6. Amy
Chapter 6
Amy
M y short walk with Novak was nearly silent, but as we approached the single-story building that was the garage entrance to the Blood ‘til Dawn compound, the urge to speak my mind grew overwhelming.
Summoning courage I didn’t know I had, I turned in front of Novak to block his path.
“I just want to say thank you, sincerely. For taking me in from the sun, the room, your blood, the food, everything. Whatever your history with them is,” I flung an arm out toward the garage behind me, “it doesn’t take away from the kindness you showed me today. I won’t ever forget it and I’m… I’m glad I met you, Novak.”
He met my eyes for the first time since we left his house, but remained silent for several long seconds, his expression unreadable.
Finally a crack showed in that cold exterior, and I saw the tip of one fang bared in a slow smile. “I’m glad I met you too, Amy. It was… ” he paused, his smile fading as he searched for a polite word. “… nice having your presence in my home.”
What a word choice. I had a feeling that nice was anything but a compliment.
“I’ll miss your probing questions,” he added teasingly. “I’ll have to encourage my staff to ask more. Or else I’ll be explaining my family history to the walls.”
“Well, I mean we might still see each other around, right?” I couldn’t suppress the hopefulness in my voice. “We live close enough to each other.”
Novak ducked his head, swiftly stepping around me to walk up to the garage’s side door, where he pounded his fist three times. “That’s not likely to happen, I’m afraid.”
The door opened before I could ask why, and then things happened too fast for me to track. There was a snarling noise, and then Novak was being dragged inside by two fists gripping his jacket.
“Novak!” A rush of sudden, instinctive urgency took over me. He was mine and something was attacking him, taking him from me.
With no time to dwell on that thought, I followed him through the door, my vision red and my fangs long and snapping. Not to feed, but to use as weapons.
Novak was pinned to the wall by two other vampires. They braced their hands against his shoulders and elbows, their grips unrelenting.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Novak of Rathka’s Order?” a third vampire asked coolly, hanging back. I recognized him as Thorne, the head of Blood ‘til Dawn. From what little I knew, he was essentially the king of vampires.
“Get off of him!” I snarled at the two restraining Novak, who wasn’t even fighting back. “Let him go, you psychos!”
They ignored me while Thorne moved in and began searching Novak’s pockets. At his slightest flinch, one of the vampires braced his massive forearm against Novak’s throat.
“Don’t touch him, you animals!” I cried. “He just walked me over here. What the hell is your problem?”
Two more people rushed in from the house, and I knew by scent alone that it was Tavia and Cyan. They did nothing to stop the assault while the big vampire said to Novak, “Try anything, Rathka’s Bastard, and I’ll crush your fucking windpipe.”
Novak, to his credit, did not look threatened or the least bit afraid. “Noted,” he drawled.
I, on the other hand, couldn’t compose myself to the same degree. How could I when Blood ‘til Dawn was treating him like a criminal?
“You guys are crazy! Let him go! He didn’t do anything!”
“Amy, you don’t know what his kin have done to us,” said one of the vampires pressing Novak to the wall. “They almost killed Cyan.”
My attention turned to Tavia, who was looking at Cyan like the sun set and rose on him. “Is that true?” she asked, glancing at me for a moment before returning her gaze to him. “ His clan were the ones who injured you that night?”
I wasn’t sure what Novak’s clan had to do with the last twenty-four hours, or why he was currently being restrained because of what other people had supposedly done.
Cyan kept his gaze fixated on the only innocent vampire in the room, as far as I was concerned. Even if he wasn’t physically holding Novak down, he was complicit by just standing there and doing nothing.
“Yes. Thorne and I were attacked by the remnants of Rathka’s Order that night,” Cyan confirmed. “Novak here is the only of them left who isn’t a cannibalistic monster.”
“A title I’m happy to carry,” Novak said wryly.
Was I hearing things right? They were suspicious of him because he was the last of his clan who was… a normal vampire?
Before I was turned, Tavia had told me about Cyan getting injured while out on a patrol. She’d been very general without many details, but we’d heard stories about monstrous vampires since we were kids. Mindless, bloodthirsty creatures who were more likely to maul someone to death than simply drink blood.
Not unlike the vampires who had attacked our settlement and killed me.
“I’m sure you are, Cursed One.” Thorne stepped away, apparently finished with the patdown. “The only question that remains is what were you doing with our brusang?”
“I’m not yours, ” I snapped. “I’m not anyone’s.”
Thorne turned his menacing red eyes to me. If it weren’t for the fear that flashed through me, it would have been fascinating to note how dangerous his gaze seemed, despite being the same color as Novak’s.
“You’re considered the kin of Cyan’s blood mate,” the clan leader said. “That makes you ours. Our kin, our family.”
“I did nothing but provide her shelter from the sun, along with blood and a meal of meat for sustenance.” Novak answered Thorne’s question calmly. He never responded to the Cursed One moniker, which had to be deeply insulting. “Nothing inappropriate or untoward occurred.”
