Chapter 30
Leah stood at the foot of her bed, staring at the dresses laid out.
A smile tugged at the corner of her lips as memories rushed through her.
Gliding her fingers over the fabric, Leah locked away each memory.
And as she folded up the dress and placed them in a trunk, she vowed never to open it again.
She didn't want Killian's memory to haunt her every thought or visit her like a specter in her dreams. His rejection shot throughout her limbs, crippling her.
Tears streamed down her cheeks as she clung to the last dress, refusing to toss it into the abyss. With tears soaking the fabric, Leah couldn't help but wonder where fate would have her end up. She had mistakenly given her heart to Killian and was paying the price.
"Why?" she mumbled into the fabric. Using the dress she had worn to the ceilidh to wipe her tears, a new spark of determination kindled within her.
"It cannae end like this, I'll nae let it. I will charge into his room and demand he explain himself. Even if he doesnae love me, he owes me an apology… an apology and money. I'll get every pence I'm worth. I'll nae have him walk all over me."
Leah rose from the floor with the aid of the bedpost. She raked the back of her hand over her upper lip as she steadied her nerves.
Although she knew Killian would turn her away, she had to see him just once more.
He hadn't come to dinner and if she was going to leave in the morning, she was going to see him once more.
Swallowing hard, Leah turned to the door and stormed from her room like a hurricane. The closer she drew to Killian's study, the uneasy she became. Her thoughts twisted as doubt sprang up, threatening to snuff out the courage she had mustered.
"I can do this," she mumbled as she stood before the door. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest as every nerve in her body tingled. She felt as if she were standing on the edge of a ship and being forced to walk the plank.
Her knuckles crashed against the hardwood.
She leaned closer, straining her ears to hear a response.
Only silence greeted her. Leah dared open the door and peer inside.
The popping of the fire gave her hope that there was someone lingering in the room.
As she stepped in, it became clearer: Killian wasn't there.
Both relief and regret scrambled her wits as she turned to leave.
"Can I help ye?" Alan asked the moment Leah turned to the door. "Were ye lookin' for the laird?"
An icy chill raced down Leah's spine as she shook her head. "I am leavin' tomorrow to tell me family in person about the weddin' and wanted to see Killian once before I left."
"I'm afraid he's nae here," Alan said as he circled her with a detestable eye.
"I can see that," she answered. "Which is why I was just leavin'."
"Why do ye nae stay for a drink?" Alan suggested as he flashed her a devilish grin.
"I daenae drink," Leah explained as she tried once again for the door. Her heart raced as if she had run across the length of Scotland. Before Alan could scoop his arm into hers and pull her deeper into the study, Leah sidestepped Alan and made a beeline for the door.
Despite being out in the open hallway with servants and guards, Leah still didn't feel safe. She bolted from the study to the stairs. The want to see Killian to say goodbye turned into a need. She needed his arms around her to calm the fears that swirled like a tempest within her.
With her heart racing, Leah reached Killian's chambers. She didn't hesitate at the door; she barged in, frantically searching for Killian. What she saw before her shattered her resolve and her heart.
"Killian?" she whimpered his name as she inched closer. He lay on the floor as blood pooled around his pale body. "Oh God, KILLIAN."
His name bounced off the walls as Leah froze in terror. Suddenly, it wasn't Killian on the floor, but her cousin.
"No, no, no," Leah panted as she blinked until she saw Killian's chambers once again. Every muscle in her body revulsed as she forced herself closer. The wounds on Killian's torso were gaping holes that just wouldn't stop.
"Someone, please!" Leah pleaded as she tore into her dress, ripping as much of the fabric as she dared to stop the bleeding.
"What is this madness?" Alan gasped. Terror rippled through Leah as she looked back at the lifeless Killian.
"I…found him like this," Leah stumbled to say through the anguish that was ripping her to pieces.
"Guards, in here now!" Alan called over his shoulder as his eyes narrowed. "Seize her."
