Chapter 12
Rhonan
Spaghetti Confessions & Rock Painting
“I’ve gotta say, Laney…you’ve downright perfected your mother’s spaghetti recipe.” My dad wipes his chin with his napkin before leaning back in his chair, patting his stomach.
Fletcher lifts his water glass toward his mouth before taking a sip. “I agree, George. Every time she makes it, I feel like a teenager all over again.”
Ellis pulls on my shirt sleeve. “When will I be a teenager?”
“Not for a very long time,” I reply.
My dad chuckles. “It will happen before you know it, son. Trust me. You and your sister grew up way too fast for my liking.” He glances over at my sister. “And now my baby girl is getting married.”
Laney tilts her head at him. “Oh, Dad. Don’t start getting emotional already.”
Our father clears his throat. “I just wish your mother was here to see this. She’d be so happy for you and Fletcher.”
Fletcher kisses my sister’s temple. “That means a lot, George. And I know Elizabeth will be there the day of.”
“But Nana is an angel,” Ellis chimes in.
Laney leans closer to her from her chair. “She is, just like your mom. Angels can go anywhere, though. That’s how we know they’re always with us.”
Ellis furrows her brow. “Does that mean my mom can go to school with me?”
I decide to shut down this conversation before I get calls from the school, or better yet, Vienna has to talk to me about another incident in Ellis’s class. “No, baby. Angels just show up for the important stuff, like birthdays, holidays, and weddings.”
Ellis’s shoulders drop. “Oh. Okay. Can I go play now?”
I glance around the table and notice that we’ve all finished eating, so I give her permission to leave. “Sure.” Ellis races toward the living room as I meet my sister’s gaze. “Let’s cool it with the angel talk, shall we?”
“What? Do you not want Ellis to believe that her mom is always with her? She’s way more perceptive than you think.”
“She’s five, Laney. She’s not old enough to understand the complexity of what you’re telling her.”
My sister props her chin in her hand. “Maybe, but she is old enough to notice that you smile when your neighbor is around.”
Her words make my pulse spike. “What?”
She lifts her wine glass to her mouth now, taking a sip. “Yeah. While she was helping me make dinner, she told me all about Vienna and how she makes you smile.”
Fletcher chuckles, his arm still wrapped around my sister’s waist from his seat. “That little girl is aware of more than you think and doesn’t forget things easily.”
I glare in his direction. “Trust me, she still tells me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up. Thanks again for that.”
My father hums. “What are you talking about? A stripper?”
Fletcher pushes a hand through his hair. “It’s a long story.”
Laney pats him on the shoulder. “Why don’t you go tell him about it while you two clean up the kitchen, so I can talk to my brother in private?”
“Yes ma’am,” Fletcher says, kissing my sister chastely before standing. “Come on, George. Let me tell you why I’m not allowed to talk to Ellis by myself anymore.”
Laney watches the two of them walk toward the kitchen before she turns back to me, arching a brow.
“What?”
“You’re grumpier than normal.”
“Your point?”
“It wouldn’t have anything to do with Vienna, would it?”
I lean back in my chair, crossing my arms over my chest. “What are you trying to ask me, Laney?”
“How are things going with you two? Any exciting incidents I should know about?”
I eye her skeptically. “No…”
“Nothing that involves fixing a showerhead? Or seeing her naked?” There’s a curl to her lips that tells me she is leading me into a trap, but I’m not in the mood to play this game.
“I think that’s an inappropriate question to ask your brother.”
“I don’t, especially because I’m only trying to help you here.”
“I don’t need your help, Laney.”
Her face softens and then she reaches out, curling her hand around my forearm. “Rhonan. It’s just me. Tell me what’s going through that head of yours.”
Clenching my teeth together, I attempt to stay strong. “Why?”
“Because fixing your neighbor’s shower and letting Ellis play with her dog isn’t staying away from the woman you had a connection with at a bar before she ghosted you. It actually sounds a lot like the opposite of that.”
My face falls flat. “How’d you know…”
Laney releases my arm and leans back in her chair, grabbing her wine glass again. “Vienna came into the salon this week for a haircut and color, and I sort of pulled it out of her.”
I sigh. “You know, I’m just trying to be polite.”
“You sure that’s all it is?” She tilts her head at me again.
“What do you want me to say, Laney?”
“How about that you’re still attracted to this woman, for starters?”
I toss my hands in the air. “Fine. I am! You happy?”
“Somewhat. Now, what’s going through your head?”
I blow out a breath and pinch the bridge of my nose. “I hate this entire situation.”
“Why?”
