Chapter 7
7
Jasper
“What are you doing here?” I twisted the lock on my bedroom door, locking us inside.
Malachi stood from where he had been sitting on the edge of my bed and stalked toward me. “Your window was unlocked, and I needed to see you one more time before I leave tomorrow.”
The weeks since the guys found out they were headed to LA had passed so fast, Malachi and I had hardly had a moment to ourselves. And when we had been together, we’d both avoided talking about what his leaving meant for us. Deep down, I knew we really had no future. Our lives were headed in different directions, but that didn’t mean my feelings for him hadn’t grown stronger over the last few months while we’d been sneaking around.
“You’re lucky Jesse isn’t here.”
“He told me he was going to the gym, so I knew it was safe.”
“I can’t believe this is the last time I’m going to see you for a while.” I cupped the back of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.
“I can’t believe it either,” he said against my lips. “I didn’t expect it to be so hard to say goodbye.”
Slowly, I walked us back toward my bed, and we tumbled onto the mattress when his knees hit the edge. Straddling his thighs, I reached for the button of his jeans. I wanted nothing more than to be with him one more time.
We were lying breathless on my bed when someone tried to open my door, but it wouldn’t budge since it was locked.
Jesse knocked. “Jasper, open up?”
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I grumbled, and then said louder, “What do you want?”
“Did you forget we were supposed to go get pizza tonight?”
Yeah, I had forgotten, even though I’d been excited a couple of days ago when we planned to spend a little brother time together before he left.
“I remembered,” I lied. “Just give me a sec.”
Malachi climbed out of bed and threw on his clothes.
“I wish you didn’t have to leave.” I sighed.
“Me too, but you should go have fun with Jesse,” he whispered and headed to the window.
Before he climbed out, I pressed my lips to his one final time. “Good luck in LA.”
I may have wanted more time with him, but maybe this was the perfect way to say goodbye. We had gotten some time together without another depressing conversation about this being the end for us. Our situation, whatever it was, had always been temporary and now it was over. But that didn’t mean my heart wasn’t breaking knowing we’d never share these moments again.
“Thanks.” He looked like he wanted to say more, but Jesse knocked again.
“Jasper, seriously, what are you doing?”
Once I was sure Malachi was gone, I opened the door. “Sorry. I’m ready now.”
“Why do you sound out of breath? Did I interrupt you jerking off or something?” He laughed.
“You’re ridiculous.” I tried to play it off as a joke, even though he wasn’t too far from the truth. “I’m definitely not going to miss your childish sense of humor while you’re gone.”
“Sure, you will. But don’t worry, little brother, I won’t forget about you when I’m a star.”
Maybe he wouldn’t, but I wasn’t so sure the same could be said about his best friend.
The next morning before school, my parents and I said our goodbyes to Jesse. Olivia was dropping him off at the airport where he was meeting up with the rest of Surrender to fly to LA.
“Gonna miss you, kid.” Jesse slapped my back playfully.
“Me too.”
He might have gotten on my nerves at times, especially when he thought he knew more than me or was overprotective, but the two of us were as close as brothers could be, and it was going to be strange not seeing him every day.
“You’ve got everything you need?” Mom asked for probably the hundredth time.
Jesse snorted. “Yeah, Mom. I even checked the tracking on the stuff I shipped ahead, and it should all be delivered tomorrow.”
“Okay, but let us know if you need anything else.” Tears shone in her eyes.
“I will.” He kissed her cheek.
“Good luck out there, Son. We’ll be rooting for you.” Dad pulled him in for a hug.
“Thanks,” he replied.
After our mom fussed over him a little more, he grabbed his two suitcases and guitar and followed Olivia to her car. My parents and I stood on the porch, and we watched as they drove off.
Once the car was out of sight, I walked inside, and headed toward my room to grab my phone.
Me: Have you left yet?
Malachi: Yeah. I can’t believe this is actually happening
I’ll be watching you on TV and then I’ll see you at the finale
Don’t jinx it ??
I could understand why he didn’t want to come across as overconfident about their chances of winning, but I’d watched other seasons of The Band Showdown and knew they were just as good, if not better, than previous winners.
Malachi: I’m really going to miss you
I’ll miss you too
I put my phone down and began getting ready for school. Hopefully, my classes and my friends would help keep my mind off of Malachi and how sad I was that we’d never really had a shot.
At the end of the day, I was still in a funk, so after finishing my homework, I started preparing dinner. I had just finished assembling a pan of enchiladas when my mom came home. She placed her bag on the chair at the island and hugged me.
“Hi, sweetie. How was school today?”
“It was fine,” I replied and moved to put the enchiladas in the oven.
“Your brother texted me a few minutes ago. They made it to LA.”
“Oh … That’s good.” It was probably silly of me to be disappointed that Mom told me instead of finding out from Malachi by a text.
She frowned. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“You just seem a bit down. I know not having Jesse around will be a big adjustment, but if they make it to the end, you’ll be so busy with all of your senior year stuff you’ll hardly notice he’s gone. Then June will be here before you know it, and we can see him again.”
I couldn’t tell her it wasn’t my brother who I was missing so much. Instead, I agreed with her. “I’m sure you’re right.”
While I started some rice, she walked to the fridge, grabbed a bottle of white wine, and poured herself a glass.
“Speaking of senior year, have you thought any more about what you want to do after graduation? I know you were looking at courses at Bunker Hill, and registration opens soon.”
My plan was to attend our local community college and then maybe transfer to Hawkins University after two years. However, with Jesse off chasing his dream, it made me realize I didn’t really have one of my own.
“A little bit, but I don’t know what I want to do yet.”
