22. Juniper
“Ineed a big favor, Deck.” Celeste pulls him to the side of the beer tent. “I know you don’t want to do the auction, and I’ve accepted that, but we have a huge problem. Terrance Skylark was supposed to emcee tonight, and he came down with a nasty stomach bug, so we need someone to step in for him.”
“Yeah, I can handle that. Don’t worry, Aunt Celeste.” He puts his arm around her. “I won’t let you down.”
My parents are still the only ones who know about Deck and me. It’s not that we’re still trying to keep things a secret, but with the Fest taking up most of our free time, we just haven’t had a chance to tell anyone else since last night.
“Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?” I flash him my best bedroom eyes.
“Like you need me to drag you to the back of this tent and set you straight.”
“You should take it as a compliment,” I tease as a pack of customers approach. “I just can’t get enough.”
“Even after last night and this morning?” He shakes his head. “And I was very generous.”
“Guess you’ve met your match.” The tension that hangs between us is palpable—sickening, probably, to anyone who has to be around us, but I don’t care. I’m lovesick beyond repair, but at least I’ll die happy.
He stands closer to me as the customers approach, his hand resting on my ass as he leans down to whisper, “You’re just a little slut for my cock,” right as they reach the table.
I float around the tent like a balloon, completely untethered from the ground I’m walking on. It’s not just about the insane sexual chemistry between us, although we excel in that area. It’s the comfort I feel with him—the security that I can be myself—and I know he’s not going to try to change me or tell me I’m too much.
“Hey,” he walks over to me once the customers leave, “where’s that head of yours?”
“Thinking about you,” I slide my hands up the front of his chest, “about us.”
“‘You’ and ‘us’ are my favorite things to think about.” He’s walking us backward but I press against his chest.
“No, there are way too many people here tonight.” I giggle and he stops to look around.
“Fine, but when I get you home tonight . . .” His lips trail down my neck, and once again, I’m completely lost in him.
Since it’s the last night of the Fest, it’s packed, but it makes our shift in the beer tent fly by.
“Ugh,I hate how much I smell like beer,” I groan, trying to mask it with perfume.
“Now you just smell like you’re drinking beer in a rose garden.” Milly wrinkles her nose, offering me a sympathetic smile.
“Great, that means I smell like my grandma.” I laugh, remembering her floral perfume that always hung heavy in the air.
“Where’d Deck run off to?” she asks as she scans the crowd.
“Oh, Celeste asked him to be the emcee for the auction later, so he ran over to talk to her,” I point toward the grandstand, “somewhere over there.”
“Good, that means I can talk to you without him here.” I lift my eyes to meet hers and she has a huge grin on her face.
“Ohhh,” I feel a familiar blush creeping up my neck, “so yeah, we’re, um, kind of together—oof!” She grabs me, pulling me against her and wrapping her arms around my neck.
“We’re going to be sisters!” She can’t contain her enthusiasm, her arms squeezing me tighter.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” I laugh, pushing her back slightly, “just dating, not engaged.”
“Oh please,” she links her arm through mine as we head out into the crowd, “we both know that it’s only a matter of time before you’ve got a rock on your finger and a baby in your belly.”
I laugh along with her, my stomach clenching. I haven’t allowed myself to think that far ahead, and while I know that Deck has made two comments now about marrying me, I’m also aware that we’re both wrapped up in the newness of everything. I want those things—I want to marry Decker and build a family and a life with him more than anything—but I’m scared. Scared that coming from a recent near-engagement, he might not want to jump into something so serious once the excitement dies down.
“How’d you find out?”
“Seriously?” She rolls her eyes. “Well, first of all, I technically didn’t know. I mean, I assumed after watching you two in that tent for, like, four seconds, but you just told me when I said I wanted to talk to you.”
“You bitch,” I tug her arm and she falls into a fit of giggles, “you tricked me.”
“Are you guys still keeping it a secret?”
I shake my head. “We just haven’t told anyone yet. We were trying to keep it a secret, or at least, I asked him to—just so we could enjoy each other a tiny bit before it became the next big gossip topic. But then I came home from work and he was sitting at the kitchen table, confessing his love for me to my parents.”
