CHAPTER TWO
‘Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?’
‘That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,’ said the Cat.
‘I don’t much care where—’ said Alice.
‘Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,’ said the Cat.
Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland
The flight from Panama to Heathrow landed at half past seven the next morning. Sage had managed to hurriedly pack most of their possessions into a steamer trunk and two carry-on bags; the rest she left behind with no regrets.
After twenty-four hours of travelling which consisted of a taxi ride, a ferry boat and then two connecting flights, Sage and Hal were exhausted. Hal had been an angel the entire way, and Sage wondered if he was almost as relieved as she was to have left the island.
Hal sat on the empty trolley, watching the tired travellers circling the luggage carousels with curious, wide eyes.
He was clutching his grubby, silk-edged muslin and the iPad Santiago had given him for Christmas; he now took this everywhere, and Sage loathed it.
He had watched films for the first part of the flight then slept for the rest and Sage felt grateful to her core that he was such a sweet-natured, easy-going child.
He was bundled up in a thick woollen fisherman’s jersey that had once belonged to Sage, and which she had taken to Panama purely out of sentimentality.
It had long since shrunk, but was still far too big for Hal, and although he also had the blanket from the aeroplane that the air hostess had kindly wrapped around his little shoulders as they had disembarked, his slim brown ankles peeped out from beneath light cotton trousers and he wore only thin plimsolls on his feet.
He was beginning to shiver. Sage did not have any winter clothing for him, as Panama never got very cold.
Hal had been back to England once before but he was totally unprepared for the chill of the country in midwinter.
‘First stop, Marks and Spencer, to buy you some winter woollies, darling!’ she said, laughing at his bemused expression and dropping a reassuring kiss on his golden hair while trying to do maths in her head.
Her emergency-running-away funds were very low.
‘Right, you keep a lookout for the pirate chest while I call Uncle Casper to see if he’s here yet. ’
Sage looked up at the baggage reclaim screen while rummaging in her bag for the cheap pay-as-you-go phone she had bought before she left Panama.
She prayed that her twin brother would be there; she doubted that she could afford a taxi all the way back to Newmarket where her grandparents lived.
‘Tocumen, number six!’ she trilled, trying to sound as though life was a huge adventure as she pinned the phone between her ear and shoulder so that she could steer the unruly trolley to collect their luggage.
She wondered how much the call would cost from the Panamanian number; she hoped she had enough credit.
The trolley decided it wanted to go in a different direction and she was stifling back obscenities when Casper answered.
‘I’m nearly there!’ he said, laughing. ‘I’m just pulling off the motorway now. Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten you. I’ll be ten minutes, tops.’
Sage let out a sigh of relief. Casper was notoriously unreliable about anything other than racing and looking out for his sister, and she had spent the entirety of the flight fretting that he would not be there to meet them, along with so many other things that were plaguing her unsettled mind.
Her brother was unfailingly kind and caring but he was also manically busy.
She could tell he’d been surprised to hear her shaking voice on the phone yesterday, as they hadn’t spoken since before Santiago had smashed her phone.
The fact that he had been happy to come and collect them meant a great deal to Sage.
Casper was always up early for training, but it was a busy time in the season and his schedule would be packed.
‘Thank you, thank you! Can’t wait to see you!’ She just had to pretend she was all right for a little bit longer, and soon she’d be home.
The large steamer trunk soon appeared and a considerate gentleman helped her to heave it off the conveyor belt and onto the trolley.
Hal happily clambered on top of it and sat there regally, like a mini rajah on a throne, while Sage carefully negotiated the wayward trolley through customs and duty free, finally making it out through the electric doors and into the arrivals hall, where they were greeted by an icy blast of winter air.
‘Mumma, I’m cold!’ wailed Hal; he looked at Sage in bewilderment and began to properly shake. His lips were turning blue.
Sage wrapped her arm around him, but she was hardly dressed for January in England herself.
She frantically looked around for her brother, anxious to get straight into the warmth of the car.
