Chapter Thirteen
Cooper
The bar was dimly lit, the air thick with the smell of whiskey and stale cigarette smoke. I nursed my drink, the amber liquid swirling in the glass as I waited for Colton. The ice clinked softly against the sides, a quiet counterpoint to the low murmur of conversations around me. It had taken some convincing to get him to meet me here. My brother wasn’t one for late nights out, especially not on a weekday. But I needed to talk to him, needed his steady presence to anchor me in the storm that my life had become.
I glanced at my watch, the expensive timepiece a reminder of the life I’d built for myself. A life that was now teetering on the edge of disaster. The weight of my choices pressed down on me, making the bourbon in my hand seem like a paltry and pathetic defense against the encroaching darkness.
The door swung open, letting in a brief gust of cool night air. There he was. Colton, looking out of place in his shirt and tie, a stark contrast to the rough-looking regulars that populated this particular establishment. I could tell his ill-fitting suit was made from cheap material, and I once again suppressed the urge to give him money. It would just start a fight, and I didn’t have the energy for that.
His eyes, identical to my own, scanned the room, narrowing slightly when they landed on me. I could see the concern etched in the lines of his face, the worry that seemed to have become a permanent fixture since I’d gotten him involved in this mess.
“Cooper,” he said, sliding onto the barstool next to me. The crackled leather creaked under his weight, the sound oddly loud in the atmosphere of the bar. “This better be important. I’ve had quite a day, thanks to you.”
I raised an eyebrow, signaling the bartender to bring another drink. The man nodded, his movements practiced and efficient as he reached for a clean glass. “Thanks to me? What are you talking about?”
Colton rubbed his cheek, an odd expression on his face. The skin there looked slightly red, as if...
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe the fact that I got slapped by your girlfriend today at the courthouse because she thought I was you?”
I nearly choked on my drink, the bourbon burning its way down my throat in a way that had nothing to do with its alcohol content. “Allegra? She slapped you? And she’s not my girlfriend.” The denial came automatically, even as something inside me twisted at the words.
“Yeah, she did,” Colton said, accepting the whiskey the bartender placed in front of him. He took a sip, wincing slightly at the burn. “And let me tell you, she’s got quite an arm on her. Remind me never to get on her bad side. Girlfriend or not, you’ve definitely stirred up some strong feelings in her.”
I felt a mix of guilt and something else I couldn’t quite name. The image of Allegra, her face flushed with anger, her hand raised in righteous indignation, flashed through my mind. I pushed it away, focusing instead on the amber liquid in my glass. “I’m sorry, Colton. I had no idea she’d be there today. She wasn’t scheduled to give evidence.”
“Well, she was,” Colton said, taking a long swig of his drink. I watched as he swallowed, trying not to grimace at the strong taste of the alcohol. “And she had quite a lot to say about you and your work. I thought silence was the key to our success, yet this girl seems to know about our exploits? Care to explain?”
I ran a hand through my hair, frustration building up inside me. The strands felt messy, a testament to the long hours I’d been putting in trying to untangle this mess. “It’s complicated, Colton. But that’s not why I asked you here. It’s about Viktor. And the deal.”
Colton’s posture stiffened, his voice dropping to a whisper. He leaned in closer, the smell of his cheap aftershave mingling with the bar’s more pungent odors. “Cooper, I told you getting involved with Viktor was a bad idea. The man’s dangerous.”
“You don’t know the half of it,” I said, taking a long swig of my drink. The bourbon burned its way down my throat, a welcome distraction from the knot of anxiety in my stomach. I savored the warmth for a moment before continuing. “I’ve been doing some digging. Turns out our friend Viktor has a habit of double-crossing his business partners.”
Colton leaned closer, his brow wrinkled. The overhead light caught the faint lines around his eyes, making him look older, more worn. “What are you talking about?”
I glanced around the bar, making sure no one was within earshot. The closest patrons were a group of men at a corner table, too engrossed in their poker game to pay us any attention. Still, I lowered my voice. “Remember that arms dealer in Belgrade? The one who disappeared last year?”
“Yeah, it was all over the underground. They never found him.” Colton’s voice was tight, his lawyer’s mind already connecting the dots.
“That’s because there was nothing left to find,” I said grimly. The words tasted bitter in my mouth, a reminder of the world I’d chosen to inhabit. “Word on the street is Viktor had him dissolved in acid. All because the guy tried to negotiate a better deal.”
