11. Amy
Chapter 11
Amy
T he night of Tavia and Cyan’s mating ceremony was a full moon, bathing all of Sanguine in silver light. Rather than the Blood ‘til Dawn compound, the ceremony was being held out in a public square.
The entire territory was invited to witness and celebrate, although the public was kept at a distance behind a roped-off perimeter guarded by Blood ‘til Dawn members. After checking in with guards, invited guests were allowed inside the perimeter where about a hundred chairs had been set out before a raised dais.
Blood ‘til Dawn seemed to be taking security extremely seriously, and shooed away many people who asked about having a seat closer to the couple. After most of the inner seats were being filled, the public began crowding around the perimeter, and I noticed some people climbing onto rooftops and balconies to watch.
My heart was fluttering with nerves as I took a seat in the farthest row from the dais, closest to the street where Novak said he’d be approaching from. For the first time, I started to have doubts that this would work. The Blood ‘til Dawn guards were turning people away with efficiency, informing onlookers that if they weren’t on the guest list, they weren’t permitted entry.
I didn’t know if Novak ever made it to the guest list. Tavia talked to Cyan, but that was all I knew. She’d gotten so busy in the last week getting fitted for her gown and preparing for the ceremony that we hadn’t had time to discuss it much. I assumed the plan was still in place because she never told me otherwise. She would find a way to tell me if it wouldn’t work, right?
In order to not alert suspicion, I opted to not visit Novak’s house in the week leading up to the ceremony. We texted every night though, and talked on the phone a couple of times. Finding new messages from him were my favorite moments of the week. Hearing my phone chirp or feeling a buzz in my pocket sent my chest fluttering.
But texts and calls were nothing compared to seeing him in person, and I found that I missed him. Least of all because it had been just over a week since I last took his blood, and the hunger had become a constant, gnawing ache.
I’d fantasized about his blood the last couple of days, which always turned into fantasies of him . I wondered what his body looked like under those fancy clothes, how well those strong forearms could hold me.
I was dying to see him, and yet incredibly nervous because of how much my crush on him had grown. I had to keep my attraction to him in check, had to keep reminding myself that my fantasies would stay purely in my head. Even if Novak did somehow return my feelings and desires, he was basically a vampire prince. Forget out of my league, he was out of my whole damn universe.
My phone buzzed with a message and I hurriedly checked the notification.
Coming down the street now. I’ll be there in five.
My already frazzled heartbeat kicked into overdrive as I typed out a reply.
Okay, I’m right next to the checkpoint.
An agonizing four minutes later, I heard the perimeter guard let out a gruff, “What the fuck are you doing here?”
Gathering all my courage, I stood and headed in his direction. With an inward groan, I realized it was Rhain posted to this spot. He was the massive vampire who had his arm against Novak’s throat.
“I was invited,” I heard Novak say.
“By who?” Rhain demanded.
“Me.”
Rhain whipped around, his expression confused as he stared into the air above my head.
“Down here.” I smiled as the huge vampire’s gaze slowly lowered to meet my eyes. Sure, I was shorter than most people on a good day, but compared to him, I was an absolute pipsqueak. “There you go.”
Rhain’s glare softened only a fraction, and he at least had the decency to back up so as to not loom over me. “I’m sorry, but he’s not permitted.”
“Yes, he is,” I chirped. “Tavia said I could invite him.”
“Tavia is not the head of this clan.”
“It’s her ceremony. She’s the one giving up her human life to spend centuries with one of your kind. Are you telling me she has no say over the guest list?”
Novak’s eyes bounced between us, his mouth tense like he was fighting a smile.
With a frustrated noise, Rhain pulled out his phone. “Give me a minute. Don’t fucking go anywhere.” He walked a few feet away, leaving Novak and me to stare at each other with matched wide-eyed expressions.
“Cyan, it’s Rhain.” The big vampire turned around, keeping us in his narrow-eyed sight as he muttered into the phone. “Got a small problem with your mate’s brusang friend… huh? Don’t tell me you’re… Are you fucking with me? Cy… ” Rhain’s glare hardened even more as he listened. “You’re sure about this? What if… fuck, fine. Okay.” He ended the call so abruptly, I wondered if he broke his screen. “Stay where we can see you,” he said to Novak. “And if you try anything, even breathe weird, you’re out of here, Rathka’s Bastard. Understand?”
“Completely.” Novak grinned as he entered the perimeter and paused to dip his head at Rhain once he was past the barrier. “Thank you for your hospitality. I’m sure it’ll be a beautiful ceremony.”
