Chapter 35
Oriana
“ G ood morning, Baby,” Cameron’s deep rumble roused me from my half asleep state as I waited for the coffee to brew.
“Morning,” I mumbled, not even opening my eyes from where I was slumped against the counter. Cameron chuckled and moved in behind me, kissing my neck as he hugged me.
“What do you say to us taking our pack to the flea market out in Creekwood?”
That had me finally opening my eyes and spinning in his arms. My excitement was building but that tiny part of me that kept popping up, was terrified.
These were things I did with the old Cameron.
I was having a hard time melding the two in my mind and letting go of that life before.
But the idea of showing everyone around one of my favorite places was enough to let a smile play across my lips and nod.
“Perfect,” he said, stealing a kiss before taking the mug from my hands and making me a cup of coffee.
I had yet to read through all of his letters. In fact, I hadn’t opened a single one since he gave me them all. Those years broke me in so many ways and I didn’t want to relive that pain. Especially now that I held some of the blame.
I watched him move around the kitchen, already comfortable here. In fact, the man who was making my coffee looked so much different than the one who found me when I moved back.
Without the burden and fear of never winning me back hanging over him, he seemed to stand taller and not hold the weight of the world on his back. Maybe I was crazy, but even his skin was clearer and his eyes less shadowed.
I remembered him mentioning drinking too much and I wondered if it was a lot worse than I thought.
“How are you holding up? I know it’s been a whirlwind for me, I’m sure for you, too,” I asked gently.
He stirred the creamer in before pressing the steaming mug into my hands.
“I wasn’t in a good place before everything went down. My best friend Tucker took me to this alpha camp, the one I met Tate at, actually. It was an attempt to get me away from booze and to listen. They told me you were coming that night, in fact, and sent me to get my shit together so I didn’t fuck it up again.”
“There’s no promises that one of us won’t fuck up again. But we aren’t teenagers anymore,” I said as gently as possible. We had both made plenty of mistakes. I was past the hurt enough to realize my own faults in all of this. “We talk it out and work through it. You’ve shown me that I never stopped being important and that’s a big deal to me. It means I know I can trust the man you are now. Sometimes it’s hard when we do things we used to do together. It gets in my head a bit, but I don’t want it to hold me back. Just be gentle with me today?”
He took my coffee and put it on the counter before pulling me closer. His cypress and bayberry was sweeter than ever as his purr rumbled between us. Just like that I felt settled and whole.
“Always, Baby, whatever you need.”
It was a promise that held so much hope that I couldn’t help but squeeze him back and repeat it in my head like a mantra.
My alpha had my back, just like Hudson did on our last date. Just like Roman did every day when he made me feel loved. And how Lane ensured I smiled and laughed, and Tate worked hard to make sure that the entire pack was well balanced.
I saw more and more glimpses every day that we truly were a pack now. My future had found me and was fighting hard for me to fully embrace it.
My mind flickered yet again to my unfinished nest. The closed door where I’d dropped my bags from our date yesterday and continued to ignore.
It was haunting me, taunting, every time I walked into my room. I knew I’d have to face it soon but that wasn’t going to be as easy.
One step at a time.
“So, when are we going?” I asked, even though he was oblivious to my inner deflection.
“Breakfast on the road?” he asked, grabbing a travel mug and transferring my coffee.
“Perfect, I’m going to go change,” I said, letting the anticipation build again as I took the mug and hurried upstairs. I was wide awake now and the more I thought about the Creekwood Flea market, the more excited I was.
There was a bit of everything there, along with fresh food, live music, and hidden treasures. I never once have left empty handed.
I just hoped the guys wouldn’t be too bored. Cameron always seemed to enjoy it, but getting all five of my men to not be miserable might take some work.
My phone went off as I pulled my sweater on. I grabbed it, wincing at the sight of my dad’s name on the screen. I was covered enough for a video call now, but I knew we had a lot to catch up on and I was excited to get on the road.
Knowing Brandon, he’d call back more than once if I ignored him again. I’d been awful about ignoring everyone while I figured out this whole pack thing.
“Hey, Dad,” I said in a bright tone. He glared back, seeing right through my attempts.
“Funny, I talked to you more when you were hours away, Little Bird. What the heck?”
“Sorry,” I said with a small laugh. “Life and finding a pack have been more than a little insane.”
“And how are things with Cameron? Do we still hate him?” His eyes were playful but there was a bit of that protectiveness shining through.
“I don’t think I ever hated him,” I admitted. The truth was, I loved him even when it hurt. We were mates and I didn’t think I’d ever get over him.
Now I couldn’t help but wonder if that was our bond, holding out when we didn’t think we were ever going to find our way back together.
