25. Declan
DECLAN
I thought Iris’s idea of going on a fake date was ridiculous until I actually sat down and realized I have her undivided attention for at least two hours.
It reminds me of our honeymoon and the dinner we had together.
Except this time, she is solely focused on putting on a show while I’m more interested in getting to know her.
Not the person she is during work hours or the hidden glimpses I get when she lets her guard down, but the real her.
I take advantage of the reporter's bathroom break to press her for more information. “If you didn’t have to work, what would you do on weekends?”
She rears back. “Like if I had a day off?”
“You have Sundays off.”
“I’m usually too dead to move by then, so I prefer vegetating in my bedroom. I’ll only come out for water and food.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m exhausted. Working for you sucks up all my energy so by the time I get to the weekend, I’m running on fumes.”
This conversation is quickly taking a turn back to work, and for once, I have no interest in speaking to Iris about business.
“Fine. What would you do if you weren’t tired or working?”
She laughs. “Honestly, I have no clue. The things I used to do don’t really apply anymore.”
“Like?”
“Grabbing brunch with friends. Spending the whole day movie hopping. People watching at the zoo. The options are endless really. I’m pretty easy to entertain, so long as it isn’t anything that requires much thinking.”
“When’s the last time you did any of that?”
She looks up at the ceiling. “Huh. Cal and I went to the movies a couple months ago.”
“Together?”
“No. We went to separate theaters and called each other afterward to discuss the plots.” She laughs. “Of course we went together. Who else do I have to go with?”
“A boyfriend?”
“After the last one ended in a rejected proposal, no.”
A pity. “What about a friend?”
“Cal is my friend.”
“Another friend? Preferably of the same gender?”
Her laugh comes out sad. “I don’t have any more of those.”
“Why not?”
She looks down at her plate. “Turns out people stop inviting you places when all you do is say no. ”
“Why did you say no?”
“We lived two very different lifestyles. Most of my friends had nine-to-five jobs and worked only five days a week. At first, I tried to keep up with them, but eventually I was burning myself out. I had to choose between my job and my life, and we know how that went.” She motions toward me.
The look on her face stops me from asking anything else. A strange feeling in my gut comes to life, and I can only label it as one thing.
Guilt. It’s my fault she has no friends. Well, none except for Cal and me, that is.
You’re the one who told her you don’t want to be her friend.
My stomach churns as I consider how I rejected her friendship. With so few left, I’m sure she takes them very seriously.
That’s why she helped you in the first place. She really does consider you a friend.
Except I don’t want to be her friend. Not when she elicits all these feelings inside of me that are nothing close to platonic.
Who said you can’t be both?
I should have never ordered another drink after our empty plates were removed from in front of us. The amber liquid serves as a reminder of my moment of weakness. Iris was ready to go the moment the reporter paid her bill and left, but I was the one who wanted to stay.
The thought alone pains me more than I ever care to admit.
I take a sip of my drink, only allowing the smallest amount of liquid to slip past my lips.
Iris seems somewhat perturbed at how I make an ounce of whiskey last longer than all her past relationships combined.
I’m selfish for keeping her out this late on a weeknight, but I can’t help it.
Watching her speak about topics besides work is fascinating.
She talks until she’s breathless, filling the silence I have grown accustomed to with her endless chatter. Every subject we touch on she talks about with passion and intrigue.
A dilapidated house she saw while driving home that seemed perfect for a renovation. How much fun she has visiting her mother’s classroom. Her plan to attend Nana’s cornhole championship coming up next week at church.
I didn’t even know there was such a thing as cornhole championships, let alone that Nana was the reigning champ.
I’m thoroughly enjoying my time with Iris, to the point that I don’t want it to end.
“Are you almost done?” Iris shatters my thoughts with the stark reality.
“With?”
She glares at my drink. “Your overpriced glass of whiskey.”
“I can afford it.”
“You have the same bottle at the house for half the cost.”
But would I have the same company? Probably not. The thought of drinking alone tonight seems unbearable. I’ve spent an entire lifetime by myself, and while it was never a problem before, it is slowly becoming intolerable.
“I’m enjoying the view.”
She glances out the window. “Says the man who hasn’t even looked outside once.”
“That’s not the view I’m talking about.”