Rhain just snarled and turned his back, resuming his post.
“Oh shit, we did it!” Once we were out of earshot, I was practically squealing. “But Jesus, you didn’t have to antagonize him.”
“Ah, he makes it too easy. Couldn’t help myself.” Novak’s smile softened, his eyes darkening as he took me in from head to toe. “You look beautiful, akra.”
Heat rushed from my belly to my cheeks. I was borrowing one of Bea’s dresses, one that she had to hem thanks to my height, otherwise it would be dragging on the ground. But the top fit me nicely, giving me a bit of cleavage and accentuating my waist. The dress was a cornflower blue with sparkly black accents. Tavia blurted out that it matched my eyes when I tried it on, and while she meant it as a compliment, I wasn’t sure how to feel about that.
When I was human, I always thought my eyes were pretty, my best feature even. Now, I was just getting over the shock of seeing my blue irises surrounded by black. I was so self-conscious of them because they made it abundantly clear that I was neither human nor vampire.
But when Novak called me beautiful right then, all the insecurity melted away and I felt radiant. It was the first time a man had told me such a thing and meant it genuinely. I knew Novak wasn’t trying to flatter me, trying to manipulate me with the hopes of getting something later.
“Thank you.” I hoped those two words sounded humble and gracious and not like his compliment was the highlight of my whole week. “You look handsome, very dashing.”
He shoved his hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels to look down at himself. “I clean up well, sometimes.”
His charcoal waistcoat was embroidered with a subtle pattern, making him look elegant and refined. Even under his jacket, I could tell how well everything fit him, tailored to his form like a glove. Meanwhile, I was in a borrowed dress that reflected how strange my eyes were.
Suddenly I didn’t even feel deserving enough to be standing next to him, let alone being his date.
“Should we find a place to sit?” Novak offered me his arm, oblivious to the downward turn of my thoughts.
“Oh, sure.” I slid my hand around his bicep and let him lead.
The stares and chatter were in full swing as we found our way to a row of empty chairs. I could feel the eyes on us as we walked, hear the whispered conversations but not all of the words. Logically, I knew it had to do with the fact that he was here at all, a rival clan member in enemy territory, and whatever history that entailed.
But a small part of me was paranoid that they were whispering about me, wondering why a nobody brusang was on the arm of such a handsome vampire.
“Here should be good.” Novak allowed me to sit first before lowering next to me. “In plain sight of everyone who wants to murder me, but far enough away that nobody feels threatened.”
He spoke sarcastically, but I knew there was truth to his words.
“Is now a good time to tell me why Blood ‘til Dawn hates you so much?”
A long silence passed, and I thought he would ignore the question entirely. As he watched people fill the seats in front of the dais, he said, “My clan did awful things to Blood ‘til Dawn.” His gaze turned toward me. “That’s the objective truth, not one of those two-sides-to-every-story bullshit. A lot of people suffered. That’s why many vampires are glad Rathka’s Curse wiped out my bloodline.” He leaned in closer, his breath tickling my ear. “Some even think I wrought the Curse upon my kin. What do you think of that?”
“I don’t believe it for a second.” I laughed. “You couldn’t bear to see little ol’ me starve in your courtyard. There’s no way you could wipe out your entire family.”
Novak leaned back, chuckling. “It’s sweet that you have such faith in me.”
“Besides, that makes no sense,” I added. “If you cursed your family, why would you be hated if they were so awful? Wouldn’t you be a hero?”
He shook his head. “Anyone capable of wiping out a clan is capable of other terrible things. Plus, I came from them.” He shrugged. “Who’s to say I’m not just as terrible, or even worse than they were?”
“Me.” I leaned toward him to whisper conspiratorially. “I think you’re a softy under all the big bad rich guy stuff.”
Novak’s head fell back with laughter. His eyes were bright with mirth and his grin made my heart skip a beat. “You’re the only one in the world who thinks that, akra.”
“Doesn’t mean I’m wrong.”
“True enough.”
Our attention turned toward the dais as a hush fell over the crowd. Tavia and Cyan stood facing each other in front of a small altar. A third person with long, black hair covered in stripes of black and white paint stood on the far side of the altar, in the space between the couple.
“Who’s that?” I asked Novak in a whisper.
“Ruslan,” he answered. “His clan is Temkra’s Blood. They’re very religious, so they’re often tasked with doing ceremonies like these.”
