Chapter 6 Sloane
Sloane
If ever I needed time to myself, it was now. I was still trying to process all the changes in my life. I’d lost my boyfriend, my best friend, and my life in LA in less than a week. Now, here in Chicago, the freedom I was so ready to enjoy had been stripped away too.
Monica demanded I stay inside my mother’s house until I could move into my condo and my new bodyguard could start.
And that was fine, because all I wanted was to hide my head under my pillows and pretend the world didn’t exist. As I made my way toward my bedroom, my sister dashed past me, bumping my shoulder in her race to reach the front door
“Sloane! Your bodyguards are here!” Skylar yelled before darting out of the house.
Something in my stomach fluttered as I peeked around the corner to see who was here.
The flutter was replaced by a sinking feeling when I caught sight of a bald head as my mom greeted a man who was most definitely not my biggest fan.
That feeling grew as he and the blond man with him hauled bags of equipment through the house, and my muscles tightened with every word spoken as the men chatted with Mom and Nana while they worked.
“Sloane, what’s the name of the man who’s watching you?” Mama asked as I tried to slink past them without being seen.
“He’s not watching me,” I muttered under my breath as the blond man glanced over his shoulder at me.
“Kolton Johns,” he said, his words causing my heart to leap in my chest. “He’s finishing up another job this week. We’re a little short staffed at the moment, but we’re doing the best to get everything installed on time.”
Racing into my bedroom, I stopped short when I found Nana standing next to a ladder while the bald man drilled into my windowsill. Little flakes of wood fell like snow, dusting my pillows with their mess.
I needed to get away, but I was stuck. Every room I walked into felt as torn apart as my life. The sounds of the drills and hammers hurt my ears, and I rushed into the bathroom for some privacy. I couldn’t hold back the tears that started to fall the minute I locked the door.
While I didn’t want Beckett or Brooklyn back in my life, and I didn’t want to return to the city that I’d lived in since I was a small child, I wanted time to grieve the fact that what I’d known was gone, and I’d never get it back.
I needed silence. I craved a minute alone, with no one begging for my attention or checking in with me to make sure I was safe.
After what felt like forever, it was finally move-in day.
The movers Monica hired had arrived late last night, and I was glad to see they’d finished unloading all my belongings before we got here this morning.
Still craving silence, I excused myself to my bedroom and locked the door behind me, breathing in the quiet it felt like I hadn’t gotten since before I went on tour.
It was a little slice of heaven—something that was mine and mine alone.
But the silence of my bedroom wasn’t enough. When I came across my swimsuit while unpacking, I knew I had to sneak out.
My new building’s gym left nothing to be desired.
Not only was there the kind of equipment gym rats would approve of, but also rooms for yoga, Pilates, and other classes that were offered to residents and their guests.
My favorite part was the pool. While it wasn’t Olympic-sized, it also wasn’t a kiddie pool.
Most importantly, it was completely unoccupied this early-March morning.
One great thing about swimming in an empty pool: no one was around to see you cry.
I spent a blissful hour in the warm water, soaking up the alone time and refilling my well. It was what I needed and, as I was beginning to understand, probably the last time I’d be able to do something like this alone.
Out of the pool and dressed in a tattered pair of sweats, I went back upstairs. I pushed open the door to my condo and breathed in a deep breath. Though it didn’t smell like it, and it still didn’t feel like it, this was home now.
There was a lot of work to do to get this place to feel like my own, and it was a challenge I was prepared to take on.
Already, I’d made my brand-new bed with the pretty bed set I’d picked out on my shopping trip prior to getting mauled.
And I’d gotten a couple boxes of clothes emptied before I’d found my swimsuit.
I was ready for this, for a new life in a new city.
While the sounds of Chicago were different from those in LA, I was familiar with this city.
I was from here—my grandma never left, and my mom and sister moved back a few years ago.
I’d always considered Chicago my home. Now, for the first time since my debut movie when I was four years old, I could truly lay claim to this city and call it mine.
That made me happy. So happy, in fact, that I let loose the song that’d been rolling around in my head since I dunked my head under the calm, still water of the pool.
“I could never regret loving you, but I’ll never forgive myself for letting you hurt me like you did.”
I sucked in a deep breath to continue the next line and was overwhelmed by the delectable scent.
I stumbled to a stop in the doorway to my living room, my eyes alighting on what lay before me.
There was a man standing on a ladder in front of my fireplace.
A man wearing a tight gray T-shirt and a pair of blue jeans that set my body on high alert, my fingers tingling and my mouth watering at the sight.
“Hot damn,” I muttered under my breath only seconds before he turned his shoulders to look down at me.
“Good morning, Ms. Rivera.” It was Kolton. The man standing there, stealing my brain cells, was Kolton Johns. Seeing his face again, attached to… that body… did things to me I didn’t want to ponder.
This was Kolton.
The bodyguard I was saddled with but wanted as badly as a root canal.
The man I’d seen in my dreams every night since I’d ran into him. I was hoping to avoid him and everyone else from his company so I wouldn’t have to feel… this again.
Swallowing down the saliva that pooled in my mouth, I gave him a polite smile. “Please don’t call me that.” I tossed my wet hair over my shoulder and started toward my bedroom only to stop after one step. “What are you doing?”
Could someone as well-built and masculine as him actually look so sheepish? I certainly hadn’t thought so, but he proved me wrong.
“I was hooking up your gaming console for you.” His voice pitched up at the end, like he was asking a question.
So I asked my own. “Why?”
