Chapter 10
TATE
I woke up on Friday morning more eager to see Blair than ever. And not just because last night had been freaking amazing. I would’ve been this excited to see her even if she hadn’t been responsible for the most mind-blowing orgasm I’d had in ages.
This was our last day together. The clock was ticking, and I had no time to waste.
As I hopped out of bed, I decided to go down to Blair’s room to see what she wanted to do for breakfast. I got myself dressed and opened the door to my hotel room, only to find a piece of paper at my feet.
At first, I assumed it was one of those Do Not Disturb signs that you hang on your door, but upon further inspection, I realized it was an envelope.
I picked it up and opened it.
My heart sank as I discovered a letter from Blair.
Tate,
Don’t hate me for doing this. But when I woke up this morning, I realized just how much I’m dreading leaving you. Our intimate moment over the phone last night only made it worse.
So, I checked out early this morning.
I want you to know that this time with you has changed me for the better.
I’ll always wish you’d taken a risk, so we could’ve experienced being together at least once.
But I understand your hesitancy, and it’s not fair for me to continue to tempt you into something your conscience has been fighting so hard.
I will always think of you when I look up at the moon—just like we did together last night on the beach.
And please don’t blame yourself for not doing everything perfectly in the past. Today and every day is a new day.
Love,
Blair
The paper shook in my hand.
What the fuck?
She’s gone?
I read the letter at least two more times, my hand trembling.
This couldn’t be true. I’ll never see her again? I’d planned to give her my number before she left, in case she ever needed me. Maybe I’d have gotten her last name, though she would’ve had to trust that I wouldn’t spend the rest of my life stalking her.
Sadness consumed me. I couldn’t believe she thought leaving without a proper goodbye was the answer.
Should I race to the airport?
My heart pounded.
Think.
Think.
This wasn’t a decision she’d made lightly.
I had to respect her wishes, as painful as that was.
Still, I stormed down the hall to the elevator and went to her room—just in case. Perhaps there was a tiny chance she hadn’t left yet.
I knocked.
There was no answer.
My stomach knotted. But I still hadn’t accepted it yet.
I raced down to the lobby and looked around. No sign of her. I also checked the two restaurants. No Blair.
I asked the front desk if someone named Blair had checked out, and while they said no, it wasn’t a requirement to stop by the desk when you were leaving, so that wasn’t necessarily encouraging.
After searching the resort inside and out, I had no choice but to try to accept that Blair had left.
She’s gone.
My profound sadness was much worse than I’d anticipated feeling when we parted ways. This felt more like having my heart ripped out. It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced.
I returned to my room and lay back on my bed to read her letter a couple more times, then I closed my eyes as I drowned in regret.
I felt completely helpless, with no way to contact her.
Visitor information was private, though I probably could’ve finagled her contact information from our business office.
My family did own the place. But if Blair didn’t want me to know her last name, if she’d chosen to end things this way, what good would obtaining that information do?
She could’ve left me her number or her last name in that damn letter.
But she didn’t, and I wouldn’t violate her privacy.
As the minutes passed, I felt more and more empty inside, the regret overwhelming.
I should’ve slept with her, should’ve given her the experience she’d asked me for and that I’d wanted with every fiber of my being.
Why had I been so damn scared? Yes, she was young, but she was still a freaking adult.
I knew her well enough to see that now—now that she was gone and the choice to act on it had disappeared.
Perhaps my hesitancy was what made her decide I wasn’t worthy of a goodbye, let alone her last name or number.
I finally went downstairs just before the breakfast buffet ended.
Not that I had an appetite, but I needed to do something other than wallow in my room.
I arrived just as they were getting ready to clear it, grabbing the last bagel and a banana.
But when I spotted Langley sitting with her parents, I decided to take the food back upstairs after all.
The last thing I needed was to make miserable small talk while I was feeling like shit.
Before I could make my escape, though, Langley came toward me.
“You’re alone again.” She smiled.
“Yeah.”
“What happened to your…friend?”
“She left.” I swallowed, the words leaving a bitter taste in my mouth.
“That’s too bad.” She tilted her head. “Wasn’t she a bit young for you? Looked like someone’s daughter.”
“She’s almost twenty and mature for her age.”
