Chapter 5 #2
Miles didn’t get a word in as Emmett hustled him across the parking lot, got him into the car, then took off while blabbering a mile a minute.
Miles was overwhelmed, but the one thought that nipped at his heels the whole drive was how the hell a man this goddamn sweet managed to raise a monster like Selene.
Miles was still in shock when they pulled up to Emmett’s house.It was everything and nothing like he expected.It was lavish, but not a mansion.It was on the water, so it was definitely a seven-figure home, but it had a sort of quiet humility about it that very much seemed to fit Emmett.
Cosimo, he wasn’t quite sure about, but he figured he’d get to know the man in due time.
Emmett parked in the circle driveway, then hurried around just as Miles was climbing out.He carried Miles’s suitcase without being asked and let him through the front door with a sweeping gesture.
“What’s mine is yours,” he said.“Or…whatever.Basically, feel free to use anything you want without asking.We’re not fussy.”
The house was massive. The ceilings were tall, everything was tile, the paint a sort of pale latte color. He only got a glimpse of the living room as they passed through a hallway and then paused in the doorway which led to a huge kitchen.
He tried to imagine Selene growing up there.
But even as everything was starkly clean and very modern, there was a homey feel to it, and that didn’t seem like her at all.
He couldn’t picture her in her teenage years having dinner at the table with her dads or doing her homework at the counter.
He couldn’t imagine her living the life he’d always fantasized about: parents who wanted him. Who held him and comforted him.
Not because she didn’t deserve it, but because she seemed to revile it so much.
“…okay?”
Miles realized he’d drifted and turned when he heard Emmett’s voice and then felt a tap on his shoulder. “Sorry.”
Emmett signed something Miles was pretty sure meant, ‘It’s fine.’ He’d seen Selene use it before. “Please stop apologizing. I know today has probably been too much. I was just telling you that whatever you need, I want you to help yourself.”
Yeah, Miles was most definitely not going to be doing that.
At all.Ever.He’d spent his entire life trying to make himself seem as small as possible because when kids like him got noticed, it was never for anything good.
He’d learned to carry that with him as an adult, which was probably why all his bosses and department heads walked all over him.
But Emmett was doing a huge thing for him.He was not going to take advantage.
“Thanks,” he eventually said, voice a soft rumble against the back of his throat as Emmett stared at him.
Emmett frowned, but after a moment, he nodded and beckoned him along.“You’re probably exhausted.Let me show you to the guest house.”
“I thought you said it was a pool house,” Miles said, half-panicked. He reached out and touched Emmett’s arm. A guest house sounded a little too lavish for a free stay.
Emmett sighed as he turned back.“It is.I was trying to make it sound a little nicer, so it didn’t seem like we were throwing you in some shack in the yard.”
“Oh, I’d take a shack in the yard,” Miles admitted with a tiny grin.“Otherwise, it was going to be a friend’s couch. Or a shelter.”
Emmett looked freshly pissed, but he swallowed thickly like he was choking on his words, then jerked his head toward an alcove which led to a patio door.
It slid open and Miles caught his breath as they stepped out onto the deck.
There was a small road before open beach, and a set of stairs led down to a small but gorgeous pool.
He saw the pool house immediately.It was on the slope, close to the patio, and it was tiny.
It couldn’t have held more than a bathroom and a bed, but he’d slept in so much worse.
Emmett rubbed the back of his neck nervously, then headed down the stairs, fumbling with a set of keys.
“We don’t use this very often.We got this place when Selene was in high school.
We figured she’d bring friends around, but…
”He stopped and turned, his face a little pink in the patio light.
“Sorry.You probably don’t want to talk about her. ”
Miles’s shoulders hunched.“No, but…I mean.She’s your daughter.I get it.”
Emmett looked like he didn’t want to agree but had no choice.He nodded once, a little sternly, then turned and opened the door.
The inside was what Miles expected—sort of a beachy theme with a lot of pastel cushions and paintings on the walls.It was cozy though, and warm.The air was a little stale, but it was fragrant—something like lavender which was immediately calming.
The room had a sofa, a papasan chair, and in the corner, a twin bed with a thick duvet and more pillows than Miles had ever seen in one room.
“Yeah, so…”Emmett shrugged, turning so Miles could see his lips.“Bathroom’s through that door.Tub and shower, so if you want a soak, go for it.Cosimo’s kind of a slut for Lush, so if you want a bath bomb or something, just come up to the house for one.”
Miles couldn’t imagine asking Cosimo for anything let alone one of his bath bombs, as nice as that sounded.He hadn’t had the ability to pamper himself in a long time, and while he was terrified of crossing some invisible line he didn’t know was there, a long soak and a good cry sounded cathartic.
