Chapter 23 Isaac #2
Memories of the marathon fucking we did over the weekend come back at me in a rush. The way he moved inside me. The insatiable kisses and his strong hands all over me, containing me and setting me free all at once.
“Where’s Evan?” I ask.
“He’s not here yet?”
I shake my head as Deacon takes a cursory look around, stepping into my space.
“He’ll be here soon. If he’s not, I’ll go get him.”
My hands touch his chest. They move up as his mouth lowers to meet mine. Fuck, the way I want him. His aura of total self-control is begging to be unraveled. There’s a glint in his eyes, too, that seems to ask for it. Try me, it says.
The kiss is soft, and it’s over too soon. He smooths his hands over my shoulders and looks me over. “Are you okay?”
“I’m okay,” I tell him.
“I’ve been thinking about you a lot.”
“I think about you, too.”
“I won’t like it if you decide to stop seeing me,” he says without a hint of manipulation or coercion in the words.
A pained noise escapes my throat at his naked admission. “Why are you saying that? You know that’s not what I want.”
He wraps a hand around the back of my neck. “I can’t imagine someone not wanting you.”
Jesus. I kiss him myself this time and make it last long enough to satisfy me.
I have to believe Evan wants us both. My stomach might doubt it, but if he shows up here tonight, I’ll do just about anything to get him to try.
With his kiss, I feel how hard Deacon is trying to plead his own case for keeping him around, and it’s working.
“Can I make you a drink or a snack?” he asks when I release him.
“Whose apartment is this?”
“Humor me.” He turns away to start exploring my kitchen.
“I didn’t even think about having food,” I admit.
Once he’s had a look through the paltry offerings of my refrigerator, he says, “I could put in an order.”
“Here.” I hand him my phone after opening it with facial recognition. “Use my account.”
He doesn’t argue, just leans casually against the counter with his long legs crossed looking like a goddamn dream as he scrolls for food.
While that’s happening, the elevator doors slide open again, revealing Evan at the back of it, hanging onto the bar.
Unlike Deacon, who looks like he just came from work in a gray button down and slacks, Evan is wearing soft, billowy pants, sneakers, and a blue sweater that matches his eyes and hugs his upper body perfectly.
It’s just short enough to reveal a strip of his abdomen.
His hair is styled with a middle part, grazing his cheekbones and framing his face gorgeously.
He blushes when he sees me staring at him and then glances at Deacon.
Eventually, he steps out and takes a look around.
The way I’m focused on his every movement makes me feel like a predator, so I tear my gaze away and gesture toward the terrace.
He walks to the doors, opens them, and steps outside.
I give Deacon a look, and he nods toward me. “I’ll be out there in a second.”
The first thing I say to Evan when I get outside is, “Hello.”
He’s already at the outer railing, studying the view. “Hi. Sexy place.”
“Thanks.”
“I don’t have a clue what I’m doing here.”
“I would thank you for coming, but I’m worried I’m about to get shredded, so I’ll just say welcome to my home.” I have a seat on the couch before my still shaky legs give out and send me into the fire pit.
“Funny. It feels like I’m the one who’s gonna walk out of here in pieces.”
“Not if I can help it,” I tell him.
He turns, spreading his arms out on the rail, and gives me a look that feels like an admonishment. “You scare me, Isaac.”
“How do I scare you?”
“You want so much. Two guys?”
“It’s not like I’m trying to have a collection or something. This wasn’t how I wanted things to happen, it’s just the way they did.”
“I get that,” he says with a sigh. “I really do. But you asked why my relationship with Hunter ended, and it was because of something like this.”
I scowl. “He wanted to bring someone else into the relationship?”
“Not the relationship, but he definitely wanted us to have sex with other people. He took one look at what guys did on Only Fans and thought—we could do that.”
“Did he need extra money or something?”
“No. I think he was just bored. With me. Or that’s what I thought at the time.”
“And now?” I ask cautiously.
“Now, I think he was going through a phase, and I was the only guy he’d ever been with. I think he was afraid he was missing out.”
“So what did you guys do?”
“Made content. Fucked strangers.”
“Together?”
Evan presses his lips together and nods.
“He hurt you.”
“He did.”
“That’s not what this is,” I tell him.
“It feels a little like it.”
“Come here.” I pat the cushion beside me.
He walks over and sits next to me. His familiar scent is an assault on my senses. All of them. I can taste him, feel him, hear the sounds…I want to fucking consume him.
“I know you don’t want to hurt me. I believe you when you say that. But with all this new information, the main reason I came tonight is to figure out if I can still work for you, and I won’t let you guilt me into it.”
