December 11th #2
Mom says, “Stay there. I’ll be right back.”
A few moments later, she comes back with a pint of strawberry ice cream and a spoon for each of us.
She holds her spoon up toward mine and says, “Cheers,” so I clink mine against hers.
Eating the ice cream helps calm me down.
“Do you want to talk about it?” she says.
“I got pregnant in the Ozarks. At our family reunion. Who does that?”
“Someone who falls in love with a very handsome man who is not a blood relative,” she counters.
“I was going to tell him. The second the test turned positive. I was shocked, but at the same time, I was happy. Really happy. And I know that Damon wants kids. I know he’ll be a great dad.”
“So, what stopped you?” she asks.
“We hadn’t spoken on the phone for a bit.
He was moving to school and then started practice, and I was working long hours to get the project plans all done.
And he was just so excited to tell me everything.
He was going on about football—the facilities, the coaches, his teammates—and how great everything was.
I was so happy for him. He seemed in his element and loving every minute of it.
“I was ready to just blurt it out, but then he mentioned a party a lot of the guys were going to that night. And how the coach said he didn’t want anyone getting into any trouble before the season even started.
I still remember exactly what he told me his coach said.
No arrests or scandals and absolutely no headlines until we open fall practices to the press.
“And all I could see were the headlines. Five-star recruit gets his twenty-two-year-old girlfriend pregnant. Danny Diamond’s son, five-star recruit Damon, who just turned eighteen, is expecting a baby with his older girlfriend. And I just couldn’t do that to him.”
“I assume Sammy knows?” Mom asks.
“He does. But I didn’t tell him either. He just—well, it started to become obvious.”
“And you’ve gone through pregnancy all on your own? Have you been feeling well?”
“I have. Mentally, in some ways, I’ve been sort of pretending that I’m not pregnant.”
Mom narrows her eyes at me.
“That didn’t come out right. I’ve been doing everything I should be.
Seeing the doctor, eating right, taking my vitamins, exercising, talking to the baby, listening to classical music.
But if it wasn’t for the fact that I didn’t want you to be surprised at graduation tomorrow, I wouldn’t have told you.
Same for Sammy. I want Damon to be the first to know, you know?
And I needed to wait until he got through his first season.
Proved himself. They’ve done so well. They made the playoffs and could have three more games, but I decided to drive up there tomorrow after graduation and tell him. ”
“His mom told me that he asked you to move in with him.”
“He—well, we both wanted that. I got offered a job where I could work from anywhere and told him that I’d be moving in with him. We were really excited. But then a few days later, I got offered the dream job.”
“The dream job? What will you be doing?”
“Learning from Jadyn Mackenzie how to run the business she sold to Tripp. I’ll sort of be a combination of executive assistant and design manager. The goal is that in two years, I will completely take over, and she will consult.”
“That’s amazing, honey. Congratulations.”
“Thank you. The only downside is that my office is in Kansas City. And I had to tell Damon. And he wasn’t happy.
Told me that I didn’t need to work. But I have to!
But he finally agreed we could continue to do the distance thing.
But really, I think it will be okay. He has two more years before he can get drafted.
I’ll have two years of learning. And after that, I can work from anywhere. ”
“That sounds like a good plan. Except for the part that you’re having his baby.”
“I know. It’s complicated. And I’m sorry I lied to you and told you that I was looking for a place for Sammy. We’ll be staying roommates for a little longer, if we can find somewhere to live.”
“There are lots of lovely apartments in this town.”
“I know, but we’ll both be working down here, in The Plaza. We were hoping to live nearby. Sammy and I will try again after finals week.”
“Come in the kitchen,” Mom says, getting up. “I need to make a quick work call. Then we can talk more.”
And this time, I do take in my surroundings.
The house is gorgeous. Because Damon’s mom lived here, I would have expected it to be heavily decorated, but it’s actually really soft and pretty.
There is a ton of light coming in big transom windows that overlook the backyard, which features a sparkling pool.
Mom opens a well-stocked pantry and says, “Grab anything that looks good. I’ll be right back.”
When she comes back a few minutes later, I’m happily dipping pretzels in peanut butter and drinking a bottle of sparkling water.
“Who did you have to call? Are you loving your new job?”
“I’m enjoying it a lot actually. And I called Lori Archibald.”