Kolton climbed down the ladder, jumping off and landing on the floor with the grace of one of my backup dancers.
I fully expected him to come toward me. He was my self-proclaimed “biggest fan,” and I was still sporting the bruises from my run-in at the department store, which put me on alert.
Instead, he surprised me, clasping his pointer finger in his other hand and looking at me like he thought he was in trouble.
“I was just trying to help. You had everything all strewn about, and I finished the install early, so I didn’t have anything else to do. I can take it apart if you want me to.”
“No!” That came out a little louder than I wanted. I lowered my voice to a reasonable level. “No. Thank you. That’s really nice of you. Skylar will love it.”
He beamed, but my embarrassment at my outburst had me spinning on my heel to get as far away from him as I could. Unfortunately, I didn’t make it more than two steps before he stopped me. “Wait!”
There was a bite to his word that didn’t fit the affable man I’d seen so far. I turned around. He was no longer clutching his finger but instead looking down at me with narrowed eyes.
“Where were you?” He reached for me, and though I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, him snagging a lock of my wet hair wasn’t it.
I brushed the damp strands off my shoulder, tugging it right out of his light grip. “I went swimming downstairs.”
“Alone?”
“Yes, alone.” The tension that had left me during my swim came creeping back. “And it was blissful not having a single soul around.”
“You can’t do that.”
“Excuse me?”
“You can’t do that.” He dragged his gaze down my body, and though I was fully clothed, I felt like I was standing naked in front of him.
Crossing my arms over my chest, I took a step back. “I most certainly can.”
His attention snapped to my face, skimming across the lingering bruises near my eye.
His lips were pursed and his brow pinched.
“What if something happened to you while I wasn’t there?
You could have gotten hurt. Someone could have accosted you again.
And in the pool? Are you a strong swimmer?
Could you save yourself if someone tried to drag you under? ”
My throat tightened, making my voice come out in a screech when I said, “No one was even there!”
“Someone could have been. You were lucky this time. I don’t want this happening again.”
“Are you… fucking kidding me right now?”
“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” Monica asked, rushing into the room.
I tried to stand up for myself, but Kolton beat me to the punch. “Ms. Rivera went downstairs to go swimming by herself.”
Monica’s eyes flared. “Sloane. I thought you were in your room.”
I hated him, hated my bodyguard with everything inside of me. “I just wanted to swim!”
“We talked about this.” My manager took my arm and led me a few steps away from Kolton. “You aren’t to step outside your apartment without someone with you.”
“I didn’t!”
“Did you step out into the hall?” A scowl cut across my face, but she continued as if she didn’t notice.
“Did the swimming pool magically move into your bedroom without me knowing? Because if you stepped through that doorway, you stepped outside of your apartment, and we agreed you wouldn’t do that alone. ”
They were boxing me in, taking away those last bits of hard-won freedom. Soon I’d be nothing more than a prisoner in my own home.
“Ms. Rivera—”
“Quit calling me that!” I snapped.
Kolton’s chest rose with a silent breath. When he spoke, the words came out slowly, but each one felt like a slap across the face. “I’m just trying to keep you safe.”
I wanted to stomp my foot, to yell and scream and tell him to let me live my life. The thought of the last time I’d let my emotions run away without me had me sobering. I turned my face away from my bodyguard and my manager, then swallowed down the lump lodged in my throat.
“Fine,” I bit out, my voice quiet enough I wasn’t sure either of them could have heard. Without bothering to say more, I rushed past both of them and didn’t stop until I was in my room, the door closed behind me and my face buried in the mound of pillows I’d piled on top of my bed.
I’m just trying to keep you safe.
It was the same thing my dad had told me when he forbade me from dating Beckett.
I’d thought he was being overbearing—the way he usually was.
Cruz Rivera had ruled my life with an iron fist, making decisions for me on everything from which roles I was going to accept, which songs I was going to sing, and what clothes I was allowed to wear.
When Beckett and I grew close, I was sure my dad’s stance came from fear over losing control over me.
Now, I wasn’t so sure.
I should have listened to him. At the very least, I shouldn’t have called him an asshole and been so rude.
That was the beginning of the end for our easy relationship.
I snuck around behind his back, had Brooklyn cover for me so I could spend time with Beckett without my dad knowing.
I did all the things he’d tried so hard to ensure I never did, and I was a miserable little shit to him the entire time.
Less than a year later, he was gone.
“I’m so sorry, Dad,” I whispered into my pillow as my tears soaked the glittery purple fabric. “I wish I could take it all back.”
My life had changed in an instant. One minute, I was walking into the studio with him at my side to record a new single for a show. The next, my dad was on the floor, dead.
“I’d do anything to have you here again,” I cried.
In the aftermath of his death, I’d turned to Beckett for comfort.
He’d been there for me, leading me through the next couple years as my mom tried her hardest to take over for my dad as my manager.
But it was clear, Anita Rivera was not her husband.
And Beckett exploited that weakness, guiding me straight into the hands of his manager, Calvin, and the two of them took over the control my father had always exerted over me.
I’m just trying to keep you safe.
Freedom always came at a price, and I was so tired of paying that toll. I just wanted to live my life—to be free to do the things that mattered to me.
After wiping my tears on the backs of my hands, I grabbed my cell phone from the charger beside my bed.
I needed to speak with Olivia. I needed my friend to tell me I was going to be okay.
Because with Beckett and Brooklyn torn from my life, this cross-country move, and Kolton out in the other room, I wasn’t sure I would be.