Colton’s face paled, his hand tightening around his glass. His knuckles went white with the force of his grip. “Jesus, Cooper. And you’re still planning on going through with this?”
I ran a hand through my hair again, frustration bubbling up inside me. The strands stuck up at odd angles, another physical manifestation of my inner turmoil. “What choice do I have? I’m in too deep now. If I back out, I might as well paint a target on my back. I’ll have Viktor as well as Rousseau on my tail.”
“There’s always a choice,” Colton said, his lawyer’s instincts kicking in. His voice took on that tone I knew so well, the one he used in negotiations. “We can talk to Steele, see if he has any—”
I cut him off with a harsh laugh. The sound was jarring, even to my own ears. “And tell him what? That he was right and I’m the prick who’s asking him to risk his life—and possibly his baby’s—to save my ass? Come on, Colton. You know that’s not an option. I don’t know why you even mentioned it.”
Colton fell silent, taking a long drink. I could see the gears turning in his head, and knew he was trying to find a legal solution to an illegal problem. It was what I loved about him, and also what frustrated me to no end. His dedication to the law, to doing things the right way, was admirable. But in my world, the law was just another obstacle to be navigated around. It was how I knew Colton would eventually leave me, just like Steele had done. Once he paid off his share of our father’s debt, he’d be gone. He would become a successful lawyer, earning his money cleanly.
“Are you sure about Steele? He’s your best friend. I’m sure if you promised to stop with the weapons—”
I shook my head, the movement sharp and decisive. “He’s got Ashlynn to think about now, and their baby. I can’t drag him back into this mess. And I’m not stopping.” The continued talk of Steele, now settled into domestic bliss with his pregnant fiancée, sent an odd wave of emotion through me. A life I could never have, a peace I’d never know. It hadn’t ever seemed important before, but as I sat in the bar, I knew it was something I’d never have.
Not while greed and ambition ruled my life.
“But you can drag me into it?” Colton’s voice had an edge to it now, sharp enough to cut. “And what about Allegra? Do you have any idea how worried and scared she is?”
I felt a pang of guilt at the mention of Allegra’s name. Her face flashed through my mind again—those expressive eyes, the curve of her lips when she smiled. I drove the image away, burying it deep. “She shouldn’t be involved in this at all. It’s too dangerous.”
Suspicion tightened across Colton’s features. “Yet she is involved, Cooper. She cares about you, whether you want to admit it or not. I can tell you care about her, too.”
I shook my head, trying to dismiss the idea. The motion was too quick, too vehement to be entirely believable. “It’s not like that. She was my physical therapist. That’s all. You’re reaching for things that aren’t there, Colton.”
“Really?” Colton said, his voice dripping with skepticism. “So, you sent me down there to ensure the right steps were taken in this scumbag’s case because you care so much about keeping the streets of Paris clean and crime-free? Because the woman I met today seemed pretty invested in your well-being for ‘just a physical therapist.’”
Before I could respond, a woman sidled up to the barstool next to me. She was attractive in a hard-edged way, all tight clothes and heavily lined eyes. The scent of her perfume—overpowering and overly sweet—wafted over me, oppressive and intrusive.
“Buy a girl a drink?” she purred, leaning in close. Her fingers toyed with the neckline of my shirt, a silent promise for an easy conquest.
I hesitated for a moment, my usual instincts at war with the image of Allegra that flashed unbidden through my mind. Her sweet touch, her beautiful eyes, so different from this woman’s predatory stare. “Sorry,” I said finally, gently but firmly pushing her away. “Not interested.”
The woman huffed and sauntered away, moving on to easier prey. I turned back to find Colton staring at me, his eyebrows raised in surprise.
“Okay, who are you and what have you done with my brother?” he asked, only half-joking. The question hung in the air between us, heavy with the implication.
I shrugged, trying for nonchalance. The movement felt stiff, unnatural. “Maybe I’m just not in the mood. Shoulder still hurts.”
Colton wasn’t buying it. His eyes, so like my own, drilled into me with an intensity that was almost uncomfortable. “Cooper, I’ve known you my whole life. We’re twins. You’re always in the mood. The world could be burning down around us and you’d still be off looking for one last fuck. What’s going on?”
I sighed, knowing I was caught. The weight of everything—Viktor, Rousseau, Allegra—pressed down on me, threatening to crush me under its weight. “It’s...complicated.”
“Uncomplicate it for me,” Colton pressed. His voice was gentle now, coaxing. “Is this about Allegra? Are you sleeping with her?”
