Chapter 16
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
MILES
The one thing he hadn’t expected was a boat day. Or date? It was hard to tell. Cosimo was closed off, but he was also really touchy-feely with him the same way Emmett had been before he realized that the older man wanted him.
He was attentive though, and careful with him in ways that Miles wasn’t expecting. The boat was too loud for him to hear anything as they headed out into open water, and he hadn’t realized he was petrified of being out in the ocean until they got there.
But after a short while, Cosimo killed the engine, dropped anchor, and they floated in water Cosimo insisted would only come up to his chest.
“It’s not the Mariana trench,” Cosimo said when Miles was peering over the edge. It was nice to be able to hear him properly out there with the engine now silent. “Can you swim?”
He could. That was one thing all the kids in his first group home had been taught.
It had been harder for him because his CIs weren’t waterproof, so he had to try and read the lips of his very impatient instructors.
But his desire to not drown was helpful.
He learned mostly with intuition and his ability to float like no one else could.
“I like the ocean. I just, you know, don’t like what might be lurking under the water.”
Cosimo wrapped both arms around Miles’s waist and hooked his chin on his shoulder. “Like them?”
Miles squinted through his sunglasses and then saw them. Dorsal fins. Sharks? No. The curved body said otherwise. “Oh my god, dolphins?”
Cosimo chuckled against his ear. Miles could hear it, but he could also feel the rumble against his back. He loved the man’s laughter. “Don’t tell me they’re your favorite.”
“No.” Miles smiled softly, then lifted his hand and signed, ‘Jellyfish.’
Though he couldn’t hear it, he felt Cosimo suck in a sharp breath, then sigh it out. “Emmett taught you that one, didn’t he?”
“He did.”
After what felt like a short forever, Cosimo trailed fingers down Miles’s arm, stopping when they met his watch. “This is nice.”
“I didn’t steal it if that’s what you’re thinking,” Miles said sharply.
Cosimo sucked in a breath. “Is that what I said?”
“No, but…” He trailed off. That wasn’t really fair, he knew. But he’d been accused of it several times when he was a child, and more than once as an adult. A man like him had no business owning a Rolex. Even if it was old and slightly tarnished.
Spinning him around gently, Cosimo looked into his eyes. “It looks important.”
“It was my grandpa’s. He and my grandma took me in when I was little.
After…” His voice cracked and he cleared his throat.
“When CPS came and took me from my mom, my grandparents got custody of me. My grandpa died, and my grandma had to go into a memory care facility.” He took a long breath.
“CPS came and got me again. They only let me take a backpack with my stuff in it. I don’t remember a lot, but I remember taking the watch and hiding it in the front pocket of my teddy bear.
He wore overalls,” Miles said with a small grin, “so it was easy to hide. No one ever found it. At least, not when I was that little.”
Cosimo reached up and brushed hair off Miles’s forehead. “That must have been hard.”
Shrugging, Miles turned back away from him, gazing at the dolphins who were now bobbing lazily around the top of the water. “I don’t remember a lot. I remember being really lonely and sad. And frustrated. I couldn’t hear then. I was totally deaf.”
“Did your grandparents sign with you?”
Miles snorted and shook his head. “Not actual sign language. They made signs up so I could ask for the stuff I needed. They probably meant to teach me eventually, but the care home thought these were easier.” He tapped his processor on the right, then reached down and cupped his hand around the watch.
“This was the one thing I never wanted to sell, no matter how desperate I got. It’s the only thing I have left of anyone.
My mom died of an overdose when I was six, and no one ever heard from my dad again, so yeah. I can’t part with it.”
His throat felt tight. He hadn’t talked about this stuff in years. Not since he first started therapy and had to drag up all those old, rusted memories of what shaped his formative years. But it was easier now. Easier with him.
Cosimo’s own fingers trailed down to meet his, closing warmly over him in a tight grasp. It was sweet. Tender. Grounding. It was completely and entirely unexpected, and Miles swore he never wanted that moment to end.
“Thank you for sharing that with me.”
Miles smiled to himself and shrugged. “You and Emmett make me feel safe.”
Cosimo jolted like he wasn’t expecting Miles to say that. After another moment of silence, the pair of them rocking with the gentle waves, Cosimo took Miles by the chin and turned his face. Cosimo’s lips brushed the side of his jaw. “Tell me that holding you this way is okay.”