I shuddered to think how things would have been if he’d let me go and hadn’t tried to fix things. Would I have always felt incomplete?
“Well, the jury is still out for us. But, if you’re happy and cared for, we’ll give your entire pack a chance. Just bring them around more? I miss you.”
“Miss you, too, Dad. I promise I’ll be better about calling. After this heat hits, at least. I can feel it coming but I’m in that weird limbo stage. It’s being stubborn.”
He nodded. “Yeah, it can be like that after finding a pack. Especially if you bond some but not all. It’ll even out, Little Bird. Let us know if we can do anything.”
“We will. Thank you,” I said.
He chatted about some town gossip before we said a quick goodbye. The moment I hung up, I was off in search of my pup. He’d been absent from my room and downstairs when I went down for coffee.
Which meant one of my mates stole him.
“Henry?” I called out, listening until I heard his soft padding coming from behind Tate’s door. “There you are.”
He popped out the moment I opened his door, giving me a little happy bark. “Let’s go outside.”
“He was restless last night and I didn’t want to wake you. I took him for a late night walk and brought him up here after,” Tate explained as he walked out of his closet. For a moment I forgot what we were talking about, taking in his broad chest dusted in dark hair. He wasn’t as cut as Cameron and Hudson, but still broad and strong all the same. In fact, I liked that he had a bit more softness to him.
“Mmhmm,” I managed before he put on a shirt, chuckling at me.
“None of that or we won’t get out of this house today,” Tate said, voice full of promise.
He crossed the room in two strides and tugged me close, his lips slanting over mine. My body reacted in such an intense way, heat blooming through me, legs clenching, slick pooling, that I knew my actual heat was so close.
Like it had been for fucking weeks. I swear, I just wanted it to hit so we could face it. This strange limbo of amped up emotions and heat spikes were getting old. Fast.
Going out would be the perfect distraction from the unsteady chaos that was my designation lately.
“I take it Cam messaged you?” I asked, pulling away before we could take it further. Tate looked reluctant to let me go but nodded, nostrils flaring as he breathed in the evidence that I’d liked that kiss a bit too much.
He chuckled. “Come on, let’s get this old man outside. What do you say, Henry?”
“Is old man Henry coming with us?” Lane asked excitedly as we hurried down the stairs.
I hadn’t considered it, but the flea market was open to dogs. The only issue I saw was how Henry would do around all the people and noises.
He must have seen my hesitation, quickly trying to wave it off, but Roman stepped in. He was always there to read me better than anyone else.
“How about this? If you’re worried about how he’ll do around people and the crowds, then we’ll take it slow. If he seems uncomfortable, we’ll keep our distance. If he screams his head off barking, we’ll worry about that then. But a little socializing couldn’t hurt him. And if he gets overwhelmed, there’s enough of us—we could take turns giving him walks away from the crowd.”
The idea of going without Henry broke my heart. The old man deserved to have some really good experiences, and this was our chance to give it to him.
“Then yes, I think we should take him,” I agreed quickly. “I was just worried how he’d handle so many people.”
I could already picture him winning over the hearts of literally everyone he met, just like he did with us. How he was overlooked at the shelter for so long was still insane to me.
“You have to consider he was around a lot of people at the shelter, too. They didn’t say anything about him being aggressive or bad with kids. They usually disclose if they are. I don’t think we have to worry about that,” Cameron agreed. “We’ll just pay attention to his behavior. I’m going to go pack him up some stuff now. We all know if we need him to listen, we need treats.”
We’d already discovered that Henry was very food-motivated. Be it a snack or even a drink, it had the old man perking up and looking around. The sound of a wrapper could wake him up from a dead sleep in seconds and he was always underfoot when we cooked.
He ate dog food—but only after he made sure he wasn’t going to get any of ours. If it wasn’t for the warnings about feeding table scraps, I might have caved more often. As it was, someone was always sneaking him a treat or two.
My pack was full of softies.
Henry loved every second of the car ride. This time, he wasn’t terrified and shaking, but perching himself on Tate’s lap to look out the window. He never barked, just had his little tongue out, panting happily. The window was rolled down just enough for him to get a good sniff of the outside air.
I was watching Henry while the guys were chatting around me. There were a few different conversations going on at the same time, but it wasn’t overwhelming.
In fact, I settled into my seat with a smile on my face. I think for the first time since we’d all come together, this truly felt like a settled pack. It wasn’t new, but had an old familiarity to it—like we’d been doing this for years.
There was always that fear among omegas that your pack wouldn’t get along. I had been terrified of that when we were coming together, especially that night on the dock. Now, only a few weeks later, we were already becoming a family.