“She was with you all day?” Cyan went stiff, his eyes narrowed.
“ She is right here,” I interjected. “And yes, I stayed at Novak’s house. But nothing happened, just like he said.” I returned Cyan’s stare, daring him to insinuate anything else.
“You took blood from him?” Tavia asked.
My gaze snapped to hers, and she startled as if she didn’t expect my reflexes to be so fast. She looked worried, even a little betrayed. And I had to admit, deep down, I got a little thrill out of disappointing her. I felt like a teenager rebelling against an uptight mother.
“Yeah, so? That’s what I do now, don’t I?” I put on a wide, exaggerated smile so that she’d see my fangs. “Thanks to you.”
Tavia swallowed and lifted her chin. “You were just so uncomfortable at the blood bank. I didn’t think you’d take from a stranger.”
“Novak isn’t a stranger to me; he’s a friend.” I wasn’t entirely sure if he would agree with that, but it felt right to me. Plus, I couldn’t resist throwing another barb in Tavia’s face. “He helped me, actually helped me when I needed blood, rest, and to get out of the sun.”
“Amy, you don’t know him,” Cyan said. “You don’t know the history between our clans.”
For fuck’s sake. I was beyond done with hearing “clan history” as the excuse for mistreating people right now in the present moment.
“Whatever he did, which sounds like absolutely fucking nothing, it doesn’t warrant you treating him like a criminal just because he walked me here.” These vampires might have been the ruling clan, but that didn’t mean they weren’t assholes. I crossed my arms and lifted my chin to give Thorne my best glare. “Let him go. Right now.”
For all I knew, I was breaking thousands of vampire laws by making any kinds of demands for Novak, but I was past the point of caring. He hadn’t done anything wrong, and my blood boiled hotter every second they kept their hands on him.
“It’s all right, akra .” Novak rolled his head along the wall to look at me, that small smile showing a glint of fang. “I’m used to this from my Blood ‘til Dawn neighbors. Par for the course.”
I opened my mouth to argue, to tell him that didn’t make it okay to treat him like this. I certainly had no bias for this clan, not even with Tavi basically marrying into them. But Thorne stepped forward, his gravitas soaking up all the attention in the room.
“Here’s what’s going to happen, Novak of Rathka’s Order. We will let you go, undisturbed. But you will not take this brusang or anyone else of our clan into your home. You will not see her again, period. I think that would be best to keep the peace among our kind, don’t you agree?”
Fuck no, I do not agree.
But the question was not directed at me. I had no power here, as Thorne made abundantly clear. And anyway, the choice was entirely in Novak’s hands.
His expression hardened, gaze falling on me without saying anything. I couldn’t even begin to wonder what he was thinking, what kind of history or politics his mind ran through to decide his answer. From the moment he was dragged inside, it was obvious this wasn’t just about me staying at a stranger’s house. Something bigger was at play here, something more than him and me.
And yet my breath caught in my chest as I waited, hoping for a certain answer. Or even just a sign, the hint of a smile or some expression crossing his face that signaled he wanted to see me again.
When several seconds passed with him saying nothing, Thorne pressed once again.
“Might I remind you that Blood ‘til Dawn is the ruling clan of Sanguine. While your ancestors may be spinning in their graves at that fact, it is still a fact.”
“Are you saying this is an official clan decree?” Novak’s voice roughened slightly, the ease and humor gone.
“I’ll make it one if I have to,” Thorne said. “But if you’re such an honorable, noble male, we won’t have to resort to that, will we?”
Novak glanced at me one more time, and my heart sank at the cool mask across his expression. “No, we won’t.”
“So you agree to never set eyes on this brusang again?”
No.
“I do.”
Satisfied, Thorne gave a slight nod to the two vampires, who released Novak from his pinned position on the wall.
Novak straightened his waistcoat and adjusted his sleeves, truly looking like a prince compared to Blood ‘til Dawn with their scuffed boots, faded jeans, and leather jackets.
My instincts surged at the sight of him. I wanted to rush over and hug him, to feel the reassuring pulse of his jugular under my lips. I wanted to put my body between him and the others and bare my fangs, challenging them to come through me if they wanted him.
At the same time, I knew all those urges were wildly inappropriate for someone I just met. Maybe my vampire side wanted to protect the blood source I liked the most. That had to be it—some kind of animalistic survival thing.
I kept those instincts reined in as Novak gave a final smoothing of his waistcoat and a curt nod in my direction. “Take care, akra.”
That word. He’d said it twice. What did it mean?
With that, he strode out the side door into the street without so much as a glance to anyone else. I watched him go, wishing with all my heart that I could go after him. But I knew Blood ‘til Dawn would stop me, and I didn’t want to be pinned to the wall like he had been.
