Chapter 20
CASSIE
I was outside on the patio when I heard the doorbell ring, but I didn’t bother getting up. I hadn’t seen Daisy since before the accident and I didn’t want our visit to be all about me feeling my way through the house, Daisy worrying every step of the way that I was going to fall on my face.
I’d gotten ready early and positioned myself on the patio instead, the umbrella shielding me from the worst of the summer sun while Jagger answered the door. He’d bring Daisy to the patio where I could greet her with at least a little bit of dignity.
She was my best friend, but I still didn’t want her to feel sorry for me.
I heard her voice at the front of the house, talking to Jagger in low tones.
Vigo was somewhere on the property with a guy named Rafe who’d come to audit the house’s security system, and Hawk had left the house for one of his mysterious solo errands, something he did at least every few days.
I still didn’t know where he went or what he did while he was gone, but he always came home smelling like fresh air and leather.
I tracked Daisy’s voice, bright as a bell, as she made her way down the hall and through the kitchen until finally, she stepped through the patio doors.
“Cass?” She moved around my chair until she was standing next to me. I rose to my feet and she threw her arms around me. “Oh my god… I’m so happy to see you!”
I hugged her back, careful of my cast and my still-healing ribs. “Me too.”
We’d talked a few times on the phone but I hadn’t seen her since before the accident. She didn’t let go for a long time, and when she finally pulled away I could feel her gaze on my face.
And more than that, I thought I could see… something.
At first I’d thought it was my imagination, but after a while I’d realized it was true: the darkness behind my eyelids had lightened, faint shadows appearing in the twilight of my vision.
I hadn’t told anyone. It was possible this was as good as it was going to get — Doctor Sterling had said I might get just some of my sight back — and I didn’t want to give any false hope, least of all myself.
I was due for another MRI in two weeks, and I hoped Doctor Sterling would be able to tell me more when she got the results.
“You look beautiful,” Daisy said, the shadows dancing in the direction of her voice
“Thank you. I’d say you look beautiful too but I wouldn’t know.”
I’d gotten better at making jokes about my blindness. It was either laugh or cry and I was learning to do both in equal measure.
She laughed a little, then sniffed, and I realized she was crying. “Very funny.”
“Sit,” Jagger said next to me. I’d almost forgotten he was there. “I’ll bring you some iced tea.”
“Iced tea would be amazing,” Daisy said.
I sat and listened as Daisy settled in across from me.
“This is such a gorgeous house,” she said. “And this patio!”
“It’s nice right?”
Daisy was a big design nerd and I had no doubt that she was having a field day with the Hawks’ beautiful home.
It was different from Daisy’s house in pretty much every way — Craftsman instead of Victorian, simple and earthy instead of filled with fancy antiques and art — but they both had good bones and equally good vibes.
And she was right: the patio was to die for, an oasis overflowing with potted plants and bordered by old trees, the hot tub at its center.
I could only see it in my mind’s eye, but I could feel the patio, warm under my bare feet, could hear the birds singing in the surrounding trees, hear the fountain in the bird bath.
“More than nice, and…” I heard her shift in her seat, then realized she was making sure Jagger was out of earshot, “… now I know why you chose to come back here instead of going home from the hospital with Bram.”
My cheeks heated. “You’re one to talk.”
Daisy’s guys weren’t exactly wallflowers.
“Oh, I know!” She laughed. “Jace, Wolf, and Otis have my engine purring 24/7, but I’m not blind.” She seemed to freeze and an awkward silence descended over our conversation as she realized what she’d said. “Oh my god, Cass… I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” I said. “You’re right. You’re not blind. I am, and I have to learn to accept that.”
I felt her hand on my arm. “I hate that this happened to you.”
“Thanks.” I inhaled a deep breath, blinking back tears. “It sucks pretty hard.”
“Here you go,” Jagger said, returning to the patio. “I brought you some cookies from that bakery in Blackwell Hollow too. They have the best cookies.”
“I know the place,” Daisy said. “The Golden Crumb right?”
“That’s the one. It’s a bit of a drive but— ”
“Worth it,” Daisy said.
“Totally.” Jagger put his hands on my shoulders and a bolt of lust shot through my body at the contact.
I’d been more than a little horny since Vigo had fucked me after our shower, but I still felt too vulnerable to ask Hawk or Jagger to take me to bed. What if they rejected me? Or worse, what if they agreed because they felt sorry for me?
Jagger kissed my head. “Let me know if you need anything. And don’t forget Vigo might be walking the property with Rafe.”
They did this a lot now: announced things that were happening so I wouldn’t be startled by movement or sound.
“How are you, Cass?” Daisy asked when Jagger had gone. “Like… really?”
“I’m… okay.”
“Really?”
I took a deep breath. “Really. I’m learning to live with it, and the Hawks have been great.”
“I’m honestly surprised Bram even let you stay here.”
“I’m trying to teach Bram that he can’t ‘let’ me do anything anymore,” I said.
Cassie barked out a laugh. “Good luck with that. I’m shocked the Hawks are still breathing.”
I smiled. “I’m pretty sure I’m the only thing standing between them and a death sentence.”
Cassie took a drink of her iced tea, then seemed to hesitate. “Do you need help with the iced tea?”
I shook my head and touched the table until my fingers came into contact with my glass. “I’ve got it.”
I heard her slide the plate of cookies toward me. “Don’t forget the cookies.”
“Thanks.” I took one and bit into it, my mouth watering as the chocolate cookie — not too sweet — mingled with the slightly bitter chunks of chocolate and crunchy toasted walnuts. “Beck really is the best baker in the area. Except for Bram’s girlfriend, Maeve.”
I had a standing order with the Golden Crumb for the shop and used to take a couple pieces off the top of the weekly delivery for myself.
We sat in companionable silence for a few minutes before Daisy spoke again, her voice halting.
“What happened, Cass… that day on the mountain?”