Which was good because my heat was coming fast. I still needed to talk to them all again one more time about what that meant for me—specifically, being allergic to the suppressants and birth control. Obviously we’d been openly not using protection, but we haven’t had a full conversation yet and I couldn’t rest easy until we did.
The last thing I wanted to do was spend my entire life barefoot and pregnant. But I had a feeling, once I really got established with the clinic here and they spoke to my previous doctors, that hopefully we’d be able to find a new solution.
For now, I was just excited to have my pack—no barriers between us, no bickering, just everyone getting along like we’d been together for years.
I’d always hoped that my pack would have that underlying friendship like my parents’ pack did.
Sure, my mom wasn’t the loving type, but Brandon more than made up for it. There were a lot of things I would have changed about my childhood, but the way they were with each other always made it fun.
There was teasing and talking, always something to do, someone around to help when you needed it.
Even though I wished my mom had been around more emotionally, I never felt neglected. Not once.
I truly wish that everyone in this pack could say the same. At least, I knew damn well that if we had a baby together, they would have a childhood like mine.
The flea market was in full swing by the time we got there. Henry hopped out of the car, his tail already wagging a mile a minute and nose pointed in the air as Tate took the lead.
It was funny how my oldest alpha, who had adamantly wanted a cat not a dog, had, apparently, become Henry’s caretaker.
They’d become old friends over morning coffees and bone broth.
“Oh my god, look at the puppy!” I heard a child’s voice yell out. He was running towards us at full speed before his parents could stop him—though they were trying.
I tensed, freezing as I watched, but Tate was faster. He bent down and scooped up Henry in one arm so the kid came colliding with his thighs instead.
The parents apologized profusely, but Henry was letting out a whimper, trying to lean down to the kid. Everything about it screamed friendly. I may have swooned a little bit when Tate crouched down to the kid’s level, putting Henry within reach but still controlling the situation.
“He’s new to us. We just adopted him, and I don’t think he’s been around a lot of kids, so can you be gentle?” Tate asked, his voice soothing but holding an edge of sternness that meant the kid was wide-eyed, nodding along.
He heeded Tate’s words. His hand reached out slowly, and then giggles erupted the moment it came into contact with Henry, who licked him furiously, tail wagging even more.
“No harm done,” Tate said, giving the parents a smile. “I just scooped him up because he’s new to this. We’ve only had him a few days.”
“Thanks for understanding,” the kid’s dad said as he scooped his son up with an exasperated eye roll. “Boy, you don’t run across the parking lot like that!”
“Sorry, Papa,” the boy said, attempting to look properly chastised, though his eyes sparkled with excitement as he continued to look at Henry. “Can we get a puppy?”
With a quick goodbye, the family was gone, trying to convince their eager son the timing wasn’t right.
And with them, went my fears. Tate put Henry back on the ground, and he practically pulled us through to the market.
In fact, Henry was living his best life, getting an insane amount of attention. Every few feet, somebody was crouching down to give him scratches and love, talking to him in baby voices, and he ate it up.
We did have to dodge a few dropped treats on the floor so he didn’t make himself sick, but with all of us watching out, Henry was safe.
It also gave me the perfect distraction to ease into the market without getting in my head. We may have rescued Henry, but he also did the same for me.
We wandered through the aisles of the farmers’ market, taking it all in but not really stopping—we didn’t want to buy food today.
My eyes were already set on the antique booths ahead.
“At least we know where to come when we need a fresh round of fruits and vegetables,” Hudson commented as we passed the stalls stacked full from local farms. “It’ll take everything in me to get vegetables into this group.”
“Speaking of vegetables,” Cameron said, a smirk on his face, “come on, Baby. Our favorite booth is just up here.”
I let out a squeal of excitement and slid my hand in his, letting him pull me ahead, right for the funnel cakes.
“Are you kidding me? How is this ‘speaking of vegetables’ you brat?” Hudson asked, exasperated. As if to prove a point, he veered towards the fruit stand, buying a bag and filling it with a few different things to snack on today.
I appreciated his commitment to keeping us healthy, but I also appreciated that Cameron wasn’t going to deny me something as amazing as a funnel cake.
“Do you still want it the same way?” he asked.
“A chocolate drizzle? Absolutely, I do,” I said with a grin. Looking up at my alpha brought back memories, but this time I didn’t shy away from them.
In my memories, he was younger. His hair less shaggy and lighter from the summer sun, but his smile was almost the same. Just a few fine lines around the edges of his eyes now, showing he’d been giving that same grin for years.
My heart swelled in my chest and tears burned at my eyes as I accepted both versions of my alpha. He had made me who I was back then, but this new version had my whole heart and soul now and I knew this time it was forever.
