Chapter 2
Sitting in the lounge of his suite waiting for breakfast to be delivered, he contemplated what his options were.
He almost didn’t go on last night; he was so close to walking away, heading out of the car park and not stopping until he ran out of steam.
The fear was getting worse instead of better.
He had been down the whole ‘hippie’ route: hypnotherapy, counselling, you name it and he had probably given it a go.
He would have given anything to get back to how he used to be before it all got so crazy.
In the early days he had embraced the attention; he thrived on performing.
They would rehearse every night in either his or Ben’s garage, preparing for their regular weekend slots at several of the local bars.
It was more enjoyable then, so much more containable.
For a good few years the largest crowd they played to would have been two hundred people max at weddings and similar events.
These days the numbers ran into thousands.
They had built up a dedicated following.
The same faces would show up at the different venues they played.
The same fans still followed them to this day, remaining faithful to them.
He would spot the familiar people some nights at the stage door as they left.
The guys always made sure they spared those people time, spent a few minutes signing all the paraphernalia that would get thrust under their noses.
He was kidding himself if he thought he could do another year of this.
The mass hysteria that surrounded them was frightening.
No, he needed a break; he needed to talk to Ben.
He would listen, but more importantly he would know how best to approach the others without them flipping out.
He had a management meeting at three that afternoon then they would be shipped off to the venue to get ready for the gig.
He would catch Ben then, test the water.
“What do you mean by ‘break’ exactly? Are we talking a couple of weeks, months or something more permanent? I mean, I know how much this shit gets to you but this is what we worked our arses off for, Alex. Global domination, right?” Ben eyed him suspiciously as he strummed out some random chords on his prized cherry red guitar.
He knew Alex was keeping something back but he wasn’t going to be the one to call him on it.
“I dunno really. Couple of months. I just need to get the feeling back, you know? I hate touring. I’d be happy if we just did the TV and radio stuff, kept releasing new material.
But these massive arenas...it’s just not for me.
” Alex shrugged, concentrating on trying to peel the label off of his water bottle in one piece.
“So it’s more of a split than a break. Shit. Man, you have to talk to the others. I mean, are you sure? It’s what we dreamed about, Alex. Me and you together all those years ago.”
Alex panicked; he didn’t want to split the band, just time away from everything. “No! Not a split, but why can’t we just all do our own thing for a while? Other bands do it. I just wanna disappear for a few months, have some sort of normality. Does this shit not freak you out at all?”
Ben looked puzzled. Nothing fazed him, and if he was being honest he loved all the attention being in the limelight brought with it.
The girls throwing themselves at them was a real bonus.
Sure, Alex had taken advantage a few times.
It was hard not to when they turned up in your closet or hid in your bathroom naked and willing, but it had become boring very quickly.
They didn’t want Alex, they wanted sex with the persona, a story to tell the media; it was a very lonely existence. He was tired of it all.
“Look, we need to talk to everyone else. You can’t carry on if you feel that bad but just do me a favour.
Think about it. There are only a handful of dates left to play, and then we have a few weeks’ downtime before we’re due back in the studio.
See how you feel then. You might feel differently once we start recording again.
” Ben returned to concentrating on his guitar, humming softly as he played.
Alex wasn’t so sure he would feel anything other than the sheer desperation to get out.
Izzie had been listening in to their conversation; she wasn’t the only one who worried about her brother.
After the message he left on his parents’ answer machine she’d had one very stressed out mother to deal with.
She had to talk her down from the ensuing hysteria, promise her that she would get her brother to step back a little, take a vacation, but more importantly she promised to get him home for a few days.
Why it had become her job to sort out his whole life recently she had no idea – work, yes but everyone seemed to expect her to sort out his personal life too.
Tell Izzie, he listens to her. Izzie will make him come home.
Izzie can fix it. Everyone seemed to have forgotten it was her family too.
She really needed to talk to him about the job soon but right now she was in sister mode and needed to get her brother home.
Taking her earpiece out of her ear she handed him the envelope she had been nursing for the last few hours.
“Here, I booked the tickets this morning. We’re going home the day after the last Scotland gig.
I rang Mum. She’s excited her golden boy is coming home.
Oh, and Cam’s trying to convince Emma that they should visit at the same time.
The kids are getting big now, and he wants Uncle Alex to get to know them a little better. ”
Alex smiled broadly at the mention of his niece and nephew; he had only seen them in the flesh a handful of times.
“Thanks, Iz. I’ll ring Cam. It would be great, all of us at home for a few days.
Did you clear my schedule? Don’t make any more firm arrangements without running it by me first, okay?
” He smiled at his sister as she whipped the travel confirmation out of his hand, slipping it back inside her bag.
She didn’t trust him with anything. She knew he was useless with paperwork; she emailed him everything so he wouldn’t lose it.
Taking out his phone he dialled his brother’s number knowing full well he would just forget to ring later.
“Hey! If it isn’t the tattooed love god!
Iz told you, didn’t she?” It was great to hear his brother’s voice, it had been too long.
“I’m still working on Em but the way the kids are running her ragged at the minute, I’m sure she won’t take too much persuading!
” Alex listened to him rattle on about Em and the babies, revelling in the normality of his brother’s life.
“Listen, I have to get going in a minute. Last minute sound checks, but I’ll get Izzie to sort your flights out and book you a driver from the airport.
Don’t drive with the kids... Nah, don’t worry about it, I can’t take it with me when I die!
Besides, Em can’t argue if I’ve paid for it, can she?
Yeah, see ya.” As he put his phone away Izzie was already on to the airline making sure she got the best seats for their brother.
He deposited a kiss on her cheek as he stood to join the others.
For the first time in a long while he felt calm.
They had a day off tomorrow and then they would travel to Scotland for the last three dates of the tour. He could get through three shows.
It was after lunch when Alex woke up. His phone beeped on the nightstand. Reaching over, he tilted the screen, allowing him to see he had three missed calls and a text, all of them from Izzie. He tapped on the message to open it:
‘morning bro, gone shopping call if you need anything. Chris called, you have an interview tomorrow am with breakfast tv people, fill you in l8r x’
Oh good, another mind numbing interview to look forward to.
No doubt it would be the same old questions.
Did he have a girlfriend? How was he enjoying the tour?
What was his favourite colour? At least he wouldn’t have to think too much about his answers; breakfast TV meant an early start and he wasn’t his best in the mornings.
He was less than happy when he realised it was just him going to the interview.
Apparently the others were doing a couple of radio shows between them, leaving Alex to fly solo on TV.
Well, at least Izzie was going with him.
He’d take her out to breakfast as soon as they were done; reward for all the suffering the presenters were surely going to inflict on him.
Sitting in the make-up chair, he played games on his tablet PC as the girl worked her magic, transforming him from worn out singer to somewhere near human.
Izzie rattled off a few emails, filling him in on any important stuff as she did.
“That women’s mag are after doing another piece on the band.
They want to know if you would do a naked shoot this time.
Whatcha think, Al. You wanna flash the boys for all to see or should I decline? ”
He smirked at his sister’s humour before pretending to consider their offer. “How much are they paying? I mean, if the money’s right, I might do it.” He tried to hide his glee as a look of horror flashed across her face.
“Alex! You wouldn’t! Would you...?”
She had always been easy to wind up; right from being little he could get her every time. He threw his head back, laughing loudly as she slapped his bare forearm.
“Mr Carter...Erm can I just... your microphone. I need to mic you up. If that’s okay. I can come back if you like but you’ll be heading onto set in ten minutes so...”