4. Blaise
Iwasn’t sure I was ready, but there was one thing I was damn sure of.
Nothing was going to stop me following Toby back to his bedroom.
His room was exactly what I was expecting—clean, tidy, and warm. The bed was made up with a smart royal blue bedding set, small lamps lit on each bedside table. A bookcase stuffed to the brim sat next to an oak chest of drawers.
There were no crumpled sheets. No stacks of dirty washing leaning in a corner. No cardboard box covering a broken window.
The walls caught my attention the most. Pictures covered so much of them. Photos of Toby with the various demons in his circle. There were more of him and Mori, which made sense given they worked together.
It wasn’t just the demons who featured. Frame after frame depicted Toby with various men. Some supes, others not. They varied in age, looks and size. There was no common denominator between them.
“Are these your subs?”
Toby shot a cursory glance at them. “Some, yes.”
“Doesn’t it bother you to have your past relationships on display?”
Toby tilted his head. “They weren’t relationships, Blaise. I know it’s hard to wrap your head around, but in every case up there we both went into it knowing what the outcome would be. I look at them and have nothing but good memories.”
I glanced again at one of the photos where a gorgeous redhead gazed at Toby in adoration. “So none of them fell for you? None of them wanted to cross that line?”
“No.” Toby turned his back, going to a drawer in his bedside table. Two small bottles landed on the bed; one I recognised as lube, the other was some kind of oil. “You don’t need to worry, Blaise. I don’t need love or anything like that from you. This is about finding your path and learning how to be happy.”
But what about you? The words I wanted to yell at him pushed against my skin. I just couldn’t get my head around the fact that this was all Toby wanted. That he was truly happy just helping others and getting off in the process.
Mind you, what did I know about happiness? Every time I’d thought I had it, it had slipped through my fingers. Wasn’t like I knew how to find it again either. Every decision I made seemed to fuck everything up further.
Toby stood in front of a plush rug. “We’re going to use the traffic light system tonight. Green means continue, yellow means pause, and red means stop. I expect you to use those words. If I’m pushing you too close to your limits, you must let me know. I’ll never be disappointed or upset with you for safe-wording. In fact, I’ll be upset if you don’t safe-word when you should. Understood?”
I nodded mutely.
He widened his stance, resting his hands on his thighs. “Like I said, this is all about trust. I’m not expecting us to have that, not yet. But if we’re honest and communicate, the trust will come. Safe words are a huge part of that. If you decide you want a contract with me after this, we can discuss which words you would prefer.”
“Why am I the only one deciding?” I blurted out. “What if I’m no good at this? I’ve never done this before. I might not even be submissive.”
“Let’s test that then, shall we?”
My breath caught. What was he going to ask me to do? What if I didn’t understand what he was asking?
Then he spoke a single word and my body reacted instinctually.
“Kneel.”
I found myself on the rug without realising I’d moved. The plush material was forgiving under my knees, like it had been purchased with this very thing in mind.
Toby brushed a hand over my hair and I found myself leaning into the contact. “Good boy.”
I bit my lip to contain a whimper, drawing a chuckle from Toby.
“I don’t think we need to worry about you being submissive,” he said huskily. “And as for me changing my mind about wanting a contract with you? That’s not going to happen. There’s nothing I want more than to strip you down. To make you laugh. To make you cry.”
He put pressure on my chin, indicating that I should stand up. I scrambled to obey. “Most of all though, I want to see how you look when you’re relaxed. When you’re coming for me.”
My cock pushed painfully against the zipper of my jeans.
“So no more thinking for you tonight,” Toby said, brushing his knuckles over my bulge. “All I need you to do is strip down and lie on the bed. After that, I’ll take care of everything.”
Okay, I can do this. Stripping down, I dropped my clothes in a pile on the floor. Toby’s lips twitched like he wanted to say something but stopped himself.
How much did I want to bet that not dumping my clothes on the floor would be on his list of rules? Was that what I wanted? Someone telling me what to do in all areas?
Yes. I didn’t even need to think too hard about it. Wasn’t like I’d been doing a stellar job of running my life recently. Maybe what I needed was a different hand on the wheel.
Toby licked his lips as his gaze swept appraisingly over my body. “You’re a beautiful man, Blaise.”
I grunted in response, ducking my chin to hide my blush. I wasn’t beautiful. Not like the other supes who filled Toby’s group. The ones who looked like they should have side gigs on a catwalk. My body was in good shape thanks to the hours I spent working out trying to exhaust myself enough to sleep. That was pretty much the only thing I had going for me.
Toby touched my chin again, forcing me to look at him. “I think I’m going to have you lie still while I tell you everything I find delicious about your body. Tie you to the bedposts so you have no choice but to listen to what I tell you.”
I winced. “That’s definitely a punishment.”
“Noted.” He chuckled. “Now, lie on your front please, face in the pillows.”
I did as he instructed, tucking my erection against my stomach. It ground against the mattress. It was enough pressure to taunt me, but not enough to get me off. Grabbing one of Toby’s pillows, I couldn’t help but inhale as I buried my face in it. It smelled of him. Raspberries and something else I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
A cap clicked.
“Just relax,” Toby said quietly. “All you need to do is feel. I don’t want you to speak unless it’s to safe-word.”
Easy. Speaking was hard for me even on good days. Less chance of me fucking up if I kept my mouth shut.
“What’s your colour now?”
“Green,” I said, my voice muffled by the pillow. Not that that would be an issue for Toby’s supernatural hearing.
The bed shifted as he presumably climbed onto it. The coarse material of his trousers brushed against my skin as he straddled my rear.
