CHAPTER 9
ROMAN
We leave through the back door without saying goodbye to anybody. I’m too rattled to paste on a fake smile and I have a feeling Ryan would see right through it anyway. The last thing I want to give Ryan is a reminder that everybody in this town sees me as a convict. Not to mention it would ruin Nyx’s night. It was easier to just take Carter's hand and let him lead me through the emergency door and straight to the sidewalk to catch an Uber. I can text Ryan later and apologize. I just hope I haven’t fucked up the progress we’ve made.
I don’t even realize I'm shaking until Carter pulls my body tight against his chest and rubs his hands up and down my sides like he's soothing a toddler after a fall. I’m not mad about it. I’ve been starved for touch for many years so every caress he offers me right now, I’m going to lap it up. I drop my forehead to his shoulder and let him hold me.
I was dreading that moment and knew it would happen sooner or later. I’m just surprised it hasn’t happened before now. This town’s not big enough and clearly it never forgets. I let my guard down tonight. I was having so much fun and I let myself believe for just a night that I was a normal guy, at a friend's birthday, dancing with a guy I like. So when it happened, I froze. I barely recognized those guys but apparently they went to high school with me. They were in my math class that Terry taught. The mention of that time just made my brain shut down. Flashing images of Terry covered in blood laying on his bed. Begging the police to help him while they held my arms behind my back.
My back hit the wall as I tried to shake off the memories, but their hateful words kept me in that spiral. They called me a monster. A stalker who almost killed a guy because he wouldn’t fuck me. Each word felt like a knife slashing at my skin, wanting me to bleed for a sin I never committed. Then I heard him. Carter appeared out of nowhere and faced three angry guys, ready to throw down to protect me. I’m a big guy and this wasn’t the first time I’ve been cornered by several guys. Nobody survives a prison sentence without some scars, and not all scars can be seen. In that moment, it didn't matter how many fights I’d had before or how many times I had to prove I wasn’t one to fuck with. Being faced with my past peers and their razor-sharp words turned me into a shell. Like I was having some kind of out-of-body experience. All I could do was close my eyes and wait for it to be over. Then Carter was there like some kind of pit bull, baring his teeth and protecting me. I never realized he had this side to him, he's always so jovial and kind, more like a golden retriever but there he was all bark with the promise to bite. Nobody has ever protected me like that. I know he jokes about us being soulmates and he's up-front about wanting to hook up with me but this right here is deeper. He’s not only willing, but eager to fight. For me.
I’m lost in thought the whole way home. Carter thankfully gives me time to process what happened, just sitting by my side with my hand in his, squeezing every so often to remind me not to get lost in my head. I doubt that Carter would ever pressure me to tell him what’s going on in my mind. It’s not his style and he’s proving that right now by not asking me question after question. I want to explain what happened tonight and fifteen years ago. I want him to know the real story before he gets any more invested. I just don't want to tell him right now. Tonight I just want to get out of my head, I want to forget, I want him to make me forget and just let me feel wanted.
I don’t even realize we’re home until Carter nudges me out of the car with a soft reassuring smile. Like he wants me to know I'm safe. He doesn’t need to do that, I know I'm safe with him. He proved that tonight. I follow behind him, still shook by what happened. As we step inside my body tenses. I still haven’t spoken and I know I need to give him something. He just jumped to my defense and I haven’t explained anything yet. That just shows his character. I have no doubt he would have done the same thing for any of the guys but the fact he did that for me, means more than he will ever know.
“What do you need?” he asks in a whisper as he turns to face me, lightly placing his hands on my shoulders almost like he wants to both give me space and keep me close at the same time. This is the point most people would start the third degree, but not Carter. I don’t think I could have dulled the smile on my face if I’d tried. It may be small but the fact I’m smiling at all is a testament to the wonder that is Carter Banks.
“You. Just you, Tatts.” My voice still sounds so raw and I’m sure my vulnerability is showing through my smile, but I’m okay with that. I’m okay with being vulnerable around him. I lift my eyes to meet his and I don’t see pity in them. No. I see nothing but desire and understanding. He gets it. He gets that I need an escape right now. I need him to make me forget the shit show that is my life for just a few hours.
CARTER
“You. Just you, Tatts.” The slight tremor in his voice makes me pause for a second, but his eyes plead for me to take his mind off of that moment. Stepping closer, I slide my hands up from his shoulders to cup the sides of his face. Leaning in, I press my lips to his. A soft peck before moving to kiss each cheek, the very tip of his nose. Brushing my thumbs lightly over his eyelids to close them, I put light kisses there too.
I'm sure he expected me to rush things, to rip off his clothes and straddle him like I did that first time we kissed. Right now is not the time for that. This is the time for sweet caresses. For me to take him out of his mind and give him the touch and the attention he craves. There isn’t an inch of this man's body that I’m not going to kiss tonight. Letting my hands drop off his face I press our chests together and link our fingers at our sides.
“Come on, Muscles. Let me help you relax.” I take another small taste of his lips as he exhales a breath which I don't think he even realized he was holding. Stepping back I wait for his eyes to meet mine and for him to nod his agreement before leading him upstairs to my bedroom. I can tell that he's shrunk into himself, the confidence from the dance floor gone. When his shirt hits the floor in the hallway, that is all I need to know that he is with me in this moment.
Our lips meet again, firmer this time and when my hands move to his body, his bare skin is cool against my palm and the valleys and hills of his muscles make me groan against his mouth. The sounds he's making are music to my ears, or my dick, which starts to act like a snake while its charmer coaxes it out of the basket. I vow to myself that I will do everything in my power to hear those sounds every day from now on.
Turning our bodies I start to walk him further into the room, until the back of his legs hit the bed and he falls to the mattress. He looks up at me with kiss-swollen lips and his hair sticking up where I must have run my hands through it. I don’t even remember doing it, but the image he is making right now has me tearing off my shirt, sending buttons flying all over the place.