His eyes closed and he leaned into the touch. “It’s okay. It’s really, really okay.”
A warm hand moved him, spinning him. Cosimo pushed his sunglasses up, so Miles did the same.
It was bright, but being able to see his eyes meant a lot.
“I want this to work. I know I’m not the most open guy, and I know that we probably need more time to figure us out.
But if I ever made you think that I’m not in this all the way?—”
“I didn’t,” Miles said. “I don’t think that.” He was half-lying. He’d wondered. His defenses were up because Cosimo had been making himself scarce all week. But this felt so different.
Cosimo looked like he didn’t believe him, and rightfully so. “I know how I’ve been. But I want you to know that I’m trying. And I’m happy you’re here.”
That meant the world to Miles. He reached up and touched Cosimo’s jaw. His hair was softer than he expected, and his skin was sun warm. They weren’t going to kiss. He knew that just by looking at him, but that was okay.
There was hope on the horizon, and Miles was beyond excited to see what was coming next.
Sunday night, Miles slept, but not well.He’d spoken to Emmett several times during the weekend. He FaceTimed him at least four times a day to check in and make sure he was happy. And he was. Miles missed him, but with Cosimo being attentive, he was no longer lonely.
Then, Sunday night, Cosimo had been called in for an emergency, and Miles was actually on his own for the first time since he left Selene. He knew that Emmett was coming back on the red eye and would be there when he woke up, so he forced himself to eat a sandwich and turn in early.
Instead of sleeping, however, he watched Emmett’s flight tracker, dozing off when he saw the plane cresting over Virginia.
He woke feeling very alone, but then he saw how far the sun was up in the sky and knew that Emmett was back. Sitting up, he glanced around and realized there were signs that the man had been in to check on him.
There was water on his nightstand and a small plate of cut fruit just the way Emmett laid out every morning.He had no idea what was waiting for him outside the guest room door, but he was ready to find out.
Swinging his legs over the edge, he pulled the water close and then spied a scribbled Post-it beside it.
Sweetness , it read, and Miles’s heart began to thrash. You looked too peaceful to wake.I’ll be in the kitchen making breakfast.Eat the fruit and drink your water, then come find me.-Daddy
Me.Not us.
Had Cosimo changed his mind?Had he read their weekend together all wrong?
He didn’t think so considering that Emmett was still calling him sweetness and calling himself Daddy.But he didn’t want to jump to conclusions.He meant what he said—his greatest fear was them deciding they didn’t want him because he could already feel that his heart was in this.
Putting his processors on, he waited for them to fire up, then padded down the hall, following the sound of light music into the kitchen. There was the smell of something cooking, and then he caught sight of Emmett at the counter, looking over at him with a grin.
“Good morning, gorgeous.”
Miles’s heart fluttered in his chest. “Morning.” He started toward Emmett.“Where’s—”His words cut off when he came fully around the corner. He froze.
Cosimo was on his knees beside Emmett’s leg.He was entirely naked, his hands on his thighs, face tipped down, shoulders relaxed.He had a gag in his mouth—one that Miles had seen a couple of times in videos.
If it was anything like those, then there was something thick in his mouth, pressing down on his tongue. Like a dildo or a plug.
Emmett was slow to move, gently touching Miles’s chin, drawing his gaze up.“He’s okay. He had a rough night at work, and he needed me to help him when I got in. I promise he’s not in any distress, and this is what he wants.”
“No, I know.”Miles’s voice was a little weak, but he hoped his tone sounded honest because he was telling the truth.He could tell from the way Cosimo was kneeling, from the way he held his back and his arms, that he was where he wanted to be.
Emmett sighed and leaned in to take a kiss which Miles gave happily.
Their tongues pressed together, and Emmett let out a soft hum before breaking away.
“For now, we’re not going to address him, okay?
He can’t hear anything right now. I’ve put noise cancelling ear molds in his ears.
His job right now is to kneel and follow my touch commands.
Are you sure you’re okay watching this?”
Miles shivered.There was something hot in him, something that wanted to play.He wanted to hear Emmett’s low, commanding voice telling him what to do.
“What are you thinking?” Emmett asked.
Miles shook his head, but Emmett reached for his hand and squeezed hard enough to tell him it was a warning.
“Be a good boy.When I ask a question, I expect an honest answer, even if it’s embarrassing.”