There was a crowd of people waiting to collect passengers; she searched the sea of expectant faces, hoping to pick out her twin’s familiar features, but could not.
Damn it, Casper, she mentally berated him but in a gaily sing-song voice, said, ‘Uncle Casper will be here soon, darling, and he’ll put the heater on full blast for you in the car,’ while wondering what on earth she was going to do until he arrived.
‘Boo!’ said a familiar voice in her ear.
‘Casper!’ Sage cried, turning around to find her brother grinning broadly and with a cup of hot chocolate in each hand.
Tears spilt from her sore eyes. It was such a relief to see him.
It was the first time in twenty-four hours she could allow herself to even marginally relax.
The whole flight she had spent in a state of extreme agitation, body clenched and her head aching from stress.
Her shoulders were still rigid with tension and worry but now she leant against her brother for a moment, feeling his solid, comforting warmth.
‘Hello, sister,’ he said simply, putting his arms around both of them.
She clung to him tightly, feeling the seemingly permanent knot of churning unease in her stomach calm a little.
She did not know if volatile Santiago would pursue them but she felt safer standing here beside the reassuring solidity of her brother.
She pressed her face into his coat to hide her tears from Hal.
She wiped her eyes, wincing as she touched the delicate bruised bones, and finally let go of Casper.
He looked into her face. She didn’t have to say anything more, she simply squeezed his hand.
Turning to Hal, swallowing down his own emotions, Casper said to his nephew, ‘Hi, buddy! Look how big you are! Come here and give your uncle a squeeze. I’ll warm you up – look, we can both fit in this huge coat.
’ Casper gathered the eager child into his arms and wrapped him up inside his Puffa, then took one of the hot chocolates back from Sage.
‘Drink this, Hal – it’s yummy and warm. You do like chocolate, don’t you?
’ he asked, jokingly. Hal nodded enthusiastically and Casper carefully handed him the cup.
Then he turned back to Sage, putting a warm hand on her arm.
‘The car isn’t far, we just need to go up in the lift and it’s only a short walk from there. Are you all right with that trolley?’
‘Oh yes,’ she said, looking at Hal’s beaming face and the generous covering of chocolate already around his mouth. Snugly wrapped up in Casper’s coat and happily clutching the cup in both hands, he was warming up at last. ‘I’m fine, let’s go.’
They found Casper’s muddy Land Rover easily, into the back of which he loaded all of the luggage. ‘Where does the rugrat sit?’
Sage’s heart sank; she had forgotten the car seat.
‘I’d better have him on my lap … Can we stop and get him a proper car seat on the way?’
‘Sure.’ Casper looked relaxed but he was shrewdly watching his sister for a response as he added, ‘And shall we find somewhere to buy you both some warm clothes? Your lips are turning purple to match that eye.’ Despite his casual tone, anger burnt in his veins. He wanted to kill Santiago.
She was careful not to react, but looked down at her knees in embarrassment.
‘Yes, please. Somewhere not too expensive, though.’
After a few minutes, Casper pulled into a retail park just off the motorway and parked in front of a huge John Lewis store that was just opening. He jumped out of the car, leaving it running with the heaters on.
‘What clothes size is Hal? What size are you, for that matter?’
She hesitated. She probably had about two hundred pounds left in her severely depleted bank account.
‘Hal is almost four but he’s quite tall – he’s probably age five in clothes, an eleven in shoes. I’m a size ten for clothes. Shall I come with you?’ She was getting out of the car.
‘No, stay in the warm with Hal. I’ll be as quick as I can.’
‘Wait!’ Sage delved into her bag for her wallet.
‘Don’t be silly. Think of it as a welcome-home gift. Sage, I am just so happy to have you safely back in Blighty.’ Casper promptly turned and loped off on long legs before she could argue.
While she was waiting for him, her eyes caught on her third finger. She slid off the gold wedding ring, a stark band of pale skin now exposed where it had been. That would take some getting used to. She would change her name back, too. It would feel good to be Sage Beaumont again.