Chapter 31 #2
He buried his face in his hands—anything to block out Cora’s upturned, pale face and wide, disappointed eyes. The rest of the story leaked across his lips.
Silence fell after he finished. His horse whinnied from the stable beneath them. He needed to finish this and head to town by nightfall. Before Cora’s disappointment and loss of respect for him cut him to the core.
She touched his knee. “But you couldn’t have known about the pond, Ben. It was dark. You’d never been to the area. You didn’t even—”
“I should have known or put someone in charge who did. It was my operation, my responsibility. I’m the one who made the decision to drive the cattle to market without waiting on Goodnight.”
“You were only trying to do what was best for us.”
He raised his head. “I’ll make this right. I’ll be on the stage at the end of the week. It might take two months before I have a good sum of money back here, but you can sell off a few of the cattle at the stockyard, or use the money Goodnight—”
“I don’t want you to go.” Moisture dampened her eyes. Her slender fingers wrapped around his weathered ones, her gaze so bright it took his breath away. “We’ll get through this somehow. Here. Together.”
“Together.” He sank back against the wall.
His eyes stung. She would stand by him? Despite everything?
He squeezed his eyes shut and sucked in a quick breath, fighting against the surge of hope threatening to explode within him.
“You don’t understand. I’m broke. Except for what I got for the sale of a heifer to the stockyard owner.
And most of that is owed to Miller, except for what I’m saving for traveling back East. I came to Texas with my early inheritance determined to set you up fine… and I’ve blown it all.”
“You own half a ranch. Good land with lots of potential.”
“I’m not claiming your ranch, Cora. And it takes money and cattle to run a ranch. I’m not going to have you and Charlie just scraping by. I’m going to provide for you the best way I know how. As an ed—”
“I’m not letting you go.” She released his hands and pressed her palms to his thighs, raising her gaze to his. “Families stick together. Mine never fully did.” Her eyes glistened with the most beautiful gift anyone had ever given him. Her trust. And her love.
He slid his hand along her jawline. “I don’t deserve such grace.”
Her voice turned silken. “And I don’t deserve the overwhelming generosity you’ve shown me since the day you first set foot on the ranch.”
He leaned forward, skimming his hands over her hair and down her back, drawing her closer. He dipped his forehead to hers. Warmth flooded through him. Hope. Love. “You’re not going to allow me to give up, are you?” His voice more of a breath than a whisper.
“Absolutely not.” She slid her hands over his chest and shoulders in a caress that sent his heart skipping like a stone across water. Her fingers curled around the back of his neck.
“I’m sorry I assumed the worst and lost my temper at the café, Cora.”
Her lashes fluttered against his nose. “You’re the one and only man who has my heart.” She lifted her gaze, cornflower blue calling to him.
His lips found hers in a kiss that obliterated the disappointment and doom, and any thought of a stagecoach and the road east. He pulled her onto his lap and wrapped her in his embrace, moving his hands up and down her sides and across her back, losing himself in kisses...
A knock. Ben raised his head. Cora stirred from her cuddled position on his lap. Shadows had fallen across the room, but he’d been in no mood to release his girl from his hold. Had they sat like that for an hour or more?
“Charlie’s probably wondering what happened to us.” Cora touched her hair, which now cascaded down her back.
Should they act as if they’d only been talking?
Cora edged off his lap, and he rose beside her, his legs numb from her weight, and his other muscles aching from LeBeau’s blows. “Come in.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and drew her to his side. The boy might as well see the truth.
Shirt untucked and his arm in the sling close to his body, Charlie halted on the threshold and studied them. “Are you two going to get married?”
Ben half laughed. “We’re thinking on it.”
Cora blushed.
“Good.” Charlie skipped over. “I want to show you the whistle I bought.” He dug the wooden object out of his pocket. “And I’m wondering when we’re going to eat.”
Cora smiled. “I’m going to get right on dinner. You stay here and visit with Ben.”
Marry Cora. It was what he wanted more than anything in the world. But what was he to do about his promise to his father?
He had no answers to that, but he knew what he would do with the small medicine bottle in the pocket of his dirty trousers on the floor.
An hour later, with Charlie in the house washing up and preparing to eat, Ben quickstepped to the outhouse.
As the door clunked shut behind him, he dug the bottle out of his pocket, opened the lid, and poured the contents into the hole, careful not to allow a single drop to touch his skin.
The odor was bad enough. Made his head swim.
But he would not disrespect Cora’s gift of trust and respect.
With the force of David slinging the rock toward Goliath, Ben hurtled the bottle and lid into the mire of waste.
Lord, I give this craving to You. You can do what I cannot do alone. Let me be worthy of her love.