“Wait, chocolate is an option?” Lane gasped, poking his head between us and ruining the moment as he looked over the menu. “Holy shit, they’ve got a whole list!”
Cam shook his head but never lost that smile as he stared right back at me.
“You okay?” he asked silently and I nodded, letting Lane steal my attention so things didn’t get heavy.
“They do. Cam and I tried quite a few combinations before we settled on this one. I think it’s the best, but they also have a chocolate churro option that is phenomenal. It just can get a little messy.”
“Ooh, sign me up for that one! I didn’t know that was even a thing,” Lane said, his energy rubbing off on me so I felt his same excitement. It was like seeing this place for the first time all over again.
A quick look behind me told me that not one of my guys was unhappy about being here.
“Look, Hudson,” Roman deadpanned, silver eyes dancing with laughter. “They even have strawberry topping. We found the health food.”
Hudson took a pointed bite of an apple and glared at us, but I knew damn well he was going to partake in our sweet treat, too. He never shied away from junk food before, he just tried to make us eat healthier when he could.
And he had a point. Now that we were all living together, I needed to do a little better about cooking proper meals.
Or I guess I should say we —it wasn’t all on me anymore.
That was nice to admit.
Cameron bought everyone funnel cakes, and we nibbled on them as we walked through the aisles of booths, offering dog treats to Henry to appease him.
Though I watched him lick powdered sugar-coated fingers a time or two.
When we finally reached the antique and handmade craft booths, I was ready. The sugar had given me a bit of an energy boost, and I rolled up the sleeves of my sweater as I took it all in.
“Now you guys get to see her work,” Cameron muttered under his breath. It was playful and exasperated at the same time.
This was my happy place and I wasn’t going to hold back or hide who I was. They needed to see me, even in my crazy shopping frenzy.
I promptly ignored them all as I browsed each table, picking through to separate the junk from the true antiques.
Until I got a face full of dust that ended in a coughing fit. I nearly wheeze laughed when three of my mates pulled out my extra inhalers. I took Roman’s and used it before handing it back.
“Glad to know some things never change,” Cameron teased, but I didn’t do anything more than roll my eyes before diving back in.
There was not a single complaint as I bought and handed over one thing after another until each of them had a bag or two hanging from their arms.
Thankfully, this time I didn’t run into anything big. It was all just small trinkets or books. Outside of the jackpot of vintage Christmas decorations I found. I could already picture in my head the holiday displays that I could do with this one.
As I stepped away from the final table, a big smile on my face, I realized I’d done it. Not only had I come in the first place, I’d enjoyed myself completely, no holding back.
There wasn’t a single question or worry over what Cam and I had, only appreciation of how it had changed.
In fact, my trust in him was stronger.
He’d organized this for me, had made sure our pack had come together, not just us.
He could have been selfish and claimed this date for himself, but he included our entire pack in something that was originally just ours. Not only had it eased me in, but it brought us all closer together, and I was grateful for that.
As I handed over another antique to Cameron, I leaned up and kissed him. “Thanks for today. It meant a lot.”
“Happy to do it, Baby,” he promised. “This is just the first of many.”
“And you’re not leaving us behind next time,” Lane said. He held up the treasure he found. It was a painting of a lake surrounded by trees. It was beautiful, and the blend of colors was vibrant and breathtaking. “Look, I found this gem for the living room.”
“I love it,” I said, smiling even wider at the fact that they were starting to make the house theirs as well. I wanted it to be our home, and they didn’t hesitate to step in and do just that.
“Do you want to get anything for your nest? There’s a nesting supply booth over there,” Roman asked.
Despite how open I’d been with Roman about pretty much everything else, this was the one thing that I’d conveniently ignored through all of our relationships.
It was something I’d have to get my shit together with, really fucking soon. So, instead of addressing the elephant in the room, I followed where he was pointing, walking ahead of them so they couldn’t see the panic on my face.
I fixed it before I got there, smiling sweetly at the excited group of omegas behind it.
The guy showed me a few things, and I added about half of them to the growing pile. I picked up a few things in my own style that would probably go in my bedroom, and that was okay.
Or at least, that’s what I was telling myself.
Cameron insisted on paying and shockingly no one protested.
Now that the guys were loaded down with bags, we had no choice but to head back to the car, hoping we had enough room to put it all in.
I ignored the uneasy feeling that was growing in my stomach and focused on the fact that Henry was passed out, belly up, on Hudson’s lap, and that every single one of my guys was relaxed and happy.
No matter what, this day had been a success.
But I knew the moment that they tried to put these things in my nest, I’d have to face the fact that I no longer knew how to be an omega, or how to make myself nest without breaking down.