“And food,” Emmett said, loudly enough to make Miles jump.He slapped a hand over his mouth, then circled his fist over his heart which Miles knew meant, ‘Sorry.’
Miles waved him off.“I think I’m a little on edge.”
“Yeah.I don’t blame you.Fuck, I know I keep saying sorry, but…”Instead of leaving, Emmett walked over to the sofa and flopped down, rubbing both hands down his face and took a breath before muttering something.
Miles hated asking people to repeat themselves, but he knew Emmett would understand. “Can you ah…can you look up? Sorry, I know it’s?—”
Emmett’s head snapped up and his cheeks were pink. “Don’t apologize. I’m fucking up left and right.” He cleared his throat, then said,“If we’d known she was going to introduce us to the boyfriend she moved into her apartment, we would have cancelled the lunch today.”
Miles’s eyes went wide.“Why?”
“To spare you,” Emmett said.“We knew about Jake. I would have ripped Selene a new one and forced her to make sure you were secure before telling you that she was, well, doing what she was doing.We wouldn’t have let it happen like this.”
Miles gave a tired shrug. He wanted to care. He knew he probably should care. He should be heartbroken—or something like it. But all he felt was numb.“It is what it is, and it’s not really your job to make her be kind.And not to sound like I don’t give a shit, but I’ve been through worse.”
Emmett’s eyes were soft.“That’s not a reason to accept what she did, Miles.I know we don’t know you that well, but you seem like a really good guy.”
He couldn’t help but laugh.“Yeah.You seem like a good guy too which is why I can’t wrap my head around how she turned out the way she did.And I know it’s not the money.I was friends with plenty of spoiled rich kids who never had to fend for themselves, and they were never like her.”
Emmett let out a small puff of air, then looked up at Miles.“May I ask you something that might sound a little…insensitive?”
Miles couldn’t help a small smile.“You want to know why I was with her.”
Emmett looked chastened, but he nodded.“Yeah.I mean, we love her because she’s our daughter, and we’re morally obligated to.
But you seem like a smart man, Miles.A good man.
You’re incredibly gorgeous, and I generally have a decent sense for people, so I don’t think I’m off base when I say I also think you’re very kind and deserve someone much better than she is. ”
Miles flushed from his toes to the tips of his ears.He’d been complimented before.He’d been in short-lived relationships with men and women who took the time to tell him they liked his company, or they found him hot.
But something about the way Emmett said it felt…different.
He swallowed heavily.“I think I’m some of those things.
But I can also be messy.I have abandonment issues that therapy was able to soften but not really heal.
I’m afraid a lot.I’m deaf, but I don’t know where I fit in because I was never allowed to be part of any community, and it makes being with me frustrating for some people.
My relationships never lasted, and I was tired of being alone.
It was nice to have someone want me around for more than a few months.
I guess I just don't understand why she kept me around for so long.”
Emmett climbed to his feet and crossed over, taking Miles by the shoulders.“You have time to figure yourself out.You know that, right?You don’t have to settle for someone who treats you like shit just to stop yourself from being alone.”
He wanted to laugh, to tell Emmett that was easy for him to say.
He had money, a gorgeous husband, and a life that Miles would kill for and would likely never have.
He’d be a guest for a little while—a visitor.
Then he’d go back to his sorry existence, and he’d just be a story Emmett and Cosimo told their friends.
He kept all that to himself instead and took a step back.“I plan to make better choices in the future.”
Emmett’s mouth worked like he wanted to say something, but he didn’t.He walked around Miles and opened the door to a small wall cupboard.“Snacks and a mini fridge with drinks.There’s booze if you want it.But we’d like you to come up to the house for dinner tomorrow if you want.”
He wanted to say no to that, but he knew better.“I’ll be there.What time?”
Emmett stared a long moment before answering.“Seven-thirty.Text me if you have any allergies.I’m going to cook a feast.”
Before Miles could tell him that he’d be lucky to keep down a couple tablespoons worth of food for the next few days, the man was gone.
Silence fell, pressing around him, and he decided to lean in.
He took his processors off and set them on the counter, then let himself feel his profound deafness.
It was a comfort in that moment, and he closed his eyes, sinking into a dark void.
He had no idea what to do with himself, or what he was going to do once he’d worn out his welcome, but a least he had some time.
If anything, he could call Oliver and see if he could stay for the summer.
He’d get a job somewhere—anywhere—and then pray he could find housing because he only had one more year to go.
Just one more year.
And then the rest of his life ahead of him.