Chapter 11 Rose
It’s been a couple of days since Wes stopped by for tea and I fell into his arms—his strong, comfortable arms. His hands on my waist nearly had me completely incoherent, but I found my way and was able to actually talk to him this time, that’s progress . I’ve found myself looking for him since and wondering if he’d come by again, but he hasn’t.
I know I said I was worried about seeing him, and I do think that’s probably for the best, but now I’m not so sure. I thought his being back was what was bringing up my anxiety issues, but I felt okay when he stopped in the second time. And I can’t help but wonder what he’s up to today. I assume he’ll be at the park, but would he be at the Ranger Station? And what else has he been up to, other than being in a band? I still can’t wrap my mind around that one.
I laugh to myself, just trying to picture him at a party, on the drums, all sweaty . . . and I’m off track again. Okay, let’s take a step back. What’s the harm in catching up with him? Nothing. And the other day went well, so it would be fine. I decide on bringing over a basket to the park for the rangers, nothing big, and nothing exclusively for Wes. It’s something Lucy and I have done a couple times when it’s the busy season, and they always seem to love it. A little town love to help everyone through the crazy time.
Lucy helps me prep the basket with pastries and a few thermoses of tea, eyeing me suspiciously the whole time. “So, you just decided you wanted to do this today? Even though we haven’t done this in over a year?”
“Yeah, I thought it would be nice. It’s a really busy weekend.”
She gives me another suspicious look, but I make it out of the shop without her grilling me too much.
“Hi, Tonya. How are you today?” I say in my cheeriest voice as I head into the Ranger Station. Glancing around I don’t see any sign of Wes, only Tonya, who smells of campfire and bug spray.
“I’m doing just fine, what’s this?” she asks excitedly, her eyes going wide at all the scones and other goodies.
“We hadn’t brought you all some treats in a while so I wanted to bring something over.”
“Thank you so much, the guys will love this.”
“Are any of the guys around at all today?” I try to ask, innocently.
“Oh sure,” she adds as Wes walks out of the back room.
“I thought that sounded like you,” he says, his stare pinning me to the spot. His hair is slightly mussed, like he’s had a busy morning, and his sleeves are rolled up so that his forearms flex with each step towards me.
“It is me, I just brought over some treats and things from the shop for you all. We know it’s a busy weekend.”
Tonya glances between us, eyes narrowed, and interjects with, “I need to check on that family that wanted to rent a canoe, I’ll be back in a while,” then she heads out the front door.
I didn’t know they had canoes here.
“Thank you for the food. Any London Fogs in there?” Wes smiles at me, his eyes shining in the morning light, stretching in through the windows and trees.
“Actually, yes,” I say, pulling out a small thermos I brought along with him in mind. “I know you said you liked it the other day, so brought you some more.”
Wes starts digging into a pastry like he hasn’t eaten in a week, sipping the tea here and there. “So, I told you a little fact about me yesterday, but I don’t think I’ve learned any about you,” Wes says between mouthfuls.
“Well you know about the shop, that’s a fact.” I raise my eyebrows and give a little smirk. Is this me flirting? I wasn’t sure if I still could do that.
“Not a very big one, everyone knows that.” He gestures like he’s including the entire town. I do suppose he’s right on that count, but I live such a quiet, small life, I’m not sure what facts I even have to share that would rival his band bombshell.
“Well, hmm, I like to read fantasy books now.” Why in the world did I go with that “fact”?
“Fantasy books, hmm . . . Really? Fantasy?” His wide grin makes me go slightly weak in the knees.
“Yeah, like fae and magic, dragons. That sort of thing,” I mumble.
“Oh yeah, I know. I read a fair bit of fantasy myself. Love having a book to read in the hammock, or while the sun is going down. But my favorite is thrillers.”
I can’t help the way my mouth hangs open a little bit. He also has a hobby of reading? I’m not sure anything has ever been sexier.
I shake myself back to the present. Why did I come here? This is Wes, and while we had something before, we don’t now. And I’m still trying to figure out this anxiety he’s bringing up for me. I’ve closed that chapter, but clearly I’m still triggered by seeing him again, and everything he reminds me of. He’s bringing up all sorts of things I thought I’d moved on from.
My dad loved to read, too. I can still picture nights spent around a campfire reading next to my dad, leaning onto him when it was too late and I started to drift to sleep. My throat suddenly feels tight and I can’t catch a breath. Here we go again.
Wes sees the sudden look of panic on my face. “Rose, what is it? Are you okay? Was it something I said?” He reaches out hesitantly and I nod that it’s alright. He leans over and starts rubbing my back in slow circles as I shake my head and try to get a handle on things.
After sitting in a chair and drinking a couple of glasses of water, I’m feeling calmer and ready to make my exit. “I’m sorry about that. I know I said this has been hard, and it has. My body just isn’t quite sure how to process it yet, and it feels like a lot of emotions and things are jumbled together.”
“You don’t need to apologize, I’m so sorry if it’s bringing things up for you. How can I help?”
“You did great, thank you. Hopefully it won’t happen again.” His concerned eyes have me feeling cornered, and a little too exposed. “I should get back to the Bookery and see how things are going.” Standing up, I move towards the door and start to head out.
Wes reaches for my hand, but I’m too far through the door and he ends up brushing down my wrist instead, causing a shiver to race down my spine. “Thank you for bringing the treats. And if you want to talk about anything, I’m here.”
“You’re welcome.” Smiling, I walk quickly away, breathing in the pine-scented air and trying to remember why I thought it was a good idea to come here.