Chapter 9
A Caustic Race
Vee’s call only lasted five minutes and they apparently didn’t talk about much; it was just a check in.
Dominik asked if he liked the ship, if he’d used the arcade yet, and if he’d heard from me.
It leads me to realise that I should have faked some calls, a whole slew of angry messages and threats about reporting Dominik to the authorities.
It’s been days of radio silence. He knows me.
He knows I’d never let him do this without putting up a fight.
Unease eats at me. It’d be more suspicious if I suddenly started peppering him now, after days of nothing.
In the end, I’m so overwhelmed that I decide to do nothing and hope Dominik’s arrogant enough to believe I’ve been shocked into non-action.
Tanisira leads me to the airlock in a not-entirely horrible silence.
I expect her to slow her pace or try to support me, maybe, and so I’m relieved when she doesn’t.
It gives me the time I need to decompress, limp or no—because at some point, it came back.
There’s a pressure in my hips, as familiar as it is uncomfortable, accompanied by a slew of burning pains that lick up and down my legs.
I welcome it; combined with thoughts of Dominik, I’m too preoccupied to develop much anxiety about the looming spacewalk.
I grit my teeth and try to sink into the sensations shifting through my creaky body.
It’s a change for me; I usually just ignore them.
The distraction works because when Tanisira helps me into my EVA suit, her energy snappy and efficient, I manage to not shut down again.
There’s so much padding that I can’t even see my tremors.
I plop down on the bench, the sound of my heavy breaths bouncing softly around the helmet.
These things must cost thousands. I make an effort to move with more care.
“This is my first time on a ship,” I blurt.
Tanisira pauses in the process of preparing her suit. “I gathered. Even if you had been on one before, it wouldn’t make a spacewalk any less daunting.” She hesitates. “I wouldn’t inflict this on you if I didn’t need your help.”
“I know.”
It’s kind of her to say and somewhat reassuring: I am not trained for this.
I help her don a suit but she only accepts my assistance out of politeness, I think, because her movements are swift and confident.
She’s certainly done this many times before.
It takes so long to put these things on.
When we’re both ready, she sits beside me without the heavy, breathless noise I had made.
“Half an hour of pure oxygen and then we can go.”
Kit, listening as always, activates the vents in our helmets. “Depressurisation of the airlock beginning now, Captain Tanisira.”
The tang of metal permeates every gulp of air I take. There’s so much ambient noise, but it feels like sitting in silence. I clear my throat and wriggle on the bench, trying to find a sweet spot—the EVA suits are not made for sitting in.
Tanisira’s head swivels. “How are you feeling?”
“Peachy.”
“You said that earlier. I guessed the reference, but what does it mean?”
Despite myself, a smile flashes across my face.
She probably speaks more languages than I do, but I like being able to correct or define things she’s unsure of.
I don’t know why. It’s not something I’ve ever noticed in myself before.
Maybe it’s because she shares her gorgeous language with me so fully, crafting art in ways that I will never be able to.
Her intelligence—her competence—is intimidating. This, at least, I can offer her.
“It means I’m doing great.”
“Hmm.” She nods, looking contemplative. “But sarcastic? At least, the way you say it.”
“I guess so, yeah.”
“Quite a caustic race, Tellurians.”
My snort this time is much louder. “You don’t use sarcasm in Suryavana?”
“I’ve been told we’re a more direct people. I didn’t know it was unusual until I moved to Telluria. Since then, I’ve learned that you rely heavily on sarcasm, passive aggression, and subterfuge.”
I can’t find it in me to dredge up a rebuttal. We are all that, and more, even. “Damn, it must be so nice to have conversations on your planet.”
“Perhaps. It doesn’t bother me so much. It’s the way of a society that has done to each other what you have, generation after generation; it’s offence as defence.”
Sometimes I forget how formal Tanisira’s speech can be, but right now, it’s out in full force.
I know that in Suryavana, the Tellurian they’re taught is formal.
It should be jarring, but I think Tanisira could read an AllPrep manual, and it would sound lovely.
Right now, though, I realise I have an opportunity to pepper her with questions.
The screen on my forearm shows we still have twenty minutes left, and I just can’t help myself.
“How long have you lived on Telluria? Why did you emigrate? Did you know anyone on-planet before you moved?”