“Damon’s mom! Ohmigawd! You didn’t tell her, did you? Did you?” My heart is racing with panic, and I start to feel faint.
“No, I didn’t. I wouldn’t do that. I simply asked her a question,” Mom says. “And based off her answer, I have something to show you. Come with me.”
I get off the kitchen barstool and follow her out the French doors to the backyard.
“It’s really pretty back here,” I tell her. “I bet you are just loving living here. So posh and pretty. Amazing location.”
“I am loving it.” She doesn’t say anything further, just leads me past the pool and down a path.
And set back in the trees is a little cottage.
“Do you have a she shed too?” I ask, but then on further inspection, I realize what it is. “Oh, wait. Is that the original carriage house?”
“It is,” Mom says, giving me another short answer.
“That’s cool. Did you get a new car or something that you want to show me?”
“No.” When we get to the door, she opens it and says, “Go on in.”
“Oh, Mom, this place is adorable! Do you spend any time out here?”
“I agree, but, no, I don’t. The house is too big for me as it is. This cottage has two bedrooms downstairs and a loft bedroom upstairs.”
“Cool. So, once they sell the house, are you going to live back here? Like rent the place?” I wonder.
“I’m actually going to be staying in the house for a while. Van said that real estate is a sound investment, and I am welcome to stay for as long as I want. I know you need your own space, and I don’t know how this compares to the apartments you have been looking at—”
“Are you saying Sammy and I could live here?! With you?”
“Well, on the same property, yes, but you’d have this space to yourself.”
I throw my arms around my mom and break down in tears. “That would be incredible. Thank you so much.”
“Come sit down. We should talk.”
“Why do I feel like I’m in trouble all of a sudden?”
“You aren’t, honey. While we were in the Ozarks, Sammy called me because he couldn’t reach you. You know how he is.”
“He can’t keep his mouth shut about anything,” I say with a laugh.
“And he might have mentioned the drought.” I cover my face with my hands and shake my head. “And it’s my understanding that the rain finally arrived.”
“Oh my goodness. He has such a big mouth. But that is when I got pregnant. Are you terribly mad at me for not telling you?”
“I do wish you would have told me earlier, but that’s water under the bridge now.
What I wanted to talk about is your support system.
If you’re going to live in Kansas City while Damon’s at school, I want you to have help.
Support. From all our families. And when Damon does visit, I think you should have a space for just your family. For you, Damon, and the baby.”
“But what about Sammy?”
“I have an idea for Sammy. We’ll talk about that later. Do you think you should call him? Like, before you go see him? Like you did me maybe?”
“Remember the night I told you I was feeling a little under the weather when I was in Fort Worth? I took a pregnancy test that night. It was, obviously, positive. And I can tell by the look on your face that you think it was … kinda wrong of me not to have already told him. And trust me, I’ve wanted to so many times. ” Tears start to fall down my cheeks.
“Ainsley,” Mom says, giving my hand a squeeze.
“But I just couldn’t do it. He has so much he wants to do in life, and I don’t want to distract him from it. And I don’t want a scandal for him.”
“Having a baby is hardly a scandal,” Mom argues.
“I don’t want to be just some baby mama either.”
“Well, you already are, so—”
“And I don’t want him to transfer schools. He’s meant to be there. He’s meant to live out his dream.”
“And that’s why you haven’t come home?” she asks me.
“Yeah.”
“You’re not being fair to the father or his family. And to be honest, you’re not being fair to your baby.”
“What do you mean?” I ask with a gasp.
“I mean that there is a whole wonderful, loving family that your baby is going to miss out on if you lie to them. Not to mention the missed bond of the baby’s father.”
“You’re acting like I’m never going to tell him. I just haven’t told him yet. Also, he’s only eighteen.”
“I don’t care. One, he doesn’t act like it. And two, he doesn’t act like it.”
My mind is transported back to us in the Ozarks, my list of things I told him. My excuses for not being with him.
“Do you love him, Ainsley?”
“Yes. Why else would I agree to move in with him? Why else would I go through all this alone if I didn’t love him so, so much?”
“Do you love your baby?”
My hand flies to my chest. “Yes! Of course!”
“Then do the right thing. You need to tell him. Like, now.”
“I just told you that I’m going to tell him tomorrow.”