Chapter 23 #3
He grabs my ass, massaging it. “It’s a fucking good thing. Thick and beautiful.”
“Oh—God.”
“Take me home, baby. Fuck yourself on my dick.”
He stops moving. I push back against him, then fall forward, trusting him to catch me. Then I push back again. I can feel how close he is by how tense his body is. I keep going, twisting to look at him. He’s staring at me like I’m a masterpiece.
When I see his face change to one of complete release, my orgasm grips me. I gasp, taken by surprise. I didn’t think I was going to come. I thought this was just for him. But now I’m clenching around his cock, my legs turning to Jell-O, toes curling in the grass.
He collapses forward, wrapping his arm around me, massaging my tits as he empties himself inside me. I forgot! It’s too late to tell him to do it somewhere else. And as the aftershocks of the orgasm tremble through me, I realize I don’t even care.
“Stay with me tonight,” he whispers in my ear, kissing my neck.
“That’s risky. If Sylvie sees…”
“Stay with me,” he says again. “I’ll set an alarm for an hour or two before she gets up. But stay with me. Don’t make me ask again.”
“Maybe I want to hear you beg,” I whisper, shifting against him, his wilting cock still inside of me.
“You’re the only person in the world who could make me beg, Mara,” he says huskily. “Please stay with me. Only me. Just me.”
We dress again. When he sees me walking awkwardly, he laughs knowingly and scoops me into his arms. He carries me through the house.
It’s risky, but it’s so comfortable being in his strong arms. He carries me into his bedroom and lays me down, then climbs into bed next to me and pulls me in for a hug.
As I place my head against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat, I think I finally fully understand what he means by walking the line between light and dark.
I fall into a deep sleep almost instantly, eyes falling heavily shut, lost in the sweetness of this moment.
I know things are still going to be complicated, that it can never be simple when a woman without a home finds her place with a man forced to do bad things…
for good reasons. But I can’t fixate on any of that.
Not now. It’s just us. It’s just this warmth.
The alarm doesn’t wake me. I wake gently, realizing I’m in Ettore’s arms. “Where are we?” I murmur.
“I’m carrying you to your room,” he says softly, kissing me on the cheek.
I cuddle closer to him, falling back to sleep. When I wake again, I’m alone in bed, early morning sunlight filtering through my window. I check my phone and realize I don’t have to get up for several minutes.
Ettore has texted me.
Ettore: Last night was amazing. Not just the sex. Everything. I’ve been trying to hold myself back, physically, emotionally, but I think we could be something, Mara.
Emotion surges up inside me. I think that too. Of course I do. But I also have to be realistic. I have to understand that passion and tension and white-hot need aren’t always enough to fuel a relationship.
Mara: I can’t lie, I want that. But I also think we have to be careful not to rush into anything.
Ettore: I’m ready to rush in like a bull. But I know you’re right. I know we have to think of everybody else. But I’ve never felt this way before. I didn’t think a man like me could feel this way. I’m already thinking of a future together.
So am I, in snippets in the back of my mind. Long, sunny days spent in this estate, taking care of Sylvie, knitting, learning new hobbies. Or simply existing. Watching movies with Ettore, laughing, bonding, more life-changing sex, more life-changing small moments that have nothing to do with sex.
Mara: We can’t rush, Ettore.
Ettore: But you want to.
I laugh, rolling my eyes. He’s right.
Mara: That doesn’t mean we should. About last night… what are we going to do if…?
I’m relieved when he understands what I’m asking without me needing to say it. He came inside me in the hedge maze. It was wild and hot, a burst of unplanned passion.
Ettore: We’re going to do whatever you want to do, Mara. And whatever happens, I’ll be there.
Mara: You’re starting to make me feel dizzy. Are you going to have another mood swing soon?
Ettore: That’s fair. But I’ve never had mood swings when it comes to you. I've always wanted you, I need you. I’ve just been pretending.
I’m so tempted to throw myself wholeheartedly into this, to ignore my doubts or my safeguards and just tell him I want it all too.
Mara: And here I was thinking you were supposed to be the mature one.
Ettore: I love when you sass me. Especially when I know it’s because you’re hiding just how badly you want this too.
Yep, he’s right. Hammer—meet the nail’s head.
Mara: Let’s focus on getting through this madness first. You’ve got a lot on your mind.
Ettore: WE have a lot on OUR minds. I won’t be able to phrase it this way to the men who think they matter, but I’m doing this for you too. For your parents. For your aunt. For the life that was stolen from you.
I close my eyes for a moment, feeling dizzy, sick with power, a little scared. When I open my eyes again, a smile slowly spreads across my face.