18
Zander
Barefoot and Masked
I WOKE TO SOMEONE SCREAMING.
The noise cut straight into my nightmares and yanked me from sleep so fast, my heart palpitated. Vertigo scrambled my eyesight as I got up too quick, sending me swaying sideways. I bashed my toe on the end of the bed as I bolted to my window.
Sailor!
Another scream. Her horror floated easily between our two houses, thanks to our open windows.
I didn’t think.
Hauling on a pair of black tracksuit bottoms and fighting my way into a black t-shirt, I bolted down the stairs. Skidding through my conservatory, I went to fly off the deck, but common sense had me sprinting back into the house and snatching my motorcycle scarf and hat.
Yanking the balaclava over my head, I jammed my hat into place and brought the scarf as high as it would go to just below my eyes. My vision was fuzzy without my glasses, but not so bad that I couldn’t beat the shit out of whoever was hurting Sailor.
Prying the palings apart, I fought my way through the fence. The loose screw snagged my t-shirt as I wriggled into her back garden. Barefoot and absolutely panicking, I charged onto her back deck and tried the door handle.
Locked.
Fuck.
Hurry.
Hurry!
Ducking to one knee, I found the lavender pot where Melody always kept the spare key. Shoving it into the lock, I swung the door open.
Moans and thrashing came from the living room.
My hands curled into fists. All my training as a doctor switched from saving a life to taking one. I knew what artery bled the most. I knew what bone to snap to cause the most pain.
He’s dead.
Skidding into the living room, I flicked on the light, then snapped it off again.
Shit.
Shit!
This is bad.
So bad.
So very, very bad.
Sailor woke up, thanks to me blinding her with the overhead light. It took a second for her brain to work and another second to drink me in. Sweat glittered on her temples, her phone beside her where she’d fallen asleep, her legs tangled in the blanket I’d given her when she’d slept outside.
Our eyes met, and for a second, she didn’t react.
And then, she exploded into action.
“No. Don’t. Help !” Scrambling to the opposite end of the couch, she hunched into a ball and went to scream again.
I did the only logical thing I could do.
Throwing myself over the arm of the couch, I landed beside her and slapped my hand over her lips. With my other hand, I reached behind her and turned off the side lamp, suffocating the room in darkness.
Everything Colin had said echoed in my head.
The Clark Kent effect. The fact my face and hair were hidden but my bright green eyes were not. I had to stay in the dark. I had to act different, speak different. If I wanted any chance of her not recognising me, I needed the night to be my ally.
Squirming beneath my gag, her eyes bugged with terror. Her nails scratched at my wrist, leaving me with welts I would never be able to explain in the morning.
“It’s me,” I growled, keeping my voice as gravelly as I could, grateful I still had sleep tangled around my voice box. “It’s—” Do not say your real name . “X.” Backing away, I curled my fingers around her cheek. “I’ll let you go, but you can’t scream, alright? I don’t think you want the police here, thanks to a nosy neighbour calling, do you?”
Never looking away from me, her face obscured by shadows, she nodded once.
Trusting her with my life—literally—I slowly pulled my palm away and moved to the opposite end of the sofa. Perching on the end, I kept as much distance between us as possible. Raising my hands, I made a show of surrendering before clasping them together between my spread legs.
She didn’t say a word, watching me with an intensity that made me itch. “W-What are you doing here?” She touched her lips, rubbing where I’d touched her. “How did you get in?”
And this was the moment where I should come clean. I should give the truth instead of walking a bridge made of lies. It wasn’t a bridge—it was a crocodile-filled chasm with the thinnest, breakable tightrope keeping me afloat.
One wrong answer and I’d destroy my career, her sanity, and whatever relationship we’d had over the years.
Clearing my throat and deliberately making my voice extra low, I said, “I know where you keep the spare key.”
She frowned. “You know from watching me?”
“Yes.” I rushed to add, “But don’t change the location just because I know. It’s handy for emergencies.”
“And you thought barging into my house at two in the morning was an emergency?”
I scowled, focusing on the bruises still framing her black eye. “You were screaming.”
“No, I—” She went to argue but then sucked in a breath. “Wait. I was?”
I almost said ‘it woke me up’ but that would be a sure clue to who I was. Thinking on my feet, cursing my exhausted brain, I lied, “I was walking past. I heard you.”
