one day, realizing you were too fucking good for me.”
She’d said it all—out loud. The things that scared her the most. The worst thoughts she had about herself when she was alone—the worst thoughts she assumed Tucker had about her, too. She kept her gaze on Tucker, trying not to get lost in his brown eyes and completely lose her train of thought.
“But Madi and Bella talked some sense into me. And by that I mean, they basically ripped me a new one for being such a scaredy cat. So when I got back to Orange Beach, I was going to call you and give you a much more cleaned up version of that speech. And apologize. Which—I’m sorry. So fucking sorry that I freaked out and didn’t talk to you. And I was also going to say that—” the thing she didn’t want to tell him caught in her throat, her eyes burning with unshed tears, but she kept going— “that I understand if you don’t want to give me a second chance. I fucked up in all the ways that mattered. But… But I think I’m falling for you. And if you want to give this another shot, I’m all in. For real this time. But if not…” she blinked rapidly, holding back tears. “If not, I at least want to be friends. If you want to.”
Tucker’s eyes were wide, his face unreadable. He reached toward her face with a gloved hand, cradling her cheek. “Fuck friends.”
She sucked in a breath.
What did that mean?
She couldn’t help but hope?—
“That was pretty damn good, shortcake. I don’t think you needed to practice with Bella and Madi. Just speak from the heart.”
She released a breathy laugh, giddy from the hope that was beginning to surge within her. “I really am sorry. And I wish I could promise I won’t get scared and stuck in my head again, but I can’t. I can promise that instead of running away, I’ll talk to you about it. I’ll be more brave next time.”
“It’s okay, shortcake,” he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I’m sorry. I knew you were nervous about meeting my family, and I should’ve made sure I was with you. You don’t have to be brave by yourself.”
The tears she’d been holding back began to fall, and he swiped them with his thumb.
“For what it’s worth, I’m falling in love with you, too,” he whispered. “Might’ve already fallen, actually.”
The words would’ve scared her weeks ago, but she was being brave now—being brave with him. So she responded, “I might’ve already fallen, too.”
Hanna felt Tucker’s body radiate with equal parts joy and desire, his eyes sparkling with relief and love and lust.
“So, what’d you wish for?” He asked, his forehead pressed against hers.
She grinned. “It just came true.”
His mouth captured hers.
He’d booked a room at a local hotel, unsure of where Hanna’s home was and how long he’d be here. After finding out she was staying in her tiny childhood home, he was patting himself on the back for making sure he’d booked a few extra days in his own space.
Especially since all he wanted to do right now was sink inside her and hear her say those three little words while he made her come so hard she forgot her name.
His tongue swept against her lips, the sweet taste of her overwhelming him.
“I have a room at the inn down the road,” he said. “Come over.”
“Yes,” she whispered into his mouth.
He cradled her head up to him so he had a better angle to kiss her as her hands fisted against his chest. Fuck, she felt good. His erection was growing, and she rubbed against him with a reckless abandon.
“Won’t be able to walk if you keep doing that, shortcake,” he said, forcing himself to pull away.
She giggled, grabbing his hand and tugging him toward the inn. A five minute walk to the inn and a quick elevator ride felt like eons in Tucker’s mind, his eyes glued to Hanna, the curve of her neck, the delicacy of her legs, the way her eyes twinkled when she looked back at him.
As they approached his room, he couldn’t take it anymore.
Picking her up, she squealed as he threw her over his shoulder, keyed open the door, and took a few long strides toward the bed before tossing her on it. She bounced, giggling and breathless, then sat up and took off her shirt to reveal a red, lacy bra underneath.
“Fuck, Hanna,” he said, unzipping his pants and toeing them off before taking off his jacket reaching a hand behind his back to tug his sweater over his head. “You’re so?—”
“Hot.” She blushed. “Have I mentioned how fucking hot you are?”
He felt his cheeks turn pink at her praise, smug satisfaction filling him as her eyes glazed over his pecks, his biceps, his abs—then lower still, where she couldn’t look away from his?—
“I want you in my mouth,” she said.
His mouth went dry. “I want to spend the next five days in this bed with you.”
Her eyes went wide with mischief and lust and anticipation.
“Take off the rest of your clothes,” he barely recognized his own voice. It came out as more of a croak.
She slowly unzipped her jeans, lifting her ass off the bed so she could tug them down her legs. Goosebumps rose over her legs, from the cold or the desire, he didn’t know. Slowly—so fucking slowly—she unstrapped her bra and pulled it off, revealing tits he’d been fantasizing about for weeks while fisting his dick. She took off her panties and went to throw them off the bed, but grabbed them from her.
“These are mine now,” he said, bunching them in one hand and inhaling the scent of her.
So. Fucking. Good.
He wanted to bottle up her scent.
“Turn around,” he ordered her. “Lay down so your head is off the bed.”
She did as he asked as he took off his boxers.
“Open your mouth,” he said, but she already had. Her lips eagerly awaited his erect cock.
Hanna moaned as she sucked him into her mouth, and he grunted, forcing himself not to immediately spill down her throat. Instead, he bent over her splayed out body and brought his lips to her clit. She whimpered, faltering for a moment as she realized what he intended to do.
He laughed against her sex, loving the way it felt to take her off guard—loving how messy and frantic and heady her blow job felt now that he was building her to orgasm.
“You’re the best fucking thing I’ve ever tasted,” he said, curling two fingers inside her as he brought his mouth back to her clit, circling it with his tongue in steady strokes.
She began to flutter against his fingers, crying out with his dick in her mouth, and a rush of satisfaction coursed through him at knowing her orgasm was building—that she’d be coming so fast.
He pressed his tongue firmly against that bead of nerves and felt her body shake in a powerful orgasm, and he didn’t remove his mouth or fingers until a few moments later when it had completely passed.
Lifting his head up, he tugged his cock out of her mouth, streams of saliva pouring from her lips.
“I need to be inside you,” he said, walking around the bed and tugging her across it, then flipping her over and positioning her ass in the air.
“Want me to use a condom?” He asked, looking for his suitcase so he could quickly grab one if needed.
“Fuck no,” she moaned, still delirious with pleasure. “I’m on the pill. Fuck me raw. Please. ”
His cock twitched.
“Fuck, Hanna.” He groaned, pushing his dick into her, tugging her ass up higher so he could get that perfect angle where?—
Yes, right there, he thought as he sunk into her.
They moaned simultaneously, and he lost all sense of time and place.
“So—” thrust— “fucking—” thrust— “perfect.”
“Tucker, please .”
He picked up the pace—deeper, harder, faster. God, but she felt so tight, so good. Masturbating to memories of them together could never compare to the feeling of her tight cunt.
“Not gonna last,” he grunted. “Need you to come.”
She moaned. “I’m?—”
Her body spasmed again, and he followed right after her with a barely-stifled shout, in an orgasm that felt like it went on forever. Even when he was done, he couldn’t help but keep thrusting into her, soaking up every last bit of her tight pussy, before he collapsed next to her on the bed.
She snuggled up closer to him, her naked body clinging to his as she burrowed her nose into his neck and inhaled.
“I love you,” he whispered.
She pulled her head back, resting it on his chest. “I love you, too.”