Her eyes find their way back to mine. I’m startled when she drops her head back as a laugh explodes out of her. It’s rough and raspy, drawing the attention of multiple patrons. Warmth rushes through me at the sound despite knowing her amusement is at my expense.
By the time she looks back at me, her eyes have a watery shine to them and she can’t seem to take enough deep breaths.
My hand tightens around the glass as I take another chug. “What the hell was that?”
She dabs at the corners of her eyes. “The reporter left. You don’t need to pretend anymore.”
“I’m not pretending.”
“That’s… concerning .”
“I don’t see it as such.”
“No.”
“ No? ” What the hell is she even talking about?
“No.” She speaks with a firmer voice this time. “That’s not how this is supposed to go.”
“How exactly is this supposed to go ?” I won’t admit I’m confused, but damn, I feel it. Everything about her confuses me. From the pinched feeling in my chest whenever she laughs to the draw I feel toward her at all hours of the day.
“We work together.”
“And?”
Her deep sigh echoes the one building inside of me. “We have a deal.”
“Are you stating the obvious solely to annoy me?”
“Of course not. I’m simply pointing out the stakes. There is far too much riding on our relationship for us to screw it up because we’re horny and confused.”
I don’t miss the way she says we , although I think she did.
“I’m not confused. Far from it, actually. I know exactly what I want.”
“And what is that?”
“You.”
The way she laughs makes me want to stifle it with my lips against hers. I settle on latching onto her hand, which sobers her enough to stop laughing at my expense.
She tries to rip her palm out of mine, but I hold on.
“This has to be some kind of sick joke.”
The muscles in my jaw ache from the way I grind my teeth together. “How so?”
“You can’t want me. Not like that at least.”
“Why not?”
“This isn’t meant to be anything but a contractual obligation.”
“It’s what we say it is.” I trace over the diamond on her finger, drawing a sharp breath from her.
Her eyes widen. “Oh my God. Are you actually suggesting that we hook up?”
I’ve always been a straight shooter—to a fault. “Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to.”
Her bitter laugh sends a wave of uneasiness through me. “Then I’m sure it will be extremely difficult for you to accept that my answer is no.”
“Why waste time denying what we both already know?”
“Because the last thing we need is to further complicate things.”
“Hate to break it to you, but our relationship is nothing but complicated.”
“No, Declan. Our relationship is nothing but a facade.”
Her words land their blow, and I’m struck speechless as I process her words. She stands and grabs her purse. The small smile she shoots my way feels all kinds of wrong. I don’t want her to leave. That much I know is true, yet she doesn’t seem to acknowledge the silent plea in my eyes.
“I think it’s best if we pretend tonight never happened. For both of our sakes.” She bends down to kiss my cheek, and she might as well have burned the impression of her lips onto my skin. “I’ll meet you in the car. Take your time.”
A tightness in my chest grows with every step she takes away from me. I hate the feeling sprouting inside of me like a weed, tangling around my heart like a vine, almost as much as I hate Iris walking away from me.
Tonight might not have gone like expected, but I am not the kind of man to admit defeat.
I plan. I act. I conquer.
Iris might have rejected my first offer, but I will rise to the challenge and prove just how good things can be between us if she were to give me a chance.
Our marriage might be fake, but these feelings burning inside me are anything but. It’s only a matter of time before I make her mine. She just doesn’t know it yet.
The car isn’t even parked before Iris escapes the garage.
Harrison opens my door with his lips pressed together.
“How long have you been married?” I exit the car and button my jacket.
His head rears back like I have never spoken to him before. We might not be confidants, but he has been my driver since before I ever had a license. Of course I interact with him. He even has my personal number, strictly for coordination purposes.
“Forty years and counting.” He smiles to himself as if the idea pleases him.
“Willingly?”
As opposed to what? A contractual agreement like yours?
He laughs. “She might say no if you asked her.”
My head tilts. “Why?”
He looks at me as if he’s questioning my IQ. “Because marriage is hard, and apparently I’m not the easiest person to get along with. Plus, I snore.”
A laugh gets trapped in my throat. “Makes sense.” I turn toward the door, but Harrison’s words stop me.
“Mind if I offer you some advice?”
I sigh and look over at him. “Only if you feel that it’s absolutely crucial.”