My mind was instantly transported back several months ago, when I had accused Steele of the very same thing—of sleeping with one woman, monogamously. I gulped and stared into my glass, watching the light reflect on the rim. The colors shifted and swirled, much like the emotions churning inside me. “That’s none of your business,” I retorted.
My response seemed to set Colton’s hunch into stone.
“None of my business? Seriously? You do nothing but boast about your sexual escapades, but now the cat has your tongue?”
I rubbed my eyes, tired already. “She’s different, Colton. She…she seems to know me. Not Cooper Moreau, the arms dealer, not the guy with the fancy car and underground connections. Just...me.”
Colton was quiet for a moment, studying me so hard that it made me uncomfortable. I could feel his gaze like a physical manifestation, probing and searching. “You have feelings for her,” he said finally. It wasn’t a question.
“I didn’t say that,” I protested weakly, the words sounding hollow even to my own ears. “It’s not like that. I can’t…can’t let it be like that.”
“Why not?” Colton challenged, his voice soft but sure. “Cooper, I saw the way she talked about you, and I’m seeing the way you’re acting now. There’s something more to this girl.”
I fought to keep my emotions in check. “It doesn’t matter what it is. She’s better off without me, without all of this danger.”
Colton sighed, rubbing his temples. The gesture was so familiar, so reminiscent of our father, that it sent a pang through me. “Cooper, you can’t have it both ways. If you care about this woman—and it’s clear you do—you can’t keep her in the dark. It’s not fair to her, and it’s dangerous for you both.”
I knew he was right, but the thought of telling Allegra everything, telling her why I could never be any kind of respectable boyfriend—seeing the look of disappointment spread across her face when she realized just how deep in the muck I was...it terrified me more than any deal gone wrong ever had. The fear was a living thing, coiling in my gut, threatening to choke me like a venomous cobra.
“I don’t know what to do, Colton,” I said, my voice barely above a hushed whisper. The admission was hard to swallow, each word dragged out of my mouth reluctantly. “I know I can’t expose her to this kind of life. What the hell am I supposed to do?”
Colton placed a hand on my shoulder, his touch grounding me slightly. “You need to make a choice, brother. This life, or her. Because from where I’m sitting, you can’t have both.”
The weight of his words settled over me like a shroud. I knew I was in too deep, and I’d never be able to walk away from the dark path I was on.
We sat in silence for a while, each lost in our own thoughts. The bar around us continued its nightly dance of drunken revelry and animated conversations, oblivious to the life-altering decisions being contemplated in our little corner.
Finally, Colton spoke again, almost as if he sensed that I wasn’t going to abandon the business. His voice was soft, but in the quiet between us, it might as well have been a shout. “Whatever you decide, I’ve got your back. You know that, right?”
I managed a small smile, the expression feeling foreign on my face. “I know. Thanks, brother.”
As we left the bar, I felt like I was at some kind of dead end road. The future was mocking me, filled with uncertainty and potential danger. But there was also the possibility of something real, something meaningful with Allegra.
I sighed deeply. I couldn’t afford to think like that. Allegra was better off without me, without the dangers my world would bring to her doorstep. It was better this way , I told myself. Safer for her.
As we stepped out into the cool night air, Colton grabbed my arm. His grip was firm, insistent. “Be careful, Cooper. And remember what I said. You need to make a choice.”
I nodded, my mind already racing ahead to the dangerous game I was playing. The night air was cool, clearing some of the alcohol-induced fog from my brain. “I know. But right now, I need to focus on getting out of this mess with Viktor.”
“And Allegra?” Colton pressed. Her name sounded wrong on his lips, as if I was the only one who should ever be allowed to utter it.
I hesitated, then shook my head. “She’s better off without me, Colton. The farther away from my world she stays, the safer she’ll be.”
Colton looked like he wanted to argue, but instead, he just sighed. The sound was heavy with resignation and worry. “Just...don’t do anything stupid, okay?”
I gave him a wry smile as I walked to my car. “When have you ever known me to be stupid?”
Colton’s answering groan was cut off by the closing door. As I pulled away, I leaned back in the seat, my mind whirling. I had no idea how much trouble I was getting into with Viktor, what kind of danger lay ahead. But I knew one thing for certain. Bringing Allegra into this, allowing myself to care for her the way I wanted to...it wasn’t an option. No matter how much it hurt to admit it.
As the familiar skyline of Paris slipped by outside, I allowed myself one last thought of Allegra—her smile, her kindness, the way she made me want to be better. Then I locked those feelings away, burying them deep.