I had to laugh at myself, now using the same justifications Blair had used with me—that I’d ignored, always insisting she was still a teenager.
Langley rolled her eyes. “You know, all you men are the same.”
My eyes widened. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Only interested in one thing.”
“I’m not sure that’s any of your business. And you don’t need to lump all men together, either. Sometimes we just want companionship and chemistry. That doesn’t always come in the same boring, predictable, age-appropriate package.”
She grimaced. “Are you calling me boring?”
“Of course not. Just saying you shouldn’t be so quick to judge other people’s choices. My comment had nothing to do with you.”
She hung her head. “I’m sorry. You’re right. My ex left me for a younger woman, and I think I might be a little traumatized by that.”
I relaxed my shoulders and forced myself to take a breath. “Damn. I’m sorry. That certainly explains your reaction.”
Langley glanced back over at her parents.
“I thought this vacation would do me good, but it’s only made me sadder.
I have so many great memories here. And seeing you…
It really brought a lot of them to the forefront.
” She looked down. “Those days are gone. I know that. But my time here reminds me that I’ve wasted so many years of my life. ”
While I felt bad for her, I didn’t have the headspace to handle this conversation properly right now. But before I could apologize and say goodbye, she continued.
“And I guess I was a little let down that you weren’t interested in me.”
I nodded, trying to be sympathetic. “Don’t take it personally. Please.”
She shrugged. “Okay.”
“Look, I have to run…” I told her. “Keep your head up. Things will get better in time. You just need to ride out the storm.”
I wasn’t sure I believed my own advice, but I figured I’d try to leave her on a positive note, even if it was bullshit. I did wish her the best.
“Take care, Langley.”
“Bye,” she murmured as I walked away.
Back upstairs, I sat on the edge of my bed and forced myself to eat the bagel. I hadn’t even gotten coffee. I knew my head wasn’t screwed on straight if I’d forgotten something I was usually addicted to. Addicted. That’s how I felt right now. Like I was having withdrawals from Blair.
What a depressing fucking day this was going to be. I wondered if I should just check out early myself, since every damn corner of this place would now remind me of Blair—all the things we did and all the things we didn’t do.
My cell phone rang, and my heart leaped until I remembered Blair never had my number. It was my mother.
“Hey, Mom,” I droned.
“Hi, honey. You still at Midnight Key?”
“Yeah.” I sighed. “For now. I was supposed to be here until tomorrow, but now I’m not so sure. Might take off early.”
“Why is that?”
I tugged at my hair. “I don’t really wanna get into it.”
“Terry Munson told me her daughter ran into you there.”
Shit. Big mouth Langley.
I lay back on the bed and sighed. “She did, did she?”
“Yes.”
My mother fell silent, and I knew she was holding back.
I rolled my eyes. “What else did she tell you?”
“She said you were quite cozy with someone half your age.”
I shook my head. “She should mind her own business.”
“So it’s true?”
“I did meet someone who’s younger, yeah.
A sweet person who deserves better than to be reduced to her age.
Nothing happened between us, if that’s what you’re getting at.
It was mostly innocent. We had fun together.
That was all. She got my mind off my troubles for a bit.
And now she’s checked out. The story ends there. ”
That did pretty much sum it up, even if the reality was much more complex in my mind.
“How old was she?”
“Almost twenty.” There I go again.
“Well, you know I was around that age when I met your father,” Mom said. “But people don’t settle down so young these days. If she were the right person for you, though, I wouldn’t discourage it just because she’s young.”
That didn’t make me feel any better about my decisions. I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter anyway.”
“Are you going through some kind of midlife crisis?”
I had to laugh at that. “I’m not mid-life, Mom.”
“Not yet, at least.” She paused. “Anyway, what’s wrong with Langley? She’s always liked you.”
Langley was the furthest thing from what I wanted.
“There’s nothing wrong with her. I’m just not interested.”
“You’ve always been picky.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being selective.”
“Have you been in touch with Taylor?”
“No, but I plan to call him when I get home. If you speak to him, don’t mention that I’m here. I don’t want him to get the wrong idea and think I chose to come to the Keys rather than visit him. I just needed to clear my head before I came home.”
“I haven’t mentioned it,” she said.
