Chapter Twenty-Four - Teagan
Igrab hold of Sen’s midnight dark hair, arch into the solid heat of his body, and let him part my lips with his tongue. Moaning, I glide my tongue along his, unable to be gentle when I’ve been chasing him since we met.
Sen’s kiss isn’t a slow thing. He devours me whole, and as my fingers twist around his rich locks—demanding he be closer if that were even possible—I kiss him back with the same fervent hunger. Not even caring I’ll never be satiated.
I’m lightheaded, but I don’t dare come up for air. I wonder if this vampire’s bite is as addictive as his kiss.
Sen’s palm glides further up under my T-shirt, palming my torso. I gulp down each of his groans as he explores my sensitive skin, while my other hand grabs hold of his strong shoulder for support, gripping onto his bulging muscles.
When his palms stroke over my nipples, I gasp into him as shivers rake across my every nerve ending.
My dick twitches then—
Like I’ve been shocked by lightning, I push Sen away, sucking down panicked breaths as I stare at his heaving chest.
“Teagan?” Sen pants my name like he’s risen from deep waters.
I shake my head. Shame coils around my insides and squeezes, turning my pleasure into stomach-churning sickness.
“Hey.” Sen takes his hand out of my shirt and strokes my cheek with his other palm. I flinch. He pulls away, but when I shake my head—eyes scrunched—and lean into him, he cups the side of my face again and tucks me safely into his chest. “Teagan, it’s okay. We don’t have to do anything.”
“I…” Tears burn behind my eyes. “I want to. But I…I can’t, okay? I can’t.”
He kisses my temple. Runs the tips of his fingers along my cheeks, painting my skin with the tears I hadn’t noticed leaking.
“Can you explain to me why you can’t?” Sen asks gently, never letting me go.
I wanted to hide this last, shameful secret from Sen. From everyone. The thing my ex-friend Carter did that keeps making me flinch.
“The bullying…”
Sen goes deathly still. Then becomes the predator I know he is when he whispers, “Did they hurt you?”
“Not like that,” I mumble into his neck, softening against his hard chest.
My arms loop around his tapered waist. I touch the skin on his lower back and run my fingers along the ridges of his spine.
“Or I guess…different. The guy who used to be my friend was angry that I slept with his ex. But like, who cares, so had everyone else. But he didn’t like that I had done it.
So he got a friend to pretend he wanted to fuck me.
We went to his room, I took my clothes off and then…
” I shut my eyes and press my nose into the hollow of Sen’s throat.
Breathe in his warmth, his heat, his musk.
“Then a bunch of people ran in and…laughed…at me. Since then, I can’t… I can’t get hard.”
“Sweetheart.” Sen’s solid hold tightens until I struggle to take a full breath. I wish he’d hold me tighter. “I am so sorry that happened.”
“Every time I…try, it’s like I’m taken back to that place. So something I used to love became something I’m ashamed of.”
Sen kisses my temple. “Then we won’t—”
“But I want to!” I groan, dropping my head to the wall with a thud. “Sex is great. Fun. I miss it, miss being close or…” I blink up at him. “Miss getting close to someone.”
His lips pull into a smile; his understanding of me is razor sharp. “Teagan, I’ve had sex with thousands of men.”
“Slut.” My lips twitch.
Sen chuckles, humming in agreement. “Yes, and as one slut to another—”
I grin, the shame dissipating with each smile Sen pulls from me. This is what I missed about sex, not the orgasms, or learning the shape of new bodies, but that sex is just fucking fun.
“ —I can tell you, there are many, many ways to have sex.”
“I know that,” I complain, running my fingers up and down his spine like the keys of a piano. “But I didn’t think I’d be fucking broken at twenty-two.”
“Don’t speak about yourself that way. You are not broken,” he says, carding his fingers into my curls.
“I know… sex isn’t power,” I mumble, turning my face so I can run my tongue along the beating pulse at his wrist. He groans. I do it again, all while looking up at him through my lashes. “But I feel so fucking powerless.”
Sen tilts my face up to his, and like my fingers touch his back, my gaze roams over every inch of his handsome face.
His nose with a crook in it, his firm mouth and sharp jaw.
His eyes that take in the whole of me, accepting my pieces not like I’m broken, but like I’m something he gets to explore and wonder at.
“We can stop anytime—”
“I already said I don’t want to,” I interrupt, pressing my chest into his and wishing we could tear off all our clothes. “I just can’t—”
“Nope,” Sen kisses the top of my nose. “You can say ‘no’, ‘stop’, ‘I don’t like that’. You’re not allowed to say you can’t.”
“Bossy.” I nip his bottom lip. “I kinda like it.”
Sen’s grin slides across his face the same way he learnt the shape of my torso—like he can’t get enough of me. “You like power?”
I shrug. “I said I felt powerless, not that I need it…”
“But you want it?” Sen asks, lowering his face, so the only way he’d be closer is if we were kissing.
I shrug, distracted by the shape of his lips and starving for them.
Sen kisses me, slow but ravenous, then he whispers, the heat of his breath burning my lips, “Do you like your prostate being played with, sweetheart?”
“Yeah.” Whatever shame I was feeling is washed away by the intensity of Sen. “Yeah. I do, slick.”
Sen smirks, the tip of his fang flashing, then he pulls away, his strong muscles and defined chest glistening. “Do you know who I am, Teagan?”
I cock my head to the side.
“I am a nine-hundred-year-old vampire.”
Sen strolls away from me, and I shiver at the loss of his heat. He pulls open a drawer and plucks out a clear bottle of lube.
“I was made into one from ancient blood.” He strolls back, eyes piercing. My breathing slows to a deep, steady inhale and exhale. “And before that, I was a samurai.” Sen towers above me, tall and imposing, his strong body stark in the low light. “Undefeated. Feared.”
My breath catches.
“I am more powerful than you can imagine.” Sen glides to his knees, looks up at me, and I nearly swallow my tongue. “And I am, completely, yours to command.”
My cock doesn’t get hard. But my entire body floods with boiling heat as my pupils dilate, staring down at the vampire before me.
Sen smirks. “So, sweetheart, what would you like me to do?”