“He what?” She stops, her mouth hanging open. “And you’re the one acting like me bringing up marriage is moving too fast?” She laughs but I can see the tears pooling in her eyes.
“Oh God, Mill, don’t start crying!” I pull her aside so we aren’t in the middle of everyone.
“I’m just so happy for you both,” she fans her face, “I’m gonna have a sister.”
I try to get her off the topic, asking her about Kent and how life is going in Denver now that they’ve bought a house there, but it’s no use. She can’t keep the smile from her face as she talks about our nonexistent wedding plans and how our kids will be best friends someday. But 10 minutes later, I, too, am completely lost in the idea of what it would be like to be Mrs. Decker Slade.
“Hey.” I can’t get the stupid grin off my face when I finally reunite with Decker. He’s standing behind the main stage, setting up the mic.
“Hey yourself.” He doesn’t care that there are a few people milling around us as he pulls me to him by my waist and kisses me.
“Your sister knows.”
“Ranger tell her?”
“Ranger knows too?” I smile.
“Um, yeah, I kind of just let it all out to him after Camilla left. I felt like I was losing my mind and just needed to tell someone.”
“I don’t mind and I completely understand. But no, she said it was obvious after watching us in the beer tent for a few seconds.” We both laugh just as Celeste rounds the corner.
“Oh, thank God,” she sighs, “I couldn’t find you anywhere.”
“Already taking care of everything, Aunt Celeste. No need to panic. I promise I’ll give them a show.” He winks at her then me, giving me one last quick kiss before walking out on the stage.
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the annual Fall Fest Bachelor Auction!” The crowd goes wild, a smile spreading wide across my face as I watch him.
I still feel a tiny knot in my stomach when I think about Camilla. I didn’t ask Decker for the details of how their conversation went, or how things were left between them. I’m not sure if it’s just my insecurity rearing its ugly head, but the worry that maybe he’s not fully over her still lingers in my gut.
“Tonight we are going to present to you five strapping bachelors who will have you wanting to empty out those purses and wallets for a chance at one magical date with them. And as always, folks, remember: Tonight isn’t just your chance to let loose and spend your money, it’s also your chance to support an expansion of our local community center.” There are several hoots and hollers. “Every penny that we raise tonight will be going toward the new continuing-education STEM wing we’re adding, so don’t hold back on those bids.”
“Hey!” a woman shouts from the crowd. “Why aren’t you in the auction this year?”
“That’s a very good question, Mrs. Silvio.” He points toward her, walking to the edge of the stage while casually glancing over at me. Suddenly, my stomach is alive with dancing butterflies. “As a lot of you know, I have been a bachelor on the auction block the last several years, but recently, there’s been a change in my life.” He turns toward me, holding his hand out. “I’m no longer a single man, ladies and gentlemen, and if I have it my way,” I nervously step out from my dark backstage corner as he steps toward me and pulls me out further until I’m standing next to him, “I’ll never be single again.”
This time when the crowd cheers, he drops the mic, grabbing me and tipping me back as his lips find mine. He kisses me passionately for several seconds before lifting me back to my feet. I cover my face with my hands as the cheering only grows louder with shouts of Congrats! and About time! echoing around us.
He reaches down, grabbing the microphone from the floor as I turn to walk off the stage. My legs are still shaking like a baby deer’s, a smile still stretched so wide, my cheeks are starting to hurt.
“And on that note, let’s meet our first bachelor of the night. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Teller Danvers!” The bachelor’s entrance song of choice blares through the speakers as Teller prances out in a flannel shirt and some tight Levi’s, with his signature black cowboy hat. “Standing at six-foot-one,” Decker pauses and looks over at Teller, “so we’re allowed to lie on these. Okay . . .” He shakes his head and the crowd roars with laughter.
Teller rips open his shirt, flexing his abs before dropping down to do several push-ups as Decker reads off his accomplishments.
“I think you owe us a serious explanation,” a voice says behind me.
I jump, clutching my chest at the voice. I turn to see Brooklyn and Dolly staring at me. Their arms are crossed over their chests, frowns firmly in place.
“I’m sorry, I . . .” The women lunge toward me, laughing and embracing me in a full-body hug.