Staring up at the ceiling, I murmured, “I’m long overdue to visit him, even if he doesn’t want to see me.”
“You have to stop worrying about whether or not he wants to see you,” she scolded. “He just thinks he doesn’t want to see you—or more likely, he pretends not to want to see you. But he’s starving for that connection with his dad.”
I ran my hand through my hair. “I hope you’re right.”
“You, my son, sound like you got run over by a truck.”
That was exactly how I felt. “I’ll be all right. Don’t worry about me, okay?”
“Well, I hope you can have a good time on your last day there. Your father and I toyed with the idea of showing up and surprising you but decided against it.”
“You should’ve,” I said, even if I wasn’t sure I meant it.
My parents still technically owned the resort, but they rarely visited, having delegated most of the operations to employees of my father’s company.
If they’d shown up, they would’ve rattled more than one person here.
Normally it was nice to spend time with them, but I couldn’t imagine how I’d have handled that while I was hanging out with Blair. She’d commanded all of my attention.
“Maybe next time,” she said. “And maybe one day we can all meet there with Taylor. He doesn’t get to enjoy it enough.”
“That’d be amazing.” I gazed out at the sun peeking through my window. “Anyway, Mom, I better let you go. Thank you for checking in, even if you were just trying to be a buttinsky based on gossip you heard.”
She chose not to respond to that. “Love you, my son.”
“Love you, Mom. Tell Dad I said hello.”
After she hung up, I tossed my phone and rubbed my temples, considering again whether to just get the hell out of here.
Then there was a knock on my door.
Who the fuck is that?
Not giving a shit about anything, I opened without checking the peephole and nearly fell back at the sight of her.
I blinked, suddenly coming back from the dead as I whispered, “Blair…”
“Oh my God, are you okay?” she asked, her eyes wide.
“No,” I growled. “I’m not fucking okay. I thought you left. I was fucking mourning you.”
Her face reddened. “I never left.”
“What the hell?”
“I never left,” she repeated as she entered the room.
I turned away for a moment and paced, stunned into silence. But as I took a moment to breathe, my anger transformed into joy. She was really still here. I needed to appreciate the second chance I’d been given.
My breath sped up as I faced her. “I don’t understand why you did that, but I’m not sure I give a damn.”
Her face turned redder. “It was an April Fool’s prank.”
My eyes widened. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
I realized it was, in fact, April first. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
She shook her head and looked down at her feet. “I feel so bad. I shouldn’t have done that to you.”
My emotions lurched back to being pissed as I raised my voice. “No shit, you shouldn’t have done it.”
“You look really upset. I didn’t mean for it to play out like this.
I left the note super early, and I planned not to let so much time go by.
But you must have gotten up earlier than I thought, and I fell back asleep for a bit.
I’m sorry you’re upset. It was stupid.” Blair’s voice shook as she started to cry. “Do you hate me?”
“Hate you?” I shook my head and laughed. “No… I’m too fucking happy to see you to hate you. My emotions are just all over the place right now.”
She nodded and wiped her eyes, still looking guilty. “In truth, it wasn’t just about April first.”
“Oh yeah?”
“I wanted you to understand what you gave up.” She inched closer. “How did it feel to think we’d never see each other again?”
I stared at her, eyes wide, my thoughts bouncing around like pinballs. “With the exception of the way I handled fatherhood, I’ve never regretted anything more.”
“Regretted what? You didn’t do anything.”
“Exactly.”
She placed her hand on my chest. “It was wrong of me to let you think I’d left, though. I’m sorry for toying with your emotions.”
“I’ll live.” My breathing finally started to slow.
She placed her hand on my face and searched my eyes. “You really do care about me. I know that now.”
I pressed my body against hers, a fire igniting at the feel of her breasts against my chest. My eyes burned into hers.
“I think I deserve to be punished,” she murmured.
“You fucking minx.” I gritted my teeth. “You’re gonna drive me to the madhouse.”
She pushed her tits more firmly against me, her eyes brimming with desire. I instantly hardened, somehow knowing I wasn’t coming back from this.
“Everyone has a breaking point, Blair.”
“Do they?”
I nodded. “Welcome to mine.”
Wrapping my hand around her waist, I yanked her into a searing kiss. I just hoped she’d forgive me for what I was about to do.