I started to tremble as thoughts of what he might do ran through my mind. Was he going to spank me? Poke me with various objects? Tie me up and edge me? Fuck, maybe I should’ve asked him more questions before we got started. Maybe I?—
My anxiety spiral was interrupted by Toby’s firm touch. His hands were slick as they pressed into my shoulders. My skin heated, my muscles awakening as he gently started to knead.
“Bonus of you being a fire mage,” he said with a chuckle. “Usually the cold oil coupled with my skin makes a sub startle. Helps that you run so hot.”
I frowned against the pillow at the thought of Toby doing this with others, which was daft. Of course he’d done this loads of times before. There was a whole sodding wall full of proof of just how often he’d done this.
Still, my stomach was fluttering, and not in a good way.
“Relax,” Toby said, his hands gliding over my back and kneading away knots as he found them. “You don’t need to worry about anything right now.”
I doubted he knew the thing I was stressing about was as ridiculous as jealousy, but the message was the same. I needed to relax. To just feel.
Was that actually possible? I guessed I was about to find out.
“Breathe in through your nose and out your mouth.”
My body did what he told me, breathing in more of his scent. An unexpected calmness started to wend through me. I wasn’t sure whether it was the breathing or Toby’s touch, but something was working for me.
Toby spent a long time on my back and shoulders, his talented fingers working out every kink and knot they came across. This simple massage was unlike anything I’d experienced with a partner before. Usually I wanted to get off as fast as possible before making my escape. I’d never just lain still and let someone caress me. Touch me like they cared.
Don’t get me wrong, I was extremely turned on. Every time Toby touched my lower back, my hips would instinctively grind forwards, putting more pressure on my cock. For some reason though, I wasn’t chasing the end like I usually was.
Maybe it was because the journey to get there was different. Right now, so long as Toby kept touching me, I was happy.
Once my back had relaxed, Toby shifted down until he was resting on my calves. The contrast of his trousers against my skin made me shiver. I could picture him, white shirt sleeves rolled up, top three buttons undone, sat astride my naked body. How his forearm muscles would be flexing as he massaged me. Would he have a wrinkle between his brows? Was he playing with his lip ring?
I buried my face deeper into the pillow to stop myself looking to check. He’d told me to lie like this, and I didn’t want to break a rule on our first time together.
His hands touched my glutes and I had to bite back a moan.
“Colour?”
“Green.”
“Good,” he said quietly. He didn’t hesitate, just got to work on kneading the muscles there. Thanks to the sheer number of squats I did on a daily basis, my arse was one of the few things I was happy with. Toby leaned forwards and I felt a telltale bulge brush my leg.
Looked like I wasn’t the only one who was happy with it.
I felt a ridiculous sense of pride that I’d made Toby hard. I mean, he was gay, and I was naked and stretched out under him. It didn’t take much to imagine he might find that a turn-on.
But still, the fact that he was hard for me…it had me glad my face was hidden from him.
Toby spent an inordinate amount of time on my glutes. I wasn’t sure when it happened, but at some point his touch became less relaxing and more arousing.
Without realising it, I’d started grinding my hips against the bed.
One of Toby’s slick fingers slid through my crease. A gasp escaped me as he stopped just above my hole. “Colour?”
“Green,” I moaned. “Please.”
“Shh,” he responded, running his other hand up my spine. “Just relax.”
My muscles went pliant under his touch.
Toby gently nudged my legs wider with one of his knees. Bringing a hand down on my back, he massaged my cheeks once again. I was barely aware of that though, completely focused on his other hand, the one that was now circling the puckered skin around my hole. There was nothing tentative about his touch as he massaged with the same firmness he had used on the rest of me.
Another groan slipped from my lips. My hips moved faster, pushing back against Toby as I tried to get him deeper.
Toby gave a low chuckle. “Greedy boy. Is this what you need?”
He slipped his finger inside me and my toes curled. An inarticulate noise came from my throat. Thankfully Toby seemed to realise it was a positive one, sliding his finger in and out of my hole.
“That’s it,” he said. “You’re doing so well.”
Was I? I didn’t know what I was doing other than fucking myself against his mattress and wishing his dick was inside me instead of his fingers. But if Toby was pleased then so was I.
The massage had been abandoned now. Toby was slipping in a third finger, making my eyes roll back in my head.
“Fuck, you look so pretty,” he breathed. “Now let’s see how well you can keep up.”
That was all the warning he gave me before speeding up. His fingers were fucking in and out of me like a cock, over and over.
My hips rolled against the sheets in time. They were wet with my precum, making the friction bearable. Oh my god. Why did this feel so good?
“You going to let go for me? Going to come all over my bedsheets?”
Yes. Yes. I couldn’t get the word out. Couldn’t do anything but ride his fingers. My pelvis was snapping forwards furiously as I chased my release. Toby matched me beat for beat, his fingers splitting me open as he fucked me relentlessly with them.
Then he changed his angle, hitting my prostate.
And it was game over.
A hoarse cry ripped from my throat as my vision went white. The sheets beneath me were soaked with my release, but I kept fucking against them as the aftershocks rushed through me.
The final one dissipated and I collapsed into the mess. I didn’t even care. There was no way I could move. How could I after what Toby had just done to me?
I was fucked. Metaphorically as well as literally. If that was what Toby could do to me with just his fingers, how the fuck would I stop myself from falling for him when he introduced his other body parts into the equation?
Just when I thought it couldn’t get any better, I felt the cotton of Toby’s shirt rub against my back before his breath hit my ear.
“Good boy.”