“Are you kidding me?” Dolly squeals. “We are so happy for you!”
I knew it was going to be like this once they found out—peppering me with a million questions about when it started, how it started, and every other detail in between.
“I promise we will have a girls’ night soon, because there are so many twists and turns to fill you guys in on, it’s going to take a bottle or two of wine—and probably several vision boards and perhaps a PowerPoint—to get through all the details.”
Dolly pretends to faint. “Exactly the kind of night I’ve been needing!”
“But don’t make us wait too long,” Brooklyn adds, glancing over her shoulder as Ranger walks toward us.
“Hey, Sis.” He gives me a wink, both of the ladies gasping.
“Oh God, you guys are ridiculous. Don’t make it weird now,” I tell them.
“Weird?” Ranger steps over to me and wraps his arm around my shoulder. “Nothing weird about it, Juney. You’re just finally where you’re meant to be, and we couldn’t be happier for you two.”
I snake my arm around his waist, hugging him against me. “Oh, also,” I look up at him, “I owe you an apology. Well, all three of you, actually, because I did lie to you about having a boyfriend.”
Ranger doesn’t miss a beat. “We all knew you were lying, Juney,” he chuckles, “we’re just glad you both finally saw what was right in front of you.”
By the time the auction has wrapped up, most of our friends have gone home with their kids, with only both sets of our parents lingering behind. I glance up at Decker as we walk toward where they’re standing on the dance floor, the slow strum of the band’s guitar bringing the energy of the night down.
“Oh boy, here we go.”
“Just relax, baby, and prepare for about a dozen questions about grandbabies.” Decker squeezes me against him, his hand splayed against my hip bone.
“There’s my boy,” Brennan, Decker’s mother, says as he leans down to kiss her cheek.
“Hey, Mama, how’s your knee doing?” We both glance down at the large black brace that surrounds her knee. “Dad out here spinning you around the dance floor already?”
“I tried to get him to take me for a spin, but he says I’m up and moving around too soon.”
“You know your mother, Decker—she’s bound and determined to prove the doctors wrong about her recovery time.” Decker’s dad, Colton, grabs my hand and gives it a hearty shake. “We were just talking about you two.” He nods toward my parents, a rare Colton Slade smile directed toward me.
“Talking about when you two are gonna settle down and give us a grandbaby,” my mom pipes up, her eyes already brimming with tears.
“Now, Mary, you promised,” my dad says, but she ignores him completely.
“Let me just say before anyone gets any ideas in their head,” Decker says, “we have not had any discussions regarding any of the questions I’m sure you’re going to ask us. And while we are extremely grateful for your support in our relationship,” he reaches out and squeezes my hand, “I think we’d both appreciate a little privacy until we have those talks ourselves.”
“That’s the right response,” my dad says, Colton agreeing. “No need to rush anything. Just take your time, kids.”
“Just not too much time,” Brennan adds, my mother nodding enthusiastically before we say our goodbyes and make our way to Decker’s truck.
While I know that the Slades already have three grandkids, my parents have zero, and even though they’d never say it out loud, the fact that they’re already in their sixties is something that weighs heavily on them . . . and me. Maybe that was my reason for wanting kids earlier than my friends. After college, they only wanted to focus on their careers and traveling, meanwhile, I dreamed of coming back to my small-town Colorado life and starting a family.
“You okay?” His shoulder bumps against mine.
“Hmm?” I pull myself from my thoughts. “Yeah, perfect.” I smile as he reaches around to open the passenger-side door. I scoot across the seat, buckling myself into the center seat while I rest my head against his shoulder on the drive home.
“Care to join me on the deck?” he asks as soon as we’re back at the house.
“Of course.” I wrap a blanket around my shoulders and take a seat while Deck lights the fire pit.
“Now,” he says as he sinks down into the chair next to me and reaches for my hand, “tell me what’s on your mind.”
I should have known he’d see right through me.
“How’d things end with Camilla? Like, when she left here, I mean.” His demeanor remains calm—no eye twitches or flinches when I mention her name.
“Very calm. I guess you could say pleasant.”
“Pleasant?”
“Yeah, strangely. The night we got back to my house from Fort Collins, she asked me if I was in love with you.”
