Chapter Nineteen #2
I swallow hard, trying to steady myself as we all stand there, the weight of everything now rushing back in.
The tension…the pressure…the history that ties us all together…
Despite all the uncertainty that’s gnawing at me, I don't feel as lost as I did before.
With Nikolai and Mikhail by my side, I feel a sense of stability.
I take a deep breath in as they finish speaking, both moving in to press a gentle kiss on either side of my face, then slide their hands down my body to wrap their fingers around mine.
Together, we begin to walk back towards the other room, where all of the men remain.
The air feels heavy as we approach, the sounds of their quiet murmurs drifting through the hallway.
I’m aware of the eyes that will be on us when we enter, the silent judgement from my family, but at this moment, with them both by my side, I feel a strange sense of confidence.
This is happening now.
This is my reality.
And I wouldn’t change a thing.
As we take a step into the room, I hold onto Nikolai and Mikhail even tighter, grateful that they’re here to keep me steady.
The atmosphere shifts slightly; it’s less tense now, but it’s still filled with unspoken words.
I can feel all eyes on us.
I force myself to stand tall between them both, my hands gripping theirs as they move with me, unbothered by all the eyes that linger on us.
As we stop walking any further into the room, Nikolai speaks.
“We’re going to make this work.” He tells him all. “Chiara is ours, and that’s final. She will be protected with us, and she will be safe.”
Mikhail nods, adding to what Nikolai has said.
“We’re in this together, and Nikolai and I will stand by Chiara’s side, always.”
The finality in their words make me smile, the weight of it all suddenly becoming real.
This is happening.
This is what they’ve decided.
And for the first time in so long, I find myself feeling like I might not be so lost after all.
I look away from them both to glance over at Papa and Dario, noticing them both standing across from me on the other side of the room. Their expressions are unreadable as they process everything.
I know they don’t understand it, I know they want me to fight against this, but I can’t.
Nikolai and Mikhail mean a lot to me.
More than I ever thought they would.
After taking a deep breath in, I slowly pull my hands away from theirs. Though their grips loosen slightly, they don’t let me go completely. Instead, they both look down at me, their eyes questioning me as I take a step forward, then they finally let go.
I don’t know why, but at this moment, I need to walk towards Papa and Dario.
I need them to know that I’m still theirs.
A daughter.
A sister.
They stand there, watching me carefully, and I feel something inside me ache as I slowly approach them.
Without thinking, I wrap my arms around them both, holding them close as I sigh against Papa’s chest. He stiffens for only a second, then his hands are there as he pulls me in even closer, as Dario wraps his arms around us too.
I feel the weight of their concern as they hug me, the love and protectiveness that has always been there too.
“I know it wasn’t ideal, the way we met.” I say softly to them both as I pull away slightly. “But they have been good to me. They are so good to me, Papa, and I know that I love them. They love me too, and they are so protective over me. They will keep me safe, always.”
Papa’s face crumbles, like he hates what he’s hearing.
I don’t like seeing him like this, but he needs to understand.
This isn’t just a decision that was made by Alessandro, or even the twins for that matter. I was part of this too, and I need them both to be happy for me.
“We can keep you safe, Chiara.”
Dario rasps out, looking down at me with such intensity in his eyes that I have no choice but to look away.
My chest tightens as I force myself to keep on breathing, and even shake my head at my brother.
It’s not true.
Dario can’t keep me safe, and neither can Papa.
Not in the way that Nikolai and Mikhail can, and have done.
I look back to Papa, tears slowly filling my eyes as I search his face.
“I don’t understand it, Papa.” I manage to whisper. “I really don’t, but I know that I love them. They love me too, Papa. I want to be with them. Please don’t make me choose between you both.”
He’s watching me intently, his eyes softening with every word that leaves my mouth.
After a long silence, he finally exhales a slow breath, his face relaxing slightly as he speaks.
“As long as you are happy, Chiara, then I am happy too.”
Papa says in a quiet voice.
I swallow hard, a lump forming in my throat as his words settle over me.
This is everything I’ve needed to hear; the reassurance I’ve been longing for.
Papa, my protector, the man who has always tried to keep me safe; he’s giving me his blessing, even if this situation is anything but easy.
Papa’s voice is soft but steady as he whispers into my ear
“I love you, Chiara.” He says, his arms still around me, holding me close. “Always, no matter what. You are my daughter, and I want you to be happy. If you are happy, then I am happy too, va bene?”
A tear slips down my cheek, but I don’t wipe it away.
Instead, I close my eyes for a moment, letting the world around me fade away.
I breathe deeply, my shoulders relaxing, my body finally settling into the warmth of Papa’s embrace.
I feel content.
As Papa’s arms tighten around me, I release a heavy sigh. And with that simple, quiet sigh, I know that whatever happens next, I’ll be okay.
Because at this moment, I’m loved. And at this moment, I’m cherished.
I have Papa’s blessings.