Chapter Seven
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THE AIR IN THE BEDROOM felt heavier than usual in a way Taylor couldn’t name.
Ben’s presence had become familiar and comforting, but it felt different than usual.
They’d shared this bedroom for a while now, but now, the space between them felt different, and Taylor’s stomach twisted in a way that was weird but not unpleasant.
Ben leaned back on their bed as he watched the ridiculous TV show he loved so much. His skin was pale, and it looked like it glowed in the dim light of the screen. He was fully focused on the on-screen drama, which gave Taylor the opportunity to watch him.
“You’ve been quiet tonight,” Ben suddenly said, his voice low and soft. He was always soft-spoken, and Taylor liked that. After the chaos of his days, he enjoyed coming home to Ben’s quiet presence.
Taylor cleared his throat. “Just tired, I guess,” he lied, though his heart was pounding. He was tired, but that wasn’t what was keeping him quiet.
Ben watched Taylor for a moment before smiling.
He shifted slightly on the bed, his gaze lingering on Taylor in a way that made Taylor’s skin prickle.
He couldn’t remember ever feeling like this, but then, he’d never been with his mate.
That was what made Ben special—not that he was a man but that he was Taylor’s mate.
“Bullshit,” Ben said lightly. “You’re thinking too hard. I can see it in your face.”
Taylor laughed. “Am I that obvious?”
“Kind of.” Ben sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed, and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. His gaze locked with Taylor’s. “What’s on your mind?”
Taylor’s cheeks flushed, and he glanced away. It’s stupid, he thought. Ben's my mate. I shouldn’t feel awkward talking about this with him.
But he did, and he wasn’t sure how to bring it up. “Do you ever think about trying things? New things, I mean.”
Ben tilted his head. “Like what?”
Taylor’s pulse quickened, and he swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly dry. He wasn’t sure how to put what he was feeling into words, even though he’d been thinking about it for a while now.
Ben’s grin softened, and he stood, crossing the short distance between them. “Taylor,” he said quietly. “If there’s something you want, just say it.”
Taylor’s breath caught as Ben stepped closer. He could smell the faint scent of Ben’s sweat, something warm and musky that made his head swim. His heart thudded in his chest, and he felt like he might spontaneously combust before he even got to the point.
“I don’t know,” Taylor whispered. “I don’t know what I want.”
Ben reached up to brush a strand of hair from Taylor’s forehead. The touch was so gentle that Taylor felt his knees weaken. Only Ben could have this effect on him.
“Yes, you do,” Ben murmured, his lips curving into a smile. “You just don’t know how to ask for it.”
Before Taylor could process what was happening, Ben leaned in, his lips brushing against his in a kiss that was tentative and questioning. Taylor froze, but then Ben’s hand cupped his cheek, and the kiss deepened, hot and demanding.
It was unlike anything Taylor had ever experienced in his previous relationships.
Ben’s lips were soft but insistent, his tongue teasing the seam of Taylor’s mouth until he opened for him, letting out a low moan that seemed to surprise both of them.
Ben’s other hand slid around Taylor’s waist, pulling him closer until their bodies were flush, and Taylor could feel every line of Ben’s chest against his own.
He wasn’t soft like the women Taylor used to date. He didn’t have breasts or long, soft hair. He didn’t smell like flowers or candy.
He didn’t need all of those things. He was Taylor’s mate, and that was enough.
Ben broke the kiss, his breathing ragged as he pressed his forehead against Taylor’s. “Was that okay?” he asked. “Was it what you wanted?”
Taylor nodded. “Yeah,” he breathed out. “More than okay.” Even when he hadn’t been able to find the words, Ben had known what was on his mind. It was hard to believe, but Taylor knew it had to do with their bond. Even though they weren’t mated yet, Ben knew him.
Ben’s smile was slow, and he pressed another kiss to Taylor’s lips, this one hungrier. His hands slid down Taylor’s sides, fingers trembling slightly as they tugged at the hem of Taylor’s shirt. “Can I?” he asked, his lips moving against Taylor’s.
Taylor didn’t trust himself to speak, so he nodded again.
His hands fumbled when he tried to help Ben pull the shirt over his head.
The cool air hit his skin, and he shivered, but Ben’s hands were already there, warm and sure as he smoothed them over Taylor’s chest. His touch sent sparks racing through Taylor’s veins, and he let out a gasp when Ben’s fingers brushed over a sensitive spot just below his ribs.
“We’ll take it slow,” Ben murmured.
Slow wasn’t what Taylor wanted, though. They’d done slow already. It had given him the time to wrap his mind around his mate being a man and decide what he wanted. He might be hesitant, but that was because he wanted to make things good for Ben, not because he wasn’t sure of what he wanted.
