Chapter 45
Elias leaned against my shoulder, half staggering. He swiped the back of his hand across his mouth as I guided him to his room.
Sinclair fought dirty, and he didn’t care about anything when he was angry. Elias faced his full wrath. If I hadn’t stopped them, they would have ended up killing each other.
Another gust of agony burst from Elias’ mouth. I’d never seen him this way. So fragile. He always kept it together, no matter what. To the point that I never thought anything could touch him. He stumbled into the wall beside the door, and slid to the floor with a hard thud.
“All of this could have been avoided if I’d been a normal fucking Alpha and scooped up our Scent Match as soon as I’d found her,” he gasped, clawing at his chest.
I crouched and searched for the right words to comfort him, but I couldn’t rip them free. I continued to grapple with my emotions. They simmered on the back burner.
A dry sob burst from his throat explosively.
“Nothing has ever brought me to this point.” He raised his red, damp gaze to mine. “Not the abuse at Forest Peak, or the one at Jennifer’s—”
He choked off, and my blood ran cold. He never mentioned Jennifer . . . that woman who’d birthed me. Sinclair showed up as a preteen to live with us, a few years later, she adopted Elias.
It was as if Briar had battered a barrier down and freed every inch of his emotions that had accumulated over years.
“Everything she suffered . . .” Elias moaned.
I couldn’t disagree. “I can’t fucking stop crying,” he spat, disgust filling his tone.
She’d rammed into our lives, cracked our chests open and forced us to feel. She’d truly had nothing to her name. No one and nothing to fall back on. Then she’d come to us for help.
We’d belittled her. Used her.
Meanwhile she’d kept our pictures.
“Fuck.” Elias rubbed his face and sucked in a hard breath, shaking his head. “I don’t deserve her . . .”
“We don’t deserve her,” I snapped and struggled to swallow.
All of us knew that.
Another wave of agony came through our Pack bond.
“Block, man,” I whispered. “Mine is enough.” I rubbed my sternum like I could soothe the billowing sensation of sadness.
“Do you want me to get Briar in here?” She would be the only one who could get through to him and calm him down.
“No,” he snarled. “Don’t bring her in here. I won’t put this on her.” He scrubbed his face again. “Go. I need some time alone.”
I sighed, nodding. “Make sure to clean up those cuts.” The one across his eyebrow was especially deep.
I left him to his pain, shutting the door behind me quietly.
Hesitating near the exit, I debated the merit of going to check on her.
But it wasn’t a question; even if I couldn’t touch her, I craved her proximity, just for a second. I walked past Sinclair’s bedroom, and his poster littered the floor in pieces. A piece of a shredded woman caught my eye.
I raked my fingers through my hair. Briar was fucking all our minds up.
It took me seconds to reach her room. I slowly cracked her door open.
She stared at the boxed new computer on the bed, a glazed look on her face. My muscles relaxed, and a swell of love rushed forward.
Funny, I never thought I’d be able to love anyone other than my Pack brothers, much less a woman.
Yet, here I was, shuffling in front of her door, anxiety eating at me.
“Are you going to come in or what?” She still hadn’t lifted her gaze.
I sheepishly entered and sat on the edge of her bed.
“Are they okay?” she asked, only now raising her gaze. Worry and frustration were clear in her expression. Her lips puckered.
“You hate yourself for worrying about them, don’t you?” I guessed.
She grunted.
“They’re fine.”
At my response, she visibly relaxed, her shoulders dropping, and her lips parting with an exhale.
As much as she tried to fight it, she wanted us.
That was all we could hold on to as her Alphas.
Being Scent Matches didn’t make us a sure thing.
Nor did it make her fall in love with us; no, all the scent told us was we were a match, that we could complete each other.
It was a biological and emotional match; we were meant for one another, but that didn’t force love.
And right now, I was wishing it did.
It would make everything so much simpler.
Perhaps we wouldn’t have ended up in this situation.
“Are you getting back to writing?” I tapped the top of the computer box.
“I was trying to,” she grunted and shrugged and gripped the edge to place it on her nightstand. “I feel weirdly nervous about getting back into it.”
She offered me a peek inside her insecurities. I tried not to show her how pumped that made me.
“Considering an article about everything. It makes sense.”
“Yeah,” she mumbled, squeezing the blanket higher, her shoulders curving forward, and she shivered exaggeratedly. “I’m going to settle in for bed.”
“This early?” I raised an eyebrow. I didn’t want to leave her.
“Yup,” she chirped, raising an eyebrow.
I sighed and stood, stretching my arms. Her focus snagged on my exposed stomach, but I kept my anticipation under wraps.
“Goodnight, Briar,” I murmured.
“Night,” she mumbled.
I left her, my heart aching with each step.