14. Lyric
LYRIC
I ’m an idiot. That’s what I keep saying in my head over and over again.
Jagger stayed until he couldn’t anymore with having a new-to-him fur baby at his house, so he offered for me to come with him.
I could either stay the night, or he’d drive me back to my house.
I thought the idea was absurd. For one, I’d have followed him in my own car, then come back.
He did enough yesterday. It sucked for me to turn down going to his house as it was, especially after the three orgasms he delivered.
My legs were so weak they shook when I stood up to clean myself.
Another task Jagger offered to do, but there are other things a woman needs to tend to, and I gave him a little bit of entertainment as I shuffled into the attached bathroom.
Our combined fluid definitely slid down the insides of my thighs, but I guess that’s the price you pay for not using condoms. Jagger didn’t have any on him, we both discussed the whole being clean deal, and I’m on a new birth control to try and help with my stupid heavy periods.
This month and next will be the real test to see if it helps the cramps and flow or if I’ll have to call my doctor to ask for something else yet again.
I came back to bed after taking care of business, and when I saw Jagger there, leaning against the headboard, still naked, I knew what I’d be doing.
He patted his thigh, but instead of sitting on his lap, I crawled between his legs, my hand wrapping around his hard length.
I lowered my head, and he guided me until he couldn’t take it anymore.
We made another mess, but this time, Jagger pulled out at the last minute, replaced his cock with his fingers, and finished all over my body.
We were both exhausted after that. It also meant our time came to an end.
Did I mention how much of an idiot I am?
He left for his house, and I stayed at mine, where I got absolutely zero sleep, regretting not taking him up on his offer.
A few days ago, I had finally gotten used to the noises around the bed and breakfast, then last night came.
I tossed and turned, sat up in bed more times than staying horizontal, and when the sun finally rose, I decided enough was enough.
The box in the corner taunted me, sitting opened, a couple of stacks on the ground, and abandoned. Jagger didn’t want to read my letters, and I didn’t either at that point. He’s right about letting things go, yet I still wanted to read what he wrote me.
I made it two letters in before I had to stop.
The wound was ripped open, and the tears kept coming, one after the other.
I tucked the back of my legs to my thighs, wrapped my arms around them, and buried my head to hide myself away from the outside world, my hair helping do the majority of the work, and let myself sob.
We’ve missed out on so much time together, the hurt knowing my parents, one or the other or maybe both, kept us a part, and I didn’t know how to process it.
A few minutes later, my phone rang, and thankfully, the person on the other end of the line talked me through it.
Naomi, my second mom and built-in best friend.
Sadly, she had no answers. Mom never spoke about it to her, only talked about how I walked about looking like a lost soul for nearly a year.
No truer words have ever been spoken. My heart and my head were a mess.
I’d wandered around in a daze wondering what I did to make Jagger go ghost mode.
When Naomi and I hung up, I packed everything back into the box, took a long hot shower, and then made my bed, got myself together, and called Jagger.
I had a moment of apprehension thinking it’d be too early, but he picked up on the first ring, and before I could ask what he was doing, Jagger told me to either get to his house, or he’d be at my house in twenty minutes.
I had no food or a place to cook said food or prepare it, the price I knew I’d have to pay during the renovation process, and one I knew would be worth it.
I offered to pick up groceries to make breakfast or to run to the diner, yet once again, Jagger had it covered.
That leads me to now, walking up to Jagger’s home. My eyes go every which way, a lot like they did when I turned onto his dirt road. I should have known he’d have a home off the beaten path, away from the busier side of town, with more grass, trees, and lush landscape as far as the eye can see.
“Hey, you find the place alright?” Jagger opens the front door and walks out wearing a pair of black shorts sitting low on his hips and nothing else.
“I did. It’d be hard to miss. A turn here, a turn there, and then travel down the dirt road till I see your mailbox.
” He gave me his address plus directions in case my cell phone service went in and out.
He takes the steps off his front porch, never taking his eyes off mine, making me move my own feet.
When we meet halfway, Jagger’s head dips, his lips go to mine, and my eyes close.
This feeling of rightness, the way his arm wraps around my back, pulling me into his warmth as he deepens the kiss, it’s like no time has passed.
While his tongue chases mine, the tips of my fingers dig into his lower abdomen, and just like every time we kiss, my brain turns off.
There’s no thinking, there’s no worry, and time is at a standstill.
It’s only the man in front of me and no one else.
“Fuck, would have loved to have you in my bed this morning, waking you up like this, but I get it,” Jagger relays the message, similar to what he told me last night when I walked him to my door to say good night.
“I hate to admit when I’m wrong, but I fear in this instance, you might have been right. I didn’t sleep a wink last night.” I attempt to pull back from him. Jagger being Jagger isn’t having any of it.
“Should have called, texted, emailed. I’d have loaded up in my truck to come and get you.
No more of that, yeah?” I’m about to respond when I hear a certain noise come from between us.
Jagger Steele, the big muscular Viking-like god, is holding his kitten in the crook of his arm.
“See, even she agrees with me,” he says with a wink.
“We’ll see, though I’ll warn you. Sleeping with me won’t be a lot of fun. I tend to move non-stop, so you can forget about getting any rest.” I look from him to the black kitten. One paw is lifting up to explore Jagger’s chest, and I don’t blame her one bit. “Want to introduce me to your friend?”
