Chapter Eight
Flame…
I popped straight out of a sound sleep totally confused. What the fuck? Why was I awake? The light peeking through the mostly drawn curtains showed dawn was just breaking, and the clock said six thirty a.m. No reason to be up this early. Then I heard it—Michelle yelling, her voice filled with fear.
“No. No, go away. Leave me alone.”
What the fuck? Not bothering to even pull on my jeans, I ran into the main room of the suite. I expected to find her arguing with someone, which would have been weird but, hell I was still half asleep. The curtains were open, the TV on but I didn’t see her anywhere.
“No. Please don’t…” she whimpered.
Then I saw her on the couch, curled up in a ball and…
asleep. Gathering her into my arms I rocked her until she woke.
“It’ll be okay. Wake up babe. Shhh. It’s okay.
” At first she didn’t respond except to wrap her arms around me.
I wondered what the fuck she’d dreamed about.
Tears glistened on her cheeks in the pale light like diamonds.
The shaking slowed as did her whimpering, but what triggered it? It must have been some fucked up dream.
Finally her eyes opened and she tensed, her going body stiff in my arms. Then she relaxed hopefully because she realized it was me. I had my answer when she laid her head on my chest. Pulling her onto my lap, I continued to rock her until her shaking stopped.
“Are you okay, baby? That must have been some nightmare.”
“It was,” she said, her face against my chest.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.”
“Okay. How about we go to bed and get some sleep?” At first I thought she was going to say no but she nodded her head. Carrying her into the room I tucked her into bed and slid in next to her.
No sooner had I gotten under the covers when she cuddled against me.
I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close, I didn’t realize how much I missed the feel of her in my arms. She rested her head on my shoulder, her warm tears dampening my chest. I wished she’d talk to me.
I didn’t know what to do or say. This was way out of my fuckin’ comfort zone.
My insides knotted tighter with each tear hitting my chest. I needed to talk to someone, maybe Candy.
Hopefully she’d give me some ideas. At least in spite of last night Michelle forgave me enough to get into bed and let me hold her.
I lifted her face and kissed her lips gently, offering what I could to soothe her.
At first she didn’t respond but then her lips parted against mine.
My intent wasn’t to get us worked up, just to show her I loved her, even if I couldn’t say the words out loud—yet I hoped she’d be able to feel it.
She tasted of sleep and scotch and I pulled back before it got out of hand.
Tucking her head under my chin, I stared at the ceiling wondering what scared her enough for her to have this reaction.
It was very un-Michelle-like and it worried me.
Just what had been going on while I was away?
Eventually her breathing evened out as she nodded off. But it was quite a while before I fell asleep.
Michelle…
I woke to the sound of the shower and the sun shining through the open curtains.
How did I get in bed? Pulling up the covers, I was still in my robe, and was more on his side of the bed than mine.
Then everything flooded back—the fight, the text message, and waking from the nightmare in Flame’s arms. Holy shit.
Remembering the dream raised goosebumps all over. No more scotch before bed for me.
“Morning baby, I hope I didn’t wake you?”
“Morning.” I was still distracted with the memory of the dream, at least until his towel-wrapped body came into view.
Hot damn. The sun caught the water droplets glistening in his hair and reflected like little stars.
If possible, he was in better shape than ever, his six-pack even more accentuated.
Amazingly drool didn’t run down my chin just thinking about licking him from his neck to the top of the towel and ripping it off with my teeth.
I guess the nightmare cured my mad, at least for the moment.
Now I was hot and wanting him again. Why did he have to be so drop dead sexy?
“Are you okay? You freaked me out last night. Do you remember any of it—the dream I mean?”
“No, not really,” I answered, lying and lowering my eyes to his waist. I couldn’t look at him without him figuring it out. I couldn’t lie to save my life, but I wasn’t planning on sharing until I figured it out. “I’m okay now. Thanks for taking care of me.”
“Damn. Don’t you realize how much you mean to me?
” He sat on the edge of the bed and took my hand.
Our eyes met and his were filled with concern.
I wanted to trust him, actually I wanted to push him down on the bed and fuck him, until we both forgot about last night, but I restrained myself.
I needed to figure this shit out and it would be bugging me until I did.
“I care about you too.”
“Is that it?”
“What do you mean?”
“You just ‘care’ about me?”
“Well, yeah.” What did he want? Me to profess my undying love for him.
I did love him but I wasn’t ready to admit it.
I was having trouble dealing with it myself, even without all this other crap.
Falling in love and having a permanent relationship with him would change everything.
Odds of me being able to continue to teach would be slim, unless we wanted to spend most of our life away from each other.
Why did things have to be so freakin’ complicated?
He looked at my hand and then at my face. I couldn’t read his expression, but it almost looked like disappointment. What’s up with him?
“I ordered coffee and some breakfast. Room service should be here soon. I know how you love your coffee in the morning.”
“Thank you. I guess I’ll grab a quick shower.”
He nodded, released my hand and went into the living room, coming back with a suitcase.
“When did your luggage get here?”
“I’m not sure, sometime overnight I guess. Pretty roses.”
“Yeah, thank you.”
“For what?”
“The roses?”
“I didn’t send them. I thought they were from the hotel.”
“Uhh, I don’t think so. They were delivered after I checked in.
It’s why I thought you sent them.” He looked at me strangely and put the suitcase on the end of the bed and unpacked.
I didn’t know what else to say. I couldn’t tell if he thought I was lying to him or what, and why would I?
How stupid would I have to be? Rather than get into it with him again I just went to take my shower.
We both obviously needed a little space.
As I shampooed my hair I kept hoping he’d come in and shower with me, just forget everything else for a bit.