“What will convince you, then?” I ask because there are depressingly few items left in my arsenal. About all I have left is money.
Deacon arrives on the balcony and hands me my phone before taking a seat on the opposite couch, across the fire pit from me and Evan.
Evan gives him a wide-eyed glance. An awkward moment threatens, but Deacon says, “I ordered a bunch of Italian food. Should be here in forty-five minutes. And I opened a bottle of red.”
“Thank you,” I tell him even as my stomach firmly objects to every word.
“What are you guys talking about?” Deacon asks.
I answer. “We were discussing what it would take to get Evan to stay at Polytech.”
Evan shakes his head. To me he says, “That’s between us.” Addressing Deacon and me, he continues, “What I need from you guys is to pick a lane. Once you figure out your business, I’ll figure out where to take mine.”
Deacon makes a face at him. He doesn’t look pleased. “It’s hard for me to understand how you can have sex with the same person for months and not be interested in them for any other reason.”
Evan looks called out. “I never said I wasn’t interested.”
“He definitely likes you,” Deacon says.
“I didn’t know that until Monday.”
“And if you had?”
I watch this exchange like a tennis match.
Evan drops the ball. He’s speechless a long moment before he says quietly, “I don’t know.”
I look at Evan. “Are you willing to entertain the possibility of having a real relationship with me?”
“You’re my boss, Isaac.”
“I can’t recall a single time that ever stopped you.”
“From fucking you? It’s not like you were pushing me away.”
“Well, no because when I do, you pitch a fit and start pouting. Showing up in slutty pants.”
Deacon chuckles. Evan glares at him. “What?”
“You’re kind of cute,” he says. “The two of you.”
“No, we’re not,” Evan says.
“We’re not,” I agree. “But we’re not a mistake either.”
“Okay,” Evan sighs. “That was a poor choice of words. I like you. I really do. I just don’t know what to do with your feelings.”
“You could try not belittling them,” Deacon says. “No one’s belittling yours.”
Evan looks shocked and offended. “I’m not!” Then he looks to me again. “Am I?”
“No, I just…it’s more like it feels like you’re pretending they don’t exist.”
“I’m not—Isaac—I just didn’t know. Like I never would have guessed. You’re so far out of my league, I thought I was just helping you blow off steam, I had no idea you wanted like—me.”
Out of his league? I started off just like him. As someone’s assistant with big ideas and dreams. “But now that you do?” I ask.
“Well, you’re seeing someone else now.” He gestures at Deacon. “You like him. Unfortunately, I happen to like him, too.”
This is where I kind of lose it. “So, I’ll back off.”
“No,” Deacon cuts in, startling me. “Look at me when you say that.”
I look at Deacon and that determined glint in his eyes, and I fucking can’t. Goddamn this. “I need a minute.” I stand abruptly and go inside. Shoving both hands through my hair, I scratch at my scalp as I escape to my bedroom, kicking the door shut behind me.
I’ve never wanted to be my straight brother so badly in my life.
It’s only a few minutes before I hear the door open and sense Evan walking up behind me. His reflection appears in the window. The view is the same in my room as it is from the balcony. I have some city, the Bay, and the bridge in my sightline. “Did Deacon make you come talk to me?”
“No. He reminded me that I came here to give this a chance, and I wanted to finish the conversation we were having.”
“I don’t even remember where we left off.”
“We were talking about my job.”
I shut my eyes. “You can have whatever you want.”
“If you and Deacon want to be in a relationship, why am I here?”
“Because I love you,” I say. “I’ve fallen for you. Obviously I didn’t handle that well, but I’m trying to fix it.”
“And you don’t think it’s a little late for that?”
“What I think is that if you and I are both interested in the same person and also have something we want to explore with each other, then we might be able to figure something out.”
“You mean between the three of us,” he says.
I remain silent. After what he told me on the terrace about his ex, I don’t want to make him feel like he’s not enough.
“I guess I can try that,” he says quietly.
I turn to him. “Really?”
“If you think it can work.” He fingers the placket of buttons on my chest. “This is cute.”
I stare down at his hand. “Thanks.”
“I like seeing you in regular clothes.”
“Yeah?”
“Mmhm. You look good.”
I keep my voice low since he’s as close as he is. “Thank you. So do you.”
The sexual tension between us is so thick, I can taste it. It’s always like this with him. He’s got a direct line to my dick—either that, or I’m under a spell.
“Evan,” I say softly, the conversation taking a back burner to my desire. We said enough, right?
“Yeah?”