“This is Shadow. She’s a goofy thing. Bought her more cat beds than an animal should have, yet she chooses to sleep on dirty piles of clothes.
” I extend a finger at her nose, waiting to see what she’ll do before I pet her.
When Shadow nudges me for more, I take her word for it and slide two fingers back and forth on her head.
She makes a buzzing noise, soft and continuous. “I think she likes me.”
“What’s not to like, Lili?” Jagger is biased, but that’s okay because so am I when it comes to him.
“By the way, I don’t want to know how you know you move non-stop or who told you that, but I’ll be fine.
You pack a bag, or are we driving back to your place later today to do so?
” He cocks an eyebrow, and his upper lip lifts, giving me a playful smirk.
“Nobody told me. The proof is in my bed sheets every morning as well as my pillows being tossed on the ground. It’s good to know you don’t like hearing about my past, though, and I don’t need to know yours, either.
” I wrinkle my nose, causing Jagger to laugh, low and throaty.
It makes my pulse quicken. He must see what he’s doing to me with the way his look turns dark and seductive.
“Didn’t answer my question about clothes.
You can wear mine or none at all. As for a toothbrush, I’ve got a spare from the dentist in the drawer.
” I haven’t said yes, no, or maybe, and he’s making plans for tonight.
It looks like I’m staying with him, since I’m unable to put up a fight, because a peaceful night of sleep, with Jagger wrapped around me and Shadow snuggled at our feet, sounds perfect.
The last part he’s unaware of yet, it might take some persuading, and I’m not afraid to use any method imaginary to make it happen.
“I can see how this is going to work. You’re barely dressed, therefore I’ll be barely dressed, and we’ll be one happy barely dressed household?
” I joke, not caring in the least about what Jagger wears.
As for me, I’ll be pilfering a T-shirt, one I’ll more than likely hide in my purse in order to wear at home.
You know, when I grow a pair of lady balls and don’t blurt out how badly my insomnia gets to me in new places.
Naomi mentioned earlier today to buy a radio to play music, or a sound machine.
I heard Scott in the background mention a fan.
That’s not a bad idea, either. While tonight should be fine at Jagger’s house, there’s always tomorrow night.
Which means I’ll be making a stop at the big box store in town, and I’ll probably purchase all three, because who knows what will work best for me?
“Now she’s getting it.” Jagger’s hand slides to my lower back, and he guides me up the front porch steps and into his house.
The front porch beckons me to make a cup of coffee and sit in one of the rocking chairs he has to one side.
There are two with an end table in the middle.
On the other side is a hanging porch swing, another chair, plus a smaller table to put your drink on.
This has Eleanor written all over it, pure comfort to complete Jagger’s style.
The taupe and cream rock facade on the bottom half the house, siding that’s darker in color on top, and the wooden gables scream no white and pristine is allowed in his domain.
The best part is, it’s sheer perfection.
“Did you build your home?” I ask, more than ready for the answer to be yes.
“Yeah, about ten years ago. I got tired of staying in a camper at the laydown yard. Took me quite a while since I didn’t want to cut corners.
Also knew this would be my place forever.
The backyard is the only thing I took care of when I moved in; made for a heck of a mess. Not the best thinking on my part.”
“It’s beautiful. Would you be opposed to eating breakfast out here?” I cross my fingers behind my back. I can imagine having a plate on my lap, my feet propped up on the railing while listening to the sounds of nature.
“Fuck yeah. Let’s go on inside. I’ll let Shadow do her thing.
We’ll plate our food and post up out front.
” When Jagger opens the door, I’m in awe once again.
Walnut-colored wood floors greet me, and the stone from outside is carried through on one wall in the living room, the same one that has a fireplace built in, a massive television hanging above it, and a big, oversized couch with two chairs on either side.
“I’ll give you the tour later. Food’s ready, and I’m sure you’re starving.
” I turn around after he drops Shadow on the small bed in the corner near the wood burning fireplace.
She kneads the fluffy fabric as if she’s making biscuits, does a small circle, spinning around, and curls into herself like a croissant.
Jagger has done an amazing job for himself.
He’s always had big dreams, had a penchant for the fast life in the form of racing cars, and I find myself wanting to wander through the entire house instead of eating.
My stomach growling tells me otherwise, so I follow Jagger into the kitchen, where I’m yet again surprised.
There’s a smorgasbord of food, way more than two people need.
There’s a bowl of fruit, a platter of biscuits, a pot of sausage gravy, another bowl filled with scrambled eggs, and, last but not least, bacon.
“Umm, Jagger, I think you made enough for three families,” I say as he’s filling up two mugs of coffee.
“There’s a reason for that, one I’m hoping like hell doesn’t happen.
The guys, they’ve been known to bounce around from place to place, bring their wives and children.
It’s usually one or two of them, plus it’s not every day I get a chance to have breakfast in the company of my woman.
How do you want your coffee?” We’ve been so wrapped up in our stuff, I haven’t asked how the guys are doing.
As teenagers, we’d all been around one another, though not nearly as much as I was with Jagger.
The guys would say hi, give me a hug, ask how I was doing or if I needed a ride, but it was more in a neighborly kind of way.
“Cream and sugar, heavy on the cream or milk. Whatever you have is fine. Will you catch me up on the guys while we eat?”
“I’ll tell you anything you want to know.” Jagger’s blue eyes lift to mine, and he shoots a heated look my way, causing a warm tingle to rush to my core.
He looks at me like I’m the only person in the world who matters.