Chapter 6
Elena
The moment Alex walked through the door, I wanted to scratch his eyes out.
He hadn't done anything wrong; it didn't change the fact that his mere presence irritated me.
His pity made me nauseous. Even if he was here willingly, I couldn't stand the way he looked at me.
That sad, helpless look... He made me feel weak and like I was stuck, and I abhorred that feeling.
Even though, objectively speaking, yes, I was weak and pretty much stuck.
But I didn't want to feel that way. And yet when Alex was around, I couldn't help feeling useless and powerless.
He sat across from me at the kitchen table, and I did my best to ignore him.
Maybe if I ignored him long enough, Alex would eventually grow bored and leave.
And so, our paths would part, and everything would return to normal.
Normal. Sadness gnawed at me. Why did thinking about normality make me feel so lonely?
“Let's go to the Botanical Gardens,” Alex suggested, snapping me out of my head. “The weather's nice today.”
He gave me a sweet smile, and the urge to scream consumed me. Alex always looked like he could read me. But he couldn’t read me, right? I could feel my pulse quickening and my palms getting sweaty. He had to get out of here. Now.
“Go away!”
My biting tone shocked me, but Alex kept smiling.
Why was he staying? No one was that patient and kind.
No one. Especially not him. I didn't know why he was so stubborn about helping me.
Alex wasn't known to be a nice person. If I annoyed him long enough, he'd eventually give up.
There was no room in my life for him and his pity.
It would only cause more pain. My eyes burned.
Why was I so weak? For God's sake, I wasn't going to cry in front of him!
My mother came into the kitchen and I lowered my eyes. Great, just what I needed.
“Maura, I was thinking of taking Elena to the Botanical Gardens. What do you think?”
“What a wonderful idea! Elena, get dressed. Some fresh air will do you good.”
Is this a joke to him? I left the kitchen without saying a word, wondering why life kept testing me like that, but I was getting used to things never going according to plan.
I splashed cold water on my face. No wonder Alex looked at me with such pity; I looked pathetic.
I hopped in a pair of jeans and ankle boots before heading downstairs.
No matter how low I felt, I wasn't going to show him any more weaknesses.
I wouldn't let another person walk over me like my father did.
Alex was waiting for me by the front door. Without glancing his way, I left the house.
“Involving my mother was a low blow.”
“You left me no choice.”
Just great.
“There shouldn't even be a choice. Just leave me alone and get out of my life. Then you can go on pretending I don't exist.”
“Where's the fun in that?”
My blood ran cold. I saw red.
“What?” I yelled. “Am I a joke to you? You’re spending time with me because you want to be entertained? So what, you want to get me into bed? Don't think I'm not aware of your reputation. I know what kind of person you are, and I don't have the time or the energy for that.”
Was this just a game to him? It was, wasn't it? There was no way he was here because he cared about me. I already knew that. But playing games... No. I'd hoped he was better than that. I'd been wrong.
Alex laughed as if I'd just told a really funny joke, while I felt my anger boiling. I clenched my fists.
“I'd like to think I'm a little more than just an asshole who sleeps with every girl he meets... Don't get any ideas, love. Uptight girls like you aren't my type.”
And now he was insulting me. Perfect. He patted my shoulder, a small, satisfied smile on his lips. Killing him was oh so tempting. “Oh, really? I feel so much better now. Thanks.” I turned and walked down the street. Let's go to this stupid park so I can move on.
“Hey, where are you going?”
“To the Botanical Gardens,” I grumbled, raising my palms to the sky. “Where else would I go?”
“Let's drive. It's a few miles from here.”
Alex opened the door of his dark blue Polo, and I climbed in, rolling my eyes. Could this day get any weirder? Once in the car, Alex huffed out a laugh. I silently fastened my seatbelt. I hoped he'd leave me alone.
“You sound so jaded. I only asked you to get in my car, not to have sex with me.”
Charming, really.
“We hardly know each other, Alex. For all I know, you could very well be a serial killer, and getting me into your car is the first step in your diabolical plan. Kind of like Ted Bundy used to do with his victims.”
“If you think I'm a serial killer, why did you get in without fighting me?”
I shrugged. At this point, I might as well die in an alley. Even if it wasn't a glamorous ending. “Yolo.”
For the rest of the drive, Alex stayed silent, focused on the road ahead.
I watched the landscape go by. Alex hadn't lied; it was a beautiful day.
Under different circumstances, I might have enjoyed this.
Alex parked his car and opened the door for me.
I had to admit: his manners were impeccable.
That didn't change that I still wanted to get as far away from him as possible.
We stopped in front of a small shop selling drinks and ice cream.
Alex tried to convince me to have something.
He was “inviting” me. In other words, this was a bribe.
Nice try, buddy, but I don't like sweets.
I shook my head. I just wanted to go home and wrap myself up in my blanket, but that was too much to ask.
“What do you want? Ice cream? Iced coffee?”
I kept shaking my head. Eventually, he'd figure out I wasn’t interested. The woman behind the counter grew impatient while Alex continued to offer me drinks with unparalleled calm. I had to give him points for all his efforts. It almost made me regret acting like a bitch. Almost.
“Bubble tea?”
I hesitated a second too long before shaking my head.
Alex noticed and smiled. “I knew it.”
At this point, I let him. The woman prepared a bubble tea with milk and an iced coffee.
When the drinks were ready, Alex beckoned me to follow him into the Botanical Gardens.
Not knowing what to say, I followed in silence.
A few meters further on, some tourists were taking photos, and I stopped to be a photobomb.
A duck face and a triple chin later, I continued on my way.
Alex looked at me, clearly confused. I shrugged.
“You gotta give them something to remember the locals.”
“Didn’t expect that.”
I accepted the bubble tea he handed me. Bubble tea was my guilty pleasure. The only sweet drink I allow myself to have every now and then. Alright, most of the time.
“What?” I asked, taking a sip. “Because I'm so ‘uptight’, you think I can only take myself seriously?”
Alex was distraught. I didn't know why, but I loved seeing his increasing confusion.
“Uptight girls like you aren't my type.” You'll see.
Okay, where was this pettiness coming from?
Usually, I didn't care what people thought of me.
But I was pretty, and rather hot. The only qualities I could give myself.
Uptight girls like you aren't my type. Yeah, right.
The way he'd said it had rubbed me the wrong way more than I cared to admit.
Alex rubbed the back of his head, not sure what to say. In this moment, he looked so young and open, something I didn't often see in him. “Um, well... yes.”
It was true that I came across as uptight and a bit haughty, but that was just a facade. I liked to make jokes. I just didn't have my sidekick to join in my mischief anymore.
“Touché,” I agreed, taking another sip. “You know, I wasn't always like this.
I had to grow up very quickly when my brother fell ill, but I wasn't as serious and boring as I am now.
I loved to make jokes, and to tell you the truth, my brother and I were a pretty hellish duo.
My mother used to go crazy because of us.
Sometimes we'd swap sugar and salt, or call strangers and try to sell them sex toys.”
Wait a minute. Why am I telling him this? The whole point of coming here was to piss him off until he didn’t want to see me anymore, not to tell him personal facts.
Alex sat down next to me, his eyes on the fountain. “I wish I could have met that part of you.”
“People change, for better or for worse.”
“I'll drink to that.”
We toasted. It was weird, but for once, there was a kind of understanding between us. I just hoped it wouldn't become a habit.