His body felt like it was on fire. He reached for Ben’s shirt, fumbling with it until he could get it off his body.
Ben chuckled before kissing Taylor again, deeper this time, his hands once again roaming over Taylor’s bare skin.
He was a long way from the timid man he’d been when they’d first met, and Taylor loved that.
Ben trusted him enough to be himself with him, and Taylor was proud of that.
Ben’s fingers trailed lower, brushing the waistband of Taylor’s jeans, and Taylor’s breath hitched. “Ben,” he whispered, his voice trembling. “I’ve never done this with a man.”
“I know,” Ben said gently, pressing a kiss to the corner of Taylor’s mouth. “It’s really not that different. Just do what feels good.”
Ben’s hands were on Taylor’s belt now, undoing it with ease.
His jeans pooled at his feet, and Taylor felt a rush of vulnerability, standing there in nothing but his boxers, which wasn’t like him, but he was doing this with his mate.
Ben’s gaze was soft, though, and he pulled Taylor into another kiss.
“You’re beautiful,” Ben murmured against Taylor’s lips.
Taylor’s heart swelled, and he reached for Ben’s belt, his hands shaking slightly as he undid it. Ben’s breath hitched, but he didn’t stop Taylor. Instead, he guided his hands when he hesitated. Taylor’s breath caught at the sight of Ben’s body, slim and pale, and for Taylor to love.
Ben’s hands were everywhere, skimming over Taylor’s hips, his thighs, his chest, until Taylor was trembling with the need for more.
Ben pulled Taylor down onto the bed, their legs tangled together, and Taylor gasped as Ben’s lips brushed over his neck, trailing down to his collarbone.
Ben’s hands moved lower, cupping Taylor through his boxers, and Taylor arched into the touch.
“Tell me what you want,” Ben whispered.
“You,” Taylor said. “Just you.” For the rest of their lives, if he could make that happen. “I want us to bond.”
Ben’s smile was soft, almost tender, when he kissed Taylor again, his hands slipping beneath the waistband of his boxers.
The first touch of Ben’s hand on his bare skin made Taylor’s head spin, and his body arched off the bed.
Ben’s fingers explored him with a gentleness that made Taylor’s chest ache, and when Ben’s hand wrapped around him, Taylor thought he might combust.
“Oh god,” Taylor gasped, his hands clutching at Ben’s shoulders. “I don’t—I don’t know how—”
“Shh,” Ben murmured, pressing a kiss to Taylor’s lips. “Just feel, Taylor.”
Taylor did—not that he had a choice. Every stroke of Ben’s hand sent waves of pleasure coursing through him, building higher and higher until he was trembling and on the edge.
He could feel Ben’s hard cock pressed against his thigh, and the thought of it and of what they were about to do sent a thrill through him.
“Ben,” Taylor whispered. “I’m—”
“I’ve got you,” Ben said soothingly. “Let go.”
Taylor did. Pleasure crashed over him, hot and intense. Ben’s name escaped his lips in a strangled cry, and Ben held him through it, murmuring soft words of affection until Taylor was spent and slumped in his arms.
For a moment, they just lay there, their breath mingling, their bodies pressed together. Then, slowly, Ben leaned in, pressing a kiss to Taylor’s lips.
“You okay?” he asked softly.
Taylor nodded, his heart still racing. “Yeah,” he whispered. “More than okay.”
Ben smiled, his hand brushing over Taylor’s cheek. “Good,” he said. “Because we’re just getting started.”
Taylor’s heart pounded in his chest as he stared at Ben. His fingers trembled slightly as he reached out, hovering over Ben’s stomach. The warmth radiating from Ben’s skin was intoxicating, but Taylor hesitated, unsure of how to proceed. Could it really be as easy as doing what felt good?
Ben’s gaze softened, his dark eyes meeting Taylor’s. “It’s okay,” Ben murmured. “You can touch me.”
Taylor swallowed hard and slowly let his fingertips graze Ben’s skin.
He inhaled sharply, his fingers tracing the lines of Ben’s soft stomach.
Taylor’s confidence grew with every inch he explored because it really wasn’t that different than doing this with a woman.
Well, it was different because Ben was his mate, but physically, it was similar to any first time with a lady.
Taylor didn’t know Ben’s body yet, but he’d learn it.
His fingers dipped lower, brushing against the waistband of Ben’s boxers. Beneath the fabric, he could feel the heat of Ben’s arousal, and his stomach tightened with a mix of anticipation and nerves. He glanced up, meeting Ben’s gaze again, and saw the hunger there.
“I want to touch you,” Taylor whispered. “I want to feel you in my hand.”
Ben’s breath hitched, and he nodded. “Do it,” he urged.