She scoffed. “Yeah, okay.” Sitting taller, she curled her bruise-mottled legs beneath her as she turned to face me. “You just happened to be strolling around the streets at this time.” Leaning forward, she studied me. “Try again. No lies, remember?”
Nervousness had my fingers touching my mask, making sure it was still in place. I tugged my hat extra low, dropping my stare, hoping she couldn’t see a damn thing in the dark.
Fucking hell.
I needed to figure out a way to get out of here before she saw right through me.
“I, eh…” I gulped. I wasn’t cut out for this. I wasn’t good at deception. I’d always cracked under pressure if Gran ever asked if I did something wrong. Most of the time, I confessed to all kinds of misdeeds, even if it was my two sisters’ fault, just because I couldn’t handle interrogation.
Panic fisted my heart; the truth burned my tongue.
I tugged the bottom of my scarf, a second away from yanking it off and telling her everything. Wouldn’t it be better to tell her now? Before we got even deeper into whatever this was?
Had she felt the same tingly rush when I’d admitted I had a crush on her? Just the act of writing it down, after decades of denying it, had made it far too real. It fucking hurt to think of ruining that feeling, thanks to lies and deception.
You’re the reason she’s black and blue, remember? He beat her because of you.
“Do you want help removing that?” She raised an eyebrow at where I fiddled with my balaclava. “Why are you hiding? Does it really matter if I see your face?”
Removing my hands, words I hadn’t even thought of spilled free. “I promised you the ability to share everything to a faceless stranger.” I shrugged. “This is me faceless. I’ll keep it on.”
“And if I want you to lose the hat and mask?”
“Then I’ll leave and message you later.” I stood, noticing I was barefoot.
Fuck, how could I explain that?
Not only was I out for a walk at two in the morning but without shoes?
Goddammit.
Rolling my shoulders, I waited for her to figure out that my bedroom was one fence over and put a restraining order on me.
Turning to go, I muttered, “Now I know you’re not in danger, I’m leaving.”
Swooping to her feet, she said, “How do you know I’m not in danger?”
I glanced at her, making sure to keep my face shaded with the peak of my cap. “Like I said, I heard you screaming. I thought someone was murdering you. But it was just a nightmare. You should go to bed, Lori. And I do mean a bed. Don’t sleep on the couch.”
She hugged herself as if I’d said something wrong. “Y-You called me Lori.”
I froze.
Had I slipped already?
Did X know that name or Zander?
She messaged you as X, you dumbass.
Breathing hard, I tried to get my anxiety under control. This was literally the worst thing I’d ever done, and I’d already burned through enough luck not being recognised.
“I have to go.” I stepped toward the kitchen.
“Wait.” She swayed toward me as her hand came up.
I stiffened. The nurturing aspect of my soul that got me into far too much strife reacted instantly. Shifting back to her, I almost— almost touched her again. My fingers burned to cup her elbow or grab her hand. To offer support and contact.
It took all my willpower to stay where I was.
Her gaze slid over me, taking in my black attire. Her eyes widened, fear glossing her stare.
The tops of my bare toes stung as she glared at them.
“Don’t ask,” I growled, adding more rocks to my voice. “I can’t answer, and I don’t want to lie.”
Her eyebrows pinched together, but slowly, she nodded. “I wasn’t looking at your feet, actually. I…” She swallowed hard and balled her hands. “I was looking at the carpet where you’re standing.”
My heart thundered against my ribs. My gaze dropped to the spot between the couch and the coffee table. Her little inhale of pain told me all I needed to know.
I didn’t have to focus on changing my voice to a growl, it happened naturally. All those aggressive, possessive instincts that I’d always buried roared through me. “This is where he tried to kill you.”
She flinched and rubbed her bare arms.
Her dress floated around her legs with soft grey and pink layers. The sleeveless bodice twinkled in the night with pink and silver threads in the shape of falling flower petals. Her sandy blonde hair floated around her shoulders in messy, sleepy curls, and the night softened her features until she looked like a dream.
A dream where I’d wake up any moment and she’d be gone.
A single tear glimmered in the dark, rolling to her chin.
And I didn’t think.
Striding into her, I snatched her around her nape and waist and pressed her hard against me. The second her body collided with mine, I saw literal fucking stars.