“Oh? And? What’d you say?”
“I told her I didn’t know.” He looks over at me. “Not because I didn’t actually know, but because I hadn’t even admitted it to myself yet. She asked if I was in love with her, and I told her I’d tried . . . which, again, she completely saw through.
“How’d she handle that?”
“I don’t think she loved hearing it, but she also called me out on my bullshit—told me I didn’t actually try—and she was right. We talked about why we both made the decisions we did regarding the engagement. I was honest with her and told her I was running from you, and that I had no right to ever ask her to marry me. I mean, fuck, I hid her from everyone and told her as much.”
My breath catches in my throat. “Are . . . are you over her?” I can barely get the words out.
His eyes grow wide and then they fill with sadness. “One hundred percent, baby. Is that something that’s been worrying you?”
“Kind of. Not because I don’t think you love me, but yeah, I wondered if seeing her again—actually having her in your home—would make you wonder what you missed out on. Make you question if a second chance was worth it.”
“Oh, sweetheart, no.” He lifts me from my chair and pulls me into his lap. “I shouldn’t have even entertained her idea, and I told her that. I think I carried a lot of guilt with how everything went down—with how I handled things—and felt I owed her a second chance. But I never wanted one. If anything, when I saw her, it only made me realize more and more how hard I had fallen for you.”
“Does . . .” I fiddle with the edge of the blanket as I avoid his eyes, “does she blame me?”
“No, not at all. In fact,” he laughs, “she told me that she had a ‘Juniper’ back in Texas. One of my cowboys, actually.”
“Oh!”
“Yeah. Nothing happened while she and I were together, but I guess they have a past history.” He reaches for my face, turning so I’m looking only at him, his warm palm pressed softly against my cheek. “I promise you, I am fully invested in you, in us. There’s no one else. No lingering feelings. No unanswered questions of “What if?” in my brain or heart. There’s only you.”
I lean into him, resting my forehead against his. “Do you really want to marry me?”
The smile is instantaneous, his eyes flying open.
“More than anything. Do you doubt it?”
I shrug. “No, but I also know that in the early weeks and months—the honeymoon stage, I guess—it’s easy to get caught up in the emotions and feelings of it all. I just want you to know that I don’t need you to promise me that yet; I’m not going anywhere.” Decker slowly slides me from his lap, stepping toward the railing to look out over the night sky.
“I know I took a long time, Juney.” He leans forward, his hands gripping the railing. “I know I broke your heart probably more times than I realized along the way, but nothing I’ve said to you,” he turns around to look at me, “has ever been said without my entire heart.”
“How’d you know?”
He closes the distance between us. “I knew because every time you walked into a room, my heart skipped a few beats. I knew because every single member of my family loves you, and has a million and one amazing things they’ve said about you over the years. I knew because when I think about the kindness you’ve shown to strangers, to me, to my family, to everyone . . . it’s like nothing I’ve ever seen before. You cherish your friends,” his hands cup my face again, “and you love my family as if they’re your own. You love me unconditionally when I don’t deserve it. You’re wild and untameable, driven, and smart, and by God,” he leans forward, “you are the most beautiful woman in existence.”
I want to explode with happiness. I toss my arms around his neck, the blanket falling to the floor as our mouths express our love in ways that have me wanting him to drag me inside.
“But I think the real moment I knew was that night I kissed you. I can’t explain it, and it might sound corny as hell,” he chuckles, “but fuck me, that kiss was the turning point of my life. I knew that I would never be able to kiss another woman again.”
“And what if I hadn’t given you another chance?”
“Well, then I would have lived the rest of my life in absolute misery, dying an unmarried, unlovable old bastard who never, ever kissed the lips of another woman again.”
I can’t stop smiling. “You’re so full of shit, you know that?”
This time he doesn’t laugh. He brushes the hair away from my face, his expression growing serious. “You have completely wrecked me—destroyed me for anyone else.”
His lips are on mine, his hands lifting me up to sit on the railing as my legs wrap around his waist. His tongue slips inside, tangling with mine. I can’t hold back the moan that threatens to fall when he grinds his hardened cock against my needy center. I reach my hand down between us, pressing it against him as I lean forward and whisper in his ear, “Show me.”