“Are we doing Q and A?”
I elbow her playfully, forgetting that I’m essentially a bag of mulch in an expensive suit. I wince at the bolt of stinging heat that races up my arm and into my shoulder. Her eyes sharpen, and she turns to fully face me.
“I’ll answer your questions.”
“Great—”
“But for every answer I give, I get to ask you a question in return.”
My eyebrows lift. Somehow, I wasn’t expecting her to get sly about this.
I flash back to her scepticism about my health.
I know it’s highly likely she’ll ask me again, but I think.
.. I think it might be worth it to find out more about Tanisira.
She’s so buttoned up. Wouldn’t it be interesting to undo a few of those buttons?
“Deal.” I grin.
As surprised as I was, Tanisira’s even more so.
Her iron control slips, eyes widening slightly for a moment, but I catch it before she pulls it back.
Interesting indeed. I’m hit by a flashback of the captain’s lips lowering to mine, her hands on my body.
How would she kiss when she really gets going?
She was soft, and hesitant, but we were interrupted.
Would she let herself go? How quickly would it take her to learn how I like to be touched?
“Marlowe.”
Tanisira’s voice pulls me from my thoughts. Always grateful that my skin is too dark to show my embarrassment, I meet her gaze. It seems she’s been trying to get my attention for some time. She tilts her head, and I muster a smile, gesturing for her to continue.
“Which of the questions do you want me to answer? You can only have one at a time.”
“Oh.” I grin. “None of them. New question: why were you hiding me from the crew?”
Initially, Tanisira said it would take us five days to reach Mars.
With the delays we’ve had so far, the red planet moves a little further away.
We’re four days out, and I still have no idea what Dominik knows, which is too terrifying to contemplate, but the ISA search suggests that Tanisira hasn’t told him about me.
Even though she agreed to help me, I can’t figure out why.
It doesn’t benefit her in any way—in fact, it puts her in harm’s way.
Dominik isn’t technically dangerous, but he is powerful, and he is petty.
Tanisira leans away, putting her back against the bulkhead.
“To give me time to think. I didn’t know what to do with you.
The crew has been with the Midas for much longer than I have, and I was still unsure of loyalties.
I didn’t want to risk anyone informing Gryphon before I knew what I was going to do. ”
I was expecting something ominous, but that’s a pretty good reason.
And I must be emoting heavily because a crease appears between Tanisira’s eyebrows as she watches me.
Tensing, I prepare myself for her question.
It’s stupid, insane even, but I find that I don’t want to lie to her.
Damn it, the Suryavans are refreshing. Then again, maybe Tanisira’s just an individual who prefers candour.
“What happened with you and Gryphon that led you to sneak onto the ship?”
I blink. Blink again. “You mean aside from the fact that he abducted his own child?”
Her tone is dry. “Aside from that.”
My muscles unlock. I’ve told Tanisira the truth in bits and bobs and this whole situation must be a jumble from where she stands, looking in.
“Dominik has always been possessive. He doesn’t like to share; maybe he just got fed up with having to.
His PA told me she had orders to bring Vee to the hangar, that his name was on the passenger manifest. She wouldn’t disobey Dominik, but she wanted me to get there before it was too late.
Fast forward to me faceplanting in front of you. ”
I bare my teeth in something like a smile. The memory is still embarrassing, though I like to think I’ve been proving my mettle since then. Somewhat.
“Why didn’t you call the authorities?”
Irritation darts through me, for the briefest moment, before I acknowledge that there’s no colour in Tanisira’s voice or expression.
She’s simply curious. Logically, calling the police was the next step, whether I trust them or not.
I could pull her up for asking me a second question, but I decide not to.
“I don’t trust the police—the carceral model is cruel and counterproductive—and I know what Dominik’s money can buy. I had no other choice.”
Tanisira looks more thoughtful than judgmental. “You weren’t expecting to take off with us.” It’s not a question—smart woman.
“I wasn’t. That reminds me, I need my things back.”
“They’re in your cabin.”
Ah, the cabin I have yet to explore. I’ll have to check later and reach out to people before they start making missing posters.
“Why is yours so empty?” I ask.
“I don’t understand the question.”
“When I first woke up, I thought I was in an unoccupied room. You have no belongings.”
Tanisira hums. “I have a plant, actually.”