A couple of times I thought I heard him at the door, but nothing.
It was my fault, I’d picked the fight and been bitchy.
I way overreacted, and took him by surprise.
Now I’d have to apologize. Damn I hated saying I was sorry.
Lucky for me I was usually right. Once I’d decided to tell him it was all my fault a weight lifted off my shoulders.
I shouldn’t have let all the shit from yesterday get to me.
None of it was his fault, except maybe the skank ho in London.
Stepping out of the shower I was in a much better mood.
Humming Closer than You Think, one of the songs from the first Raining Chaos CD, I pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.
I didn’t bother with makeup, and only combed out my hair, he probably wouldn’t even notice.
I wanted to apologize before I lost my resolve, and then I wanted more of him in bed.
I didn’t have far to look. He was sitting on the couch watching TV. His feet were propped up on the coffee table with a cup of coffee on his lap and chewing on a bagel. The aroma of fresh brewed coffee hit me as soon as I left the bedroom. I couldn’t decide which was yummier—Flame or the coffee.
Quiet as I could I crept up behind him and slid my tongue along the edge of his ear. He jumped, which I didn’t count on, and grabbed the coffee cup before it spilled in his lap. “Shit, I’m sorry baby. I didn’t think about the coffee.”
As he turned toward me I expected to see a pissed off Flame, but instead he had a big shit eating grin on his face. “Babe, you can sneak up on me anytime you want. I love how you touch me. Now c’mere,” he said as he put the coffee and bagel on the table and pulled me over the back of the couch.
He was still wearing only a towel and my effect on him stood at attention as he pulled me in to his lap. “You’re wearing way too much. What were you thinking?”
“I guess I wasn’t.”
Nodding he brought his lips close to mine, so close they were almost touching.
He searched my eyes for something, and seemed satisfied with what he saw because his lips took mine in total ownership.
Rubbing, then forcing his tongue into my mouth.
He swept over my tongue and rubbed against mine.
It took me a minute to realize the low moan was mine, and I felt him smile against my mouth.
As he pulled away he was still smiling. “Are we okay now?”
“Yes, and I’m really sorry. I blew everything way out of proportion last night. I missed you so much and I guess seeing you with that girl got to me.”
“You can be jealous anytime.”
“Really?”
“Yeah because it means you care about me.”
Laughing, I kissed him, it was that or smack him. “I told you I did.”
“I know but if other women bother you it shows me too.”
“Ugh. Men.”
“I don’t want to fight with you anymore. We’ve been apart for too long to waste time arguing.”
“You’re right. You were away too long. I was starting to think I’d have to fly to Europe and hunt you down.”
“I would have enjoyed being hunted by you,” he said and waggled his eyebrows. “C’mon. Let’s get you a cup of coffee.” He stood still holding me in his arms. Holy shit. I wasn’t fat but I wasn’t a petite flower either. I had curves and was padded in all the right places, and he didn’t even struggle.
“Hey, put me down. You’re going to hurt yourself.”
“I won’t. I’ve been working out.”
“You have? What started that?”
“Missing you, silly. When I couldn’t sleep after we talked on the phone I’d go to the gym in whatever hotel we were in and work out until I was so fucking exhausted I could sleep.”
“You look great.”
He blushed and grinned. “I’m glad you approve.”
“Hell yeah.” I smiled and kissed him again. He put me down next to the room service cart. Poured a cup of coffee and added two sugars and some cream. I was surprised after four months he remembered how I liked my coffee.
“Thank you. You remembered?”
“Of course. I don’t know why you’re surprised.”
Why was I surprised? We’d talked a lot at Christmas and we discussed us and what we wanted from a relationship. He’d texted or called every day while he was gone. I’d never been with a guy who’d been as attentive. So what was bugging me? Was I the one scared of making a commitment?
I would have been content with just the coffee but he’d ordered a shitload of food. He lifted one metal domed cover after another until I finally picked something to eat—a blueberry muffin and a couple of slices of bacon. Who doesn’t like bacon?
“What do you want to do today?” I asked carrying my breakfast and coffee over to the couch. The first taste of the coffee was always the best. Something about the hot, sweet heat sliding down my throat—almost sexual. Teresa laughed at me every morning when I moaned taking my first sip.
“I was thinking we’d stay in and play,” he answered with a wink.
He looked so cute I almost choked on my coffee. This is how I expected it to be, how it’d always been with us. Last night was freaky, just one more part of the freaky day. Hopefully it would stay in the past where it belonged.
I was about to answer him when someone pounded on the door. We exchanged looks and I figured since I was dressed I’d answer. But he shook his head no and went to answer the door. At least he could look through the peep hole.
He opened it and first through were Wrath and Teresa, followed by everyone else. I was very glad I’d gotten dressed when I saw them all come in.
“How come you’re not answering your phone?” Wrath demanded.
“Uh, I dunno. I guess it’s still in my jeans. What the fuck is your problem?”
“Breakfast? Remember doofus? At eleven in the restaurant downstairs?”
“Yeah doofus,” Chaos repeated. “We were waiting and tried calling both of you and when neither of you answered we got worried.”
“Oh shit, I’m sorry. I shut my phone off last night.”
“Well it looks like you’re both fine. But I’m starving so whatcha got to eat,” Rage said as he lifted a few of the domed lids on the room service cart.
“By all means, dipshit, help yourself,” Flame said, as he sat next to me again. “We were done anyway, go ahead and eat what you want.”
Flame sounded a little peeved but what could we do, it was our fault, neither of us answered. Until then I’d totally forgotten I’d shut my phone off after the text last night.