Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
D o you ever feel like everything is too perfect? That’s what my life is like right now. Everything is perfect. I couldn’t be happier, and that’s the problem. Life is never this perfect. It’s been three weeks since I handed Xavier my resignation letter. All three partners have been working overtime in an effort to change my mind.
Which is why I’m currently staring at a fruit basket. A fruit basket full of bananas. Why bananas? The card is from Alistair.
Bentley,
It’s absolutely bananas that you want to leave us.
Also, don’t leave us.
Alistair
I can’t help but chuckle a little. It’s funny, but is it enough to get me to stay? If I weren’t already one hundred percent certain, it might help to persuade me. However, my mind was made up a week ago. I’ve decided to stay. I just have to let the partners know my final decision and hope they don’t all hate me for stuffing them around.
And then everything comes full circle. Back to the perfect life thing again. So when is that shoe going to drop? Is staying what’s going to tip the balance on the scale and send my world crumbling around me? Is that when the universe notices how good I have it and takes it all back? If so, what will it cost me? My job? My health? My family? Nathan?
For once in my life, I want to believe that I can have it all. I want to believe that Nathan is right when he tells me that we are going to be fine. The countless little whispers of reassurance he sends my way are giving me hope that maybe he knows what he’s talking about. That we are going to be able to have it all and be okay. Then I think about my parents. They had it all. Everything. They were so in love. They were happy. And then they weren’t.
I open the spreadsheet I created, listing all the pros and cons of staying on at Christianson, Miller, and Warner. I reread it every time my resolve begins to waver.
Nathan. Huge pro. We love him.
Great bosses!!!
Friendly coworkers.
It’s the #1 firm in the city.
Great pay, probably too great for a first-year.
Lunch meetings with dessert!!!!!
O benefits (enough said).
I get to learn from the best.
Cons:
I’m dating my boss…
Okay, so my cons list might be a bit shorter. A lot shorter. But—and this is a big but —I’m sleeping with my boss! That has to outweigh all of the pros, right?
Argh, why? Why did I have to go and fall in love with my boss? Of all the people in Melbourne, it had to be him.
It would help if I could find some sort of flaw in the man. I’ve been searching, trust me. But Nathan cooks, cleans… He’s super intelligent, driven, successful, doting—okay he overdoes this one but I like it. He’s beyond good looking. He’s the full package in every bloody way. Maybe that’s his fault. Being too perfect could be a fault… I think.
“Argh!” I groan as I rip a banana out of the basket and peel it with a little more gusto than necessary.
“What’d that banana ever do to you?”
I jump ten feet in the air at the sound of Xavier’s voice at my doorway. That guy is like a damn ninja. I never hear him approaching. “Nothing. I just… never mind. What can I do for you?” I ask him before taking a bite of the banana.
“Just thought you’d be interested in reading this.” He walks into my office and drops a manilla folder on my desk.
“What is it?” I ask.
“The firm’s annual reports for the last five years. You should know what you’re giving up if you leave us.” He turns around, stopping at the door. “Oh, and Nathan wanted to see you in his office about something,” he adds before he walks out.
I quickly finish the banana, throw the peel in the bin, and ignore the folder Xavier just dumped on me. I don’t need to see their annual reports. I’ve already read them. I did that while I was still at university. Did they really think I wouldn’t do my research? Those reports are public record. Anyone with half a brain can look them up.
I give Tracey a smile as I pass her. I used to stop by her desk every time I was summoned in to see Nathan, until she told me not to stop anymore. That she’s under strict instructions to make sure I always have access to his office. She didn’t say it in a demeaning ‘ I know your fucking the boss ’ kind of way. She’s never given me the evil side-eye either. You know, the one that says: I know what you’re doing, and you’re a whore. She has to know though. As much as I’ve told Nathan not to give me preferential treatment, he does. I don’t see him call any other first-year associates into his office. Then again, the other two are specialising in family law and mostly hang off Alistair’s every word.
Tapping lightly on Nathan’s open door, I wait on the threshold. His head pops up and a smile spreads across his face. “Bentley, come in. Shut the door,” he says. He probably doesn’t need to tell me the last part anymore. Seeing as he says the same thing every time I walk in, it’s become second nature. Nathan stands and steps around his desk, meeting me in the middle of the room. “I was just thinking about you,” he says.
“Really?” I ask.
“I’m always thinking about you,” he admits, before leaning in and fusing his lips with mine. He grabs on to my hips as he pushes his tongue into my mouth. My hands flatten on his pecs. I think his chest is my favourite part of his anatomy. Or his ass—besides his cock, of course—because he really does have a good butt. Nathan pulls away abruptly, the door opens, and Xavier and Alistair enter, closing it behind them. “What did you just eat?” Nathan asks me.
“A banana. Wh…” My words die off when I turn back around and look at Nathan. His lips are swollen. “What’s wrong? Oh my god, Nathan, what the hell is happening?” I screech as he steps over to his desk. He pulls open a drawer and starts digging around the contents.
“Someone better tell me what’s happening! Or call an ambulance… something!” I scream.
“Bentley, calm down,” Xavier says.
“Calm down? Fucking calm down . He’s having an allergic reaction,” I yell as I rush to Nathan, who is now popping a couple of pills.
“I’ll be fine, Bentley. It’s just a mild allergy,” he says.
“Mild? Tell that to those Kylie Jenner lips you’ve just grown,” I tell him.
“I promise it’ll go down soon. Just give the meds time to kick in.” He wraps an arm around me.
“Hold on. You’re allergic to bananas?” I ask him.
“ Mildly ,” he reminds me.
I pull out of Nathan’s arms. “And you two idiots knew this?” I turn my glare on Xavier and Alistair.
They share a glance before returning their eyes to me. “Yep,” they say at the same time.
“I can’t believe you! You’re meant to be his friends, and you’d risk his life by giving me a basket of bananas. Then sending me in here after you knew I ate one?”
“Okay… One, it’s mild. He’s not dying. And two, how was I meant to know you’d come in here and swap saliva?” Xavier counters.
“Allergies get worse with exposure. Did you know that? One day, that mild …” I add air quotes to the last word. “…allergy could turn anaphylactic.”
“Bentley, it’s fine. I’m okay.” Nathan steps in front of me.
“Are you seriously defending them right now? They could have killed you,” I hiss in reply.
“Look at me. The tingling has already stopped. I’m fine,” he says again.
I glance back at him and pause. Huh, his lips aren’t as big as they were. But they still look swollen. Okay, so maybe I overreacted. Did I just imagine they were as big as his face before?
“You should go to a doctor,” I tell him. “What if it gets worse again, or your throat closes up?”
“Bentley, I’m fine,” he repeats. “Actually, I should see a doctor. Come on, you can drive.” He walks around me to grab his phone and keys from his desk. “You two idiots can hold down the fort,” he tells Xavier and Alistair as he clasps my hand in his.
“You’ve never gone to a doctor before when you’ve had a reaction,” Xavier comments.
“First time for everything,” Nathan says, walking past them and tugging me along behind him. “Tracey, cancel my meetings for the next two hours, please.”
“Okay,” she responds without glancing up from her computer.
Then it occurs to me that Nathan and I are walking through the office holding hands. I take a peek behind me, expecting everyone to be watching, to be gawking and whispering. No one is. Everyone is just milling around and going about their day.