Epilogue
ALICE
THE ORDER OF THE HOLY MOTHER OF GOD – SWITZERLAND
The convent is silent—unusually so. It’s never been a loud place to live for sure, but the ghosts that linger in the corridors appear to be making their presence known—at least that’s how it seems.
Perhaps it’s because there are many ghosts in my past that will not drift into the afterlife. It’s almost as if they still have a job to and that concerns me for some reason.
I consider Rose a ghost now. She left a few days ago, and a huge hole in my heart, and my sister Tiffany sighs beside me.
“I hope Rose is okay. Do you think she’s in Washington now?”
“Of course.” I reassure her, but I share her concern.
Of us all, I am the one who possesses a sixth sense, if you like, and mine is telling me that Rose is on a journey that may not have led to Washington. I’m anxious about that and yet, as always, keep my thoughts firmly for my eyes only.
We reach Sister Agatha’s office, and Tiffany whispers, “I hope this isn’t bad news.”
“What makes you say that?”
My breathing is even, but my heart is racing because if it is, I will have a job on my hands navigating the fallout that will bring.
Tiffany is our younger sister and clings a little harder. I suppose she is more fearful than Rose because she hasn’t learned that life is a battle that one must strategize to survive.
She’s more trusting and liable to make impetuous decisions, and is craving something that is impossible in our world. Safety.
“I don’t know, Alice. Ever since Rose left, I’ve had a bad feeling about this.”
She is referring to the unlocking of our gate—the permission to spend one year in the outside world in search of our path to God.
Rather than allowing us to commit our lives immediately, Sister Agatha believes we should first live that life, so that any decision to remain here, within the Order of the Holy Mother of God, is made with understanding and intention.
I rap sharply on the door, smiling briefly at Tiffany to reassure her.
One year.
Those words became my mantra because I know exactly what I’m going to do with mine and it doesn’t involve following Sister Agatha’s plan for me.
“Enter.”
Her soothing voice calls us to her side, and as we step inside Sister Agatha’s stark den, my heart resets as she smiles serenely at us.
Comfort has become that smile. It’s almost as if she can wipe away years of pain and suffering with it, which is a gift I will appreciate to my dying day. She is the mother we were denied, and I have never had cause to doubt her loyalty to us.
“Take a seat, girls.”
Her eyes sparkle with reassurance, and if this is bad news, she’s doing a good job of disguising it.
Tiffany reaches for my hand, and we face her as one entity, minus a very important one on my other side.
Three sisters who became two in the blink of an eye, and my stomach churns as I face the possibility that I am next.
If anything, I hope I am, because Tiffany will require a few days to get accustomed to being on her own for the first time in her life before she makes the journey to adulthood, carrying a beat-up old suitcase and a nervous heart.
“There has been a slight change of plan.”
My heart beats a little faster, and I lean forward.
We say nothing, and she continues with an apologetic smile.
“Tiffany, this concerns you, I’m afraid.”
Tiffany squeezes my hand tightly, and Sister Agatha sighs. “Your escort has been held up, and so you must delay your journey for a few more days.”
“Escort?”
I stare at Sister Agatha with surprise. “I don’t understand.”
“Rose’s journey led me to rethink yours, and it was decided that alternative plans must be made for your travel.”
“What happened?” I don’t like the serious gleam in her eyes, and she smiles reassuringly.
“She is fine; there is no need to worry, but it gave me cause to issue you both a warning.”
I don’t like the sound of this and Tiffany is frozen in fear beside me as the gentle nun whispers, “I must warn you that not everybody in the outside world has your best interests at heart and so you must protect yourselves and approach this mission with cautious awareness.”
“Is Rose really okay?” Tiffany can’t help asking, and Sister Agatha nods.
“Of course. She is in safe hands, which is exactly why we must wait for your escort to arrive, Tiffany.”
She turns to me and smiles reassuringly.
“There is a bus leaving for town. A few of the other nuns are heading there for supplies, and it’s the perfect opportunity for you to leave without drawing attention to yourself.”
I say nothing, but my mind is working hard, and Sister Agatha’s tone hardens.
“I will send your suitcase on by courier, so make certain to wear your purse underneath your habit. When you reach the town, I would advise you to purchase an outfit from the thrift store, and Sister Marion will go with you and bring the habit back to the convent. Then you must take the bus to the airport where your flight leaves for New York at precisely two o’clock this afternoon.
I’m sorry for the subterfuge, but your safety is my number one concern. ”
“Safety?”
My voice is measured as my mind calculates a change of plan and, dare I say it, opportunity. There isn’t long to make this work for me, and my initial plan may have changed a little, but I can work with this one. In fact, it’s probably better than the previous one if I’m honest.
“I must stress that Rose is safe, but her cab driver turned out to be a criminal in disguise. She was fortunate help was at hand and she is now safely on her way to her destination under the protection of the family who kindly agreed to be your mentors for your year out.”
I am reassured that Rose is okay, and despite the fact that Sister Agatha hasn’t told us much, I’m certain of one thing. Morgan Sorcusi had a hand in this because that woman will not rest until our lives are not worth living.
She was our late father’s girlfriend and refers to herself as our stepmother—a title she does not legally hold, as they never married.
Though we were raised to address her as such, she no longer has any authority over our lives.
While she was appointed our guardian after our father’s death, we are now of age and legally responsible for ourselves.
I say nothing, my mind working hard as I process the information to turn to my advantage. New York, Sister Agatha says. Not if I can help it, because I’ve always had one destination in mind for my journey, and it doesn’t involve stepping one foot on a plane.
“When do I leave?”
“In one hour. There is time to freshen up for the journey and gather your passport, tickets, and personal items. Make certain you collect the envelope I gave you; it holds all the relevant documents to get you to New York, and remember to be on your guard and trust nobody until you have reached your destination. The itinerary is printed out and inside your passport, and above all else, push any fear away and face the next year with a positive attitude.”
A positive attitude. I hide my smile, because of the three of us, I am the one most looking forward to this.
This is my chance for answers. My mother’s death will finally be explained, because I have never believed she was simply the unfortunate victim of a road accident.
I don’t believe she is gone at all. Deep in my heart, I know she is still out there.
That is why my destination will be close—because my mother was the daughter of a banking mogul, and the head office is here in Switzerland.
I have used my time in the convent well and planned my strategy, and the change of plan shouldn’t affect my revised itinerary.
I will make it to the airport and I will check in as expected, but I will not be on that flight at all and by the time anyone discovers that, I will be well on my way to my desired destination and there is nothing anyone can do about that.