Every synapse arrowed in on her. Every breath. Every heartbeat. I’d never felt anything like it with anyone. She felt so right. She fit so perfectly.
She struggled a little, and rationality tore through my mistake.
“Shit, I’m sorry.” Untangling my hand in her hair at her nape, I gently pushed her away. “I didn’t mean. I wasn’t going to—”
With a soft cry, she threw herself against my chest. Her arms looped around my waist as she buried her face into my t-shirt.
I didn’t move for a second.
I couldn’t.
And then, chemical reaction overrode common sense. I enveloped her in the tightest hug I’d ever given. My fingers wove through her hair as I pressed her cheek to my heart. My spine curled to curve around her, sheltering her the best I could, all while my other arm fit snugly around her waist, pinning her in place.
She shuddered a little as if silently crying, but she didn’t push me away. Didn’t ask me to release her. We stood there, on the spot where she’d almost died, and didn’t say a word.
My eyes closed as I rested my chin on the top of her head.
My heartbeat grew thick and loud, pounding through me.
I lost track of time. I didn’t care how many minutes or hours passed. I had her in my arms. She was safe in my protection. I never wanted to let her go.
A shimmer of light danced on my peripheral as if someone’s shadow passed by in the corridor. The old box TV suddenly turned on, spewing snow and hissing loudly.
Sailor jumped out of my embrace, pressing a hand to her chest. “Oh my God.”
Snatching the remote off the coffee table, I turned it off. Partly because the noise was awful but also the light would be my downfall.
She blinked as I tossed the remote onto the couch and shifted toward the dining room. “I better go.”
“You probably should. This house is haunted.”
“Excuse me?”
She smiled. “By my nana. I think it was her who turned on the TV. Probably doesn’t approve of me hugging a skull-masked stranger in the dead of night.”
“She’s wise, and you should probably follow her suggestion.” I backed up slowly. “I hope I didn’t scare you. That wasn’t my intention when coming in here. I promise I won’t—”
“I won’t move the key.” She dropped her eyes as if embarrassed. “I might second-guess this in the morning, but…I’m glad you were able to get in. You stopped a particularly awful nightmare.” She shuddered as she looked at the carpet again. “I should know better than to fall asleep in here. It’s where the memories are the worst.”
My gaze dropped to the floor. “Are you sure you want to stay here? Maybe a change of scenery would—”
“Don’t you start.” All softness bled from her tone. Crossing her arms, she stood straight and brave. “I’m not letting him chase me out of my home. I’m happy here. Or at least I was. And I’ll remember how to be again. Besides—” she shrugged “—there’s a ghost looking over me. I’ll be okay.”
“And there’s a stranger on the other end of a text message too.” I smiled, not that she’d see it behind my mask. “Anytime.”
“But you won’t let me see your face?”
I shook my head with a sigh. “No, I won’t.”
“Ever?”
A prickle of despair worked its way down my spine. “One day, you’ll know.”
“You sound as if that will be a bad thing.”
Bowing slightly, I ignored her fishing comment. “Goodnight, Lori.”
She sucked in a breath. “I don’t know why hearing you call me Lori makes my heart skip.”
I stiffened. I’d grown used to her honesty on a screen, but to have it in person?
Shit, this couldn’t be any worse for me.
I’d never cared for the games girls played. The secrets and flirting—saying one thing and meaning another. It was partly why I didn’t date—that and my brutal work hours. I wanted straightforward and simple. If I pissed someone off, I’d rather know than be told otherwise. If I impressed her or made her happy, I’d like to see her reaction rather than her hiding it from me, thinking it made her weak.
Reaching for my glasses to nudge them up my nose, my hand stilled as I remembered… I’m not wearing any.
Colin’s warning came back to mind that fiddling with my glasses was one of my biggest tells. I would have to be careful the next time I saw her.
Fuck, next time?
You barely coped this time.
Slowly dropping my arm, I whispered, “Go to bed. I’ll message you in the morning.”
Hugging herself, she held my stare for a long moment before smiling slightly. “Thank you, X. Thank you for not judging or pitying me.”
“Always.”
I slipped out the door, locked it, put the key back, then walked in the opposite direction to home, just in case she was watching out the window.