"Wait, what?" Leah gasped as she clung to Killian with every ounce of strength she had. "Nay, ye cannae do this. I'm tryin' to help him. Please, he's dyin' ye have to let me help him."
"A likely story," Alan hissed as Fraser charged into the room with other guards eager to defend. "Fraser, take the healer to the dungeon. She will be executed for the assassination of Laird MacMillan."
"Nay," Leah screamed. "I dinnae do this. I love him. Ye cannae think I would do this."
"She was over the body," Alan said as if that was all the reasoning he needed to convict her. Panic and terror ripped through Leah as the guards slipped their hands under her arms and pried her off Killian. "Get Killian to the infirmary and see that Elsie is there. She'll ken what to do."
"Killian," Leah cried out as she struggled with brute force to no avail. No matter how much she thrashed, it did her no good. The men were too strong for her to do any damage to. It baffled her how, just two weeks ago, she had bandaged them up, and here she was, being discarded like old peelings.
The stench of the dungeons made her nose twitch as the guards tossed her into the cell. She scrambled to the iron bars as the sounds of the rats taunted her.
"Welcome to yer new estate, Lady MacMillan," the guard chuckled darkly as he dangled the key before her. "Ye can best believe we'll be havin' the time of our lives ye with."
"Killian isnae dead," Leah said through clenched teeth. "And when he wakes up and finds out what ye've done to me, ye'll wish ye would have listened to me."
"Oh, the lady of the house has claws does she? She's just as mad as the laird, tis nay wonder they found each other," the guard chuckled as he started for the door. "Two mad loons."
"Time will determine what and who I am, until then, God will avenge me," Leah said with such conviction that it rattled the guards.
She watched them sulk up the steps and out the door.
As it slammed behind them, sealing her into the dark pit, Leah crawled into the corner and pulled her knees to her chest.
"God will avenge me, daenae think I've heard that one before."
Leah didn't move as the familiar voice pricked her ears. "Leave me alone."
"Now, is that any way to treat an old lover?" Mason asked before he broke out into a coughing fit. Leah could hear the rattle in Mason's chest from where she was sitting. It was in his deep, wet cough that echoed off the dungeon walls.
"We were never lovers," Leah hissed as her thoughts drifted to Killian.
"That's nae nice to say, especially when ye've seen me naked," Mason teased.
His raspy voice unnerved Leah. Despite all that Mason had done to her, she couldn't help but feel pity for his situation.
He shouldn't be in the dungeons anymore than she should be.
But at least for her cause, she was innocent.
"I've nae seen ye naked," Leah answered. "Ye always had a towel on. If anyone caught a glimpse it would have been Elsie. She cared for ye a lot longer than I did."
"Ye’re lyin'. It was ye," Mason said as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Or maybe… I daenae ken. Sometimes I try to think about what I did, and it doesnae make sense to me. It's like me head was foggy and I could see myself doin' things, but I had nay control over them."
Leah sat up and peered through the dark and shadow to find Mason. Huddled in the corner, she spotted him digging the tip of his worn nail into the stone wall.
"Do ye remember ever gettin' dizzy?" Leah asked as she noticed his odd behavior.
"Aye, and confused. Alan would tell me that it was because I wasnae gettin' fresh air. But I'm thinkin' maybe it was somethin' to do with him."
Arching her eyebrow, Leah found herself torn. Mason had, after all, tried to kidnap her and confessed to setting up the assassination attempts. But could he have been just another puppet?
A fresh surge of worry crashed through Leah as she watched Mason lean his head against the cold stone wall.
His body rocked as he coughed and twitched.
She wished she could do something for him, but there was nothing she could do.
Someone had killed Killian… the thought of Killian dead ripped through her like a volcano tearing apart an island.
Tears flowed freely from her eyes as she looked up at the slanted window. A single star showed through the pitch-black sky, and it was to that single star Leah whispered her prayer.
Please, daenae let him be dead. I forfeit my life for his, just please, Lord, daenae take him from me. Please, I beg ye.