“Because I let myself get caught up in a woman, and now it’s like my choice came back to bite me in the ass.”
My sister laughs. “Wow. Ever the pessimist, aren’t you?”
“And how am I supposed to be an optimist in this predicament?”
She reaches for my hand, and I let her, her thumb rubbing over the top of it slowly. “Did you ever stop to think that maybe this all happened for a reason?”
“You know I don’t believe in that shit.”
When you lose your mom and your wife, it’s kind of hard to think that those things were meant to happen.
Why on earth should any human have to go through that kind of loss so early in life?
Why should any young girl have to grow up without her mother?
Why did my mother have to die way too fucking young?
“I know you can be jaded about certain things, Rhonan. Trust me, I’ve had my moments of feeling like that too. But I want to see you move on and stop wasting your life.”
“I’m fine. You have your own things to worry about, so stop meddling in mine.”
“Forgive me for wanting you to be happy.”
“I am happy.”
“Could have fooled me with all the joy spewing from your pores right now.” I roll my eyes, but my sister continues. “Don’t you want someone to share your life with, Rhonan?”
“I had that, Laney…and lost it.”
My sister grows quiet, but she finally says something I didn’t want to hear, but probably needed to. “I think it’s unrealistic to think you wouldn’t develop feelings for someone new at some point, Rhonan. Sarah would have wanted you to move on. She wouldn’t want you and Ellis to be alone forever.”
I swallow down the lump forming in my throat the longer this conversation goes on. “We’re not alone. We have Joanne. We have you, and dad.”
She squints at me. “You know what I mean.”
A heavy sigh leaves my lips, and then I’m burying my head in my hands. “Fuck.”
“Talk to me, Rhonan.” She rubs my shoulder as I stay hunched over. “It’s me. I’m not here to judge. I truly just want what’s best for you.”
“I’m fucking scared, Laney,” I say, my voice low.
“Good.”
My head pops up. “Good?”
“Yes. At least you’re feeling something.”
“Trust me, I wish I wasn’t.”
“Do you know how scared I was to get hurt again with Fletcher? So scared that I wasted ten years hating the man so he’d keep his distance.”
“That’s different.”
“No, it’s not. It’s still fear, and right now, you’re letting it run the show. Besides, if it makes you feel any better, I’m pretty sure Vienna is just as conflicted as you.”
That makes me sit upright again. “What makes you say that?”
My sister shrugs. “She kept trying to assure me that you two are just neighbors, but I could see something in her eyes when she spoke about you…and Ellis.”
“Ellis really loves her.”
“And don’t you think that’s a good sign? You and I both know you wouldn’t date someone without thinking of Ellis first.”
“I never have.”
She points a finger at me. “Exactly. You haven’t dated anyone since Sarah. I’m not saying marry Vienna tomorrow, Rhonan. But she’s the first woman who has elicited a reaction from you since you lost Sarah, and I think you owe it to yourself to at least explore that.”
Hearing my sister tell me something I already know doesn’t help this war I’m fighting within. My attraction toward Vienna is overwhelming, but is that all it is? Or is Laney right, and I’m just too fucking scared to figure out if there’s more between us?
“Daddy?” Ellis comes over to me, rubbing her eyes. “Can I watch a movie?”
Checking the time on my watch, I notice it’s already after seven o’clock. “It’s too late, Ellis. We’re gonna leave soon.”
“No,” she whines. “I want to stay.”
“You can come over and watch a movie with me and Uncle Fletcher soon, okay?” my sister chimes in.
Ellis’s eyes widen. “Can we eat lots of cavities?”
Laney bops her on the nose. “Yes. And we can have you practice throwing the flower petals for the wedding.”
My daughter bounces up and down, her exhaustion from before melting away. “Yes!”
Laney glances up at me. “By the way, I invited Vienna to the wedding.”
“What?” I bark out, but Ellis squeals, clapping her hands.
“Ms. Lewis is coming to the wedding?”
“That’s right,” Laney says with a grin.
“She’ll get to see me in my princess dress then!”
“She will, which means we have to practice a lot so everything is perfect.” My sister’s eyes meet mine.
“You might even have to spend the night. That way, your dad can hang out with a friend if he wants.” Her tone is so suggestive that I’m surprised she was able to say those words with a straight face.
“Subtle,” I mutter.
Laney arches a brow at me. “I try.”
Yeah, her suggestion was the opposite of subtle, but I can’t deny that she’s got me thinking—not that I haven’t already been doing that. There are only a few things that occupy my mind most days—my daughter, my job, my family, and now my sexy neighbor.
Vienna has slowly slipped her way into my world, and I can’t deny that a part of me likes it.