A sudden touch made me flinch, and my head jerked to see Tavia with her hand hovering over my shoulder.
“What?” I snapped.
She drew her hand away and moved closer to Cyan. “Just glad you’re back. Glad you’re okay.”
This passive side of Tavia was almost as infuriating as her overbearing side. If I snapped at my best friend, she snapped back. Fights weren’t common between us, but one of Tavia’s defining features was that she didn’t back down. Who was this person who acted afraid of me now that I had bigger teeth?
She cast her eyes aside, holding onto Cyan’s arm like a good, dutiful little wife. Not even a year ago, she gave a guy a black eye and cursed up a storm because he was trying to steal a batch of her wine.
Apparently I wasn’t the only one who had changed. But at least I hadn’t changed for a man.
I went robotically into the house with no destination in mind. My need to be away from Tavia and all of them carried me through the communal great room and down the stairs to the underground corridor where all the clan members had suites of rooms where they slept during the day.
Nothing’s changed, I realized when I entered Bea’s apartment and collapsed into the same sofa I’d rotted in for the past two weeks.
I felt exactly the same as when I was first turned into this… thing. Angry, resentful. Ugly. Wishing I could crawl into a hole and disappear.
A light clicked on and then a soft voice called out, “Hey, Amy?”
“Sorry, Bea. Now’s not a good time.” I rolled into the couch cushions, bringing my legs up to curl into a ball.
There was a sigh, and then I felt the weight of someone sitting next to my legs. “I’m sorry. I know you’ve had a rough couple of weeks, but I really need to talk to you.”
I turned slightly and looked up at her. Somehow, Bea’s looks and style fit the brusang features perfectly. She had a bit of a goth vibe with straight black hair, blunt bangs to her eyebrows, and she wore predominantly black clothes and silver-toned jewelry. Tonight, her lipstick was a darker shade of red. All that combined with her delicate bone structure and adorable button nose? The small fangs and black eyes were natural accessories to her overall look. She looked born to be an alluring, vampiric creature.
Jealousy flooded me, but I forced it down because Bea had always been polite and sweet. It wasn’t like she was preternaturally gorgeous to torment me.
“What did you want to talk about?”
She chewed her lip in a nervous response. “I understand things are tense with you and Tavia right now, and I don’t want to exacerbate that. But it has been a couple of weeks, and don’t get me wrong, I’ve been happy to help you. It’s just that my place isn’t set up to be shared by two people, and it’s starting to feel a little, um, cramped in here. I haven’t had any real privacy in a bit, so… ”
Bea trailed off, but I knew what she was saying. Her apartment in the Blood ‘til Dawn compound was a studio. Rather than an actual bedroom, her sleeping area was separated from the living area by a half wall. Aside from the small kitchenette and bathroom, there wasn’t much space.
And now she wanted me out.
I sat up, and her blue-green eyes went round with guilt. Shit, she felt really bad. Bea was just too nice. We were alike in that sense. Or at least we had been, until I’d become a ball of bitterness and depression.
“I’m really sorry, Amy. I just want to get the living room tidied up and?—”
“No, don’t be. I’m the one that should apologize. I’ve taken over your place, overstayed my welcome.” I rubbed my face, feeling bone-deep exhaustion settle into me. “It’s just… I don’t know where else to go.”
Bea hesitated before speaking. “Tavia and Cyan have an extra bedroom.”
I snorted. “Any chance I can get my own place? Maybe a little studio like this?”
“I believe there are some vacant suites, but you’d have to ask Thorne.”
Ask the asshole clan leader who forbade me from seeing Novak ever again? Yeah, right. It sounded like becoming roommates with Tavia and Cyan was my only option. Great.
I stood, hesitated, then gathered up the blankets and pillows that had been my bed and home for the past two weeks. “I’ll get this stuff washed and then return it. Sorry again, Bea. I should’ve realized.”
“Oh no, don’t worry about it. Put that stuff down, you’ve got enough on your plate.” She yanked the bedding from my arms and dumped it back onto the couch, then gave a sympathetic squeeze of my shoulders. “The beginning of being a brusang is hard. Really fucking hard. It’s so alienating feeling like you’re not human, but also not a true vampire. But it does get easier, I promise. And I am here if you need anything, seriously. Come back over and have some tea with me whenever you want.”
I looked at her face, her flawless skin and bright eyes set in black. The only imperfection I noted was the scar across the base of her neck, and it did nothing to detract from her beauty, or her sweet, cheery demeanor. She definitely wasn’t a woman who struggled to look at herself in the mirror.
“When?” I asked. “When does it get easier?”
The optimism in her expression faltered a little. “Well, everyone is different. And coming to terms with being a brusang is not a linear path. But for me, it was about five years before I really accepted who and what I was.”
Five years ? I didn’t know whether to hysterically laugh or cry.
If I was being deeply honest with myself, I wasn’t sure if I would last that long.