Chapter 17
Chapter seventeen
Nash
Addams Family Karaoke Night should come with a warning label. Because this wasn’t karaoke. This was war.
I was starting to get the impression that everything Stephanie’s family touched wasn’t family fun as much as a family competition. Like there was an invisible scoreboard for favourite Addams sibling. Hiram wasn’t even present yet, and they were already out for blood.
Austin whipped up a fantastic assortment of homemade pizzas unlike anything I’d tasted before and had me seriously missing my college metabolism.
Then in my satiated pliability, I was crammed onto a tan plaid couch—I swear it walked off the set of every ‘90s sitcom I watched growing up—right beside Stephanie, who had Gabe and Ivy’s youngest on her lap.
The toddler eyed me with suspicion seeping from her dark almond-shaped eyes.
Eden, I recalled her name was. Given that none of the four kids looked anything like their parents, I bet they were adopted.
Hailey wedged in on Stephanie’s other side and was more than happy to spill all the details about her cousin, much to Stephanie’s horror.
Hailey Bishop was a valuable ally in the venerable lions’ den.
We chatted briefly about her music—of which I was a huge fan—and I got a sneak-peek hint at her new release coming in the new year.
She hadn’t earned the title of America’s Country Sweetheart for nothing.
Nana—or Charmain, I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to call her—stood in front of the living room television, clipboard in hand. Fingers to her lips, she gave a shrill whistle, and the cacophony died down. So that’s where Gabe got it from.
I’d gotten a quick head count over dinner and there were twenty-five Addams relations in this palatial mansion. Noise just came with the territory.
Nana squared her shoulders and surveyed the room, like a general assessing her troops.
“Everyone ready? Rules are the same as usual. The team divisions are known only by the judge”—she grinned ferally—“that would be me. Each performance will be voted on by the audience, so keep your score cards handy. At the end, the performance totals will be tallied, and the team with the highest score wins.”
I leaned into Stephanie. “This is blind karaoke?”
Eden’s elbow dug into my gut as she rearranged herself to recline more comfortably against Stephanie. Cute kid.
Stephanie’s lips pinched. “We’re Addamses. Did you expect anything different?”
I chuckled softly. “Ryan would love this, and Emmett would hate it. I might borrow this for a payback plan.”
“If you do, invite me because I’d pay to see Emmett do karaoke.”
“First performance!” Nana announced, then her eyes homed in on me like a heat-seeking missile. “Stephanie and Nash!”
Murmurs slithered around the room as Stephanie shifted Eden onto Hailey’s lap and stood up. Reaching out a hand, she tugged me up after her, leaning against me for a brief moment to catch her balance. “Let the initiation begin,” she whispered.
I kept hold of her hand as she led me to the front of the room.
Was I going to humiliate myself? Very likely.
But I could see the spark of determination in Stephanie’s eyes.
As much as her family dynamics wore on her, she was still trying to enter the spirit of the occasion.
And I wasn’t about to let her down. Although…
“Is now a bad time to mention I can’t carry a tune?” I murmured in her ear as we took the proffered mics from Nana.
Stephanie tossed me a cheeky smile. “Everyone needs a handicap. Levels the field.”
I could get addicted to her smile. When I caught Gabe’s stare, I refocused on the task at hand instead of daydreaming about his sister, which I was certain he wouldn’t appreciate.
“Do we pick the song?” I asked Stephanie.
She bit her lip, trying to hold back a laugh. “That would be too easy.”
“I’m beginning to realize your family loves torture as much as your namesakes,” I grumbled, waiting for the television screen to roll the words. Then I panicked. “Wait, we do get the word prompts, right?”
“We’re competitive, not sadistic, Nash.” That wasn’t an affirmative. But the cue words popped up on the screen, a dark green background with a Christmassy border. How festive. When the music started, I easily picked out the tune of Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You.”
Hailey moaned from the front row and covered her ears. Clearly not a Mariah fan since I hadn’t even opened my mouth yet. But Eden laughed in Hailey’s lap, bouncing to the beat.
Tough crowd.
Stephanie swayed rhythmically to the music and began to sing.
Her voice was soft and soothing. Not cultured like Hailey’s but breezy and light.
I was so busy watching her, I nearly missed my cue, and it probably would have been a good thing because the minute I opened my mouth, a muffled snort erupted from the audience—my money was on Gabe since he was recording my public humiliation.
Stephanie didn’t miss a beat, but as she met my gaze, the mirth danced in her eyes.
I could make a joyful noise unto the Lord all right because no one was mistaking what came out of my mouth for music.
Did that stop me from belting out the bridge like I was Mariah herself?
Absolutely not. I clutched my pearls to make a Southern grandma proud and let the music pound out of me.
Halfway through, Stephanie stopped singing, doubled over at the waist with laughter. I wasn’t used to being the brunt of the joke—that was more Ryan’s style—but I loved her laugh. And if horrible karaoke was the way to coax that rare sound out… bring it on.
We finished the last verse strong, hitting our stride. But at the final chorus, Stephanie’s face paled, and the words died on her lips.
The unnatural ashen shade of her skin made me quickly step towards her, gripping her arm.
Was this another POTS attack? I had done some reading after she had told me about it the night of the office party—in between researching the pros and cons of fake dating—and I racked my brain trying to figure out if karaoke was somehow a trigger.
Lack of oxygen caused dizziness, but did it lower blood pressure?
I’d seen her take her meds in the car, but did she need more? The music cut out.
“What a mercy,” Veronica muttered. “I think my ears are bleeding.”
A single clap of applause came from the back of the room.
That’s when I focused on my surroundings. And I saw exactly why Stephanie suddenly resembled a sickly Victorian child in need of a seaside vacation.
Hiram Addams was in the house.