After being prompted by Ruslan, Cyan removed his shirt and picked up a long dagger. His eyes never strayed from Tavia as he began cutting his own chest with the blade. I could see that he was carving characters, going over scars that were already on his skin.
I wanted to cover my eyes, it looked so painful. But he never flinched, not even as his skin reddened and swelled with each mark.
“Holy shit, what is he doing?”
“Tavia never told you about Blood ‘til Dawn and their vows?”
“She definitely never said anything about this.”
“Silver is the only material that can irreparably damage vampires and cause scars.” Novak angled his head toward me. “Blood ‘til Dawn scar themselves with silver blades when they make vows. Makes it a permanent reminder so that you’re more inclined to keep your vow. Probably doesn’t feel good to break your word and have a lie carved into your skin for the rest of your life.”
“Wow, I had no idea.” Reluctantly, my respect for Cyan increased a little. He was carving himself up for Tavia like his body was a ritual offering. “What did your clan think of this custom?” I asked Novak.
“Barbaric, naturally.” He snorted. “Real vampires break vows, double-cross, and lie all the time. Whatever it takes to come out on top, according to my father, at least.”
“But not you?”
Novak was quiet for a moment, intently watching the ceremony. “No. After seeing all the damage lies can do, I don’t want to subject other people to that.”
My chest warmed as I turned my attention back to the dais.
Cyan’s vow to Tavia was now running off of his chest, the markings heading toward his ribs. His lips moved, but his voice was too low to hear. The vow was meant only for her. Tavia’s gray eyes were wide, shining with tears of emotion. She worried at her lip, hands clenched in front of her as if fighting the urge to stop the man she loved from harming himself. But she must have known about this custom and that it would be part of the ceremony.
“He really loves her.”
I didn’t realize I had said that out loud until Novak replied with, “Seems that way.”
Once Cyan was finished, Ruslan turned to Tavia, holding out his hand as he said something. She placed the back of her arm in his palm and allowed him to draw another knife across her forearm, letting her blood spill into a wooden bowl on the altar. It reminded me of Novak cutting his arm to let me drink his blood.
The sacrifices we make for the ones we love.
Not that Novak loved me. No way, that was ridiculous. But he did at least like me enough to accommodate my weirdness about drinking blood directly from a vein.
Although the more I thought about it, the more curious I grew. I might like to try drinking from a wrist as long as it was his.
“This blood ritual has always fascinated me.” Novak’s gaze was riveted to the stage. “Their blood is mixed together in the bowl and some herbs are added, all while Ruslan says an incantation over it. Then she drinks it.” He narrated the actions as they happened. “And just like that, her lifespan is tied to his. She will live for centuries. And when they die, it’ll be together.”
“That’s actually really romantic.” I watched Tavia’s throat work as she tipped the bowl back, swallowing the contents.
“Maybe,” Novak mused. “But is it actually blood magic or based in science? Is there some kind of chemical reaction that happens, or is Ruslan truly channeling Temkra’s power?”
“Typical male response to romance.”
Novak chuckled, the sound dying away as Tavia finished drinking the concoction, the ritual complete. She and Cyan stared at each other for a beat before closing the small distance between them in a kiss that was equally fierce and tender. Cheers and applause erupted as those two became lost in the world of each other.
“They do seem well-matched.” Novak’s chair creaked as he shifted his weight. “Give them my well-wishes.”
“Yeah,” I said blankly.
I was oddly entranced while watching Tavia and Cyan. They held each other tightly and kissed, spoke some words, smiled, and kissed again. Cyan’s face was reverent, his forehead seared to hers. I was too far away to be sure, but there may have been tears in his eyes. He looked at Tavia like she was a goddess who walked the earth. Like he would devote every breath and beat of his heart to her happiness.
God, how did it feel to have someone look at you like that? To know beyond any doubt that someone loved you that much?
I was happy for Tavia. She had been my biggest defender as we grew up, literally. Bullies pushed me around because of my asthma and how small I was, and she pushed them right back because I was never strong enough to do it myself. She deserved more than anyone to have a partner who fought for her.
But where did that leave me? And would I ever find someone who felt that way about me? My happiness for her fit right alongside the hollow emptiness I felt for myself.
“Hey.” Novak nudged his knee against mine. “Want to get out of here?”
I wrenched my gaze away from the dais, turning to him. “Yes, please.”
He held out his elbow, prompting me to take his arm. “Let’s go.”
I hugged my arm around his bicep and together we walked out into the night.