“I’ve always wanted to do that,” I explain, then catching his eyes I roll my hips, spinning on the spot. “Magic Mike ain’t got shit on me.” I wink and watch Roman burst into full belly laughs. “God, you are so beautiful,” I whisper as I unzip my jeans and shuck them off before crawling onto his lap, taking his face in my hands again. “You should always be laughing,” I whisper against his lips and slide my hands into his already messy hair.
“Something tells me with you around that won’t be a problem,” Roman mutters before attacking my mouth like he wants to make sure he gets a taste of every corner. Our hands seem to be in sync as we both start to push at his jeans. As good as it feels to grind against his crotch, I need skin on skin, some dick-on-dick action. The moment we shed the last of our clothes we are back on each other. With no more barriers between us I take my chance to do what I've wanted to do since I first laid eyes on Roman.
Tearing my mouth from his I smirk at his little whimper of protest which quickly turns to a groan as I start to kiss and lick my way along his jaw and down his neck. Biting and nibbling at his skin I have to fight the urge to suck my name in love bites on his neck. Moving down his body I trace his ink with my tongue, my hands caressing his sides, urging him to spread his legs, allowing me to move between them and press my throbbing cock against the mattress. I feel like I'm two seconds from coming with this attack on my senses. His unique scent and the taste of his skin is driving me crazy. Watching his face contort in pleasure, his skin beneath my fingers, his taste on my tongue and those fucking sounds, my God. Taking Roman’s nipple into my mouth I playfully bite on it and watch as he arches his back.
“Fuck, Carter,” he growls and it makes my balls draw up.
“Relax, Tatts, I got you.” Slipping further down the mattress I embrace his cock with my fingers, admiring his girth and length and the velvet feel of his skin. Perfection. I don’t waste any more time and take him between my lips. The taste of his precum explodes on my tongue and now I'm the one groaning. I lap at his slit, needing more. I want him to let go, to take out all of his frustrations on me. Looking straight into his eyes I spit on his cock and use my tongue to spread it down the underside of his shaft. The weight of it on my tongue is making me feral. I take him all the way to the back of my throat and swallow his tip. My eyes start to water, but I still want more. Roman is watching me with his jaw clenched tight like he's holding back.
“Use my mouth,” I tell him.
“W-What?” The uncertainty in his voice makes me chuckle. Is he kidding me? Without hesitation I slip my hands under his hips and force them up, making his cock hit the back of my throat again. “Oh fuck.” Now he's getting it.
Placing his hand on the back of my head he thrusts up experimentally, like he's testing the waters. Fuck that. I press down on his hand, sliding his fingers into my hair, urging him without words to just take what he needs. He thrusts again, deeper this time and a guttural groan rips from his throat as the tethers holding him back snap and he starts pumping faster and deeper into my mouth. Now we’re talking. I moan around him and drag my nails down his trembling thighs. “Fuck, I’m not going to last.” His voice is like gravel now as he grabs my shoulders and pulls me up so our faces align. “I really wanna fuck you, Carter, will you let me?” he asks, a little of that uncertainty bleeding into his tone. I wonder for a moment how long it has really been for him since he was intimate with anybody. Not that it matters because I might not have been his first but I will sure as fuck be his only from now on.
“Fuck, Muscles.” My voice is hoarse with arousal and how hard he just fucked my throat. “Yes. That. You need to do that.” I reach into my nightstand for supplies. “Do you want to prep me, big guy, or do you like to watch?” I’m down for either but knowing he's watching me as I stretch my hole for him has my dick drooling all over his defined abs.
“Show me how you like it, Tatts.” I chuckle at his words and turn to straddle him reverse-cowboy style, making sure he has a front row seat to this masterclass in bottom prep.
“You better pay close attention then, Muscles.” I throw a wink over my shoulder and watch as his playful smirk turns to a look of pure starvation as he sees me dripping lube on my fingers and teasing my hole before pressing in. One finger disappearing into my hole, quickly followed by another. His big hands palm my ass, spreading me for a better view. Dropping my shoulders to the mattress between his legs I moan. The stretch always feels so good but my ass needs more. I want to feel his thick cock, soon to be tattooed with my name, stretching me. I crave that burn. “I can’t wait for you to fill me up, big guy, you’re going to fit so perfectly, my ass was fucking made for you.” I’m starting to ramble but with every swipe of my fingers against my prostate the anticipation of being filled so completely is taking over. “I’m going to fucking ruin you, Roman. Nobody will ever fuck you like I can.”
“Fucking hell, are you trying to make me come?” He pants, slapping both my cheeks and pressing a finger inside to join my own. A loud curse leaves my mouth before my body jolts as he suddenly sits up and pulls me back to rest against his chest. Pressing his face into the crook of my neck I feel his teeth grazing my skin. Holy sweet baby Jesus, he's making all my shifter romance dreams come true.
“Yesss, Alpha, mark me,” I groan and reach back to hold his head against my skin. I can feel the tug of his lips as he fights back a smile.
“Alpha, huh?” Amusement laces his tone. I love that he embraces my weirdness and just rolls with it.
“Uh huh. I’m just a little Omega begging for his Alpha's cock. You gonna fill me up, Alpha? Breed my needy hole?” My own cock jerks and drips even more precum. I’m living the fucking dream right now with the way Roman’s cock is twitching under my ass as his teeth sink into my skin. Not hard enough to draw blood but enough to leave a mark. This may not be a shifter romance book and an author certainly isn’t narrating my life, but he gives in to my whimsical notions, marking me as his, while we work together to slick up my hole. I shudder at the intensity of my own feelings. Karma and fate have blessed me with my perfect Alpha.