Chapter 35
I lie in bed staring at the ceiling, wondering what Wade’s doing right now. He was so angry when he left here, and I have no doubt in my mind that the Carson brothers will be dragging Caleb to Hell for what he did.
I check my phone for a reply from Maisie.
Dad told me she rushed out of here earlier because she was unwell and it’s unlike her not to have gotten back to me.
I tried calling but she’s not picking up either, and despite it being real late, I’m tempted to get out of bed and drive over to the Carson ranch to see what’s going on.
I hear a loud tap at my window and breathe a sigh of relief when I lift the blind and see Wade on the other side of the glass.
“I’ve been so worried. What happened? Is Maisie okay? Dad said she was sick. Did you tell your brothers about Caleb?” I’m fully aware that I’m bombarding him with questions, but I’ve been kept in the dark for far too long. These past hours have felt like days.
“Maisie’s fine.” I can tell by the distant look in his eyes that something’s wrong. Taking my arms in his hands he steers me back toward my bed, forcing me to sit before dropping onto his knees in front of me.
“Caleb wasn’t the father of Bree’s kid,” he tells me, and when I look back at him he starts to explain.
“He had a thing for her, but he wasn’t the cause of her problem.”
“Then who was?” I ask, feeling so confused. I saw the picture he carried in his wallet, for myself. I can’t have gotten this wrong.
“We still don’t know that. Maybe we never will.” Wade drops his eyes from mine and I feel his grip on me tense a little tighter.
“Okay, but you can still fix things with my dad, right? Forgive him for what he did with Ronnie Mason?”
Wade looks back at me guiltily and shakes his head.
“I’m sorry, darlin’. I don’t think me and you are gonna work out.” I laugh, because I can’t have heard him right. Wade fought so hard for this, I haven’t just imagined what we have between us. It’s real.
“I ain’t boyfriend material. I’ll only break ya heart.” He closes his eyes and something inside me senses he doesn’t mean the words he’s saying.
“You don’t mean that.” I grip at him desperately, and when he stares back at me, his eyes seem blank. “You know me, Leia, I’ve been doin’ this my whole life. We’re better off as we were.”
“Wade!” I stare right back at him, feeling a hollow pit start to form in my chest.
“I’m sorry for makin’ you feel things could be different. I’m sorry for makin’ ya feel, at all.” When his hand lifts up to wipe away my tears, I swipe it away.
“So, what now? We just forget this? Am I supposed to get on with life and marry Caleb because you want to go back to being friends? ”
“No, you shouldn’t marry him. Ya don’t love him,” Wade tells me through tense lips.
“No, I don’t. I love you .” I take his head in my hands and force him to look at me, but he shuts me out again by closing his eyes. “Look at me, listen to what I’m telling you. I love you. ” I repeat the words, hoping they’ll sink in and make him see sense.
“I’m sorry ‘bout that too.” He takes my wrists, forcing my hands away as he stands up, and when he starts making his way toward the window, I rush after him.
“And what about you? Do you really expect things to go back to how they were? I can’t do it. I can’t live in this town and see you every day knowing what we had. It’s cruel.”
“I leave in the mornin’. I called up my old trainer and I’m headin’ for Dallas. There's a competition out there in three weeks’ time. He thinks I can be ready for it.”
I want to hurt him, not just in the way he’s hurting me, but physically. What Wade Carson has done to me is beyond cruel, and when he comes toward me and kisses my lips, I wish I had the strength to stop him.
“I’m so sorry,” he tells me weakly before he leaves me standing, heartbroken, confused, and completely devastated.
* * *
I’m pushing my breakfast around my plate in a daze when I hear my mom’s loud shriek.
“What the hell happened to you?” she asks Caleb, as he steps further into the room and joins us.
“Came to cancel the golf plans with George this afternoon.” He holds up his bandaged hand as Mom quickly gets up to examine the state of his face.
“What happened, will the swelling go down before the wedding?” She sounds concerned.
“Lay off him, dear,” Father speaks up, looking at Caleb suspiciously.
“What happened, son?” he asks, continuing to eat his pancakes while he waits for his answer.
“I got on one of Leonard’s Broncs, it was silly of me. I landed on a fence and had a loose nail go right through.”
He holds up his hand awkwardly, and I know straight away that he’s lying. Wade did this when he thought that Caleb was the person who knocked up Bree. This is my fault and despite the fact Caleb is an asshole, I can’t help feeling bad for it. I could have got the man killed.
“That was a stupid thing to do.” My dad chuckles to himself as he picks up his coffee and takes a sip.
“And the effects, will they be damaging?” he asks, narrowing his eyes onto Caleb and taking a much tenser tone.
“No, sir,” Caleb answers back with a little disdain, making me certain that there is something going on that I don’t know about.
“I’m pleased to hear that.” My father nods his head back at him, and I look between them.
“So, everything’s okay?” Mom looks relieved as she retakes her seat.
“Yeah, everything’s okay.” I reach out my hand and take Caleb’s uninjured one in mine.
It doesn’t matter that I despise him, this right here is evidence of what the Carsons are capable of, and I can’t have my dad be a victim of it.
I have to trust that whoever this Order is, will protect him if we all play our roles.