“Well, I happened to come across an ad for culinary school on social media today.”
I tilted my head. “How’d that show up on your timeline?”
She chuckled. “I’d told my boss about the incredible braised short ribs you made the other day. You know those apps are always listening.”
I nodded because my feeds were full of cooking videos and ads for bakeware. “It’s kind of creepy.”
“It is.” She took a sip of wine. “But the program has a lot to offer. The school offers cuisine and pastry courses, and you’d get to live in Paris while doing something you love. I know you said you wanted to go to Europe one day.”
Paris would be exciting, and making a career out of something I was passionate about would be awesome. “That actually sounds really cool. Can you send me the info?”
She smiled. “Absolutely.”
I sat in the living room and worked on some homework while waiting for The Band Showdown to start. It had been three months since the guys had left for LA, and I still missed Malachi like crazy.
At first, he and I texted several times a week, but once they started filming the live shows a few weeks ago, more time seemed to pass between messages. My head and heart were in a constant battle. Not having him around all the time and sharing secret moments hurt even more than I expected. But I tried to remember how the competition was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for him and my brother, and was where his focus needed to be.
I was barely paying attention to the TV until the host, Kirk Benson, announced it was time for Surrender to perform. The second Malachi started singing “Natural” by Imagine Dragons, the audience went wild. He moved around the stage effortlessly while giving the impression he was singing directly to those in the crowd, proving he was born to be a star.
“I don’t know how it’s possible, but they sound better and better every week.” Mom beamed.
“There’s no way they aren’t making it to the finale,” Dad said.
“None of the other bands even come close to how good they are,” I added.
As they finished their performance, I felt the familiar ache in my chest that came with the reminder that it would be another week before I could watch him again. And I often wondered if I would ever get over the sadness of losing him.
While the show went to commercial, I decided to check my email. In my inbox was an email I’d been waiting on for a couple of weeks. Clicking to open it, I read the first line.
“Holy crap,” I breathed.
“Everything okay?” my mom asked.
“Uh … yeah. Everything’s fine.”
Dad lifted an eyebrow. “Then what’s going on?”
“I got into the Paris culinary school.”
Two months later, I sat with my parents in the audience of The Band Showdown . Surrender had made it to the finale with two other groups, and we would soon find out if they won.
From the moment the cameras started rolling, everything moved quickly. When it was time for Surrender to perform for the last time on the show, we, along with the other guys’ families and Olivia, were directed to sit in the front row. It had been the same when the other bands were on stage. It allowed the production crew to get clear shots of us cheering for our loved ones.
Kirk Benson stood center stage and introduced the guys. “And now for the night’s final performance, welcome back to the stage, Surrender.”
The entire studio erupted in applause as the lights went down. A second later, the sound of Jesse’s guitar filled the venue. As the intro faded out, a spotlight illuminated Malachi standing in the center of the stage, one hand wrapped around the mic stand and the other pushing his dark brown hair off his gorgeous face.
He looked out at the crowd and began singing as Elliott and Silas joined in with Jesse. On the surface, Malachi looked like the same guy who had left months ago, but he seemed to have gained even more confidence since he’d been on the show. He was made for the stage.
I continued to watch as he poured every possible emotion into his lyrics. If I’d been a better brother, I would have spent an equal amount of time paying attention to Jesse, but I couldn’t tear my gaze away from Malachi. His voice was deep and smooth and hearing it again in person caused goosebumps to form along my skin. All of those feelings I had tried to bury over the past few months rose to the surface again, and it hurt to know our lives were going in different directions.
Their song came to an end far too quickly. When it was time for the winner to be announced, the anticipation was killing me. I couldn’t imagine how it was for the guys.
Kirk Benson returned to the stage with an envelope in his hand. “It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for. These final three bands have endured countless hours of practice and performances, all in the hope of being named the next winner of The Band Showdown . After tallying the votes, we’re ready to announce the band whose dreams are about to come true.”
The lights dimmed once again, and the house band started a drum roll.
“The winner of this year’s The Band Showdown is …”
My heart felt as though it had stopped in my chest as we all stared at the stage. I was nervous for my brother and Malachi as we waited the seconds that felt like an eternity for Kirk to utter the words we wanted to hear.
“Surrender!”
I jumped to my feet along with my parents, Olivia, the Danvers, and Silas’s and Elliott’s families as we shouted and clapped.
They had done it.
Once the cameras stopped rolling, we were ushered backstage. Dozens of people surrounded the band, but the minute the guys saw all of us, they came rushing over.
“Holy shit! Can you believe it?” Jesse wrapped his arms around all of us.
“We’re so proud of you,” Mom gushed.
“You were incredible,” Dad added.
I smiled. “I knew from the beginning you were going to win.”
We continued to celebrate, and eventually, Malachi made his way to me.
“Congratulations.” I gave him a hug. “You looked amazing out there.”
“Thank you. It’s been a wild ride,” he replied.
“Yeah, Jesse’s been sending me pics. Looks like you guys have been living your best life.”
He frowned slightly and lowered his voice. “About that. I’m sorry I haven’t texted much.”
I shook my head. “You don’t have to explain. We both knew things would change once you were out here.”
Even though I’d had a difficult time dealing with his absence, I didn’t want him to feel bad.
“I’d really like to talk?—”
“Surrender, we need you all over here for some pictures,” an assistant called out.
“Later, okay?”
I nodded and watched Malachi walk away once again. Before we’d arrived, we had been told that if they won, they were obligated to do photoshoots and interviews immediately following the show, so even though I agreed we could catch up later, I knew we wouldn’t have any time alone because I was leaving the next day for Paris.