18. Catriona #2
We all laugh, even Rian. A low rumbling laugh that shakes me like a small earthquake from the top of my head all the way to my toes.
“My brother’s a great guy, but he’s not into dating.” Eric raises his eyebrows at Mona’s puzzled expression. “He has special needs, and girls – or boys – have never been on his agenda.”
An awkwardness settles over the table, all too familiar for Eric and me, no one knowing the right thing to say. Rian is the one who saves the situation.
“Friends of mine have a four-year-old with special needs. He’s a great character, but his parents say it can be hard work.”
“It can be, no doubt about that.”
“It must be hard for him when you’re away for such long periods at a time.” Gemma blinks up at Eric with so much compassion, it almost makes me uncomfortable.
“I’m sure it is, but to be honest with you, I think it’s worse for me. I’m constantly worrying about him being safe.” Eric soaks up the emotions that Gemma projects.
“I guess you’re fully booked catching up with your brother, friends and family the next two weeks, then?” She bites her lower lip.
“That wasn’t very subtle,” Mona pretends to whisper to Gemma, and I can’t help my snicker.
Eric grins and winks to my red-haired colleague. “It’s pretty busy, I have to admit. But I might have a free spot or two…”
Gemma leans to Mona and speaks through the side of her mouth. “Subtle or not, it worked!”
Rian chuckles next to me and his arm brushes mine, only his thin shirt separating our skin.
My stomach clenches and I’m torn between wanting to pull away and wanting to press firmer against him.
As the banter continues around us, I’m acutely aware of his every move, how his muscles shift under his shirt, the grip of his strong fingers around his pint, the timbre of his voice.
“Hey, Cat,” Eric says, and I force my focus to him. “I ran into Damien yesterday when I was out for drinks with the fellas from school. He asked about you.”
I sense Rian’s eyes on me just as clearly as I feel his body tense, yet again.
“That’s nice. How’s he keeping?”
“He’s doing well. He’s working for a small accounting firm in Phibsborough.
” There’s a pregnant pause where I desperately try to come up with something to ask other than the obvious question.
I hide it by sipping my gin. Eric takes it upon himself to fill me in, his eyebrows dancing.
“He’s not seeing anyone at the moment. Seemed to be very curious whether you are, too. ”
My cheeks warm and I trace a drop of condensation down the slope of my glass.
“Oh, is there some history here? Do you have a secret admirer?” Gemma’s face glows in excitement.
“Well, he would have to be admiring her from afar not to get frostbite from the ice queen,” Rian snaps. He clears his throat and adds in a softer tone, although with a challenging edge to his words, “Isn’t that right, Miss Taylor?”
That press of his arm.
“You should know, Mr Kearney. Your behaviour puts you on the receiving end of my frost every day,” I bite back.
“So, what’s the story here?” Eric interrupts, raising an eyebrow. “Why do you call him ‘Mr Kearney’? You can’t call him Rian like everyone else when you’re out for a drink?”
“Mr Kearney has never bestowed the honour upon me to address him in such an informal way,” I say in a pretend snooty accent while lifting my chin.
“I would only bestow that honour on people I trust with my life,” Rian counters.
“In other words, you trusted me the second you laid eyes on me?” Eric presses his hand to his chest. “I am indeed honoured.”
“You’re one of the protectors of this world, of course I trust you.” The corners of Rian’s mouth lift.
“Just make sure you treat this cousin of mine like the precious diamond she is, ’cause if you don’t, you should trust me no more!”
Did Eric just flex his muscles?
“Don’t you know that diamond is the strongest material in the world?
It takes an awful lot to break this lady.
” Rian somehow seems to stand taller, looking down at Eric, while keeping the smile on his face.
A slightly condescending smile. The space between the men appears tighter, suffocating me in the middle.
“True, maybe I should warn you about being cut by her, instead of worrying about you crushing Cat.”
“Guys, stop it.” I snort and roll my eyes in an attempt to rescue the situation. It may only be banter, but I sense a dark undertone to their conversation, leaving me tense. Having Rian so close doesn’t help. “Eric, I’ll get your next drink, same again?”
“No, I’ll get this round.” He reaches for his phone.
“You’re taking me to dinner. The least I can do is buy you a drink!” My voice is sharper than intended.
“Fine. Sure. Another Heineken then,” he says and nods to his glass.
I step off the stool. Rian steadies me as my feet hit the floor, his grip tighter than it needs to be around my upper arm.
Unwanted heat surges in my core. I look up for a split second, seeing his face devoid of emotion.
But his gaze is flashing as it meets mine, and I quickly move away, seeking refuge at the bar.
While counting my breaths, I try to compose myself. It’s too much for me being next to Rian like this. The barman finally comes to me, and I place my order. Closing my eyes, I continue to take deep breaths. Calm, calm.
My lids fly open with the heat from another body behind me.
I don’t need to turn, I know it’s him. He leans one arm on the bar, half covering my body with his. We stand like that in a tense silence, my breath no longer deep, but shaky.
“So, who is Damien?” Rian finally says. Long and strong fingers tap the bar top. Fingers that reached so far inside of me.
I clear my throat twice before the words come out evenly.
“He’s an old friend. We went to school together.”
“Just…a friend?” There is an edge to his words.
“We dated for a while.”
My breath hitches as he brushes his fingers over my cheek, burning a path on my skin, and tucks a lock of hair behind my ear. A throbbing starts low in my stomach.
“You look nice.”
Heat blooms in my chest.
“I—” Relief and disappointment war within me when the barman chooses this moment to bring my drinks. I grab them and flee from Rian. He doesn’t join us at our table again, but my cheek doesn’t stop tingling.
***
“I thought you said only one drink?” Eric comments as I take a deep lungful of the spring air out on the street.
“I had to give you a fair chance to get Gemma’s number.”
“I thank you for that.” He grins but then his brows furrow. “So, what’s going on between you and Rian?”
“Ach, we just don’t gel. I call him out on his shortcomings, and he doesn’t like it, as you may understand.” I hike my bag higher up on my shoulder, hoping that’s the end of the conversation.
“That’s not what I meant. Actually, the opposite. There’s a lot of tension between the two of you, and you’re flirting like mad.”
“We’re not!” I turn to him, gaping. Surely, we don’t flirt!
“Be careful, Cat. Getting involved with the boss is never a good idea. You of all people should know that.”
The words are like a punch to the stomach.
“Don’t worry, there’s nothing going on,” I insist again, hating the way my voice sounds off, hating that I lied, hating that his words hurt so badly.